12-30-00 Friday/Saturday

~Say you know but you don't, you'll give your love but you won't. Strechin' out your arms to something that's just not there.~

So post-date, and things have definitely changed like I assumed they would. I worked...it went quickly considering my anticipation. So Jon shows up at 8pm...a little early in fact, and informs me that we're to wait for Nicole and Tyler. I was...a little perturbed by this. I think I expected it to be a lot more personal. I wanted things to go smoothly, but I also wanted to actually talk to Jon. We decided to eat at Kewpee. Cause that was easiest to agree upon. Fine, we go there, and I find myself telling a story...that I really didn't want to remember. One of the girls who works there...well, I got into a fight with her in 8th grade. So I got to recap my one and only violent experience ever. Then we headed to the movie theatre. Did I mention that I drove? Everyone got in my messy dirty car and I drove. Anyhow, we went to see The Family Man. You know that Nicolas Cage flick. I don't think romance/drama...was right for the occasion. But it wasn't like there were a lot of choices. So, we pretty much sat in silence through the whole movie. Strange thing did happen though. While we were standing out in the lobby, Tyler was playing some video game...and I think I saw Scott V. This kid that I had a crush on in like 5th grade but he moved to Elida. I think it was him. James told me once that he played football at Elida, I've never really talked to the guy since 5th grade...but I looked over and it was like flashback from hell. Then he looked at me, and I don't think he recognized me...whatever. Anyhow, right...movie silence. It was kinda funny. (the movie that is) Then we got up afterward, went out to the car, and drove back to the mall parking lot where everyone's cars were, and we all left. I come home thinking about how lame it was...just cause it was pointless. It seemed like 4 friends...went to a movie...then left. It wasn't a big...thing. Which made me extremely mad for getting all stressed out about it. I suppose that should have been my first tip though...hello, if you didn't like the guy, then why were you all worried? That makes me mad too. So I come home and get on here, just to find him on icq. He messaged me, and we talked for awhile. Decided that we're gonna do it again, only properly next time. It was cute, he admitted to liking me on icq. Then I poured out my guts about how I need all this attention...and how I didn't know if it would work...I think I shocked...maybe even scared him a bit. But he's still gunghoe about doing it again. I think...see, it's just so frustrating...I hate dating. (and I can say that now, cause I've been on a date) I just don't understand why we talked on icq instead of while we were out. *sigh* So there you go. That was it. No big deal. Right?

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