Well my friends, I have another story for you tonight, and it just happens to be about balloons again.
There is something about children, that really makes me think about my own life and faith. So tonight's story, which happened only a couple hours ago, is about another little child at work.
Like most of the children I encounter, she too wanted a balloon. Yet, she didn't know what she wanted. She probably spent 3 minutes just deciding what kind of balloon. Finally, with some hesitation, she asked me for a flower. As I pulled out the color balloons she wanted, she immediately covered her ears with her hands, just in case the balloon popped. And even though both her mom and I told her it was ok, she kept her ears covered for the duration of the time. As I made her brothers balloon at the other end of the table she continued to clog her ears.
Now yes, its a simple story... however, I began to have a thought about prayer and faith while it happened. Prayer has always been tough for me. Maybe I didn't know how to pray, or what prayer really was. However, I think I know why I have hesitated when it comes to prayer: a lack of faith. Think about how often, we pray to God for something, yet don't really believe it will happen. I know I do quite a lot. I pray to God every night for the strength and endurance to finish my school work, yet in the back of my head I know I will end up going to sleep before it is all done. I pray to God my Father, that life will settle down soon, that everything will return to normal, but for some reason I know it won't. Just like the child tonight, I too have doubts that my balloon won't burst. I don't believe in the power of prayer.
Now don't get me wrong, I do pray. I have grown up around prayer. Pray before your meals, before you go to bed, before that big test, and pray for your friends that are sick. Yet I do now think I have ever truly grasped the power behind prayer, only because I do not think I truly prayed. Let me explain that.
The child tonight doubted my abilities as a balloon maker. She knew that there was a chance that balloon would pop, and she wanted to be prepared for it when it happened. She had no Faith. Even when it was someone else's balloon, not even near her, she was cautious and doubtful.
I too my friends have lived my life that way. I pray that the people around me will be healed, yet I think in the back of my head that it would take a miracle. I pray that I will do well on my test, only to realize that I do not know the answers and to get negative about it. I pray that "Unite," our new Christian club at school, will flourish and prosper. Yet in the back of my head I think that there is no way it will work.
It saddens me tonight to realize this. Just like Sarah in Genesis, I have laughed when others have prophesized. I have not understood Jesus' words to me, just like the disciples. I have seen the burning bush, only to think it was a trick.
My friends, true prayer only occurs when their is faith. Believe in miracles! Believe in the power of prayer! Believe that God is listening, and that He does care! Prayer without faith is only a spoken word into the darkness.
I say again... true prayer comes only with faith.
