| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Wisconsin Winters | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Temperature Farenheit scale | Them | Us
| 60 above
| New Yorkers try to turn on the heat.
| Wisconsin people plant gardens.
| 50 above
| Californians shiver uncontrollably.
| Wisconsin people sunbathe.
| 40 above
| Italian cars won't start.
| Wisconsin people drive with the windows down
| 32 above
| Distilled water freezes.
| Lake Winnebago's water gets thicker.
| 20 above
| Floridians wear coats, gloves and woolly hats
| Wisconsin people throw on a sweatshirt
| 15 above
| New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
| Wisconsin people have the last cook-out before it gets cold.
| 0
| People in Miami cease to exist.
| Wisconsin people lick the flagpole
| 20 below
| Californians fly away to Mexico.
| Wisconsin people get out their winter coats.
| 40 below
| Hollywood disintegrates and Washington, D.C. runs out of hot air.
| Wisconsin's Girl Scouts begin selling cookies door to door and let their dogs sleep indoors.
| 60 below
| Polar bears begin to evacuate Antarctica.
| Wisconsin's Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.
| 80 below
| Mt. St. Helen's freezes.
| Wisconsin people rent some videos.
| 100 below
| Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
| Wisconsin people get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.
| 297 below
| Microbial life survives on dairy products.
| Wisconsin cows complain of farmers with cold hands.
| 460 below
| ALL atomic motion stops.
| Wisconsin people start saying...."Cold 'nuff for ya?"
| 500 below
| Hell freezes over.
| The Minnesota Vikings win the Super Bowl and Wisconsin public schools will open 2 hours late.
| |
