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October 2005

Les Incompetents 'Much Too Much' (White Heat 7")

This lot revive the long-lost art of putting the labels on the wrong side of the record, which immediately endears them to me. They also have a left-handed sleeve too. Take note, Flanders. 'Much Too Much' is superb. 'My life's a mess and so's my hair - I'm groping for my underwear.' I love the singing, all the voices clamouring and clanging. The Holloways do something similar - it is the vogue. Closer to the spirit of The Specials than the bloody Ordinary Boys ever get. 'Reunion' takes more listening to - there's so much going on - but really impressive all the same.

 

Maps 'Start Something' / 'To The Sky' (Last Space Recordings 10" single)

In the local record emporium this wee gem was filed away under 'Post-Rock'. How curious - seeing as how Post-Rock is Dead (all fat blokes my age whining on about the price of stairlifts or something) while this magnificent single is oozing with aliveness in every exquisite groove, grooves which continue sighing delightfully and tuggling at your dreams even at the so-called run-off stage, where MAKE YOURSELF EXIST is scratched upon the vinyl. I'm always one for reading the messages. I can tell you a few, from DON'T DISILLUSION ME on 'Love Will Tear Us Apart' right down to RACE YOU TO EBAY on the new Pipettes single - I jest not. 'Start Something' is like walking into a New Age shop and discovering that everything within is true: crystals do emit vibrations and all your loved ones are just a dimension away. 'To The Sky' is the moment when that shoe-gazing angel you desired for ten tortuous years finally lifts up those gorgeous brown eyes and fills them with you. It is the last song of the evening when all you want to do is sway gently and hug the nearest person. Hold hands say yeah!

 

The Chalets 'No Style' (Setanta 7")

There are a lot of groups around today who look like they've just walked out of a Fifties diner. Drop-dead sexy the lot of them. But when you actually hear them play - what a disappointment, what a let down. No names, but you know the feeling. You're expecting a full on Spectre-style ear-toasting or, at least, some half-decent bubblegum pop and all you get is droning, postmodern Mom-rock. I wouldn't mind but they can't sing neither. NOT The Chalets! The Chalets can write a tune. Here's one, it's called 'No Style' and in a funny way it applies to all those groups that imitate the The Shangri-las so bloody badly. Three cheers and all that.

 

Good Shoes 'Small Town Girl' (Young & Lost 7")

Just when you think you've heard the future of British rock'n'roll there's always some fresh faced buggers ready to slap you around the gob and say 'F*ck that lot, get your f*cking arse over here!' I won't take my metaphoric Arctic Monkeys posters down just yet but I'm tempted. This is terrific. F*ck comparisons, just listen to that dazzling little guitar threading its way through it, that super singer effing and blinding. Four quid and no sleeve but I don't care. Worth every penny!

 

Kicker / The Butterflies Of Love / Comet Gain / Airport Girl 'More Soul Than Wigan Casino' (Fortuna Pop CD EP)

It's welcome to have four new songs from these groups; they've been away too long or so it seems. The Kicker track is first and rightly so. It is the outstanding moment of the EP. Their cover of The Inciters' 'Since You Left' presents what is probably Jill Drew's best vocal performance to date. Can someone tell me who has a better voice? KT Tunstal? Martha Wainwright? The girl out of The Duke Spirit? I don't think so. I defy anyone not to be impressed irrespective of the complex pop-politics of covering Northern Soul classics. It shouldn't be an issue really but it is, and I'd be lying if I said I had no time for sacred cows myself. If, for example, I heard that Bearsuit were to cover Mary Love's 'You Turned My Bitter Into Sweet' I think my anxiety levels would skyrocket. But maybe that would be a good thing. Isn't the essence of great pop music to provoke, to challenge, to destroy indifference? Yes? No? Don't care? Have you seen the charts recently? Have you seen the shit they sell in Asda under the banner of pop music?

Who could be left indifferent by 'Two Lovers' being given The Butterflies Of Love treatment? They have a style all of their own. Then we come to Comet Gain, one of the more divisive pop groups of the past ten years. Their version of 'If You Ever Walk Out Of My Life' is, we're told, 'rewritten in the pub to piss off the purists.' Yet I always thought of Comet Gain as purists themselves. I love them and yet find them intimidating. The reason they've never had commercial success (as opposed to artistic success) is because they have the unfortunate capacity to leave even their most ardent fans feeling inadequate. Most people, I fear, fear people who are so committed, so passionate in what they do and believe in. I think we subconsciously equate it to totalitarianism or something. Anyway, I don't know the original but this is a lovely track: insecure, warmhearted and slightly messy… just like you. Finally, Airport Girl overhaul The O'Jays' 'Lipstick Traces (On A Cigarette)' in a JAMC style. Brooding, rumbling undertow accompanied by shimmering, crystalline guitar, and percussion in the Bobby Gillespie style. Not as convincing as the Kicker track but then, to return where we began, the Kicker track is truly outstanding and would have made a classic single on its own. Soul music is still alive despite the best efforts of RnB to destroy it.

www.fortunapop.com

 

The Holloways 'Generator' (Sensible 7")

In the week that the Arctic Monkeys hit the charts this little gem sneaks out unbeknownst to all but those few weirdos who frequent obscure London record shops or manage to catch Lamacq on digital radio. The Monkeys are so unimpeachable at the moment - the indiestry has so much invested in them - that you hardly dare suggest that this is the better record. Lunatic talk. But this is the better record. Times ten. I'm not knocking the Monkeys. But why does everyone have to flock in herds? Two thousand people go to see the Sheffield band in London last week. Yet this record won't even sell half that amount and yet it's on their bloody doorstep. The Holloways. Of London. This is your Arctic Monkeys. Anyway, like I said, it's a brilliant ska-indie crossover in praise of the record player and its power on the youthful mind. I hastily amend my Top 10 of 2005 to include it.

 

Eighteenth Day Of May - The Highest Tree (Transistor 7")

Last year I was very much into Aberfeldy and The Memory Band and groups like that because they were vaguely folksy and had the odd fiddle here and there. They were kinda taking me in a direction I wished to go. But now I see the gilded spires of the city itself. The folk-rock revival is so underway its almost passing us by. So who will be its champions? The Eighteenth Day have the potential, when they let rip. They have more fine songs in there set than just these two. 'Sir Casey Jones' reminds me slightly of Parsons-period Byrds at first before drenching itself in autoharp and jangle bliss. 'The Highest Tree' features Allison, mistress of the dulcimer, on vocals - a reassuring sincerity to her voice - and as a song it has all that dissonance and impurity of the genre I love so much. You'll never hear the Eighteenth Day Of May of the Mike Harding Folk Show - and good: I despise all that over-produced, over-polished slickness, that closed-minded, closed-shop attitude of the folk-mafia. Anyway, this lot are influenced by Shirley Collins - can't say better than that.

 

Umlaut - Winter Coat (Fantastic Plastic 7")

Some call this 'Indie-pop' and they're probably right, but I dislike the term because it's loaded with preconceptions. It's not all sha-la-la hee-hee-hee. 'Indie' is bad enough, but 'Indie-pop' - there's nothing positive in such a term. Some of the most soulful, intelligent and talented artists are filed under Indie-pop and are therefore lumped in with some of the most soulless and untalented groups imaginable. I'm tempted to spend the next three days listing them all and telling you which is which, but I'll desist. I haven't made my mind up yet about Umlaut. The tune is infectious enough but it contains a dodgy la-la clappy-clappy bit I'd rather scratch out of the vinyl with a penknife. The vocals, I suggest, are kinda like how Eddie Argos would sound if he actually tried to sing those Art Brut songs rather than (wisely) just shouting them out. The b-side is about as memorable as a toenail clipping; it does get good right at the end but they cut it dead just at the point where it should have started. All said, it's OK and has a great sleeve (humanity amid geometric splendour). But Indie-pop? Aim higher!