::Chapter 3::
I sat at the small table in the club staring out on the stage. I
wasn't really watching the band, just kind of..looking out. Joel
walked up and sat next time. Damn him! Why was he always there? He
must've known what was going on in my head.
"Are you alright?" he asked. I nodded and half smiled at him.
"So we're gonna play a cover song. Everyone always goes nuts when we
play this, so here ya' go." Mike said into the mic.
I guess it's, not fair
for me to, not care
but I don't, and that's why
you think I'm a greeeeeeat guy
but I want you and you want me too
and you need this
wanna give it you!
And I thought this time I'd say something new!
Joel smiled when they started playing this song.
"Hey it's your favorite Reel Big Fish song. Let's go dance!" Joel
said enthused.
"Uh no I couldn't. You know I can't dance." I laughed nervously. Joel
grabbed my hand, I obviously wasn't going to get out of this.
"Come on. It's just a dance." he said. I stood up and sat my drink
down on the table. He pulled me into the pit area and we danced as
they continued the song.
I'll call you, I swear
So next time, be there
can't keep up, no more
should quit but, why for
cause I want you and you want me too
and you need this
wanna give it to you
and I thought this time I'd say something new
it's not cool, I do like youuuuu
and I want you feeeel that I do-dodo-do
la-da la da la dadaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Joel smiled as we danced, he sang the song to me, which started to
send me mixed signals.
I want you and you want me too
and you need this
wanna give it to you
and I thought this time I'd be someone true!
Well I want you
[yeah I waaaaaant you] And you want me too
And you need this,
I wanna give it to you-u
and I thought this time I'd say something new!
As the song ended, everyone cheered. I hugged Joel quickly.
"Thanks for the dance." I laughed. Joel smiled.
"The pleasure was all mine." The band began playing another song
right away, when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Joel furrowed his
eyebrows at the person for a second. I turned around, coming face to
face with Chad. Oh my god Chad. I had forgotten all about him.
"Hey!" he said, wrapping his arms around me. My eyes grew wide as I
returned the hug.
"Hi Chad. What are you doing here?" I asked.
"Well Meghan told me you guys were going to be here with some old
friends. So I wanted to come see what was up." he smiled. I turned
around to see Joel looking almost hurt. He was looking down at the
floor, but I could still see his hurt.
"Uh oh. Chad this is Joel, he's one of our old friends, and Joel,
this is Chad, my-" I was cut off by Joel.
"Your boyfriend? Yeah I figured." he sneered. Oh yeah. He was
definitely hurt. But wait, he hurt me first, so I shouldn't feel bad!
But I do. Joel extended his hand for a shake.
"Nice to meet you man. You've got a good girl here. Don't ever let
her go. It'll be the biggest mistake you could ever make." he said
shaking Chad's hand. Chad looked at Joel confused for a second and
then smiled.
"Yeah." was all he could manage to say. He wasn't exactly sure where
Joel was coming from. Joel looked up at the bar and then back at me.
"Well, I'm gonna go have a drink. I'll see you guys later." he said,
half smiling before walking off. I looked down for a minute and then
back up at Chad.
"Let's go sit down." I said, letting out a sigh. Chad smiled and took
my hand. As we were sitting down, Paul came up to our table.
"Hey E. Where's Joel?" he asked looking at Chad. I knew none of the
guys were going to like Chad. They weren't going to like any guy I
dated, unless it was Joel again. They all knew we belonged together,
they just didn't know why we didn't see it.
"He went to get a drink. He's up at the bar." I explained. Paul
nodded and still looked at Chad. I grabbed Paul's wrist.
"Paul this is Chad. My boyfriend." I said, giving him a look that
said `Please be nice'. He raised his eyebrows at me then looked back
at Chad.
"Nice to meet you." Paul said, shaking his hand. After a minute or
two, Paul walked away and Chad and I were alone again.
"So I was thinking Erin, well, we've got something really good going
right now." he said looking over at me. Oh no. Please don't let him
ask me to marry him. I can't do this. I stared at him, a blank stare.
I had no expression.
"Well. I was thinking, maybe we should move in together." he
finished.
"Why?" I asked. I wasn't trying to be rude but I just needed to know
what brought this all on.
"Well." he started, looking confused. "I just thought it would be a
nice change. That's all." he continued. I looked past him up to the
bar and saw Joel nursing a beer, looking like someone had just killed
Cash Dog.
"Would you mind if I took a few to think about this?"
"No. Not at all." he said, leaning back in his chair. I smiled and
stood up.
"Wait, where are you going?" he asked grabbing my hand.
"I'm going to go think about it." didn't he hear me the first time?
"Oh ok. Well come find me when you're done." he pouted. I kissed him
on his forehead and then headed up to the bar. I sat next to Joel.
"Are you ok?" I asked. He nodded.
"Yeah. I'm great." I could hear the sarcasm in his voice.
"Look Joel. I'm sorry. I didn't know you'd take it this way. I mean,
you've had about 50 girlfriends since we broke up. This is my first
boyfriend since we broke up." I explained. Joel sat his beer down.
"I don't care Erin. Like I said, I'm fine." he retorted. I sat there,
silent for a moment before Joel spoke again.
"Erin." he started. I looked up at him. "I'm sorry." he said simply.
"Sorry for what?" I asked. He looked right into my eyes, it was like
he could see through me.
"Everything I've ever done wrong to you. I'm sorry about telling
people that you cheated on me. I'm sorry for making that big scene in
front of everyone at our show that night. I'm just sorry. You've
always deserved better than me, but you always stayed by my side." he
said, tears filling his eyes. The tears had more than filled my eyes,
they overflowed and I felt them falling rapidly down my face.
"Joel it's because I was in love with you. I would've done anything
for you. I didn't care about all of those things. Well, except the
thing at the show. That really pissed me off. But I mean, I loved you
so much, that I would've done anything and I think that I got the
best that I could ever get!" I sobbed. God I had never even said
anything like that to Chad. Joel was the only person I had ever
confessed this type of thing to. But then again, he was the only one
who I ever felt for this way, or this much even. Suddenly I broke
down. I put my head in my hand and sobbed. Joel rubbed my back.
"What's wrong?" he asked. I shook my head.
"Nothing. Chad just asked me to move in with him." I explained.
"Oh. Well are you going to?" he asked, still rubbing my back. I
sighed and wiped the tears from my eyes, smearing my makeup.
"I don't know Joel." I said. "I'm not sure that I really want to." I
continued. Joel smirked and the looked down for a second.
"What?" I asked, angrily. He looked back and up pointed to my eye.
"You smeared your makeup." he laughed.
"Oh shit." I said, laughing lightly. I tried my best to get it off,
but when I failed, Joel helped me a little. I wonder where his change
of heart had come from. What made him feel this way all of the
sudden. I didn't get it.
"Well you probably better get back to your boy. He looks a little
worried." Joel said, picking his beer back up and motioning towards
Chad. I looked over to see Chad staring at us.
"Oh god." I said, grabbing my drink. "I'll see you later Joel." I
said walking away.
I walked back to the table and waited for Chad to stand up.
"I wanna leave." I said simply. Chad quickly stood up and grabbed his
hoodie. I said goodbye to Meghan, Benji, Billy and Paul and we left.
We got in Chad's car and drove towards my apartment. But the whole
time, I could only think about Joel. What was going on with me?
