The Leakey War
(memoirs from a German soldier)
When we went to the H.E. Butt Foundation Camp, we had
no idea what we were getting into. None of us knew that we'd be going into
war.
Our leader, General April Martin, had been trained for
battle her whole life. Once we had all gathered, she immediately began to
share her knowledge with us, already planning our strategies and tactics.
The war began when on our first day in the camp, Japan (Cabin 4) did a surprise
attack on Great Britain (Cabin 1). While England was temporarily deserted,
Japan snuck in and bombed their base with toilet paper. It was a total surprise,
since nobody expected any attacks so early.
Nothing had really encouraged us to go to war, except
for Gen. Martin’s need to torture the figures of authority. She’d been doing
it all of her life, and apparently she felt that once she had been taught
everything, her knowledge must be passed down to the future generations.
And what better way to learn than first-hand?
The Battle of Echo Valley
(April 24, 2003)
It started out as a small ambush early Thursday morning.
Gen. Martin had arranged for us to lay siege on the American headquarters,
trapping their leaders in their headquarters. At o-five hundred, Gen. Martin
and several of the braver German soldiers loaded up with weapons (some loaned
from Great Britain and the United States, due to their lack of knowledge
of our attack) and surrounded the American headquarters. As we waited, we
heard the fierce cry of a bobcat nearby, but we were not intimidated. Our
focus remained on the task at hand.
Several neutral soldiers emerged from the cabin, but they
were allowed to leave, providing that they remained neutral. After an hour
and a half of waiting, we successfully attacked one of the two main leaders
of the American army. Commander Busby emerged and was weakened by our soldiers,
due to her lack of weapons. The second general, Commandant Martin, the mother
and former mentor of our leader, remained inside, and we were unable to attack
her.
Once we had retreated from the American headquarters at
o-seven hundred, we saw that the rest of the American soldiers were making
their way towards our base, and we had to prevent them from making any moves.
We immediately returned to our base (Cabin 3) and met them inside. That was
where I took the first blow. We began to fire at the American soldiers, even
though some of our own soldiers were harmed in the process. As Com. Busby
entered the camp, nobody had realized that some potential weapons had been
left unguarded, and I took the first blow of the battle. Busby had found
one of these weapons, and as they found more, they became America's main
weapon. As she dumped the pitcher of water over my head, she had inadvertently
declared war.
The American soldiers soon escaped to France (Cabin 2),
but once they were inside, we guarded the exits and made sure that they wouldn't
be able to get out without being attacked. As they sung their battle cry
inside, they were also reloading their weapons and causing France to turn
against us. Somehow they made their way into Great Britain, despite our guards,
and they once again reloaded and caused Britain to join their side. Several
of our soldiers waited outside and taunted the Americans into exiting. The
war was soon taken into neutral territory, outside all of the other cabins.
The Americans soon ran out of ammunition, and we chased them into their secondary
headquarters, the kitchen, where they remained. We returned to our headquarters,
believing that the battle was over, and we had won. But little did we know,
for they were to return.
We once again gathered in our German headquarters building,
and began to celebrate our victory. As we celebrated, Lieutenant Cox saw
that outside, the Americans were coming to continue the battle, fully loaded
with new weapons. We immediately closed all windows and doors, and kept watch
to almost lock ourselves in. However, some of our inexperienced soldiers
didn't understand how important the battle was, and the Americans infiltrated
our camp. Soon, all of the active soldiers of both sides had taken the battle
outside, where it remained.
We waited outside our headquarters, occasionally peeking
around to keep track of the American soldiers' progress. After we reloaded
our weapons, we accidentally abandoned the hose, and Sergeant Thornton from
America seized it and used it against us. Cries of "All we wanted to do was
sing!" could be heard from the Americans as they threw pitchers and cups
of water at us. As Sgt. Thornton continued to spray us with the hose, our
remaining soldiers had a short meeting outside our base, and we decided to
take our hose back. We quickly turned towards her and ran into the crossfire,
where I attacked her with two pitchers of water, and Gen. Martin used Great
Britain's high-pressure, five-cannon water gun. Once we had chased her far
enough from the faucet, Lt. Cox ran in and shut the faucet off. Sgt. Thornton
had no choice but to drop the weapon, and we had successfully seized the
weapon back for our own purposes. We once again had a place to reload our
weapons without too much trouble. Lt. Cox again made an effort to seize the
hose that Coach Keyes had stolen from Japan. After some struggle, Keyes abandoned
the hose.
Once the Americans had almost no weapons, since the Germans
seized their main artillery, they were near defenseless. After many of us
had surrounded Sgt. Thornton, she was forced to surrender, and the Americans
retreated. The breakfast bell was rung, and we returned our borrowed weapons
to their rightful owners. The smell of victory was sweet. As a breach of
peace, we sang the Allies’ battle cry for them at breakfast.
Other Minor Battles
Later in the day, we (including Axis, Allies, and neutral
parties) were all required to meet at the shallow end of the river. We were
once again unknowingly provided with potential weapons. We were instructed
to use buckets to gather river water and fill a trash can that had a large
amount of holes in it. While many of the members on each team would block
the holes, two or three people were assigned the task of standing in the
river and filling the bucket. The actual battle was begun when Private Campbell
from Great Britain stopped participating with her teammates and jumped on
Captain Rodriguez from Japan, leaving them both soaking wet in the river.
The attack was regarded casually, as it was all in fun, but once everybody
had completed their task of filling the trash cans, everybody joined in.
Cap. Rodriguez filled a bucket in the river and dumped it on Com. Busby.
Busby quickly retaliated and grabbed a large trash can, chasing Rodriguez
into the river, where they continued their tiff. Busby was unsuccessful,
though, since her large trash can was less efficient than Rodriguez’s small
bucket. Other soldiers began to join the battle, but it was quickly over,
and both parties dropped their weapons. Lt. Cox quickly grabbed a bucket
and filled it, attempting to surprise another leader, Sgt. Thornton in particular.
I was to capture Sgt. Thornton, and then Lt. Cox was to dump the bucket on
her, but Thornton used her knowledge of the terrain to her advantage, and
I was injured by the rocks while she got away.
Once again, peace was achieved between all powers, but
Gen. Martin still had one more item on her agenda. She was determined to
lead a surprise attack on Commandant Martin, since we had been unable to
attack her earlier that morning. While all the leaders sat together by the
river, and the soldiers swam, Gen. Martin went around to a secret location
to fill up a bucket of river water, and from behind, she dumped it on her
mother’s head. Once all the other leaders had gathered by the river to see
what had happened, including Commandant Martin’s other daughter, the head
of the first aid station, they all began to attempt to push each other into
the river. After much pushing and resisting, Nurse and Comm. Martin ended
up swimming with the fishes in the river.
Later on in the day, once we had come back from our long,
tiring trip to the Bluehole, we discovered that while we were out, our base
had been attacked. The cabin had been “strung,” and there was maroon and
white yarn everywhere, so that the only way to get through was to crawl military
style. Whoever it was did a superior job, and we knew that it was a professional.
At first glance, we were all honored that somebody (especially such professionals)
had taken the time to do so much to our cabin, but we noticed that they were
in a hurry, since they had not totally taken the time to tie the doors shut,
or prevent us from entering, like real professionals do when they have the
time. From this, we gathered that they had probably done it while we were
on our way to Bluehole. Another observation I made was that the only beds
that they had taken the time to mess with were Sgt. Thornton’s and Gen. Martin’s.
This hinted that whoever did it was probably friends (or enemies) with either
of them, and that led us to suspect Com. Busby and Comm. Martin. This was
supported by the fact that at Bluehole, both arrived much later than us.
We never really discovered who did it, but now we have a pretty good idea.
And so was the end of the Leakey War. That night, we were
to pack all our belongings so that they would arrive at school in time. We
all took the time to enjoy the fact that in a sense, we were all even, and
that the whole thing was in good fun.
Katy Gonzales
April 27, 2003
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