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...you ask for walls
I'll build them higher
we'll lie in shadows of them all
I'd stand but they're much to tall
and I fall
february stars
floating in the dark
temporary stars
february stars

"February Stars" by the Foo Fighters

*The Twenty Seventh*

It is my father's birthday today and my mother's tomorrow. Everyone flog their inboxes with warm greetings and make them feel like they aren't getting older... (hehe)... Went to Stockholm before- very very nice this time. I had a lot of fun on the ferry from Helsinki and the few hours we were actually in the city. Visited the modern art museum and was further enraged by the absolute CRAP that falls under the umbrella of "art" these days. (Example: Some guy had a blank white canvas with four black lines spray painted randomly on it. Come on! That's an insult!) Then, all last week, we were in Lovisa, Finland on the school ski holiday and I tried cross country skiing for the first time--- definitely not my favorite way of falling downhill on my butt... And Finland has been having all of this controversy with drug testing the past week- which is funny cos Finland is hosting this whole ski thing and it is kinda international. The doctors are trying to convince everyone that NINETY percent of all the Finnish skiiers are asthmatic and that's why they're all doped up all the time. And the radio now subsitutes the word "Ski" with "Shit" (pronounced "sheet" here) when refering to the association. It's funny, like I said... Hmm... other than that... not much else to report. Still freezing cold here and now MORE snow, but I am optimistic that spring is coming and if it doesn't show signs of it soon, then I will start my own association- Peoples Against Snow and Winter Association- in which all active members simply fall into hibernation until the flowers start growing again...

*The Sixteenth*

Today is Friday and I leave for Helsinki to go by ferry to Stockholm in less than 4 hours. I'm terribly happy about that... Then, we have this crazy holiday for a week and I'm going to Lovisa- we're supposed to ski, but there isn't any snow! It's about 40 degrees Fahrenheit outside and sunny! I'm not complaining... Happy Valentine's Day to everyone, a bit late, but better late than never... I was sick this past Monday and heaved for the first time in 6 and a half years- that's always a highlight... I think I'm better now, but I still get a bit queasy sometimes if I mix too many strong foods at once... Yesterday the 3rd level students had their last day at school and they completely took over and humiliated us- soaked us, made us worship them, painted us up with lipstick and this awful purple ink THAT WILL NOT COME OFF my face... it was fun, tho. All our senior students do at home is skip school... Oh well... I'd rather skip... Right now I have to go into town and exchange some money and purchase some- gasp- underwear cos the pairs I bought over here keep mysteriously disappearing and the ones that stick around are shot from the washing machines... So. Necessities... Sigh... I'm going now- this might be the last I write in Februrary- and if it is I hope you all have a beautiful month and I'll see you in March... (By the By- I have no idea what song to use for the March lyrics... if anyone has any ideas, then please email me. I'd appreciate it.)

*The Eighth*

At least, I hope it is the eighth... Not cold here anymore!!! Just lots and lots of ice, which proves to be hilarious. Life is still going on. My muse is about ready to leave, I can tell, but I am managing to write and write and write more, in spite of. For some reason, when I write with a calligraphy pen, the words come out better. I don't know. So...

*The Second*

And another month has passed. I confess to homesickness. I don't know why now, but here it is. I am having really crazy dreams about people back there and this morning I woke up screaming- my phone woke me up. A friend had called to tell me about a guy. Hmm... I will get through it, though, because I only have months left here and even it that seems an eternity, it isn't- and it won't be, retrospectively. We're having a party tonight and Em and I are trying to take a laid-back approach to it, but I'm honestly reeling inside- a million things running through my head. And the Aussies have arrived again. Test Week is over and it is back to school for the fourth of five periods- I feel like I'm repeating myself cos I've told this to so many people- and I'm in psychology halfway understanding it this time... It became quite cold outside. It is about -20 Celcius and 4 Fahrenheit, but I don't know if the windchill is included in that and anyway it hurts like none other to be outside in a way. Every sidewalk is a solid block of ice and the sun is shining unbearably as tho to tease us all. I wish it was spring. I wish it was spring.

go to journal.
go crazy.