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Hello!...... how are you?........ and other feeble greetings!! [02. 05. 2003] Unfortunately, I havent the time to keep up this webpage. Please browse if you want and sign the guestbook. Dave [02. 09. 2002] Lipstick on the mirror According to a news report, a certain private school in Victoria, BC recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of grade 12 girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror. [31. 08. 2002] Haven't been updating in a while, have I? Just to let you know that I've deleted my sound snipets and replaced them with funny pics! I know its been done before bu they use up less space on the server! So they will be in the Bits page.... [30. 07. 2002] I don't know what to write about, maybe if some-one e-mailed me a topic, I'd write about it..........but hasnt that been done before?? Went to a table quiz last night. I wasnt taking park, but correcting!, its great being in authority for an hour or two. It's very quiet today, even calm.. alot of talk about the tragedy in Co. Wexford the other day. I suppose we just are very lucky not to be one of those kids!... [29. 07. 2002] Well after a fairly busy day at Croke Park yesterday, its back to the dull-ness of the week. I've just heard that I'm back selling programmes next Sunday and Monday for the All-Ireland Football Qualifiers It should be a good few days, especially as Dublin are playing!! Donegal beware!! [26. 07. 2002] Victory!! Victory!! I have succeeded in uploading my wav files. I now have something of a webpage! EVER WONDER: Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? [25. 07. 2002] Another day passes and another new day begins! I've really got to know where the weather people get their information. We in Ireland have been given a wrong throw of the dice and have had a really bad summer, rain, hailstones, thunder, what you'd expect in the months of may, june and july. So when on Tuesday we're told that the sun will shine on Thursday and that we should have the sun-cream at the ready. we do we get............cloudy muggy weather!! I'm looking out now, its 1.25 in the afternoon and I don't see a hint of that big yellow belly at all! Fingers crossed though! A joke for you here, doesn't say much for us Irish people, does it?? Tim Shandy stepped into the Warm Spoon, a popular Galway tavern. To Mike Callahan, the barkeep, Shandy said, "Mike, I'll be havin' three whiskeys." Callahan set up three glasses and began to pour. "Now, Timothy, it's not the usual thing for you to ask for three whiskeys. It's celebratin', you are. "Ahh, ye know me too well, Micheal, ye do. Truth, and I'm celebrating me first blow job." Callahan smiled benevolently and set a fourth glass on the bar. "Now, that's special," he said. "For an old customer like y'rself, here's a fourth on the house, so I may be sharin' your celebration with you." Shandy shook his head, and replied "'Tis verra kind of ye, Micheal, but I'm thinkin' if three won't get rid of the taste, four won't either." [24. 07. 2002] Thanks to Alburl for signing the guestbook. Have most things working on the webpage except for the wav files. Until I find a way to get them uploaded, you'll have to do without. [23. 07. 2002] Just over 2 months have passed since I did something to to this page. Angelfire have cut me space, thank you Angelfire!! So I guess I've got to go on, head held up high! I've put a poll feature on the page. Nothing new, you may shout! I know but it adds to the page a bit, in its own little way. [22. 05. 2002] Just uploaded four snippets of some songs that I have written. I recoreded them last week so they are pretty new. Some have bad quality but I'm just working with what I have. Go here. [21. 05. 2002] Hey All, I'm finally finished my exams, so its time to concentrate on the web-page for a while!!! Hope you like it! This site is maintained by Dave Smith © 2002