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| Location: | Arena: | Date: | Attendence: | Event Rating: |
| Broadbent Arena | Louisville, Kentucky | 06/28/05 | 4,090 |  |
| Introduction/Back in Black Recap |
 [The AWA logo centers itself on the screen, but the usual cheers that accompany the opening of the show are nowhere to be found. Instead, they've been replaced by a loud chant.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! [After hearing the chants, it becomes clear that the AWA has entered SWF country. Louisville, Kentucky, to be specific. The old stomping grounds of the SWF, back when it was in its prime. But if you'll notice, it's the AWA that's still in business, not the SWF. A quick scan of the arena reveals the following signs.] We want Arkham vs. Haze! Dan Jacobs is a jackass! Big as life, twice as ugly, and oh, so Sadistic! [Cliff Anderson, J.J. Jackson, and Oxford Flanigan walk out as "We Die Young" by Alice in Chains blasts from the speakers. They take their spots at the commentating table and put their headsets on. The chants fade into cheers as Layne Staley continues to wail in the background.] Cliff Anderson:: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Broadbent Arena! Welcome to the AWA! Welcome...to Riptide! Oxford Flanigan:: Three days ago, we had an absolutely remarkable SuperCard. Back in Black was absolutely smashing! Cliff Anderson:: After three hours of carnage, Brian Zane walked away with his WHRO Television Championship intact. The Professionals retained the Tag Team Championships. And in the main event, in what many are calling a match of the year candidate, Haze and Mikey Wryght wowed the fans for a solid hour in their Iron Man bout. Oxford Flanigan:: But of course, it was Haze that waltzed out of Back in Black with the Heavyweight Championship on his shoulder and Richard Cormier at his side. But let's not forget about the incredible match that Billy Sadistic and Mandrake were involved in. J.J. Jackson:: Yo, dawg, them twos beat the sh{bleep} outta each othuh. Cliff Anderson:: That's right, and as a result, Haze, Wryght, Mandrake, and Sadistic have all been given the night off to rest their bodies after their amazing performances last night. [The AWA-Tron suddenly flickers to life. Afterall, what would Riptide be if there wasn't some sort of segment to kick the show off?] |
| "Rantin'" Richard Cormier |
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[Richard Cormier is shown walking down a hall somewhere within Broadbent arena. To his left is Cormier's Chosen Champion, as well as the AWA Heavyweight Champion, Hase, and to his left is the AWA Commissioner, W. Williams Suhgs. Bring up the rear are Cormier's enforcers, Kartier and Revilation. Revilation is wearing an eyepatch to cover his eye as a result of the incident that took place at Back in Black. The thunderous boos from the crowd are powerful and immediate. So loud, in fact, that Cormier can hear them echoing throughout the building. Cormier comes to an abrupt stop upon hearing the negative crowd reaction.] Richard Cormier:: I should've known. We're in SWF country! [The crowd continues to boo Cormier's mockery.] Richard Cormier:: I knew we should've toured North Carolina instead of this sh{bleep}hole. I forgot how ingrateful these inbred Kentucky rednecks were. [Cormier and company begin laughing as the fans continue to boo the man that they consider scum.] Richard Cormier:: Oh, don't worry, Louisville. We've got something special planned for you tonight! Ha ha! And I can't wait to see the looks on each and every one of your faces. [The crowd continues booing, but the boos eventually turn into a chant.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! [Cormier looks like he's about to vomit, but he quickly recovers and motions for his men to follow him.] Richard Cormier:: William, you have everything prepared for tonight's drawing, right? I don't want anything going wrong. W. William Suhgs:: Sure do. I've got everything covered. Richard Cormier:: And what about our little...surprise? W. William Suhgs:: I'm all over that one, too. Everything is ready. It's gonna be grand. [Cormier gives a satisfied nod as he and his goons continue on down the hall. The fans are still booing loudly.] Richard Cormier:: God, I hate this sh{bleep}hole... |
| Best of Seven Series: Match Three: Standard Match: Cody Duckett vs. 40 oz |
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 6'4" 275 lbs. Daredevil 0/3/1 |  |  6'6" 240 lbs. Powerhouse 1/2/1 |
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[The fans are still booing, and continue to boo as Cody Duckett makes his way down to the ring. He slides into the ring and awaits the arrival of his arch-rival, 40 oz. 40 oz makes his way down the aisle to a small reaction from the crowd and slides into the ring. Duckett jumps him before he's all the way in the ring, and Jimmy Jack Paige calls for the bell to start the match.] Cliff Anderson:: Well, it's no secret that Richard Cormier hates Bryant Dean's creation. It's also no secret that these fans hate Richard Cormier, either. But let's get to the match at hand between 40 oz and Cody Duckett. Oxford Flanigan:: 40 oz is leading the series with one win, zero losses, and one draw. J.J. Jackson:: Both dese crackas suck. [40 oz attempts to fight back against Duckett, but Duckett is relentless. Duckett pummels 40 oz mercilessly, gaining several nearfalls. The turning point in the match comes when Duckett attempts a running clothesline and gets caught with a spinebuster. 40 oz starts making a comeback, but Duckett strikes with the rolling German suplexes, followed by the moonsault to pick up the victory.] Cliff Anderson:: Despite the "boring" chants during that match, it wasn't too bad. Duckett picks up the impressive victory to even up the score. J.J. Jackson:: They still suck. |
| The Doctor's Office Guest: Brian Zane |
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[The ring workers quickly run down to the ring to set up the Doctor's Office as Duckett and 40 oz retreat to the backstage area. The camera pans down in front of the trio of announcers. While the ring crew hustles to get the set ready, the crowd becomes bored and starts up the familiar chant.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! Cliff Anderson:: There's that chant again. Oxford Flanigan:: What exactly are they chanting? Cliff Anderson:: Um...SWF, Oxford. Oxford Flanigan:: Why would they chant that? This is the AWA? Are they at the wrong show? Cliff Anderson:: Nevermind... [The Tag Team Champions, Dr. Payne and Allen Stevenson, make their way down to the Doctor's Office to a nice response from the crowd. The Professionals are wearing the gold around their waists as they climb into the ring. Payne sets his medical bag down on the table in the ring and grabs a microphone as Stevenson stands behind him with his arms folded.] Dr. Payne:: Ladies and geni{bleep}s...welcome...to the Doctor's Office! [The fans begin to cheer as Payne flexes the fingers on his "claw hand" before continuing.] Dr. Payne:: Right now, I'd like to bring out this week's guest. He put on one heck of a show at Back in Black to retain the Television Championship. He's the AWA's only three-time TV Champ. He's the Perfect Prima Donna, Brian ZAAAAAANE! ["I Believe in a Thing Called Love" by The Darkness starts up and out walks the WHRO Television Champion, Brian Zane. The strobes begin to flicker as the aisle is bathed in a purple light. Garbed in his black robe with "PPD" across the back in purple, Zane makes his way to the ring with an arrogant smile on his face. Zane climbs into the ring and spins around slowly before approaching Dr. Payne as his music fades out. Many of the fans are booing the TV Champ, but he pretends not to notice.] Dr. Payne:: Welcome to the Doctor's Office, Madonna. Now, you escaped last night’s Carnival of Carnage match with your title. You rode a go-kart. You dodged a Ford Bronco, and you even wrestled in a Home Depot. What thoughts must have been racing through your mind during the match? Brian Zane:: All that went through my mind was, "What on earth did I ever do to deserve this kind of punishment?" Because that's exactly what the Carnival of Carnage match was, it was punishment! Commissioner Suhgs made that ludicrous match just to make Cormier happy, and he did it without ever thinking of the well-being of the TV Champ. I was nearly a victim of vehicular assault, and I had to claw and scrape my way through the entire night just to walk out of Back in Black with my championship. In fact, I've made a request to the Board of Directors in the AWA to never allow such a match to happen again. Not just for my benefit, but for the benefit of any other champion who ever gets put into that situation! Besides, I'll bet Suhgs would agree, seeing as how his brand new Jeep was destroyed. Dr. Payne:: That's a very good point. Now Brian, during that match you also managed to score a cheap pinfall over me, the good doctor. So the way I look at it, Madonna, being that I am a former Television Champion and currently one half of the Tag Team Champs, you owe me a rematch! Brian Zane:: Heh, first of all, don't ever compare me to that 50-year-old hack of a musician! And second, maybe you haven't studied your AWA Rulebook lately, Payne. According to the rules of the Television Championship, the former champion is in no way entitled to a rematch! That means that I don't owe you jack, Doc! But I'll tell you what, if there ever happens to be an opening in my busy schedule, between my training, sunbathing, or just exploring the nightlife of Alexandria with my main man Edward, I'll seriously consider scheduling a match with you for MY Television Title. Next question! Dr. Payne:: Very well, I'll be ready. But just betwen me and you, it seems like you have developed a bit of bad blood with Rich Verboncour. Things have gotten very personal very quickly with you two geni{bleep}s. And I know about getting very personal with people, after all I'm a gynecologist. A WRESTLING GYNECOLOGIST! Do you have anything you want to say to Richie tonight? Brian Zane:: Ah yes, Rich Verboncour, the young snot who calls himself the One Night Stand. All I have to say to him is that for one night, yes, he did stand tall as the TV Champ...for about 15 minutes. As much as he says that he's better than me, it wasn't me he took out to win the belt, but it was me who beat him to get it back! Now between my win against him at Riptide last week, and my victory at Back in Black, he doesn't even deserve to be in the same ring as me! As far as I'm concerned, the One Night Stand can just make like his dad did when he took out Suhgs' Jeep, and skip town! Dr. Payne:: Ha ha ha! Well, now that you've gotten that off your chest, allow me to give you one of my business cards... [Stevenson opens his briefcase and produces a business card, then hands it to Zane, who reluctantly accepts it.] Dr. Payne:: ...because Brian, I must say, you seen like a pretty well-off individual, and I would love to add some of your lady-friends to my list of clientele. I guess what I'm trying to say is that my clients down South of the border just aren’t as...fresh...as some of your lady-friends. So what do you say, good buddy, how about hooking the good doctor up? [Before Zane can respond, James Nightbane and Machine hit the ring. Nightbane drills Payne from behind, knocking him into Zane. Zane, mistaking Payne's advance for an attack, begins laying into Payne with right hands. Stevenson goes after Machine with his briefcase and has him backed into a corner, but Nightbane jumps the accountant from behind.] Cliff Anderson:: All heck is breaking loose in the Doctor's Office! [Some of the fans begin cheering in recognition of Nightbane and Machine. The Brothers of the Dark Light and Brian Zane hammer away on the Tag Team Champions, but out of nowhere, Nightbane clotheslines Zane. As the brawl continues in the ring, Rich Verboncour and Josh McCool sprint out from the back! The fans begin cheering at the sight of McCool, who was at one time a champion in the SWF. Rich slides into the ring and goes right after Zane as McCool goes after Nightbane. Zane and Verboncour trade punches as Nightbane slides out of the ring to avoid the confrontation with McCool.] Oxford Flanigan:: This is getting out of hand! Cliff Anderson:: It looks like there's still some bad blood between McCool and Nightbane! [McCool clotheslines Machine over the top rope as Verboncour simultaneously clotheslines Zane out of the ring on the far side. The fans begin cheering as the Hooligans and the Professionals stand tall in the Doctor's Office. Zane makes his way towards the back with his belt in hand while Nightbane pulls Machine away from the ring.] Cliff Anderson:: Ladies and gentlemen, we'll be right back. We've gotta take a commercial break. |
| Commercial Break |
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[A man is seated at a blackjack table. He has a large stack of chips in the betting circle in front of him and the tension is high. The dealer places a king on the table for the player, followed by an ace. The man celebrates as some victorious music plays. Suddenly a man who is obviously a poor impersonation of W. William Suhgs runs out and begins yelling at the player.] Suhgs Impersonator:: That never happened! That hand never happened! That's it, you are BANNED from this casino! Give me those chips! [As the imposter Suhgs reaches for the man's pile of chips, he is leveled with a Facelift from "Son of a Gun" Josh McCool. He does a full flip in the air before landing on the table, breaking it in half and sending chips flying everywhere.] Josh McCool:: Don't let this crap happen to you. Come to the Borgata Hotel Casino & Spa and try to BEAT (he delivers an elbow drop to the fake Suhgs) the house! [The commercial fades to black.] |
| Tag Team Match: Super Bastardo Bros. vs. Willis Clayton & Grendel |
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Plaz Bastardo  Loki Bastardo 421 lbs. 12/2/0 | | Willis Clayton  Grendel  562 lbs. 0/0/0 |
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[Riptide returns from the commercial to find Grendel and Willis Clayton already in the ring. They're attempting to get the crowd involved, but the crowd has something else on their mind.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! Cliff Anderson:: Folks, they've been chanting all through the commercial break, and they haven't let up yet. Oxford Flanigan:: I must say, it was cute at first, but now it's just downright annoying! ["Name of the Game" by the Crystal Method starts up, and out walk the former Tag Team Championship, the Bastardos. Plaz and Loki head down to the ring to a mixed reaction of boos and cheers from the crowd. Loki slides into the ring, leaving a trail of baby oil behind him as Plaz simply steps in between the ropes.] Cliff Anderson:: Looks like the Super Bastardo Bros. are gonna have a little tune-up match here tonight against Willis Clayton and Grendel. Let's see if they've got any ring rust. [Loki starts the match against Willis Clayton. Loki works him over with a series of slams, then tags in Plaz. Plaz pummels his opponent, then allows him to tag in Grendel. Grendel charges the older Bastardo, but doesn't fare much better. Plaz suplexes him all over the ring before catching him with the Plazplex. Plaz tags in Loki, then knocks Clayton off the ring apron. Seconds later, the Bastardos strike with the El-Blow Job, followed by the cover. The referee makes the three-count, and the Bastardos are victorious in their return match to the AWA.] Cliff Anderson:: The Super Bastardo Bros. made short work of the opposition here tonight, but we expected no less from the two-time Tag Team Champions. |
| Mr. Commissioner |
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[The AWA-Tron lights up showing the Hooligans in the back preparing for their match. Rich and McCool are talking over strategy in their locker room when W. William Suhgs bursts through the door. Jerry Verboncour's eyes light up as a smile forms on his face. McCool and Verboncour stop in mid-sentence and look up at the Commissioner.] W. William Suhgs:: Just so you know, there's been a change in your match tonight. Rich Verboncour:: Oh, really? W. Williams Suhgs:: Yes. Really. I've taken it upon myself to change your tag team match into a tag team retirement match! And WHEN you two lose tonight, you'll both be out of the AWA...forever! Josh McCool:: What?! Rich Verboncour:: You can't do that! W. Williams Suhgs:: Oh, yes I can. Yes I can, indeed! I'm the Commissioner! I can do whatever I want! And tonight, when MY mystery men take you out, I'll get rid of two birds with one stone! Oh, I can't wait! [Suhgs puffs out his chest and stomps out of the room, leaving the Hooligans infuriated. Jerry, on the other hand, slowly raises a middle finger into view aimed towards the departing William Suhgs.] |
| Tag Team Match: The Hooligans vs. Mystery Opponents |
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Josh McCool  Rich Verboncour  532 lbs. 1/0/0 | | Mystery Opponent Mystery Opponent ??? lbs. ??/??/?? |
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[The Hooligans music hits and they walk out from the back to a nice ovation from the crowd. Jerry Verboncour walks out behind them whilst knocking on his helmet. Josh and Rich walk down to the ring and await their mystery opponents.] Cliff Anderson:: McCool and Verboncour are getting a raw deal here tonight in this match. If they lose, they're out of the AWA...and they don't even know who their opponents are gonna be?! [The Hooligans wait in the ring, but their opponents are nowhere to be found. Finally, W. Williams Suhgs walks out from the back with a microphone.] W. William Suhgs:: Ladies and gentlemen...I give you my mystery tag team...Project Mayham! [The sound of that name causes the fans to erupt. McCool and the Verboncours await the arrival of the Mayhams, but while they're waiting, facing the entrance, Marty and Max Mayham jump the steel barricade and jump them from behind! Max begins working over McCool as Marty pummels Rich. Referee Mitch Horton starts calls for the bell, starting the match.] Cliff Anderson:: Commissioner Suhgs has brought in Project Mayham?! Max and Marty Mayham are beating the living daylights out of the Hooligans! [The fans continue cheering as Marty knocks Rich through the ropes, then helps Max double-team the "Son of a Gun" in the corner. The referee finally forces Max out of the ring, but Marty already has a clear advantage over McCool at this point. Marty wears out McCool in the corner, then makes the tag to Max. Max puts the boots to him, then begins applying a series of weardown holds on the big man. After a few nearfalls, Max plants McCool with a piledriver, then tags in Marty to continue the abuse. Marty comes off the top rope with a big splash, but McCool gets his knees up. Marty writhes in pain as McCool rolls over to his corner and makes the hot tag to Verboncour!] Cliff Anderson:: The One Night Stand has hit the ring, and he's wreckin' shop! [Verboncour dishes out right hands to both Mayhams, then finishes them off with a double-clothesline over the top rope as the crowd goes crazy. Suhgs looks disgruntled watching from the entrance.] J.J. Jackson:: Them boyz juss got whooped! [Marty Mayham slides back into the ring and he and Verboncour lock horns. After trading blows for a short while, Marty stuns the One Night Stand with thumb to the eye. Marty takes over on Rich with a stiff powerslam, followed by a cover and a two-count. Marty climbs to the top rope and comes off with a diving clothesline, but Rich is waiting for him. Rich snatches his arm in mid-flight and drives him to the mat, applying Anesthesia! The crowd goes nuts!] Oxford Flanigan:: Rich Verboncour has that variation of a crossface locked in...and here comes Max Mayham for the save! Cliff Anderson:: And there goes Max Mayham! [McCool drills Max with a clothesline, knocking him through the ropes before he can break up the submission hold. After a few more moments, Marty Mayham has no choice to tap, tap, tap! Jerry gives a giant fistpump on the outside of the ring as Rich finally releases the hold. The Hooligans celebrate in the ring while Commissioner Suhgs throws a tantrum, complete with inaudible swearing and foot stomping. While this is going on, Willis Clayton sprints past Suhgs and heads for the ring.] Cliff Anderson:: What's Clayton doing back out here? Maybe he's still upset about what Jerry did to his Bronco at Back in Black... [Jerry turns around just in time and boots Clayton in the gut, then drops him with the West Point Stunner, causing the crowd to cheer again! The Hooligans exit the ring, and the three men walk up the aisle, mockingly waving at Suhgs all the while.] Cliff Anderson:: Wow, so much for a big debut by Project Mayham... |
| Interview: Billy Sadistic |
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Cliff Anderson:: Well, I've just received word that Billy Sadistic is gonna be coming out here in a few seconds to... ["Paint it Black" by the Rolling Stones hits, and the crowd erupts. "The Phenom" Billy Sadistic walks out from the back with his arm in a sling. He's got a microphone grasped in his free hand, and he's got a smile on his face. He walks down the aisle and steps into the ring.] Cliff Anderson:: It's obvious that these fans remember the Phenom. He's a former SWF Heavyweight Champion, and he's got a lot of fans here in Louisville. [Sadistic motions for the sound technicians to cut his music, then begins speaking.] Billy Sadistic:: Last night, me and Arkham beat the absolute he{bleep} out of each other! [The fans let out a cheer at the mention of yet another former SWF Heavyweight Champion.] Billy Sadistic:: But it was Billy Sadistic that limped away with the victory. I'll give you credit, you beat me like I've never been beaten before. But it still wasn't enough to keep the Phenom down! [The fans begin cheering, but Sadistic keeps talking.] Billy Sadistic:: And now that I've taken care of business, to borrow a line from the Professionals, I've got my next goal all lined up. Haze, I'm talkin' to you! [Once again, the fans go nuts at the mention of yet another former SWF Heavyweight Champion. However, this time the cheers turn into a proud chant.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! Billy Sadistic:: Now I know that this old body's seen better days, but I figure I've got a few big matches left in me. Haze, I'm challenging you to a match for the Heavyweight Champion. I don't care when, and I don't care where. All I know is that... [The AWA-Tron flickers to life, and Mandrake appears on the screen. He's got a sinister look on his face as he stares into the camera. The sight of the Kill Devil Hills Daredevil causes the fans to erupt, despite his prior misdeeds in the AWA.] Mandrake:: I'm afraid Back in Black was just the beginning, Billy-boy. You'll never be free of me. I'll always come back for you...always. [Mandrake begins laughing as Sadistic watches on with a scowl on his face. Suddenly, the crowd begins to cheer as Mandrake emerges from the crowd with a shovel in hand. He slides into the ring behind the Phenom and waits for him to turn. Sadistic turns slowly...right into a full-speed swing that catches him just above the temple. Sadistic drops with a thud as Mandrake begins wearing him out with the digging tool. After several shots, the wooden handle snaps in two. However, this doesn't deter Mandrake, and he keeps pummeling Sadistic with what could best be described as a club.] Cliff Anderson:: Mandrake is beating the life out of Billy Sadistic! Where's the security?! [About a dozen security guards rush out from the back to try to subdue the Crimson Demon, but he's there to nail each one of them as they try to enter the ring. A few minutes later, Mandrake is hovering over a dozen prone bodies, one of them the Phenom. Mandrake kneels down over Sadistic and begins pounding him with the shovel handle. The camera switches over to a pre-recorded shot of the crowd.] Cliff Anderson:: Mandrake has just opened up the Phenom, and the blood is flowing like a river! Folks, this is disgusting! Mandrake has lost his mind! Oxford Flanigan:: I'm not sure we can be showing th... [Riptide abruptly cuts to a commercial.] |
| Commercial Break |
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[A collage of photographs showing weapons throughout the ages flashes across the screen as classical music plays faintly in the background. Swords, axes, flintlock pistols, gatling guns...you name it. A very proper-sounding voice (with an English lilt to it) begins to speak as the pictures continue.] English Voice:: The Frazier Arms Museum, in collaboration with the Royal Armouries, holds in trust one of the greatest collections of arms, armour and related historical artifacts in the world. [The collage continues.] English Voice:: Many of the pieces displayed in the Frazier Museum once belonged to famous politicians and celebrities; noted frontiersmen and soldiers. At no other museum in the world will you find the ceremonial sword of Founding Father Josiah Bartlett, the family bible of legendary pioneer Daniel Boone, the "Big Stick" of President Theodore Roosevelt, the bow attributed to the great Apache warrior Geronimo, or the ivory-handled Colt pistols of General George Armstrong Custer. Thanks to the unique and historic collaboration with Royal Armouries, the Frazier will also display the arms and armour of kings and knights; the possessions of Henry VIII and Elizabeth I; and other wonderful artifacts from Europe that date back 1,000 years. [The collage switches into a shot of the inside of the museum.] English Voice:: The combination of these two world-class collections allows the Frazier to tell the complete American story. Not the abridged version that begins in Jamestown with the colonists but a larger story that begins in Europe some 600 years earlier. No other museum can tell this story like the Frazier. Through the use of powerful interactive displays, state-of-the-art multi-media presentations and dynamic performances by costumed interpreters, history will come alive at the Frazier as never before. Come see the history of mankind's quest to kill, maim, and generally f{bleep} each other up from the dawn of time. The Frazier Arms Museum in downtown Louisville...come visit or else. [The commercial fades to black.] |
| Standard Match: Machine vs. Allen Stevenson |
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 7'5" 432 lbs. Powerhouse 6/9/0 | |  5'11" 203 lbs. High Flyer 3/1/0 |
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Cliff Anderson:: Fans, welcome back. We were forced to take a commercial break due to the unsatisfactory content of our programming. However, Mandrake has been escorted out of the building and banned for the rest of the night. Oxford Flanigan:: Yes, and Billy Sadistic has been taken out of the arena in an ambulance. [The camera focuses in on the ring, which is now covered with bloodstains, as Machine comes out from the back, accompanied by James Nightbane. Some fans cheer, but most boo as the Brothers of the Dark Light head down to the ring. Once in the ring, Allen Stevenson's music hits, and he steps out from the back. His tag team partner and fellow Tag Team Champion, Dr. Payne, comes out behind him and the Professionals head down to the ring.] Cliff Anderson:: Nightbane and Machine came within an eyelash of winning the Tag Team Titles at Back in Black. Tonight, Machine looks for redemption against a man less than half his size. Oxford Flanigan:: This brings back images of World War II. The Nazis versus the Jews... Cliff Anderson:: Riiiiight. Well, Machine is a full-blooded German, and Allen Stevenson is Jewish. This should be interesting. [Stevenson and Machine square off in the ring, leaving Dr. Payne and James Nightbane to glare at each other from opposite sides of the ring. Perry Daton calls for the bell, and Machine goes to work on Stevenson immediately. A pair of powerslams later and Stevenson is hurting in a bad way. Machine hoists Stevenson overhead and moves towards the ropes.] Cliff Anderson:: Could we see a repeat of Back in Black? [Stevenson manages to wiggle free and lands on his feet behind Machine. Stevenson begins hammering Machine with his best right hands, but they have little effect on the Giant German. With nothing left to lose, the Jerky Jew drills the Giant German in his giant genitals. Machine stands his ground and slowly shakes his head from side to side.] Oxford Anderson:: Let me tell you, if I kicked a chap in his ballocks like that, and he just stood there...I'd run! [Stevenson begins backing away from Machine, and it's at this point that Dr. Payne slides into the ring with his medical bag in hand. Stevenson and Machine both turn their attention to the good doctor, and he does the unthinkable! He nails Stevenson in the head with his black doctor's bag! Stevenson flops to the mat.] Cliff Anderson:: What in the world is going on here?! They're Tag Team Champions! Dr. Payne just clocked his tag team partner! [Nightbane and Machine look on in confusion, and the referee has no choice but to call for the bell, disqualifying Machine. Upon hearing the bell, Stevenson hops back up to his feet, and he and Payne hightail it out of the ring to the back. Suddenly, the fans begin laughing.] Cliff Anderson:: I...I think we've just been had. The Tag Team Champions have just pulled one over on the Brothers of the Dark Light. [Nightbane and Machine stand in the ring glaring at the Professionals, who backpeddle away from the ring. Payne unzips his black bag and tips it upside down. Nothing falls out. It's empty! The Professionals have a good laugh before heading to the back, leaving the Brothers of the Dark Light incensed in the squared-circle.] |
| Up to their old tricks. |
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Cliff Anderson:: I can't believe that the Professionals just pulled one over on the Brothers of the Dark Light. They didn't look pleased when the left the ring, I can tell you that much... [The AWA-Tron comes alive, and we find Machine and James Nightbane storming through the backstage area. Nightbane doesn't look happy.] James Nightbane:: This is bad. This is bad! We need to do something to turn things around for us... [The two continue on until they come to a locker room door with the following printed across the front: "The Perfect Prima Donna" Brian Zane. Nightbane and Machine stop in their tracks, and the Dark One begins scanning the area for...something.] James Nightbane:: There! Over there, big guy. Go grab that barrel and set it in front of his door. If Brian Zane can't defend his title, he'll have to forfeit! Ha ha ha! [Machine walks off-screen, then returns moments later with a 55 gallon steel drum pressed above his head. Nightbane points at the door, and Machine gently places it in front of the door. From the way Machine handles it, it appears to be quite heavy. James Nightbane:: Good, now sit on that barrel and make sure Zane doesn't come out of that door. Man, most of the time, I scare myself, Machine. But right now...I've just amazed myself. Don't move, big guy. I'm gonna go win that title. [Nightbane pats Machine on the shoulder, then he turns and heads back out towards the ring for his Television Championship match. As he rounds the corner, Brian Zane walks into view from the other direction. He looks at the barrel positioned in front of his door, then at Machine sitting on top of the barrel. Lucky for Zane, Machine hasn't spotted him. The Perfect Prima Donna readjusts his championship belt, then shrugs his shoulders, turns around, and heads back the way he came.] |
| Standard Match: Fifteen Minute Time Limit: Brian Zane vs. James Nightbane | WHRO Television Championship |
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6'2" 225 lbs. Grappler 5/3/0 | |  6'6" 249 lbs. Mat Technician 9/8/0 |
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[The lights go out, and out walks James Nightbane. He walks down to the ring and climbs in.] Cliff Anderson:: Look at that smile on Nightbane's face. He thinks he's got this match in the bag... [Nightbane calmly waits in the corner as Zane's music hits. Zane strolls out from the back with a smirk on his face, and Nightbane jaw drops in disbelief. Zane climbs into the ring and hands the Television Championship to referee Perry Daton, then sets his sights on Nightbane.] J.J. Jackson:: Dat dit'n work out too good fer Nightboner... [Zane and Nightbane lock up in the middle of the ring, and a display of technical wizardry ensues. Counter after counter, including counters to counters, and counters to those counters dominate the first five minutes of the match with neither grappler able to garner an advantage. The fans have no choice by to give a round of applause to both athletes.] Oxford Flanigan:: I must say that this is some amazing technical wrestling. Some of the best I've ever seen. [The wrestling clinic continues as Nightbane and Zane chain together one maneuver after another. Several pinfalls are attempted, but nothing higher than a one-count is reached. At about the ten-minute mark, Nightbane takes control of the match with a thrust to the throat, followed by the End of Light!] Cliff Anderson:: There it is! Nightbane got all of it! [Nightbane goes for the cover, but Zane draps his boot across the bottom rope at the last second. Nightbane goes for an Irish whip, but Zane reverses. Nightbane reverses the reversal, and Zane collides with the referee, sending the official through the ropes to the outside of the ring. Abandoning their technical training, Nightbane and Zane begin duking it out in the middle of the ring.] Oxford Flanigan:: According to the clock, there are only three minutes left... [As both men are wailing away on one another, Josh McCool and Rich Verboncour sprint out from the back. McCool spears Nightbane, and Rich nails Brian Zane with a flying forearm. The crowd goes crazy as McCool deposits Nightbane on the mat with the WMD. On the other side of the ring, Verboncour has splashed Zane with the shooting star press!] Cliff Anderson:: The Hooligans are back out here, and they've just decimated Brian Zane and James Nightbane! [McCool walks over and grabs Zane, then drags him over towards Nightbane with the intention of draping Zane over Nightbane's body. However, it appears that Rich Verboncour has the same ideas for Nightbane. The two begin arguing in the middle of the ring over who is going to pin who, and as they're doing so, the seconds tick away.] Cliff Anderson:: Well, this is certainly a first. They're arguing over who is going to pin who. McCool wants Brian Zane to win, and Verboncour wants Nightbane to win. Ha ha! Oxford Flanigan:: This is utterly ridiculous. [While the Hooligans argue in the ring, the time expires. The referee comes to and rules the match in Brian Zane's favor as a result of time expiration. While the Hooligans are having words, Nightbane and Zane have recovered and aren't very happy. Zane jumps Verboncour and Nightbane attacks McCool. All four men begin brawling, and they spill outside the ring, brawling all the way up the aisle to the backstage area!] Cliff Anderson:: Technically, Brian Zane comes away with the victory in that match... |
| Commercial Break |
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[The commercial opens with a gap-toothed, obese man with an ugly combover waddling around a carlot. There are several crusty cars for sale with the prices painted on with runny white paint. None of the cars are worth even half of the asking value, but hey, that's what this sweaty car salesman is for.] Jack Deruke:: Hey there, partner! Jack Deruke here, and my business is cars! Buyin' cars! Sellin' cars! Drivin' cars! Wreckin' cars! Havin' sex in cars! Havin' sex WITH cars! I'll do it all! I believe a man should have an intimate relationship with the vehicles if he's gonna sell them, and no man is more intimate than I! [Deruke bends over and plants a big, juicy wet one on a rusting Fairmont, then pets it soothingly while whispering sweet nothings into its driver's side mirror.] Jack Deruke:: So come on down, and we'll set ya right up with your dream machine! New, used, trade-ins, financing...I do it all! And any sale over three-thousand dollars comes with a complimentary dead hooker in the trunk. But hurry, supplies are limited! [The commercial ends with Deruke bending down behind the Fairmont to "service" the muffler. And NO, not like that, you sicko.] |
| Cormier Speaks his Mind |
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[The AWA returns with "All in the Suit that you Wear" by the Stone Temple Pilots blasting over the speakers. The fans are booing at the tops of their lungs, and many are throwing trash, as Cormier, Haze, Kartier, Revilation(with eyepatch), and W. William Suhgs are all just entering the ring.] Cliff Anderson:: Welcome back, fans. That was the last commercial break of the night. Up next, we find out who will be competing next week for the vacant Atlantic Championship. [Cormier calls for a mic inside the ring and is obliged. Cormier taps the microphone head a few times before speaking, but the Louisville fans have already started up that familiar old chant, this time much louder than before.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! Richard Cormier:: Shut up! [This produces several boos from the crowd, but Cormier just smiles as he continues.] Richard Cormier:: Louisville, Kentucky. A bunch of inbred, half-retarded, drive around in my pickup truck, eat some fried chicken, have s{bleep} with my sister, idiots! [A full cup of soda comes inches away from hitting Cormier in the head, causing a loud cheer from the crowd. Cormier just smiles.] Richard Cormier:: Nice throw, but not quite. Now, as I was saying...I can't stand this place. I have you...people! Then why did I come here? I'll tell you why. It wasn't for financial reasons. He{bleep}, I could have made more money in the sweet, comforting arms of Virginia, so it wasn't for financial reasons. It was for one reason, and one reason only...the personal joy of screwing over Bryant Dean! [The boos shake the Broadbent arena after Cormier's last comment, causing a huge grin to split his face. Kartier and Revilation begin laughing, and Suhgs also seems a bit humored, but Haze isn't sharing their humored expressions.] Richard Cormier:: I hate Bryant Dean's guts! You hear that, Bryant?! I know you're watching. How does that make you feel knowing that the AWA...MY AWA is stomping around in your old backyard?! [Again, the fans begin booing. Actually, to tell the truth, the booing has never really stopped since Cormier's shown his face.] Richard Cormier:: And before we start this drawing to decide who'll be involved in next week's match for the Atlantic Championship, I've got one last thing to say to you. You people, much like the SWF, suck! You always have, and you always will! [A few more items are hurled in Cormier's general direction, but none of them hit their target. Suddenly, the lights begin to flicker, and "Bawitdaba" by Kid Rock slowly begins to build over the PA system. The fans immediately come to their feet as the AWA-Tron springs to life.] Cliff Anderson:: What's going on here? I recognize that music from somewhere... [The five men in the ring appear stunned as the watch the AWA-Tron in horror. Images of past SWF stars flash across the screen. The Outlawz brandishing the SWF Tag Team Championships flashes across the screen, replaced by an image of Donny J. McNasty battling Griffin Youngblood in the barbed-wire cage. Mr. Showtime is shown going toe-to-toe with Billy Sadistic as a ladder teeters in the background. A more recent image of Haze and Arkham is shown on the big screen, with both men battling it out for the Heavyweight Championship. A final image of Bryant Dean standing in the ring surrounded by rabid SWF fans on the outside is shown before three letters apear on the screen: S...W...F! The crowd almost riots at the sight of these letters, an the roar from the crowd is extraordinary!] Cliff Anderson:: I don't believe it...the SWF, here? [Cormier and his men appear mortified as they continue to watch the entrance. The music continues to play, but fades out after a few minutes. The fans look confused as Cormier and his goons begin laughing. Cormier begins pointing at the fans as he laughs hysterically.] Richard Cormier:: Ha ha ha! Gotcha! You all fell for it, hook, line, and sinker! Oh! You shoulda seen the looks on some of your faces! Priceless! Did you really think that the SWF was coming back?! Huh? No, I don't think so. The SWF...is dead! [The boos from the crowd are deafening, and the ring is now being littered with debris.] Cliff Anderson:: Now, I'm not a fan of the SWF, but even I have enough sense to admit that was wrong... |
| Atlantic Championship Drawing |
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Richard Cormier:: Now, let's get to this drawing. Hmmm...I wonder who it could be. Suhgs, you've got the tumbler prepared, right? [Suhgs nods his head up and down as Cormier approaches the drum full of the names of AWA superstars. Suhgs begins cranking the handle on the side of the drum, and the names swish around inside the cage. Suhgs stops the tumbler, Cormier opens the panel, and pulls out a name. Unfolding the piece of paper, Cormier shows it to the camera and reads the name aloud.] Richard Cormier:: And...the first participant in next's weeks match for the Atlantic Championship is...Kris Kartier! [A broad smile appears on Kartier's face as he and Cormier embrace, garnering them even more boos. Cormier nods to Suhgs, and he begins mixing the names again. After a few rotations, he stops, and Cormier draws another name. Cormier is smiling all the while. He unfolds the paper while reading aloud.] Richard Cormier:: And Kris Kartier's opponent next week will beeeeee...Donny J. McNasty?! What in the...? Suhgs! You told me you had the thing ready?! How in the he{bleep} is Donny J. McNasty gonna be at next week's Riptide when I...I mean Virus...removed him from the AWA? [Suhgs just shrugs his shoulders while looking as baffled as the rest of the goons. Cormier wads up the piece of paper and tosses it onto the mat with the rest of the debris.] Richard Cormier:: No matter. That'll actually make it easier to bring the belt home to poppa. Kartier, you're gonna have an easy forfeit victory next week when McNasty no-shows. I guarantee that McNasty, along with the Outlawz and Mr. Showtime will be nowhere to be found next week. And the week after that. And the week after that. And so on and so on. Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! Richard Cormier:: Oh, shut up with your SWF chants! Nobody cares! I've had the SWF scum removed from the AWA, and there's not a d{bleep} thing you can do about it! [The lights begin to flicker as a raspy voice comes over the speakers.] Voice:: ...it's coming...it's...come...it's come...coming...it's coming... [The lights go completely black.] Voice:: THE VIRUS IS HERE!!! [When the lights resume, Virus is standing in the middle of the ring, garbed in black clothing and a black mask. Cormier looks at him strangely for a moment, then extends his hand. Virus slowly extends his hand, and the two meet in a handshake, causing the fans to boo yet again.] Richard Cormier:: Virus, I'd like to thank you for services rendered, and I've got a giant paycheck waiting for you backstage. [Cormier turns back to address the crowd as his men taunt the fans on all sides of the ring. Richard Cormier:: Now where was I...? Oh yes. Donny McNasty! Mr. Showtime! The Outlawz! All of them gone! Kicked to the curb like the scum that they are! [While Cormier continues to run down the SWF and the Louisville fans, Virus slowly begins to pull of his mask. After a few moments, the fans recognize the man, and the place goes apesh*t!] |
| They're baaaaack! |
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Cliff Anderson:: {fan noise}y God! It's so{fan noise} I can barely hear myself! That's {fan noise}! [Virus pulls off the mask, revealing himself to be...Bryant Dean!!! The noise in the Broadbent Arena is deafening as Dean stands in the center of the ring, staring a hole through the back of Cormier's head. Cormier looks confused by the crowd's reaction to his negative words, and he slowly turns around. As he does so, Bryant drills him with a big right hand to the side of the face, knocking Cormier on his butt! The fans explode!] Cliff Anderson:: That's...that's...that's Bryant Dean! [Cormier holds the side of his face as he stares up at Dean in awe. After a few moments, Cormier's goons turn around and realize what's happened. The encircle Dean and move in for the kill. Before any of them lay a finger on Dean, the lights in the arena go black. "Bawitdaba" by Kid Rock starts up again as the SWF video package plays on the AWA-Tron again. As the beat to the intro of the song increases, S...W...F appears on the big screen, and the fans lose it. The lights resume, and Showtime, the Outlawz, and Donny J. McNasty are all standing in the ring beside Bryant Dean.] Cliff Anderson:: The SWF is here on Riptide! [Suhgs quickly bails out of the ring as Haze goes right after Showtime. The Outlawz begin duking it out with the Insurance Policy as McNasty grabs Cormier by the tie and swings him around a few times before hurling him out of the ring. Showtime hits a running shoulder tackle, knocking Haze through the ropes as the Outlawz send Kartier and Revilation to the outside with a double-clothesline. Within seconds, team AWA has been removed from the ring, and the Broadbent Arena is going absolutely nuts!] Cliff Anderson:: I don't believe what I'm seeing... [Bryant Dean motions for a microphone as McNasty, the Outlawz, and Showtime stand tall in the ring, taking in the cheers from the fans. THEIR fans.] Bryant Dean:: D{bleep} it feels good to be back! [Dean paces around the ring, looking up into the stands as the fans continue their chant.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! Bryant Dean:: I told the AWA that the Virus was coming. I told them that there were people ready to be infected. I told them that there were a select few with the right stuff in their blood. They knew there were plenty of people with the black and blue in their blood, and tonight the Virus has spread to four-thousand rabid people in Broadbent Arena! [The crowd erupts in cheers as Dean stops and stares up to all of the people in the rafters.] Bryant Dean:: Cormier, I watched you try to bast{bleep}ize what I created. I watched as each and every week you stooped lower and lower, hoping to steal a little of the magic that the Southeast Wrestling Federation had. Hoping to take what belonged to every fan in this arena just so you could fatten your wallet. I didn't let Dan Jacobs do that, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let an arrogant, snot nosed piece of sh{bleep} like you do it! [With that, the entire crowd goes crazy.] Bryant Dean:: What the he{bleep} were you thinking Cormier? You thought you could just waltz into my backyard? You thought you could put on a show in the SWF's home? Eh eh...I DON'T THINK SO! [Another brief eruption from the crowd. Cormier is shown huffing and puffing in the aisleway, but unable to really do anything about what is going on in the ring.] Bryant Dean:: There was a day when I would go to the ring like each and every one of these superstars standing here with me. I would pour my sweat and my blood into every match I was ever in. Eventually, the day came that I couldn't do that anymore. My back was thrown out and I was told that if I entered the ring again it would likely be the last time. So I put my heart into a different enterprise. I created Extreme Kentucky Wrestling, which went on to be the Southeast Wrestling Federation. I put even more sweat and blood into the SWF that I ever did in the ring. When the day came that I had to close the doors for the last time...when I had to say goodbye to these men for the last time...when I had to say goodbye to these fans the last time... Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! [The chant continues amidst the thunderous cheers. Dean stands motionless in the ring and appears as if his eyes are beginning to water.] Bryant Dean:: When I had to say goodbye to these fans for the last time, it was the worst day of my life. I spent the whole night in tears because I didn't think I would ever have the chance to please them again. And then I get to watch a worthless piece of SH{bleep} like you come out here and run a show for your wallet. You come out here and run down this group of fans that I hold near and dear to my heart. You don't come out here to make the fans happy. You come out here for your own ego. You come out here to make a name for yourself. Well, I've been quiet for long enough! It's about time someone knocked that goofy-a{bleep} grin off your face and gave the fans something to really cheer about. I promise you this Cormier, the next time you're in the ring with me, you will be flat on your a{bleep}! [The fans erupt one more time for Dean, apparently excited that someone is taking a stand against Cormier.] Bryant Dean:: It's been two long years, but I'm happy to report that I'm not going to take your sh{bleep} anymore, Cormier. I've come to right some wrongs and give the fans what they truly deserve. Back in Black was a good show, Richie Rich. I'll give you that much. But that's nothing. Mark down the day, June 28, 2005. The day the the SWF was Back in Black...AND BLUE! [With that, Dean drops the mic to the canvas as the fans let out a thunderous cheer for the SWF.] Cliff Anderson:: Oh, what a night! Folks, that's all the time we've got for tonight. For J.J. Jackson and Ox, I'm Cliff Anderson signing off. [Riptide fades to black with Dean, Showtime, McNasty, and the Outlawz in the ring and that all-too-familiar chant ringing in the background.] Crowd:: SWF! SWF! SWF! |
