50 Fun Things To Do On the First Day Of School

1. Smoke a pipe and resond to each point the professor makes by waving it and saying, "Quite right, old beam!"
   
   
2. Wear X-ray Specs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to focus the overhead projector.
   
   
3. Sit in the front row and spend the lecture filing your teeth into sharp points.
   
   
4. Sit in the front and colour in your textbook.
   
   
5. When the professor calls your name in roll, respond "that's my name, don't wear it out."
   
   
6. Introduce yourself to the class as the "master of the pan flute".
   
   
7. Give the prefessor as copy of The Watchtower. Ask him where his soul would go if he died tomorrow.
   
   
8. Wear earmuffs. Every few minutes ask the professor to speak louder.
   
   
9. Leave permanent markers by the dry-erase board.
   
   
10. Squint thoughtfully while giving the professor strange looks. In the middle of lecture, tell him he looks familiar and ask whether he was ever in as episode of Starsky and Hutch.
    
    
11. Ask whether the first chapter will be on the test. If the proffessor says no, rip the pages out of your text book.
    
    
12. Become entranced with your first pysics lecture, and seclare your intetion to pursue out a career in measurement and units.
    
    
13. Sing your questions.
    
    
14. Speak only in rhymes and hum the Underdog theme.
    
    
15. When the professor cals roll, after each name scream "THAT'S ME! Oh, no, sory."
    
    
16. Insist in a Southern drawl that you name really is Wuchen Li. If you actually are Chinese, insist that your name is Vladimir Fernandes O'Reilly.
    
    
17. Page through the textbook scratching each picture and sniff it.
    
    
18. Wear your pajamas. Pretend not to notice that you've done so.
    
    
19. Hold up a piece of paper that says in large letter "CHECK YOUR FLLY".
    
    
20. Inform the class that you are Belgian royalty, and have a friend bang cymbals together whenever your name is spoken.
    
    
21. Stare continually at the professors crothch. Occasionally lick your lips.
    
    
22. Sit in the front, sniff suspiciously, and ask the professor if he's been drinking.
    
    
23. Shout "WOW!" after every sentence of the lecture.
    
    
24. Bring a mirror and spend lecture writing Bible verses on your face.
    
    
25. Address your professor as "your ecelency".
    
    
26. Ask whether you have to come to class.
    
    
27. Present the professot with a large fruit basket.
    
    
28. Feign an unintelligible accent and repeatedly ask, "Vet ozzle haffe dee henvay?" become irratated when your professor can't understand you.
    
    
29. Bring a "seeing eye roosster" to class.
    
    
30. Relive your junior high days by leaving chalk stuffed in the chalkboard erasers.
    
    
31. Watch the professor through binoculars.
    
    
32. Start a "wave" in a large lecture hall.
    
    
33. Ask to introduce your "invisible friend" in the emptyseat beside you, and ask for one extra copy of each handout.
    
    
34. When the professor turnd on his lazer pointer, scream "AAAGH! MY EYES!"
    
    
35. Correct the professor at least ten times on the pronunciation of your name, even if it's Smith clain the i is silent.
    
    
36. Sit in the front row reading the professor's graduate thesis and snickering.
    
    
37. As soon as the first bell rings, volunteer to put a problem on the board. Ignore the professot's reply and proceed to do so anyway.
    
    
38. Claim that you wrote the class text book.
    
    
39. Claim to be the teaching assistant. If the real one objects, jump up and dcream "IMPOSTOR!"
    
    
40. Spend the lecture blowing kisses to other students.
    
    
41. Every few minutes, take a sheet of notebook paper, write "Signup Sheet" at the top and start passing it around the room.
    
    
42. Stand to ask questions. Bow deeply before taking your seat after the professor answers.
    
    
43. Wear a cape with a big S on it. Inform classmates that the "S" stands for stud.
    
    
44. Interrupt every few minutes to ask the professor, "Can you spell that?"
    
    
45. Disassemble your pen. "Accidently" propel pieces across the room while playing with the spring. Go on furitive expeditions to retrieve the pieces. Repeat.
    
    
46. Wink at the professor every few minutes.
    
    
47. In the middle of lecture, ask your professor wether he believees in ghosts.
    
    
48. Laugh heartily at everything the professor says. Snort when your laugh.
    
    
49. Wear a black hooded cloak to class and ring a bell.
    
    
50. Ask your math professor to pull th roll chart above the blackboard of ancient Greek trad routes down farther because you can't see Macedonia.