FANFICS GALORE!!
BEFORE YOU START READ THIS!: hello welcome to my dbz fanfic page (mostly vegeta even though i am not very fond of him but i like him..he's cool) but....ok i am opening a page for you to send me YOUR fanfics.but untill then if you want put them in my mail and if the make it up here you will get a little surprize!! so write a fanfic but make it good so you can get the prize..at its best..thats all i wanted to say but fell completely free to e-mail me any comments/fanfics/questions..anything of that sort e-mail me!if you want anything from this page...e-mail me (at the "main" page) and ...ok i will let you read now...
FF7's FUNNY! truth or dare
[shinra building]
Rufus-here kitty...here kitty kitty kitty...GET OUT HERE NOW KITTY!
Elena-(snicker)still looking for you dumb cat I see(snicker snicker)
Rufus-stop snickering at me and he’s not dumb!...just a little shy maybe, but not dumb!
Elena-what ever
[Elena walks out of the room]
Rufus-%@#$ cat!
[in the highwind]
Tifa-pick me Cloud pick me!
Cloud-ok ok calm down
Tifa-uh...dare
Cloud-ok um...I dare you to take that sword that we won at Gold saucer and put in on Rufus’s desk with a note saying “I’m going to let you see you father...Die!”
Aeris-this is going to be a laugh
Tifa-um...Aeris? aren’t you...died?
Aeris-well I came back
Tifa-oh...OK
[Tifa parachutes on the Shinra building]
Rufus-Get out you %^#@ing cat!
Cat-Hiss hiss!
Rufus-don’t you hiss at me you fuss ball! come here!
Cat-raw!
Rufus-you dumb cat you cut me!
Tifa-got to creep by slowly or he’ll hear me
Rufus-see how you like pesticide you dumb cat!
[Rufus starts pumping the gas out and green smoke comes form under Rufus’s bed]
Tifa-(wisper wisper) god that’s cruel!
Rufus-hu?...who’s there!?
Tifa-oh no he’s on me
[Tifa takes the note and places it on his desk outside and slams the sword on his desk]
Rufus-what the?
[Rufus walks out and Tifa hides in the closet just in time]
Rufus-oh my god!
[Rufus reads the note]
Rufus-how can that spook come back a second time?
[Some strange reason Sepheroth walks in]
Sepheroth-what? how could I have already done this when my swords here and my note?
Rufus-SEPHEROTH! oh god guards! GUARDS! save me!
Sepheroth- don’t $^#$ yourself ok!
Rufus-what do you want?
Sepheroth-I’m leaving
[Sepheroth fades into thin air and a guard comes in]
guard-everything ok?
Rufus-your late but everything’s ok...now leave me be ok!
[Rufus walks into his bedroom]
Rufus-here kitty kit...where’s my gas pump?
[Rufus sticks his head under the bed and the cat shoves the gas pump in his mouth]
Cat-Raw Rusts Re Rut Rapens Ren Ru Reath Ras!
Rufus-(choke chock) $@#% cat!
[Rufus falls over and the cat puts its head inside Rufus’s mouth and soon he puts himself inside Rufus’s body]
Rufus-wow not that I’m in Rufus’s body I can make a bad reputation of Rufus...he he he
[Rufus runs of and bumps into Elena]
Elena-did you find that dumb cat?
Rufus-uh don’t say that
Elena-wha?
Rufus-I wouldn’t say that if I were you
Elena-what ever
[Elena walks over and a slap comes from behind her]
Elena-! Rufus how dare you!
[Elena slaps Rufus and walks off]
Rufus-this is going to be fun
[in Rufus’s closet]
Tifa-ok I’m leaving
[Tifa steps on something]
Tifa-hu whats this?
[Tifa pulls up a cloth to see its underwear with a brown place between the legs]
Tifa-YUKE! sweat and Joke itch in one!
[Tifa runs out and see’s a latter outside of the window and she starts to go up]
Cloud-man that was cool!...Expecualy thanks to barrets underwear we stashed in there
Barret-zzzz...zzzzz...Don’t worry zzzzz...zzzzz...plenty of Barret to go around...zzzzzzz
Cid-what is he dreamin about?
Aeris-must me something to do about girls
[Tifa climbs in]
Tifa-oh man that was close...He is discusting
Cloud-oh...why is that (makes a quiet snicker)
Tifa-he has brown marks in his underwear from Joke itch and sweat!
Cloud-well (snicker-snicker) that wasn’t his
Tifa-what do you mean?
Cloud-there Barret’s underwear or should I say “Sleeping beauty” over there
Barret-zzzzzzzzz...zzzzz...zzzz...Oh yea...come here...zzzzzz
Cid-man I wish I was in that dream with whoever he’s with
Tifa-man I’m glad I didn’t go on that date with him last year
Barret-zzzz...zzzzzzzzzzz...mmmmm.....oh...tryin ta get away hu...zzz
[Barret flings his hand around as if to catch what ever he’s dreaming and hits Tifa]
Tifa-Ah why I auta just!
[Cloud covers he’s eyes and a bone crunching thud came from Barret]
Barret-AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!
Tifa-teach you to ruffle my buns!
Barret-What was that for? did I ah?
Tifa-you shur did!
Cid-ok ok Tifa just pick someone!
Tifa-oh, oh yea um...Aeris
Aeris-me?
Tifa-yea you
Aeris-um...truth
Tifa-ok...have you had a dream about...Cloud?
Aeris-!? I can’t tell you...its to personal!
Tifa-ok I’ll talk to you in the corner just me and you
Cloud-hay if she did have a dream about me then I should know!
Tifa-calm down...Its a girl thing
[they walk over to the corner and wisper]
[Tifa and Aeris site down]
Cloud-ssssooooo?
Tifa-I think your not prepared for the answer
Cloud-oh she did have a dream about me hu
[Aeris blush’s]
Cloud-I’ll just hear from the tape recorder
Aeris-!
Tape recorder-Aeris-ok ok I did have a dream about Cloud
Tifa-tell you’r friend Tifa
Aeris-well...I was in bed and he came in without a shirt and layed down in bed and got on top of me and started to shake me and-
Tifa-ok thats enuff
Cid-oooooohhhhh mmmmmaaaaannnnn She got hots for you cloud!
Cloud-shut up I’m tryin to hear!
[Aeris blush’s]
Tifa-ok ok thats enuff.
Cloud-wow I didn’t know you liked be that much!
Aeris-wwweeeelllllll...um, ah, er...
Barret-ok what ever lets get goin Aeris pick me
Aeris-um, ah um...
Cid-move it up slow poke
[Aeris gets up and runs to the next room]
Cid- did I say somethin?
Tifa-you shur did you punk!
[Cloud get up]
ok calm down I’ll talk to her
[Cloud walks over and stops behind Cid and punchs him in the back of his head]
Cid-uh!
[Cid falls down]
Tifa-surves you right!
[Cloud walks into the room]
Cloud-Aeris come on
Aeris-I can’t its to personal
Cloud-calm down its just a game
Aeris-you probebly hate me now
Cloud-no actualy I’m flattered
Aeris-really?
Cloud-really because your one of my best friends
Aeris-so...we should get back to the game right?
Cloud-I’d say so
[Shinra building]
Rufus-OK! whats going on here!
Reno-um...we found out that Cloud and his gang are playing Truth or Dare and this is one of the Dares they did.
Rufus-oh ok
Elena-you know...how about we join in there game?
Reno-what?
Elena-yea maby they’ll leave us alone
Reno-you think so?
Rufus-sounds like a good Idea (maby Aeris likes cats...or maby Tifa?)
[In the highwind]
Cid-uh oooohhhh. my...head
Tifa-feal the pain you earned it!
Aeris-hay were’s Vincent and Yuffy?
[a door opens and Vincent stumbles out]
Vincent- help me she’s, she’s!
Yuffy- get back here I’m not done yet!
Cid-is this what I think this is!?
Caitsith-oh dear I can’t believe there doing that in Cloud’s room
Cloud-hay stop that you mite ruin my bed!
Vincent-I’m... out!
[Yuffy pulls up her pants]
Yuffy-hay I said I wasn’t through!
Cloud-what on gods green earth were you doing
Cid-I’ll tell ya. one word “nooky”
Yuffy-what? I wanted him to hold my hand when I was on the pot!
Vincent- man it smells like dead rats in there!
Yuffy-hey!
[a knocking came from the door that leads to the ramp to get outside]
Cloud-what? who could be out there
[Aeris opens the door and Rufus looks at her]
Aeris-Rufus?
Rufus-Hey long time no see Aeris!
Reno-hey Tifa
Tifa-uh hi?
Elena-Hi Cloud
Cloud-um...why are you all here?
Rude-we heard you were playing Truth or Dare and we want to join!
Aeris-well I gess it wouldn’t hurt. Cloud?
Cloud-oh well come in
[Rufus, Elena, Reno and Rude walked in. Then Hojo?]
Rufus-hey what are you doing here you spook!?
Hojo-the Author gave me a second chance isn’t it just wounderful!
Reno-no its not!
Hojo-well lets just get to the game shall we?
Cloud-ok I think Aeris was next to pick someone
Aeris-I pick...Rufus
Rufus-oh this is going to be good...dare
Aeris-I dare you to...slap Elena on he bottom
[Elena cross’s her armes]
Elena-too late he already did!
Cid-really? Ha ha ha ha
Aeris-oh well lets let Reno pick
Reno-oh me? well I’ve been thinking of a really good one
Aeris-ok pick someone
Reno-um...Elena
Elena-me?
Reno-yea you!
Elena-um...ah...Dare?
Reno-yes! I dare you to do a lap dance on Hojo
Elena-what!
Reno-come on now rules are rules!
Elena-curse you Reno I’ll get you for this
Reno-what ever just get to it!
Hojo-oh dear
Elena-nothing personal and don’t get any Ideas or I’ll end you
Hojo-”......” oh dear
[Elena sat on Hojo’s lap and started to dance. Everyone laughed]
Elena-ok that dose it your dead when we go home Reno!
Hojo-I think there’s a little transformation here. Maby I should study this?
Cid-Oh man!
[Hojo sat still for about 30 seconds and got back up]
Hojo-I think I-I -I’ll go t-t-t-to b-bed n-now
[Hojo took one step and fainted and fell to the floor. Everyone bursted out laughing]
Rufus-Elena let me have your turn please?
Elena-ok fine with me
Rufus-oh joy I pick...Aeris
Aeris-um truth
Rufus-oh joy...do you like, cats?
Aeris-well I sort of like them. I think they look cute
Rufus-go on
Aeris-um I like to pet them?
Rufus-ok thats good
Aeris-ok I’ pick...Cloud
Cloud-zzzzz...zzzzzzzzz...zzzzzzz
Tifa-looks like you’ll have to pick someone else
Aeris-ok Cid
Cid-dare
Aeris-I dare you to...
Cid-yea?
Aeris- I’d better wisper it to you
Cid-fine with me
Aeris-(wisper wisper)Scare Yuffy realy good
Cid-O...K?
[Cid walks over into the next room]
Yuffy-whats goin on?
Aeris-um nothing
Yuffy-your hiding something. What is it!
Aeris-nnnnoootttthhhiiiing
Yuffy- Tell me you you you...slaker!
Aeris-excuse me but!
Yuffy-just tell me I hate secrets it drives me totaly-
[voice echoed]
voice-you stole my ma ter i a
Yuffy-no...no I didn’t
voice-yes you did don’t lie to me I can see you’r liying!
Yuffy-no...no daddy I didn’t steal you omni summon daddy
Father-yes you did. Now you will pay
[a giant sword hit the floor]
Yuffy-oh dear I think I’m using the potty in my pants
[Yuffy runs of into the bathroom and Cid walks in]
Cid-cool hu?
Aeris-how did you do that I really thaught that her dad was in there
Cid- no I just tried to mimic him
Aeris-you’ll have to teach me sometime
Cid- ok I pick...Rufus
Rufus-wha?
Cid- yea you
Rufus-im...dare?
Cid-I dare you to...open the door on Yuffy
Rufus-what?
Cid-yea go do it
Rufus-oh well rules are rules
[Rufus opens the door]
Yuffy-aaaahhhh! you perv!
Rufus-uh sorry but-
[a foot came in view and kicked him in the jaw]
Aeris- Cloud help!
[The cat started to squize out of Rufus’s body and looked at aeris]
Cat-drat I fell out
Aeris-aaaahhhhh!
Reno-no wonder he acted so darn wierd
Aeris-now I know why you asked if I liked cats!
Cat-well I wanted a new owner because jerk off here got mad at me and spraid me with pestiside last time he got mad at me (sob sob)
Aeris-oh poor kitty
[Aeris held the cat and hugged it]
Aeris-poor kitty
Cat-so...warm (pir pir)
Rufus-uh my head...my jaw?
Hojo-oh dear that lap dance I...a talking cat, what a perfect specimen
Aeris-leave him alone he’s so cute
Hojo- hand him over
Aeris-ok I see you are uneasy around Elena so maby this will stop you
[Aeris opens her shirt]
Hojo-!!!!!!! oh dear
[Hojo faints again]
Cid-wow!
Aeris-hope he forgets that
Cid- by how fast he went down he’ll foget what he did last week!
[Aeris blushes]
Elena-oh...oh well lets get going
Rufus-wha whats going on?
Reno-we’re doing truth or dare sir
Rufus-I want to punish that c...there you are
Cat-leave me alone!
Rufus-come on die like a good kitty
[Aeris gets up and hits Rufus in his nose breaking it]
Rufus-oooooohhhhh my nose you broke my nose!
Aeris-take this!
[She hits him in the head again and he breaks through the window and falls out]
Aeris-take Hojo with you!
[Aeris picks up Hojo and throws him out too]
Elena-.......oh well he deserves that lets get going on with the game
[a alarm starts to ring]
Cid-oh were low on fuel
Cloud-lets go to Coste-dele-sol and stay at my condo
Tifa-thats a good Idea
Aeris-it is geting late you know
Reno-oh come on its only 9:45 we can stay up were adults!
Red 8-well considering my age by my clan I still have a cerfu
Reno-I’ll consider you a man today
Red 8-r-really?
Reno-yea really
[Near the waste lands of the Midgar salom]
Rufus-uh..oh man
Hojo-oh oh what a sight to see
Rufus-oh I’m going to kill him!
Hojo-did you hear that?
Rufus-what?
Hojo-a rumbling under the sand?
Rufus-I don’t know what on earth you’r talkin ab- hu?
Hojo-SEE SEE what did I tell you!
Rufus-um...isn’t this were that uh Midgar s-s what you macal it?
Hojo-you meen the Midag salum?
Rufus-thats it!
Hojo-oh dear...look!
[the big snake pops up and hits Hojo]
Hojo-(wimper) mommy
Rufus-ooooohhhhh man
Snake-sssssssssssssssssssssssss
Rufus-uh s-s-see you l-later!
[Rufus starts to run but gets hit]
Rufus-oh what a world what a world!
[Clouds condo]
Reno-Aeris
Aeris-truth
Reno-do you like me?
Aeris-well your not a bad person
Reno-(wisper) yessss
Aeris-but I’m more towards Cloud
Reno-darnet!
Aeris-I pick...yuffy
Yuffy-zzzzzzzzz...zzzzzzz
Aeris-why is it that when I pick someone that they always fall asleep, right kitty?
[the cat is meanwhile under aeris’s dress]
Cat-oh man! wow...oh um yea Aeris
Aeris-you pervert!
[Aeris kicks the cat and it flies out the window]
man outide-aaaarrrrgggg!
Cloud-thats Sepheroth!
Sepheroth-darn cat!
[a cuting sound comes from outside
Cat-rrraaaa-
Cloud-poor cat
[knock knock]
Cid-I’ll get it
Sepheroth-hi I heard you were playing Truth or dare
Cid-yea?
Sepheroth-can I join in!?
Aeris-well I gess he could
Sepheroth-Joy!
Aeris-ok lets see...WAKE UP YUFFY!
Yuffy-aaahhh! oh um my turn?...uh dare
Aeris-come here
Yuffy-o...k?
Aeris- (wisper wisper) I dare you to shank Sepheroth when I ask for his help
Yuffy-ok
[Aeris walks over to the corner]
Aeris-oh Sepheroth can you help me?
Sepheroth-uh? ok
[Sepheroth gets up and Yuffy shanks him]
Red 8-oh man your sick!
[sepheroth stood with Teletubby boxers]
Yuffy-oh man your a quier!
Sepheroth-well I like the purple one because I like his magic bag
Yuffy-thats a pierce you gay wade!
[sepheroth pulls his pants up]
Sepheroth-I pick...Cid
Cid-dare
Sepheroth-go diping in the ocean
Cid- ok let me get my trunks
Sepheroth-no without the trunks
Cid-!
[Cid gets in the water]
Cid hey guys can I come out yet!
Barret-no not yet! he he he
Cid-come on guys its cold out here!
Woman on the beach-looken forward on you coming out of there
Cid-oh man!
Cloud-Man how long dose he have to stay out there?
Sepheroth-well about 5 more minutes
Cloud-oh! well lets get him out
Sepheroth- ok your the host of the game. (wisper) party pooper!
Cloud-what was that?
Sepheroth-I said I had party poppers
Cloud-oh ok
Cid-come on guys!
[Elena walks out with a robe]
Elena-here get this on
[Cid slips it on]
Woman on the beach-drate!
Elena-maby next time
[Cid loses grip on the robe and it falls to his knee]
Cid-urrg!
Elena-oh...!...nice
[back inside the highwind]
Cid-o-o-o-k-k-k-k le-ts st-start w-w-with Y-Yuffy
Yuffy-um...dare?
Cid-ok um...Drink all that wine and wisky thats left over there
Yuffy-I don’t even like Alcohol!
Cid-Rules are rules drink up!
Yuffy-ok
[Yuffy takes a mouth full from a bottle]
Yuffy-mm liquid candy!
[About a half an hour later]
Yuffy-hi ya all over ther!
Cloud-(snicker)
Yuffy-wa ya snickerin at? me?
Cloud-oh she’s really drunk
Yuffy-hu? oh a plane simulatororor! w-wers the drearn st-sticky thingy at?
[Yuffy grabs Cloud’s crotch]
Cloud-oh!
Yuffy-I think thats it? but its not there! must be broken
[Yuffy raises a leg and almost falls]
Yuffy-darn machines...can’t trust a darn one of em!
[Yuffy kicks Cloud between the legs]
Cloud-OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!
[Cloud falls over uncontuse from the pain]
Cid-gulp I’m not no machine too you know!
Yuffy-I’m goin ta bed ya all...see ya all tamara
[Yuffy falls asleep and lands on Cloud]
Tifa-well 2 down
Tifa-I’ll go for Yuffy Barret
Barret-hu? oh um...dare
Tifa-Barret I dare you to put Cloud and Yuffy in that bed in there and put lipstick all over cloud
Barret-o~h your mean really mean
Tifa-just go and do it!
Barret- I’m on it and I’ll take pleasure on doin this! HA HA HA HA!
Barret-oh by the way I pick Vincent
Vincent-dare
Barret-I dare you to aim this laser pointer at Rufus and act as if he is going to be killed
Vincent-ok
[Barret drags the two into the bed and pulls of clouds shirt]
Barret-(wisper)hehehe this is going to be so funny!
[Barret gets some lipstick and puts it on Yuffy and dabs her face around his chest and forehead]
Barret-man I can’t what for the results of this one!
[Barret leaves]
[Vincent aims the laser pointer and puts a small scope on it to see where its aimed at]
[Inside Shinra building]
Rufus-oh man I’m tired and dirty I’d better take a bath
[Rufus fills the tub with water and empties a bottle with daffy ducks head on it]
Rufus-Daffy your my favorite loney toon
[Rufus strips of his cloths and gets in]
Rufus-aaaaaaahhhhhhh...refreshing
[Rufus pulls out a battle ship and a rubber duck]
Rufus-(in a deap voice)ok mister ducky we have to blow you up
Rufus-(in a high pitch)no don’t hurt me!
Rufus-Boom! ah no you got me aaaaaaahhhhhhhh
Rufus-now the duck calls forth BARNY!
Rufus-(barny voice)I love you, you love me, we’ll be happy family-
Rufus-(as ship captain) no we must kill him AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGG!
Rufus-Barney saves the day and everyone chears yaaaaaaaay!
Elena-are you playing with that dumb Barney toy you took from Rude!
Rufus-uh no I’d never play with Barney...(Wisper)you’ll always be my friend barny
[a small dot apears on the wall and Rufus looks at it
Rufus-wha? Oh my GOD!
[Rufus runs out of the bathroom and runs in the halls with no clothes on]
Rufus-HELP SOMEONES TRYING TO KILL MEEEEE!
soldier-aaah! man you perve get some clothes on!
Elena-whats going o- AAAHHH! Rufus!
Rufus-you got to help me!
Elena-no wonder your so shy
Rufus-someones trying to kill me!
Soldier that just ran in-sur a person outside in an Air ship is shining a laser pointer in your be-oh man get some clothes on man!
Rufus-oh
[Rufus looks down]
Rufus-you all never saw this ok!
Elena-I want to keep it at that in the first place
Rufus-good
[the next morning]
Cloud and Yuffy-AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
[Barret roles over and smiles]
Barret-they woke up
[Cloud stumbls out with no shirt and is covered in lipstick]
Tifa-oh my god!
Cloud-its not funny! I role over and there she is!
Yuffy-I was drunk what do you expect!...Hey I don’t wear lipstick! who did it!
Cid-uh...I don’t know
[Yuffy grabs Cid’s collar and rases her fist]
Yuffy-tell me who did it @$$ wipe!
Cid-ah Barret
Barret-you’d better not test me I’m much bigger then you
Yuffy-oh yea HHHHHIIIYYYYA!
[Yuffy kicks him in the chest and Barret falls down hard]
Barret-oh #@%& man!
Yuffy-surves you right
Aeris-(giggle giggle) Cloud
Cloud-wha you want to start too?
Aeris-did you notice?
[Cloud looks down and see’s hundreds of lipstick all over his chest]
Cloud-oh man!
[Cloud runs in and he wasn’t wearing his belt and his pants fall down]
Aeris-oh man he has one on his right buttcheak too!
Yuffy-uh I’m going to hurl!
Tifa-barret!
Barret-what I think that was really funny
The end
Jerry Springer and Dragon Ball/Z
< Rated: PG
*Walks out on stage*
Audience:*Applause*
Jerry:Hi and welcome to the Jerry Springer Show! Today's topic: Dragon
Ball/Z and how they've had enough of it being censored. Please welcome
the Prince of the Saiya-jins: VEGETA!!Audience:*Applause*
Vegeta:*Walks out on stage and sits down*
Jerry:Now, Vegeta, can you tell us about how you and the other cast of
Dragon Ball/Z are tired of having there show be censored?
Vegeta:Our show is censored because they think its to violent and they
try to make it all nice and happy for two year olds.
Jerry:Oooo, pretty deep stuff. How do you feel about this?
Vegeta:I HATE it because no one gets to see how well I can really
fight! All my hits are covered and the blood is taken away! Dragon Ball
Z was made for thirteen year olds and up! And they go and make it for
three to eleven year olds! It makes me so *beep* MAD!!
Jerry:Well, lets get another opinion. Please welcome Piccolo-san!
Audience:*Applause*Piccolo:*Walks out on stage and sits down*
Jerry:Okay, Piccolo, what are YOUR thoughts on censorship?
Piccolo:I'm with Vegeta on this one. These people don't understand that
we enjoy the action of Dragon Ball/Z. They think we're a bunch of
candy*beep*es! They don't even censor it so it makes sense!! When Nappa
destroyed the town they say everyone got away safely!! BULL*beep*!!
EVERYONE WAS RIGHT THERE WHEN IT HAPPENED AND THEY ALL DIED!! THEY
WERN'T SENT TO THE *beep* NEXT DIMENSION!!
Jerry:I see, well, lets hear the other side of the story. Pleasewelcome Saban!
Audience:*Boo*Saban:*A few members of Saban walk out on stage*
Jerry:So tell us your side guys.
Saban:Dragon Ball Z is much to violent for little kids!!
Vegeta:THATS BECAUSE *beep*IN MADE FOR LITTLE KIDS!!
Saban:Who asked you radish head!?Vegeta:NANI!!
Vegeta and a member of Saban start fighting.Audience:JERRY!! JERRY!!
Secruity:*Holds Vegeta and Saban back*
Jerry:Lets here yet another story. Welcome FUNimation!Audience:*Applause*
Jerry:Now, I understand your bringing back the REAL Dragon Ball Z on
video. Is that true?
FUNimation:Yes, little by little we're censoring it less and less. We
think it should get as close to the original version as possible.
Saban:THESE KIDS DON'T WANT TO SEE VIOLENCE!!FUNimation:YES THEY DO!!
Vegeta:LETS GIVE'EM WHAT THEY WANT!!Everyone starts fighting.
Audience:JERRY!! JERRY!!Secruity runs out and joins the fight.
Jerry:Well, thats it for today. Come back next time for:Human women who
marry aliens and wind up getting involved over conflicts to save theworld!!
THE END!
Vegeta Vs. McDonald's
(Guest Starring PICCOLO!)
"Well, sir, what will it be?" the clerk asked impatiently.
"Quiet! Don't you dare to question the prince of the Saiya-jins!" Vegeta scolded as he continued to look at the list of foods behind the register. "What trash..." he continued. "All of this food is so unhealthy. Not worthy of consumption by a Saiyan. Why on Earth does Bulma like this stuff?"
"Well, what do you want?" the clerk asked yet again.
"I said quiet!" Vegeta yelled. "Get me an order of chicken nuggets. They're not for me, they're for my wife. I wouldn't eat this unhealthy crap."
"Off the record, I don't blame you," the clerk said. When Vegeta was less-than-amused, he tallied up the bill. "That's five dollars and sixty-four cents, sir."
"What outrageous prices!" Vegeta exclaimed as he handed over several dollars.
"Thank you, sir," the clerk said as he handed Vegeta's change back. "One order of Chicken McNuggets coming up!"
Vegeta walked over to a table and sat down. He noticed the manager eyeing him suspiciously.
"Hey," the manager said to the clerk. "Do you know who that is?"
"No," the clerk replied. "Who?"
"That's Vegeta!"
"Huh?" the clerk asked.
"Vegeta!" the manager said again. "The guy that tried to blow up Earth several years ago. I won't have that piece of alien trash in our restaurant!" The manager promptly stomped over to Vegeta's table. Vegeta looked up with a glare.
"Can I help you?" Vegeta asked in a tone mocking that of the employees.
"Are you Vegeta?" the manager asked.
"So what if I am?" Vegeta said.
"I'm going to have to ask you to leave," the manager continued.
"I'll leave when I get my food," Vegeta said, not moving a muscle.
"Get out... now," the manager said.
Vegeta looked at him as he grabbed him by the shirt collar. "I said I'll leave when I get my food!" Vegeta yelled.
The clerk at this time produced a shotgun from behind the counter. "Let him go!" he announced.
"What is this?" Vegeta asked. "What kind of a restaurant are you running?"
"Just get out..." the manager said. Vegeta pitched the manager off to the side, ran over, and took the gun away from the clerk, and broke it over his knee.
"How pathetic," he said. He grabbed the clerk and heaved him through the front window. The manager ran back to the kitchen.
"Get him!" the manager yelled to the cooks. Three of them advanced toward Vegeta.
"You people certainly are stupid," Vegeta said. "Taking on the prince of the Saiya-jins like this." He grabbed one and tossed him into a table. The next he threw into the ice cream machine, covering him in ice cream. The third ran away and hopped through the drive-thru window.
"Now for you!" Vegeta said as he glared at the manager.
"Oh no you don't!" the manager shouted as he opened the door to the freezer. "You're more trouble than that green guy!" He then ran into the freezer.
"Green guy?" Vegeta asked himself. "Could that be Piccolo? He has been missing for a few days. Oh well, I guess I'll find out soon enough. This idiot just ran into a dead end." Vegeta flew off toward the freezer.
Upon examining the freezer, Vegeta found that it was not a dead end at all, but that there was a secret passage. Vegeta entered and walked a little ways into what seemed to be a dark, dank dungeon passage.
"Damn," Vegeta said. "Why do I always have to get in these stupid situations? Why doesn't this kind of crap ever happen to Kakarott?" He trudged on until he came to a door. At first he thought about not opening it, but then he heard some sounds from the inside.
"Hmm..." Vegeta thought aloud. "I might as well go inside." He blasted the door off and saw Piccolo inside a glowing cage.
"What on Earth?" Vegeta asked.
"Vegeta? What are you doing here?" Piccolo asked. "Eh... doesn't matter. The manager locked me in this cage. It captures and stores any energy blasts I try to hit it with. The control panel is on the wall."
Vegeta thought for a moment whether he should let Piccolo out or not and how either way it would help him. Finally, since he was determined the kill the manager for cheating him, he decided to let Piccolo out since he might be familiar with the manager's tricks. He walked over to the control panel and pressed a few buttons. When that failed to produce any results, he pressed a few more. Nothing happened, so he finally ended up blasting it. The cage seemed to be drained of energy.
"Finally," Piccolo said as he blasted some of the bars out of the way. "Now I'm going to get that manager! Somebody's gonna pay!"
"Correction," Vegeta said. "I'm going to get the manager. I suppose you can come along if you like, though it really makes little difference."
The two left to continue down the hallway. Finally they came to another door, only this one was a large iron gate. Vegeta yanked it off of the hinges with little effort, smirking at Piccolo. Piccolo smiled back, following Vegeta in.
"What the-?" they both said in unison as they saw an elevator. "It looks like... an elevator..." Piccolo said.
"I can see that!" Vegeta said, examining it more closely. "It is an elevator... but why?" Just that time, a huge beast looking like a giant centipede came up from behind Piccolo. Piccolo jumped forward and turned.
"The hell?" Piccolo asked as he looked at Vegeta. He jumped out of the way just before the monster raked a claw at him.
Vegeta grinned, then flew in close and began beating on the monster's "face." It didn't seem to have any effect as the monster swatted Vegeta out of the way. Vegeta hit the wall and fell. Piccolo blasted a beam at it's face, which also seemed to have little effect. It stood up over the two warriors and let out a ferocious roar.
"That's it!" Vegeta exclaimed. "It's skeleton is hard as a rock, but we can attack it's belly!" Vegeta shot a blast knocking the creature back. Piccolo acknowledged this and let loose another blast which knocked the creature back some more. He grinned once again and flew at the creature's exposed underbelly. Piccolo wasn't far behind. They entered its abdomen and plowed through it as it screeched in pain. Vegeta emerged covered in muck and grinned. Piccolo also emerged and flew to the top of the room.
"Looks like it's time..." Vegeta began. "For you to go... TO ANOTHER DIMENSION!" He promptly yanked the weakened beast's head off and shot a blast down it's throat, nearly incinerating it. "Hmph," he smirked.
"Well, that was easy," Piccolo said. "Now let's see where this elevator goes." He went up and pushed the up button, the only button there, and shortly the elevator opened. He and Vegeta got in and pushed the button for the top floor. They waited, and before long the doors dinged back open.
What they saw was a huge office building with suits walking around everywhere. They noticed the secretary, who was being hit on by the very man they were chasing, the manager of the McDonald's! He noticed them and sprinted into another room. Vegeta and Piccolo set off after him.
When they finally flew into the room, they noticed that it was meeting of some type. About ten people in suits were sitting around a table, and Vegeta with his blue jumpsuit, Piccolo in his loose clothing and cape, and the manager in his McDonald's uniform looked horribly out of place. The man at the head of the table grinned.
"Welcome, Piccolo, Vegeta," he said. "I knew if I captured Piccolo, someone would come to save him. I hoped it would be Goku, or his son, but you're good enough."
"Good enough?" Vegeta asked in disbelief. "I AM VEGETA, PRINCE OF THE SAIYA-JIN! I AM THE MOST POWERFUL SAIYAN IN THE UNIVERSE! I AM NOT MERELY GOOD ENOUGH!"
"Settle down, Vegeta," Piccolo said. "It doesn't matter what these jerks think."
"You see," the man at the head of the table said, "My plan it to gather the world's greatest fighters and have them become slaves to McDonald's! And you will be the first since you stumbled here to rescue Piccolo!"
"Piccolo? I came here to get some chicken nuggets," Vegeta said. Piccolo grimaced. "And besides," Vegeta continued, "I'm no one's slave. Period."
"You don't really have a choice," the man continued. "You join us... or you die."
Piccolo and Vegeta both smirked. "Your power is weak," Piccolo said. "You'd be lucky if you could get off one punch before you were feeding the worms."
"Perhaps," the man said, "But my assistant is very powerful. Meet..." As he said this, a huge robot thumped into the room. "ED-209!"
"DROP YOUR WEAPONS! CEASE AND DESIST!" it said.
"Pathetic," Vegeta said. "Besides, he's the one I came for!" He pointed at the manager and flew across the room to get him. ED-209 began shooting at Vegeta, and Piccolo attacked it. Vegeta ignored it, since all he really cared about was getting to the manager. Once he had him, he tossed him out the window, and as he plummeted fifty stories, Vegeta final flashed him to the next dimension.
"Um, Vegeta," Piccolo said as he dodged ED-209's shots and punches. "A little help would be great."
"You're doing fine," Vegeta said as he continued to blast at the various suits who ran and hid. Finally Vegeta advanced toward the only one left, the man at the head of the table. ED-209 ignored Piccolo and advanced toward Vegeta. Piccolo hopped behind it and began powering up his Special Beam Canon.
"CEASE AND DESIST!" ED-209 said to Vegeta as Vegeta was roughing up the man, who was indeed the president of McDonald's.
"He's quite loyal," the president said. "Perhaps you should do as he says."
"Perhaps you should shut up," Vegeta said as he punched the president across the room, before blasting ED-209 and knocking him back. ED-209 stumbled a bit, then continued advancing toward Vegeta. Unfortunately for it, its advance was cut short as it was hit through the back with a Special Beam Canon, blowing it to bits. Piccolo grinned at Vegeta, who smirked back, then advanced toward the president.
"It seems your little scheme has been foiled," Vegeta said.
"What do you think we should do with this little punk?" Piccolo asked.
"I say we give him a one-way ticket to another dimension," Vegeta said.
"No, not that... please... we can cut a deal..." he begged. Vegeta and Piccolo ignored him as they both blasted him to the next dimension.
"Hmph," Vegeta said. "Pathetic restaurant."
"All I wanted to do was use the restroom," Piccolo said. "And now those stupid fools have lost their company. I hope they're happy."
"Who cares?" Vegeta said as he jumped out the window and flew off.
Piccolo looked around at the charred corpses for a moment, then flew off as well.
* * * * *
"Vegeta," Bulma shouted. "I'm glad your home! Did you get the food?"
"No, woman," Vegeta said. "It just so happens I had to fight for my life alongside that Namek."
"Piccolo?" Bulma asked. "What on Earth did you two do?"
"Hmph," Vegeta said. "They tried to cheat me. So I basically destroyed their company."
"Well," Bulma said, obviously steamed, "I can't let you go out for ten minutes without you destroying something! What kind of role-model is that for our son?"
"Silence, woman!" Vegeta said. "I'm a Saiya-jin warrior. I'm the prince of the Saiyans. If Earthlings insist on provoking fights with me, then they deserve what they get when they find I am invincible."
Bulma sighed. "What am I gonna do with you, Vegeta?" she asked. Vegeta had already walked off into the gravity room to train.
THE END!!
VEGETA JOINS BACKSTREET BOYS!!??
Rated: R
Vegeta is walking down the streets when he notices a huge poster on a
theater place.
It was a huge picture of 5 guys.
"Who are these freaks?" Vegeta asked himself.
Vegeta read the bottom of the poster.
BACKSTREET BOYS... PLAYING AT THE DB THEATER TOMORROW!
There was a little note at the bottom.
LOOKING FOR ADDITIONAL MEMBER.
"Hmm... maybe I can join and pound some sense into those freaks."
Vegeta said to himself, smiling with the left part of his mouth.
Vegeta goes up to the front of the theater, where there is a long line,
waiting for auditioning. Tons of girls were screaming, while lots of boys
were saying how they were prefect for the part.
"The hell? Why are there so many damned people here?!" Vegeta snarled.
Vegeta went to the back of the line and waited. After three hours of
impatient waiting, the line had only moved two people.
"THAT'S IT!! I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!"
Vegeta held out a hand and blew everybody into the "next dimension"
(killed).
Vegeta walked into the theater and saw the 5 humans named "BACKSTREET
BOYS."
"Okay, punks, I wanna join, and I wanna join now before I shove that
freakin microphone up yer ass!
"Um, oooookay..." the blonde-headed guy said, "I'm Nick, and this is
the rest of the group, AJ,Kevin, Brian, and Howie. And you are...?"
"I'm Vegeta, and don't you forget it or I'll make you regret it by
pounding your head into oblivion!"
The human named AJ whispered to the tallest member, Kevin.
"Um..." Kevin started, "You're Vegeta? Didn't you try to destroy Earth
once when fighting that one funky-haired Goku guy?"
"Yeah, so?" Vegeta snapped.
"Leave, now!"
"I'll leave after I perform tomorrow, you 40-pound wimps!"
"Fine," AJ sighed, "But we're gonna have to give you a makeover. You're
wearing battle armor! Your hair stands up! You look awful!"
"You don't look any better yourself, with all those tattoos and weird
glasses, you queer!"
The Backstreet Boys looked at each other and sighed, bummed that there
was no other choice. They let Vegeta audition.
Everybody got on stage as the drummers and recorders got ready.
"Dammit, these lights are too bright!" Vegeta said, teeth clenched.
"Just don't look at 'em!" Brian advised.
"Whatever. Uh, what are we doing again?"
"We're singing. A song named I Want it That Way. We're gonna sing it at
the theater tomorrow." Mark explained.
"SINGING? Damn! If I knew it was gonna be singing I would have blown
this whole place to ashes! Dang!"
"Just follow along!"
Vegeta gave Mark a mean frown as they began to sing.
"You are.... my fiiiiire! The one... desiiiiiire!!" they all started to
sing.
"DAMMIT! WHAT IS THIS CRAP?! ARGH!" Vegeta yelled in anger.
"Yo, calm yer jets, man!" Howie ordered.
"Are you telling ME, the Saiyan Prince, to calm down?! NOBODY TELLS ME
WHAT TO DO, SISSY!"
Vegeta's face turned red with fury as he raised up a single hand.
"BIG BANG ATTAAAAAACK!"
Howie D was blasted into nothingness.
The Backstreet Boys were standing in place, with their jaws wide open.
"Fine. Let's continue, you so-called heart-throbbing touchy-feely punks!"
"YOU KILLED HOWIE!!!" Nick screamed.
"Screaming is not for men, freak. Be a man, not a woman!"
Vegeta ran up to Nick and stuck a fist through his stomach.
"AARTCHHCH!" Nick gagged.
Vegeta removed the fist and pushed Nick off the stage, where he just
laid on the ground in a bloody heap.
"LIKE I SAID! LET'S CONTINUE!"
Shaken, the Backstreet Boys continued their song, goofing up after
seeing the sight of their two members being killed.
"Grrr... you're lucky I'm in a good mood or all of you would be dead by
now!"
THE NEXT DAY...
It is the day for performing.
Everything is set. The fans are cheering, but also wondering where Nick
and Howie are...
"Alright, everybody! ARE YOU... READY... TO ROCK!!!" Brian cheered.
"YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!" the crowd cheered.
"AND SAY HELLO TO OUR NEW MEMBER, SAIYAN PRINCE... UH... BECLEETA!"
Brian continued.
"Argh! It's Ve-get-a! Not Becleeta! Damn monkey!" Vegeta yelled.
Vegeta began punching the crud out of Brian, as the crowd was watching
and screaming NOOOOO!!!!
"And I don't wanna see yer ugly mug around here again!" Vegeta snapped
as he kicked Brian's beaten body then shoved him thorugh a stereo speaker,
where he was electrocuted to death.
"YOU KILLED HIM! GET VEGETA!" the crowd yelled, leaping out of their
seats, angry.
"Grrr.."
Vegeta raised a hand and blew away a small portion of the fans.
"SIT DOWN AND BE SILENT OR YOU'LL END UP LIKE BRIAN AND THOSE DEAD FANS
OVER THERE!!!"
Everybody sat back down and was silent. Lots of them were afraid.
"OK. 1.. 2.. 3.. GO!"
The remaining members, shaken and scared, AJ and Kevin, began singing.
"You are... my fiiiiire! The one... desiiiiire!"
All of a sudden Freeza in his 4th form burst through the wall and
everybody screamed.
"Whoa!" Kevin said.
"Get outta the way, mortal!" Freeza said as he powered up a Kienzan and
cut Mark in half.
AJ just stood there silently, trying not to talk or he might get killed.
"I don't like yer tattoos, crudbucket." Freeza said plainly.
"GAAH!" AJ began running.
Freeza lifted up a finger. "DEATHBALL!"
A huge fireball appeared and fired at AJ.
AJ was still running for his life. He looked back and saw the Deathball.
"AHHHHH!!!!!"
The deathball blew up and incinerated AJ.
"Hey! That was MY job, you gay freak! America can't even tell if your
a woman or a man with your girlish voice, and your weird lipstick! You're
probably both, you freak show!"
"Why you little..."
But Vegeta had already lifted up both hands and fired a Final Flash,
annihilating Freeza.
The fans still watched, frightened.
"What are you starin at, you cockless marbleheads!" Vegeta yelled.
The fans begin yelling as they tried to leave.
"GARLIC GUN!!!!"
Vegeta annihilated every fan, then went home.
"How was the audition, Vegeta?" Bulma asked.
"Don't expect any more new CD's from those freaks ever again."
Vegeta said, as he smiled his evil smile and entered the training chamber.
THE END
VEGETA BECOMING A POKEMON MASTER!?
Vegeta becomes a Pokemon Master
Vegeta ran, as fast as he could down Snake Way. "Hey,
Vegeta, wait up!!!" yelled his archrival, Kakarrot. Vegeta
smirked. "Yeah, whatever, Kakarrot. Try to keep up with the King
of Saiyajin!!!" Vegeta put on a speed boost. "Okay!!" yelled
Kakarrot as he flew way past Vegeta. Vegeta swore under his
breath. It went like this for days. Vegeta mocking Kakarrot, and
Kakarrot surpassing Vegeta. Then, one day, the two saiyans came
to a fork in the road. "Thats funny," Kakarrot said. "This wasn't
here before." As Kakarrot puzzled over the change, Vegeta took
off down the left path. Kakarrot reluctantly sped in front of
Vegeta, then disappeared. "Kakarrot?" Vegeta moved on slowly,
then fell. He landed in a grassy field. He looked around. A few
buildings stood a few yards away. Vegeta stalked into the biggest
one. Inside, Kakarrot and two young boys were gazing at a ball
they each held in their hands. "Hey Vegeta!" Kakarrot yelled.
"Professor Oak wants to see you!" "Who the hell is professor
oak?" The two younger boys stared at him. "You know, Professor
Oak," The one in the red baseball cap said. "Pokemon expert
extraordinaire." "What in the name of Frieza is a Pokemon?" The kid with
red
hair laughed. " Ha, Ha. Pokemon is what your quests all about."
"Vegeta!" The Saiyan turned around. An old man with a ball in his
hand stood at the door. "Good morning Vegeta. I'm Professor Oak.
Pokemon expert extraordinaire." "I don't care who the hell you
are, all I want is to get back on Snake way." "Vegeta, you'd
better care. The only way to get back on Snake way is to catch
all 151 pokemon, and not kill any in the process. You must also
collect all 8 badges and beat the elite 4." "Damn." "Come with me
Vegeta, you have much to learn about the world of Pokemon."
Reluctantly, Vegeta followed Professor Oak. In Oak's lab, Vegeta
learned all about the world of Pocket Monsters. When he had
learned everything, Oak handed him a pokeball. "This contains
your starting Pokemon. Its name is Pikachu." Vegeta threw the
ball. A cute mouse like critter with red cheeks popped out. "No
way!! I am not going to train such a cuteass pokemon!!" He
obviously had insulted Pikachu, because the rodent yelled,
"PIKAAAAAAAAACHUUUUUU!!!!!!!!" and electrocuted Vegeta. The
saiyan got really pissed and a glow formed around him, making him
go SSJ2. "YOU DAMN RODENT!!!!! HOW DARE YOU SHOCK THE KING OF ALL
SAIYAJIN!!!!!!!!" "Chuuuuuu..." Pikachu got really scared as
Vegeta planned to send it into the next dimension, but Oak
stopped him. "Remember, Vegeta. If you want to get back on Snake
way, you have to train and LOVE this Pikachu." Vegeta swore agin,
grabbed Pikachu by the tail, and dragged it to where Ash, Gary,
and Kakarrot waited. "Hey, Vegeta!" Kakarrot yelled. "Want to do
battle with me?" "Sure. Pikapoo, or whatever your name is, you'd
better kick Kakarrot's sorry a**, or you'll be running down snakeway
with us." "Pika!" "Okay, then. Charmander, Go!" "Pikashmu!
Electrocute it! Give it that Thundershock attack! Kick that
Lizard's a**!!!" "Charmander! Ember, now!!"
"PikapikapikaCHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!" "Ha,Ha, Kakarrot. Looks like
my cuteass Pikachu beat that ugly Flametail of yours." "Hey,
spikeyhair," Gary said, "How about trying your luck on my
Squirtle?" "Sure, why not. Pikachu, zap that thing into another
dimension! Thundershock!!!" PIKACHOUUUUUUUUU!!!" "Squirtle,
Return!! Darnit, spikeyhair, you won." "Ha, ha, now get along or
I'LL send YOU to another dimension if you make fun of my Saiyan
hair." "Right." Ash Ketchum stepped up to the golden haired
saiyan."I am Ash Ketchum of Pallet Town. I declare to the Pokemon
of the world that I will be the greatest Pokemon master... Of all
Time!!!!!" "Yeah, whatever, kid. My son could beat you in a
second." "you have a son?" "Yeah, and a daughter too, and if you
make fun of them, Trunks'll kick your wimpy a**, get it?" "Whatever,
let's battle." "Fine with me. Pikachu! give this sorry excuse for
a kid a lesson!!" "Alright, Bulbasaur, I choose you!!" "Pikachu,
let's show this little saiyan look alike what a battle is really
about! Thundershock, Now!!!" "CHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!" "Bulbasaur,
give that rodent a taste of your Vine Whip!" "BulbaSAURRRRRRR!!!"
Pikachu flew into Vegeta's face. "Why you little prick!!! You
hurt my Pikachu! Big Bang Attack!!!!!!" "Vegeta!" Kakarrot
grabbed him."Do you want to get back to Snake Way or not?!"
Vegeta gritted his teeth."Besides," continued Kakarrot, "your
Pikachu isn't dead yet. You can still win! Jeez' Vegeta!"
"Alright, Pikachu, give that ugly thing a taste of your
Electricity!Thundershock it again!!! Bwahahahaha!!!"
"PikapIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!""saurrrrr. . . " Bulbasaur
fainted. "Ha, you little fool. You should know better than to
oppose Vegeta. You're so weak, my four year old daughter, Bra
could kick your ass." "Trunks and Bra?!?!?!?" Gary andAsh burst
out laughing. "Since Kakarrot won't let me hurt the brats myself
...... Pikachu!!! Shock em' both!"
"PIIIIIIIIIIIIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!"
"Hmpf. Foolish brats." Vegeta slowly made his way to Viridian
city.
Two days and many battles later...
"Hey, Panzyboy!!! I challenge you for a Boulderbadge!" "OK,
Mr. Badhairday. Go, Geodude!!" "Ha! Fool. Beedrill, Pikachu,
Pidgeot, Attack!!!" "Hey, bud, if your going to use three
pokemon, Then Onix and Rhyhorn, Go!" "Pikachu, Thunderbolt,
Beedrill, Twinneedle, and Pidgeot, Sky attack, now!!! Kick this
Girly boy's a**!!!" "PIKACHUUUUUUUUU!!!!" "BEEEEEEEEDRILLLLLLLL!!!"
"PidgeOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!" Vegeta's three strongest
pokemon creamed Brock's pokemon. "I lost!!!" "Hahaha, girlyboy.
Never underestimate the power of Vegeta, Super Saiyan King!!!!"
Three months later...
Vegeta stood facing Indigo Plateau. He had collected all 8
badges and had caught all 151 pokemon. This was his final
challenge before he could go up Snake Way again. He entered the
building. Lorelei, Ice pokemon Trainer, Challenged the King of
saiyajin. "The match will be six on six, Got that, alien?"
"fine." "Go, Dewgong, Cloyster, Vaporeon, Jynx, and Lapras!!!"
"Alright, Pikachu, Mewtwo, Pidgeot, Charizard, Venusaur, and
Blastoise, Go!!! Cream this Nerdy B*tch!!!" "All of you!
Blizzard!" "Pikachu, Thunder, Pidgeot, Sky Attack, Mewtwo,
Psychic, Charizard, Fire Blast, Venusaur, Solarbeam, Blastoise,
Hydro Pump!!" They beat Lorelei in an instant. Vegeta also beat
Bruno, Agatha, and Lance with ease. Gary was next. "Blastoise,
Arcanine, Exeggutor, Pidgeot, Alakazam, Rhydon, Go!!" "Everyone,
Go!!!" But Gay's Pokemon were too much for Pidgeot and Charizard.
They died, and Vegeta ordered his Pokemon not only to Cream
Gary's Pokemon, but Gary as well. "CHUUUUUUU!!" "BLASSSSS!!!"
"SAUUUURRRR!!!" "MEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWW!!!" Vegeta, having defeated
Gary, moved on to Kakarrot. "Charizard, Weezing, Mew, Aerodactyl,
Gyarados, Electabuzz, Go!!!!!!!!" Vegeta flung his remaining
pokemon out, but Mew killed Mewtwo, and poor Venusaur got burnt
to a crisp. But Blastoise and Pikachu were able to defeat
Kakarrot, so Vegeta moved up one notch to his final challenge:
Ash Ketchum. "Ha, ha, ha. We meet again, my young warrior. I call
the match. 2 on 2." "Fine with me. Venusaur, Raichu, go!"
"Blastoise, Pikachu, Kick this bastard's ass!!!" Blastoise got
ceamed immediately by Venusaur. Vegeta had one pokemon left.
"PIIIIIIKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!"
Pikachu used thunder. It killed Venusaur, but Raichu wasn't even
scratched. "Haha, Raichu, Fuse with Scyther and kill this cute
ass Pikachu!!!!" Raither jumped up and killed the Pikachu
instantly. Pikachu's head rolled onto Vegeta's Boots as the
Saiyan yelled loudly and went SSJ3. "THAT'S IT!!!!!!!! THIS PLACE
IS HISTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Vegeta fired a high powered Gallet gun,
and Started to fly to a safe distance when he heard, "pikachuuu",
A small Pikachu clung to his leg. Crazed by fury, Vegeta actually
took out Pikachu's old Pokeball and caught the frightened baby,
just before Kakarrot and he jumped onto Snake Way as Pokemon
Island Blew up.
2 hours later. "Hey, Vegeta!" "What do you want,
Kakarrot?!" "Why do you still have that Pokeball? You could care
less about Pokemon!" "Vegeta took the thing out of his armor and
looked at it. "Well, Kakarrot, let's just say it's Bra's birthday
present. Bulma could get a shock out it anyway." He smirked, put
the Pokeball back in his armor, and took off ahead of Kakarrot.
Little did he know, another wrong turn would bring him down to
earth for another challenge. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
the end!!
VEGETA MEETS BARNEY! AHH!
Rated R
Vegeta and Krillen were walking to a studio where the Barney show is taped with Bra. Bra won a contest to be on the show. When entering the studio Bra says to her dad.
Bra: Thanks for bringing me to the Barney show Papa, im so happy that i'll be on TV
Vegeta: Whatever ( I'm gonna kill Bulma when I get back)
Krillen: Be careful man or Bulma is gonna fuck you up.
Vegeta: I'm scared of her.
They were starting to shoot the show and all the kids (including Bra) were getting to start the show.
Bra: I got to go start Papa ( and she runs off)
Vegeta( when Bra leaves): My life is a living he-
Vegeta was cut off by Barney, the big purple gay dino himself, who came up to him and said in his gay voice.
Barney: ahaha Hello there little buddy.
Vegeta turns his back on him but Barney follows him around.
Barney: Who's your favorite dinosaur?
Vegeta( pissed): Don't touch me.
Krillen: Calm down
Barney: What's wrong? I know how about a great big group hug.
Vegeta: Don't even think about i-
Before Vegeta could finish, both he and Krillen are being hugged by Barney.
Barney: Now you feel all good inside.
Both Krillen and Vegeta had enough and both punched Barney right in the face. Krillen was pissed because he was hugged as well.
Krillen: Fuck off, bitch.
The two are about to walk away when Barney says something.
Barney: Goodbye (under his breath) you stupid shits.
Vegeta (turns around pissed ): I heard that.
Barney: Heard what?
Krillen: Forget about it Vegeta. Let's just get Bra and go home.
Vegeta: You are so fuckin luckey he's here to stop me.
Barney: Goodbye you goddamn pussy.
Vegeta (turns SSJ 1): You die.
Barney and Vegeta start fighting. Vegeta is laying alot of good punches but Barney keeps coming. Krillen grabs a whiffle bat from the props and beats Barney over the head with it. Barney goes down and Vegeta and Krillen start to stomp and kick him. Barney is about to killed or sent to another dimension until two women's voices are heard.
Both: VEGETA. KRILLEN.
Both guys look toward the direction where the voice came from and they see their wives both very pissed.
Krillen ( scared): #18
Vegeta (scared as well): Bulma
Both: What are you two doing here.
#18: We came to see how you two were doing and we saw you both kicking the shit out Bra's favorite TV icon. Krillen go wait in the car and I'll talk to you when we get home.
Bulma: Same to you too Vegeta. I'm going to find Bra. I'll talk to you when we get home as well.
Both guys: Yes honey.
When both girls leave, Vegeta kills Barney and says to Krillen.
Vegeta: You know I actually had fun.
Krillen: Me too Vegeta. Me too.
The End
Vegeta goes to South Park
Rated: R
One day Vegeta was unhappily walking home with his 7 year old son, Trunks,
and Trunks's best friend Goten, who was six. He was so pissed off due to the
fact that Bulma had made him take Trunks and Goten to the "gay fuckin' ass
of a place" that he didn't watch where he was going, and fell into a sewer.
Being brave, Trunks and Goten followed. The trio got washed into a snow
covered ledge. Trunks said," Hey dad, I don't think we're in Chibukuu
anymore." "No shit midget, and you keep your mouth shut, unless you want to
feel the pain of the garlic gun." Trunks shut up. Vegeta looked around. They
definitly weren't in Japan anymore. The saiyan got up and found a sign. It
read, Welcome to South Park. "What in the name of shit is South park?" Just
then, a bus drove past and stopped a few yards away. Vegeta heard talking
from the bus. " GET OF THE BUS, YOU LITTLE PIECES OF SHIT!!!!!!!!!!" Four
kids got off the bus. "yeah, whatever, you bitchass," said one kid in a gay
looking hat. "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!?!?!?" "um, my sister's got a rash," the
same kid said. "OH,." The bus drove away. Vegeta walked up to the four kids
and looked down at them. One was a fatass, another was a girly prick, the
third was a gay fag, and the last was this dumbass looking one in a hood.
"Well, well, well," Vegeta said. "what do we have here?" "WE'RE KIDS YOU
DUMBASS
PIECE OF MUDDA' FUCKIN' SHIT!!!!!" "oh, really," Vegeta smirked. "Yaeh,"
came Cartman."You probly thount we were like, cheesy poofs or somthin',
cause yer hayar is takin' up yer brain space." Vegeta gritted his teeth. "Uh
oh", came Goten. Trunks came over and stood beside his dad. Goten followed.
"stop bitchin' about my dad." Kyle lauged. "That's your dad? And who's that?
your brother? God, weird hair must run in the family or something. I mean,
daddy has hair like some psycho rock star, your brother has hair like a
gayass lion, and your hair is purple!!!! Purple, god! You look like that
bitchass ricky martin who got a muscle job!!!"
Vegeta was enraged. " HOW DARE YOU MAKE FUN OF THE KING OF SAIYANS
VEGETA!!!!!!!!" He turned and used a big bang attack on Kenny, who was in
another dimension. Stan stared at the spot where Kenny used to be. "Oh my
god! You killed kenny!" "you bastard!" added Kyle. "Yuo will never forget
the king of saiyajin, Vegeta!!!" " Or his son Trunks!!!" The three remaining
kids looked from Vegeta to Trunks and burst out laughing. "Vegeta? As in
vegetable?" Stan said, laughing. "Ha,ha Veggie boy!" Cartman said. "And
TRUNKS???!!! As in undrewear?" Cartman lauged harder. Vegeta turned to look
at his son, who had tears rolling down his cheeks. "Stop!! I am Goten, son
of Goku, greatest fighter of all time!!!!" "Goten!?" Kyle said. The three
saiyans were really pissed off. "Lets kick some earthling ass," Vegeta said.
"Solid," said Goten. "Alphanumeric,"Trunks said, and Vegeta yelled at him.
"Didn't I tell you to stop watching that fuckass show, Reboot?!?!?!?!?"
"Sorry,dad." Stan, Kyle, and Cartman were now rolling over in laughter,
mocking the three Saiyajin's names. This really pissed them off, so Trunks,
Vegeta and Goten all went SSJ1 and kicked ass on South park.
Later, when Vegeta and Trunks came home, Bulma yelled at Vegeta for taking
so long. "JUST SHUT UP, YOU MOTER FUCKIN' BITCHASS PIECE OF SHIT!!!! IF YOU
KNEW WHAT TRUNKS AND I HAVE BEEN THROUGH, YOU'D UNDERSTAND WHY WE'RE
LATE!!!!!!!" So Trunks went to have dinner, and Vegeta stalked off to watch
T.V. When he turned it on, a familiar looking mountain appeared and four
Bitchass kids walked across the screen, talking about some weird ass people
they had just seen. Cartman yelled,"Ha,ha, Veggie boy!!!" It was too much
for Vegeta. He picked up th T.V. and hurled it against the wall."Fuck that
shitball show, anyhow." He stalked off to his room, vowing that if he ever
returned to South Park, he'd send every last gayass person and every fucking
cow into the next dimension...
There will be a part 2 to this story. just not finished with it yet
THE END!!
