You may have seen him : in a bottle at any local music event (usually these events take place at Stevie Ray's House of Wax Burger King (where he used to work) The H-Men hideout wherever punk CDs are sold nationwide

CHAPTER I

He's always been a little... "odd."

Yeah, he's the FREAK in the back.
(The other guy is Brandon O'Shea. He's a cool dude too. Who knows, he may be our next victim!!!!)
. . . By the way, this pic is 3 years old.

• He's been surrounded by oddness for years.

  Note:

  His sixth grade teacher was named Beth Barefoot.

• He has an illegitimate twin.

  Note:

• He's "sassy."

  Note:

  "..with skittles and sprinkles." (Don't ask.. you don't want to know!)

• He looks drunk even when he's not.

  Note:

• He enjoy's nearly every song that has the word "naked" in it.

  Note:

  The Naked Song (written by guess who?) A certain Lower East Side (L.E.S.) Stitches song..

• He also enjoys Tom Jones.

  Note:

  He seems to know all about "Satan on crack."

• He has a strange reoccuring black dot on the top of his head.

  Note:

  Daira Springer Her magic marker

• He apparently enjoys torturing plush frogs while wearing Ms. Potato Head's earrings. (Yes, he's quite a sick one!)

  Note:

• He has returned from the dead!

  Note:

  There's proof! His "chalk" (masking tape) body outline remains on the pub room floor.

• He's bilingual.

  Note:

  This is an assumption deduced from the fact he's in Latin. This can only mean Carl is a Latino governmental punk rock spy sent to corrupt innocent "Dumb Kids."

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  Exhibit B:

  Six Degrees of Carl...

• It seems that everyone in the world is somehow connected to Carl. Weird, but true. For examples, click here.

• Click here to see school photos!!

• He seems to have strange effects on people.

  Note:	This young man is obviously a little scared of Carl.	Look at the disqust on her face!	Another innocent bystander, caught off-guard by Carl.

  How can Carl even try to compare to this All-American photographer?

  "Punk kid!"

  It looks as if Carl has gotten on this guy's bad side..

  The poor girl forces a smile while she ponders 'what could have possibly made this boy into the psychopath he is today?'

  This young man seems to share her thoughts.

  "Entertainment editor! Hmph!"

  Just look at that expression. No caption necissary.

  "Does his mother know he hangs out with Brandon O'Shea?"

  "I wonder if he's into baseball?"

  Yes, even our state representative, Mr. David McIntosh finds the boy a little odd.

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  Exhibit E:

  Carl's Hair Phases..

  • Witness Carl's hair phases.. (Between this and the school pics, it almost makes a girl feel guilty.. almost.)

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  Exhibit F:

  The Interviews...

  • Interviews with Carl.

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  Exhibit G:

  The Piglet Conspiracy...

  • CARL BYERS AND PIGLET... SEPARATED AT BIRTH... CLICK HERE FOR THE SHOCKING TRUTH!

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