FROM SIM WITH VICKIE AS HOBBIE, SHELONEI AS DOC

He stooped down beside her, his hand resting on her cheek. His eyes would not leave hers. "I've loved you for so long. You can't imagine the pain I've been going through."

The hauntedness in her eyes caused them to seem dim. "I think I can...." she whispered.

His thumb lightly traced her cheek. "Tell me what to do. All I want is you."

A second tear followed the first, "I don't know...." she said quietly.

Leaning forward, he kissed the tear away. "Please don't cry, my sweet Amanda."

She bit her lip, "I can't help it."

"What is causing you to cry," he asked as he sat back to look in her eyes again. "Is it something I've done?"

She shook her head, "no.... I just..." she shrugged. "I don't know!"

"There must be something," he said quietly. "Are they tears of pain?"

"I guess... maybe."

"I want to take that pain away, but I need to know what it is." His hand gently caressed her face, his thumb brushing across her cheek.

"I don't even know!" she was frustrated, and it showed through her voice.

He chewed on his lip a moment. "Is it Ton?"

She closed her eyes as tears slid from them, "I'm sorry," she said quietly.

He sat up on his knees and pulled her to him. "It's ok." He held her tightly.

She clung to him as she wept, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..." she whispered over and again.

He tried to comfort her. "Don't be." He was suddenly at a loss of what to say or do.

As they did every night, her weeping died down to sniffles and shuddering sighs. Yet, she did not pull away, comfourtably wrapped in his arms as he sat up before her and she leaned down to him.

"I... I only want to understand," he said quietly.

"Me too...."

He stood, sweeping her into his arms, trying not to jar her ankle, and took her to the bed. Gently, he lay her down, then sat beside her. He brushed her hair back from her eyes.

She brought up a hand to catch his. "Stay with me..." Her eyes pleaded as she spoke uncertainly, quietly.

He froze and his hand clasped hers. "As you wish," he said quietly.

The remnants of a smile appeared on her lips as she closed her eyes, and pressed his hand to her cheek.

He let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. "I need to tell you..."

Her eyes flew open, and the smile disappeared as a look of worry.... and fear, flitted across her face.

"No... it's nothing wrong. I just wanted to apologize... for that little 'prank' Wes and I pulled."

She looked away, turning her head to the side. "Please... don't talk about that...."

"I... I only did it to get close to you. I've missed being with you."

"We were together at the briefing...."

He nodded sadly. "I know, but I'm so afraid that something is going to happen and..." He paused. "I screwed up. Again. I'm sorry. I... I only hope you can forgive me."

She looked back to him, "I'll forgive you on one condition...."

"Name it. I'll do anything for you."

"Please... be patient with me? I need to figure myself out, I need that time to put myself back together...." I need time to mourn....

"Of course," he said with a nod. "But..."

She bit her lip. There's always a 'but', isn't there...?

"I need to know... can we be together?"

"I don't understand..."

His lips pressed together as he tried to think of how to phrase what he was asking. "Do I need to... leave you be while you figure things out?"

She looked very confused, and would have put her head in her hands had she not been lying down. Instead of answering his question, she asked one of her own. "Please, will you stay with me? I don't want to do anything, I just... I need to be with you."

Closing his eyes, a single tear escaped his eye and fell down his cheek.

She reached up to brush away his tear, one of her own falling, "Please, don't cry.. I'm sorry..." pain filled her voice.

"Don't be," he said quietly. "I'll stay. I'll do whatever you ask. All you have to do IS ask."

"Hold me... be with me.... Never leave me....I'm sorry..." She bit her lip.

"I will... I will do what I can."

"That's all I can ask..." she whispered, looking up at him.

He looked in her eyes, hoping she couldn't see his frustration. Leaning forward, he kissed her gently on the cheek.

She turned as he kissed her, bringing her lips to his own.

His eyes widened in surprise. The kiss was soft and sweet. Tentatively, he reached up to run his hand behind her neck and pull her closer.

She broke their kiss and huddled against him like a lost soul.

Suddenly, he realized he was still in his swimsuit. He held her close for a moment before breaking the silence. "I need to go change. I promise I will return."

"Please do..." she whispered.

He kissed her softly on the temple as he moved from the bed. "I'll be right back."

Quickly and quietly, he slipped from her room. Once in his own room, he threw some clothes on the bed and jumped into the shower. He set the water on its coldest setting.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, he finally got out and pulled his clothes on. Brushing his hair neatly back, he headed back to Amanda's.

Quietly, he opened the door and looked in.

She'd fallen asleep in exhaustion, with a slight frown on her face.

He crossed the room and sat on the bed beside her. Leaning down, he kissed her cheek. "I'm back," he whispered to her sleeping form. He pulled the covers up over her. A soft smile cracked his lips as he lay down on top of the covers, looking at her. "I love you, Amanda Anreson."

She turned over in her sleep and cuddled up against him with a sigh.

He sighed as well, wrapping her in his arms. "I just hope I can do this," he said to himself quietly.

********ENDSIM*********