WHAT A SHITTY MONTH

First to Inflict, Soulfood, and Downfind. Thank you for coming out to Chi-town to play 20 after 4 at Smilers. It was fun and we all got WASTED. Right fucking on.

Second to Headnoize Productions, nice job on Chuckstock. I had fun the few hours I was able to attend. All the bullshit paid off and I am happy things went well.

Third, to the Joliet police department. Thanks for beating up the poor kid who just wanted to have a good time. You made it worthwhile to show us why police fucking suck a dick and gave us more evidence to explain why. Serve and protect you fucks. Who is going to serve and protect us from you?

And finally to all the bands who participated in the Clash 4 Hash. It was a blast and fun, and we will overcome. (I am sure some of you are wondering what does that mean. Read below somewhere in my bitching segment this month.)

Let's kick some shit. September has been without a doubt one of the shitiest months for the Strictline and the Ranger. I am not about to cry on your shoulders. I am just going to blow my nose on them. He he he. Anyway here is the list of downfalls from the Strictline this month.

THE DAY THE SANITY DIED: no matter how many times I try to do a concert with this name, it gets canceled. First at the Filler Residence where the owners of the house decided it was too early in the year, second at the Wheeling Amvets hall because the budget did not allow for it, and now the Elks Hall of good old hick town Dekalb. Where no one really learns anything because I am sure their political, economic, education, and social systems involve the situation of two cousins going down on a couple of farm hogs. The city of Dekalb, teachers of NIU, priests and nuns of Catholic churches which probably preach bestiality and incest (meaning goats probably have human kids out there and they are taught to fuck mommy) all pressured the Elks Hall to cancel the show. It was bullshit because we found out a week before the show. Thanks for the notice ass munch. All because my flyer was too controversial for the town. Whatever man. You all oppress the youth because you know that everyone is smoking pot down there. You blame people like us for it. Well blame yourselves you slap asses because if you would help to make Dekalb a tourist attraction, people wouldn't party so much. Then again, who am I bullshiting? They still will. Oh well. I was so excited to work with Ballistic and Clockbox and ofcourse all my homies in Discord and Vis. Oh well you suck ass Dekalb, and do it well from what I hear so suck my ass bitch!!!

STRICTLINE ON WHCM: Well me, Kevin and Sheri got out of hand on the radio so we took a one week suspension due to our actions. Even though we had no one complain about our show, management heard it and decided we were suspended. I think it was because of the Womb being played. If anyone liked the Womb and wants to request it call 847-925-6237 and we will play it for you before 7am.

SRTV:THE STATIC EXPERIENCE/CLASH 4 HASH: This was by far an awesome taping and it is such a fucking shame we can't air it. I was suspended from the studios for 6 months because we went over a lousy half an hour. Yes it was my fault, but I know the bands involved went through great lengths to appear and I am not about to deny them the chance to play on television. Six months is not that long and the show may be on a brief hiatus for about a couple weeks. However, we are currently involved in making plans for continuing taping. Notice: the keyword is I was banned, not my crew, so keep watching kiddies. I am working on a plan right now to get the Clash 4 Hash video. We will keep you updated on how that goes. As far as the higher ups at AT&T go, two things. Have you have any kind of feelings whatsoever? So I made a little mistake. Big deal. And two, you cannot stop the Ranger. Don't ever think you can, the virus will live on.

CHUCKSTOCK: Once again, Joliet PD, SUCK MY ASS!!!

MERCURY INSURANCE: You can suck my ass too.

THE OLYMPICS: Who the fuck cares? More chances for corporate America to get ahead.

That is all for this month. Be sure to attend the next two shows MISSION:IMFILLADABOWL and THE HALLOWEEN CONCERT. I look forward to seeing as many people as possible at both, and to the guy who is sending my flyers to the village halls of towns I come to, get a fucking life. I can sell you one for $3.50.

Later and happy Halloween,
THE STONED RANGER