TALES FROM THE STRICTLINE

April 10, 2000

HELLO, HELLO, HELLO Harper College. Welcome to another glorious edition of Tales from the Strictline. To begin this, two things. Hey speech team. Way to go!!! You guys rock!!! Secondly, if you want to know what the Ranger did over Spring Break, you will have to hunt him down because if I were to write it all down, the Harbinger would be bingeing for another school to write for.

This edition I find myself walking around Harper thinking about certain things. You may or may not find yourself thinking about them, but hey let’s find out if great minds think alike. So anyways…

Do you ever wonder if the geese around Harper are going to start a student activity here on campus called "Geese Club."
Do you ever wonder if the art students are going to go on a murder spree because everyone keeps walking through the hallways they are trying to draw?
Do you ever wonder if the multi-cultural affairs club is going to start their own radio station since they like to express themselves upstairs in the SAC?
Do you ever wonder if President Breuder has a pack of girls in his office? I know if I dressed like he does, I would probably be scoring all day at school too.
Do you ever wonder if we had a keg at the ballot box of student elections, would we will make the College of Dupage student election look like a single person making a decision whether to go to the bathroom or not?
Do you ever wonder if Program Board started playing porn movies upstairs in the SAC, would Harper ask for another referendum to expand the SAC?
Do you ever wonder where Michael Neuman got his ear pierced at and if he has tattoos too? (It is a good thing, really.)
Do you ever wonder if people actually wash their feet in that little apparatus in the bathroom in building A, or do homeless folk take a shower there?
Do you ever wonder why there is always so much construction going on Algonquin?
Do you ever wonder why more people hang out in building L (Liberal Arts) then in the SAC? Maybe because there is a bookstore there.
Do you ever wonder why the bookstore charges way too much money and where does all that money go?

Yes Harper those are some of MY thoughts around this fine campus. Sometimes life can be boring around here. So if you dream up scenarios like these, life can be more interesting. Any thoughts you have you can e-mail to me at strictline@hotmail.com and I will cheerfully reply to all you have to say. Oh by the way, if I offended anyone. Lighten up and get a boy/girlfriend. Then use your imagination. So long my friends.

Take it easy, (and definitely sleazy),
THE STONED RANGER

Back