My Short Story

Ok, I wrote this spontaneously in an email to my friend, and I was using it for a "creativity vent"... enjoy...


I was in a beautiful place where there was beautiful flowers.. and a stream.. and the beautiful forest.. oh.. it was so.... uh... beautiful... and then I heard this faint noise.. it was so.. uh... faint... that you could almost not hear it... which means it was... uh... faint... it was so peaceful.. it sounded like birds chirping.. and I sat there and relaxed because it was so...uh.. relaxing... and then, as I was relieving myself on a beautiful patch of flowers... the faint noise grew louder and .... uh... louder.. and then, all of the sudden.. it wasn’t so peaceful anymore... it was... uh.. not peaceful... and then I looked... and to my horror... I saw.. yes.. I saw.... a Scottish marching band!!! they tore through the beautiful forest with their procession that took forever.. and they ripped down beautiful things that were so.. uh... beautiful .. until they ripped them down... and then, in my terrified state of.. uh.. terror... I quickly finished relieving myself on the beautiful patch of flowers... and ran away... I was in such.. terror.. that I didn’t realize that my genitals were stuck in my zipper.. until after, when I.... uh... realized... the Scottish marching band played on.. and on... and on... until suddenly... this man with a huge gun and a coonskin cap came swinging out of the trees, and then.. there was a loud crack, and then the sound of a deflating bagpipe... was it?... yes it was!... the bagpipe player assassin (wanted in 50 states, 678 countries, and one Dominican republic) had come to save the forest.. he took out tens, hundreds, two hundreds of bagpipe players, and ended the infernal humming of the instrument that sounds like "the nanny"... the world was saved from the.. uh.. infernal humming of the instrument that sounds like "the nanny"... by a rebel.. a crook.. and a sniper (all one person, not three different people)... the entire world came to that beautiful forest that day to congratulate, give thanks to, and arrest the bagpipe player assassin... and everyone lived in harmony for the rest of their lives, and they held a parade...with no bagpipe players... in the town gathering area (don’t ask which town.. I don’t know... for confusion's sake, we'll call in Shnotzkyville).. and they held a parade.. with no bagpipe players.. in Shnotzkyville.... a week after the bagpipe player assassin's trial and execution by electrocution.... to praise the end of bagpipes.. and to raise money for a statue of the executed bagpipe player assassin... and the world now lives in harmony, a harmony achieved by wind instruments (excluding the bagpipe), stringed instruments, percussion instruments, and keyed instruments... THE END

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Email: PaintedBlack007@yahoo.com