Diary2

Dear Diary,

Old Crazy Ann has decided that, since it seems like I will stay for a while, I better should get an own hut, because soon her honey would come back and they would have a lot of babies together. She said the thing with that her honey would come back at least one time a day, so I started to get an idea about why people titled her "Old Crazy Ann" She talked to Al, the mayor and they brought me to an old hut, that looked like no one had lived in it since years. "As representative of Brunkeflo I wanna offer you this wonderful home, so our population will grow one more time." Wonderful home? When the door got opened birds that had their nests in there escaped and some rats hided in their holes. "Well, I have to say that it will take a few days to make it ready, but if we all work together we can make it!" He looked so proud about this dirty old hut that I didn´t dared to say something against it.

"I will tell everybody that he has to help!" said Al. He watched over to an guy that was surely 2 metre tall and kind of slow moving. "Oh, I really got to introduce you to my son Herbert, we all call him Herbi." he said and went over to him. Old Crazy Ann whispered to me "Watch Herbi well, cause this is what happens when brother and sister have a child together." I watched her kind of shocked, but I watched Herbi very well. He not only slow moving, he was also a bit slow in understanding and talking, I didn´t had the feeling he was clever at all. He watched on the ground all the time and even though he was so extreme tall I morely had the impression that he would be like a child. I also noticed that he had only three fingers on one hand. After we left I felt very sad for him for beeing the way he was. When I looked back I saw him watching up from the ground and he slowly waved goodbye. One should NEVER have a child with his sister.

Dear Diary,

Did you know that sex is a good medicine when you have headache or feel depressed? I´m feeling depressed cause I have so bad headache :-)

The big cleaning-action for my hut has started and really everyone wanted to help. Actually Old Crazy Ann and Al had to throw some people out of the hut, cause it was so full that you couldn´t even see the ground cause there where so many pairs of feet, wearing dirty boots. So the ones outside made a big party with beer, whiskey and a big barbecue and they drunk a lot because as they said "It was sooooo cold.". But with every drink he had Al became kind of angry and I first didn´t understood why. He looked around and and when he didn´t saw what he was searching for, he gave his son Herbi instructions to lift him up on a table: "Where is Peter???" he shouted. All the people became quiet and watched around if he would be there. "Doesn´t Peter know about how to be friendly and kind? How dare he not to come to help getting our new citizen familiar with here?" he shouted on. The people where whispering with each other. "As representative of this town I say that he can´t do that and now I personally will go to his f*cking gold-mine and make him coming." If you ask me he was totally drunk. "Come on, Herbi" e shouted and Herbi took him on his bride shoulder and carried him all the way to the gold-mine. The other citizens followed him because they were so curious how this conflict would end up.

When Herbi arrived the gold-mine he lifted Al down again. Al went to the entrance and shouted "Peter, you son of a rotten bastard and a little bitch, come out here, if you are a true man!" It seemed like Peter wouldn´t be a true man and Al kept on screaming and hollering for 10 minutes. Than suddenly you was able to hear steps from inside. Peter came out and before Al was able to say something Peters fist knocked him out. I don´t know why but suddenly all the people tried to knock out each other. I tried to get out of this mess without getting a punch or any inner wounds. It would have worked, if I hadn´t stumbled over someone that was already laying on the ground. Some people stumbled over me as well and hit me with their feet this way some also steped right on my fingers, but I still tried to crouch out of this mess. It was a wonder that not any fingers of mine got broken. Finally I made it out of the mess and sat down on a rock to watch the other ones beating the hell out of each other. After most was knocked out they all suddenly stopped and they all laughed a lot about each other. Those that was able to stand helped up the other ones that were laying on the ground. If you ask me there was something wrong in their heads. They went back and made on with their barbecue like nothing had happened. Later this evening some citizens putthe tables together. I thought "What´s up now?" And than some guys with banjos and fiddles jumped on the tables using it as a stage. While they were playing they was stomping with their food so hard that I just could watch it fascinated and waited for any table to fall down. The people around me all started to dance. I had loved to dance with Jimmy but there was a girl after him all of the time. I think I hate her.

Dear Diary,

I was so busy today. My poor little body was still hurting from all the feet stumbling over me yesterday. But eventhough I cleaned everything that didn´t got cleaned yesterday, I fought with three or four rats and with male help I even survived attacks by this huge scary and hairy spider-beasts. Actually I runned outside and screamed whenever I saw one and anyone male came to get it dead. You know, I have an theorie about why looong time ago when the humans still lived in caves the woman allowed the mens to lie with them, and I don´t mean not only because of the sex or because they were hunters... No, because they are the only ones that can kill spiders without getting hysteric.

Tommorow I will try to get me furnitures. I´m so, so tired...

P.s.: Al did not remember what happened with him yesterday and why his eye was all black. The whole town decided not to tell him, because it would embarass him that "the representtive of Brunkeflo" caused such a ugly story...

Dear Diary,

The people here are so sweet to me! When they heared my hut was ready everyone that had any old furniture, that they didn´t need, brought it there and made it me as a present. The only thing I didn´t had was a bed, but everyone said it isn´t a big difference if you sleep in a hill of hay or a bed. I checked it out and IT IS a difference. But I will have to take what I can get until I have an own bed. And I swear that I will get one even if I have to spend my last money on it.

Dear Diary,

I moved in the hut and I got to tell you: Hay is not as soft as you might imagine it, don´t belive if someone says it was. It morely is like sleeping on nails. Brrrr... I really, really should get me a bed!!! So now I´m finally in my hut and it is very cold when you wake up in the morning and your oven isn´t on... I prefer electric heaters, you can belive me. It is much more nicer just to move an button and it gets warm, than sitting in your night dress in front of the oven and try to get a fire burning. But after all I found my big passion for fire while I starred in the flames. It was almost to late for me when the room filled more and more with smoke, because I didn´t close the oven-door, but before I fainted I was able to open the windows and get some air. I think I´m a pyromanic.

For the first time in Brunkeflo I went to the market to get me my own food and I also went to the little shop which they had. I hadn´t taken it´s name "Rotten Joey´s" serious if it hadn´t been the most rotten shop in the world. all this wholes on the ground, which was dark-brown, caused by all the tobacco which was spit on the ground. I bought myself a petrol-lamp and ome petrol and also some milk, butter, bacon and bread. I made myself a nice breakfast and when it was lunch-time I tried the unbeliveable: Cooking on a oven!!! It is a hard job when you don´t have an idea about it. But I finally made it. Ok, the steak I made was just a piece of coal in the end, but I was richer on experience.After all it seems that I learn something new with every day. I could be in Sillicone Valley now and I could take a nice, nice bath. To take a bath here you have to carry very much water from the lake, that is 15 minutes away by feet, to my hut, make it warm on the oven and than you can put it in this big wooden pott. It is too cold to swim in the lake, I start to understand why people are so dirty here, but I promised to myself that I won´t become like them. No, no no.

But when I think of it, Jimmy is from here as well and I would give everything if I could change him to kind of "civilised" man and make him liking me.

Dear Diary,

today I feel totally, absolutly ill. My throat is hurting when I try to talk and I seem to have a bad, bad cold. They don´t have a pharmacy here, so I just stayed in my bed and hoped it would get better soon. I really had to fight with myself to get me out of my bed to get the oven on again. It was so f*cking cold!!! You wouldn´t belive it. It was even harder to go to the out-door-toilet (you know, they don´t have them inside, they have them outside in this little toilet-houses. As you can imagine they are not very clean and you really got to come over yourself to go there. I never went there at night so far, cause I was lazy and kept myself back all night through)

I was not hungry at all but in the evening I forced myself to eat a little. This really WASN´T my day, you can belive me!!!

Dear Diary,

You wouldn´t blive what happened today. I was ill and I laid in my bed with a red nose and unwashed hair and I looked awfull anyway and everything and guess who came for a visit?! JIMMY! Oh shit!!!

He came to tell me that he had talked to Peter and that Peter wouldn´t watch my car under any circumstances since he wasn´t an expert about that anyway. All of the time I just thought "Oh Shit, oh shit, the sweetest dirtry thing in the world is here and Iam so ill!!! He was sitting on my bed all of the time why he told me so. Than he asked me "Are you ill???" And I answered him that I surely was. Since my oven was off one more time he stood up and put it on again. He was able to do that much more faster than I was able to, probably cause he lived here since a longer time?!

After all he stayed for a while but we didn´t found anything to talk about. When it got silent for a too long time I asked him people what call Old Crazy Ann "Old Crazy Ann". "Well, long time ago, before I was even born there was a guy coming to town and he also went to the saloon, where Ann was working as a waitress and they totally was falling in love for each other. Anyway: He had to go away some day and he promised her to come back to her and marry her if she is waiting for him. No one knows what happened, but he never came back. But Ann she is waiting until today so he comes back." I thought about it and it explained me why she always said her honey would come back and mary her. "So she never got married or got children because she waited for him to come back?" I asked. "Yes, that´s right." Jimmy answered to me. "A sad but very romantic story." I said, than I took my whole braveness together and asked him "How about your romantic stories?" He watched up on me surprised than he answered "No romantic stories at the moment. How about you?" I felt like a stone was falling from my heart. He was single!!! "I wanted to go to Silicone Valley and find me an millionaire there." I answered. "Sillicone...what???" I wanted to explain what it was, but I didn´t knew how to explain that to someone that does not even know what a computer is... Than he stood up and said it was time for him to go. A pittypittypitty.