Thought you knew everything about our posh Kula Shaker chum? Well, think again....


Crispian was born on Jan 18, 1973 to Hayley Mills, a famous 60's actress.

He claims to be 6'4" (Turn the numbers round the other way and you might be about right', says a doubtful Jay Darlington, the Shaker's organist ) and weighs nine stone.

Crispian used to work for Harris, the people who do the electoral polls. He was a market reseacher.

He describes his job as being "Robin Hood with the truth". Eh?!?

His earliest childhood memory is of Nelson's Column. ("But I was a non-writing puppy then!" growls Nelson)
"I just remember going around it in a car." ("What on earth are you talking about fella?" -Nelson)

The first poster he ever put on his wall was of 80's group Madness. "It came a magazine called Look In and on it, they were all posed on top of each other, in these big black jackets. I put graffiti coming out of their mouths in speech bubbles.

His co-shaker, drummer Paul Winter-hart, describes Crispian as "hardworking, charming, schizophrenic, trying - he is very trying - and surprising. He surprises you with good and bad things."

The last record Crispian bought was Harvest, a 1972 album by old hippie troubadour Neil Young. He can't remember the title of the first one he bought. "I remember thinking it was crap, but that went for every record in the 80s."

When asked whether he thought he was sexy, Crispian said,"That depends on how sexy you consider a big bag of blood and pus and urine to be. That's all bodies are, isn't it?" Urghh!

"I've got a criminal record as long as my arm," boasts Crispian. "I've committed petty psychic harassment of drummers and policewomen!" Barmpot alert!

He claims not to possess any talent of his own. "I'm just a vehicle for higher forces." "Yeah, an E-type Jag on some days and a Mini Cooper on others." says bassist Alonza.

He gives his unwanted clothes to Paul. "The last thing I gave him was a Michael Hutchence jumper - the sort of jumper you'd wear to hang out with Paula Yates."

He likes the Johnny Depp film Dead Man. "It's not often you get films like that - with William Blake (famous mystic poet) and Red Indians. You used to get loads!"

It's rumoured that Crispian has a wife whom he married in an Indian ceremony a couple of years ago. "I am married - to the Lady of The Lake." says Crisp.

He's a funny devil and no mistake.