Kevin opened the closet door in his bedroom and ducked just before a basketball smacked him in the head. He laughed and started digging around inside the closet, looking for the inflatable beach ball he knew was hidden in there. Everyone was currently gathered around the pool, and Brian had asked for the beach ball.

“Aha!” Kevin said, finding it. It was deflated and folded tightly inside a plastic bag. He reached out to grab it and his hand hit something solid next to it on the shelf. He paused, wondering what it was.

And then suddenly he realized he knew exactly what it was. Forgetting about the beach ball, he took the object, a solid cedar box with a tight fitting lid, from the top shelf of the closet and carried it to the bed. Very slowly, he sat down and looked at it.

He knew what was inside, what it represented, and he knew why he’d buried it and tried to forget about it.

He took a deep breath before he lifted the lid. The scent of cedar drifted up to his nose and he closed his eyes, remembering. After a moment, he looked down. Tucked inside were letters, pictures, buttons, ticket stubs. . .

It was all there, just like she’d placed it.

He leaned back against the pillows on the bed, trying to fight the tears that threatened to fall. The box rested in his lap, the little souveniers staring up at him, almost pleading with him to remember, to not be afraid of the memories. He picked up a folded piece of paper, recognizing his own handwriting.

“Claire” was the name scrawled on the paper. He opened it and silently read the poem he’d written over five years ago. Tears began to form in his eyes, and he quickly folded it up and set it aside.

Next was a ticket stub from one of their concerts. It carried a lipstick stain from where Claire had kissed it after he’d signed it for her backstage. She’d scored a backstage pass from a friend and was beyond thrilled to meet her favorite group. He remembered how gorgeous she looked that night, so radiant and full of life. He had to ask her out.

He ran a finger over his lips, remembering the taste and feel of hers on his. She had such a sensous way of barely touching his mouth, and yet consuming it wholly at the same time. Her kisses were like fire, and Kevin loved to be burned by them.

Still holding the ticket stub, he pulled out a strip of pictures they’d had taken at a mall in one of those little booths. In the first one, they were making goofy faces. In the second picture they were making angry faces. And in the third one, they were kissing each other. He remembered how she had to drag him inside and force him to look at the camera. He had needed to use the bathroom, but she’d seen the booth and steered him away from his original destination.

He laughed out loud at the memory.

Kevin gently placed the items beside the poem and looked inside the box again. A napkin from the restaurant he’d taken her to on their first date; a book of matches from the first hotel they’d stayed at together; a stack of pictures that had been taken at Disney World.

He flipped through them, smiling at how silly they all looked. There were Brian and Leighanne, playfully fighting over who got to carry the ice cream cone they’d bought. Nick standing on his head while waiting in line for Space Mountain and Howie attempting to get away from Daisy Duck before she could kiss him. Another one of AJ and Amanda, trying to be discreet while locked in a heavy make-out session.

Finally, a picture of Claire and himself, hugging each other and standing between Jasmine and Aladdin. He swallowed the lump that formed in his throat and set the pictures down on the bed.

A pink flamingo Beanie Baby poked his head out of the box and Kevin picked it up. Her favorite Beanie Baby. He’d thought for sure if she ever left she’d take it with her. But she hadn’t. She’d left it behind.

She’d left him behind.

Angry now, he rose from the bed and moved towards the window. He held the flamingo tightly in his hands, as though it were a lifeline. His mind was flooded with memories of her, of her beautiful chocolate brown eyes and dark blond hair cascading around her shoulders, her luscious lips, and her never fading smile.

He went back to the box and dropped the flamingo on the bed. He then picked up the tube of lipstick she used to write his name on her face the night of their show. He looked at the receipt for the tattoo she’d gotten on her back. It was of a flaming heart with their names inside. AJ had been pleased at the artwork.

All of these things he’d meant to throw away or burn long ago. He’d been close once, had the box with all its contents sitting in the fireplace. The match had been lit. But he just couldn’t. He ended up holding the match until it burned down to his finger. Then the box had gone back into the closet, where it sat quietly for years.

Until today.

He peered inside the box again and his eyes rested on an almost completely burned lavender scented candle. Claire would light it everytime they made love. It was barely more than an inch tall now, down from its original height of twelve inches. He guessed they’d made love a lot.

A flash of light sparkled at the bottom of the box and he reached down to pick up the mystery object.

He nearly choked. It was the gold and diamond watch he’d given her on their first anniversary. She had burst into tears and nearly knocked him over in her delight. She’d caused a scene in the restaurant, running around to show everyone. Sshe only wore it on special occassions, any other time it rested in the cedar box.

The box itself was a precious keepsake. Claire’s grandfather had made it for her when she was a little girl and she kept all of her treasures inside. Over the years, those treasures had been replaced with others, but there were still a few there.

Like a tiny, chipped teacup and a string of plastic rings from Cracker Jack boxes. Kevin remembered how much she loved her cedar box.

He remembered how much he loved her, and still did. They’d pledged their love in front of all their friends and family on a beautiful June day in Kentucky. She had kept one of their wedding invitations and printed napkins, both of which were in the box.

He couldn’t hold back any longer. The tears were rolling freely down his cheeks, dropping onto the lid. His tears reminded him of the rain on the day she’d left him. The day she’d said goodbye had nearly killed him.

If only it hadn’t been raining so hard that day. If only he’d been there to drive her to the doctor’s office, like she’d asked him to. But he was called into the studio to make some changes to a track he and the Boys had recorded, so she had driven herself. But the roads had been too slick, and the car ahead of her had spun out of control, smashing into hers, and causing her to roll off the road.

Kevin made it to the hospital just in time to hear her tell him goodbye, and not to blame himself. He did though, he blamed himself completely because he hadn’t taken her like he promised. Her injuries had been too severe, and the doctors couldn’t save her.

Tthe door to Kevin's bedroom burst open then, and in walked a little girl of four with her blond hair in pigtails, wearing a bright pink bathing suit. Kevin quickly wiped his eyes.

“Daddy, we’re waiting,” she said, smiling up at him.

“Oh, baby, Daddy’s coming,” Kevin said, walking over to her. He scooped her up in his arms and kissed her cheek.

“Unca Brian got scared!" she exclaimed. "He thought you were lost!”

“Nope, I’m right here, Kari.” He took her over to the closet and reached in for the beach ball. “Why don’t you take this back to the others, and I’ll be right behind you, okay?”

“Okay!”

He let her down and she took off running. He sighed and looked heavenward, wondering if Claire was watching over them.

She had left him that day, but not before the doctors had saved their baby. Luckily Kari had been all right, except for the fact that she was instantly motherless. Kevin was glad to have the others to help him cope with his loss. They’d helped him raise Kari, and were still helping him.

He went back to the bed and began carefully replacing all the items in the box. He closed the lid. But instead of taking it back to the closet, he left it there. Later, he would show Kari all the treasures of her mother’s. He would tell his daughter what a wonderful woman Claire had been, and how much she loved her and had fought so hard to keep her safe. He would tell her how much he loved Claire, and the dreams they’d shared.

And then he would give her the box. He would ask her to promise never to forget her mother. Even though Kari had never met her, he would ask her to remember her through her things. Remember her and keep her close, like he did, somewhere inside.