Lori's Stupid And Senseless Sayings

These are my friend Lori's stupid and sensless sayings. I'll be adding something like this of my own soon. Be scared..be very scared *L*

~Slippery floors, like banana peels, can be slippery

~I bet if a biker had a tatoo that read "I LOVE MOMMY", all the other bikers would laugh at it. I bet they wouldn't be laughing when they saw the size of Mommy's shotgun

~Never buy the cheapest unicorn. I may have reabies

~I've been told that little kids don't like scary monsters. I bet they like scary monsters that have candy bars

~Yellow and blue make green. Stale bread is hard

~I looked up in the sky and saw the snow falling and it hurt as it hit my head. No, it wasn't the snow that hurt my head, it was the crow bar my sister hit me over the head with

~I think a good book would be about a poor family that lived in Chicago and they were so poor, they only eat beans for every meal, and their toilet is broken

~If a street vendor asks you to buy a broken watch, don't buy it, 'cause it's probably broken

~A little bit of ketchup can make tin foil much more tasty

~It may be fun to trick little kids, but you won't be laughing after you trick the one that has magical powers and they turn you into a blob of yogurt

~Every Wednesday you should wear a cape because, every Wednesday from now on is Cape Day!

~I don't care! I like to eat raw hot dogs!

~Life can only be understood backwards, it must be lived forward

~I think it would be cool to have a second mouth, then when you're telling stories you can make sound effects

~Never call your boss a stupid #&$%#&!, he just might take it as an insult

~Papa smurf is a #%&$head

~If you ever find a penny that is so old that you can't even read the date, don't eat it

~Taking an elephant to a basketball game is fine, but if he eats nachos, I wouldn't sit next to him on the ride home

~Pardon me, do you have any monkey cheese?

~Smile! It makes people wonder what you've been up to

~Lines can mean many things...especially when they are shaped like letters

~Guns can be dangerous, much like burning stop signs falling from the sky

~October 23 is Mole Day

~Monday November 7th is National Chocolate Covered Soap Day.

~Lime Jello and Canned Dog Food mixed will produce a potion that will bring dead butterfly's back to life

Email: music_luver3@hotmail.com