It's a shame we didn't hold our second annual bonfire and bookburning. All over our country obscenity charges are being handed out like political brochures. Some charges have resulted in convictions, some have not. Apparently the wording of the law is vague. As a group, we missed an opportunity to perform a civic duty by becoming those "average persons" who set "community standards."
Some subjects are so loathsome to me I have actually burned a book or two to dramatize my feelings. I recently unearthed another condidate for the fire.
You will know I have lived alone too long when I confess to entering one of "those" stories. You know the kind--one that sells illustrated books on technique, along with manual and mechanical aids.
Feeling very uncomfortable, I picked up a book and thumbed through it quickly, hoping the clerk, who was busy in another part of the store, would not notice. Call me naive, but flipping past my eyes was a montage of words and ideas that had never been part of my experience, reading or otherwise.
The book gave a brief history. Old Testament. Ancient Greek practices. Where, how and why those practices spread. Influencing the young. San Francisco.
Hormones. Latency, suppression, resistance, manipulation, stimulation, dominance, penetration and response. Preventing disease.
Alternative techniques. Whips and ropes. Using methods that casual observers would not detect. Pinching to produce response. Heading (with its resultant flush). Injuries.
Natural targets. Dwarfs, groups, the broken and the dead. (And to think the book publisher wryly took its name from a word element meaning "straight!")
Names for apparatus I knew I had, but didn't know what to call. Why it is beneficial to rub your laburnum and what to do if you have a Quercus phellos. Uniform balls.
Horrified to find myself thumbing back with interest to "drop crotching," I gasped, "Enough. I could hurt myself."
Confused and overwhelmed, I left the store. I was both fascinated and repelled, wanting to know more and sorry I had learned so much. I felt a need for professional help.
If burning this book is not in our future, let's just ban pruning our trees and shrubs altogether, although the book, All About Pruning by Ortho Books, obviously did not recommend total abstinence.
Whatever we do, we must act soon.
