I love Bones.
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Constellations - Jack Johnson
I miss Gretchen so much my spleen hurts. My spleen! Do you know how much missing that takes?

Anyway...

I figured out why I don't blog any more. It's because I just e-mail Pip, Mip, and Chester with my weird little moments of thought. Them, or Eve and Jannette, two of my co-workers. But back to the triad... Who are Pip, Mip, and Chester? And are those their real names? Um, no.

Pip is Pip. She has a real name, but it makes her sound like a stripper instead of the House-watching tae kwon do black belt weilding computer dork that she is.

Mip is Male Pip. His real name might or might not be Tom. His real name might or might not be Betty. I'm really not sure. All I know is he's very flexible. How I know this will remain a secret.

Chester is actually a woman: Chester the Molester. She has the most nicknames, I think. Chester, Gretzel, Pot, Tiyen, Gretchen, Margaret... You were never a Stooge, were you?

Anyway, I e-mail these three instead of posting here, so you can blame them. Then I got the bright idea, post your e-mails! Wow, Laura, took you a while on that one.

Originally sent on May 5 (Cinco de Mayo - A Celebration of Mayonaise):

I'm sitting here eating my Cracker Jack and thinking of some things. I'm thinking my ass is killing me. As is the rest of my body. But I'm also thinking, why the hell is it called Cracker Jack? Is it some white person thing? And then I see that "Jack" is this sailor dude on the front of the bag. Okay. But why cracker? Jack is a white guy, is that why? There are no crackers in Cracker Jack. In fact, I checked the ingredients, which made me think even more because the first ingredient is... sugar, not popcorn. In fact, popcorn is the third ingredient, right behind corn syrup. So while I'm eating mostly popcorn, apparently I'm really ingesting two types of sugar. Great. But really, why the hell is it called Cracker Jack? I see it has a web site.

Okay, Cracker Jack history: "1896 Louis Rueckheim, F.W.'s brother and partner, discovers the process for keeping the molasses-covered popcorn morsels from sticking together. Louis gives the treat to a salesman who exclaims, "That's crackerjack!" "So it is," says F.W. Rueckheim, who then has the words trademarked."

Huh. There goes my white theory.

This site even includes Jack's funny facts: One ostrich egg can easily serve 12, but can take two hours to hard boil.

This leads to the question, who the hell is boiling ostrich eggs?

Later!
Laura

aka Curly, Kettle, Dugie, Lenscap

P.S. Has something happened to the world when Bones is better than House? And on more than one occasion?

And why are Robert and Holly and Luke all back on GH? Anna's coming too - this Friday! Guess the Style network decided to spring Finola for an hour or two. Maybe the world really is coming to an end. No, that would only happen if Genie came back, too. But I mean, Sonny and Emily? Although HYSTERICAL scene between Sonny and Ric as they discussed their familial connections (I'm paraphrasing Ric here - "Alexis is Sam's mother. That means Kristina and Sam are half sisters. And you got Alexis pregnant. And Sam pregnant. And if Sam's baby had lived, she would have been my... niece?" Niece and step-grandaughter, Ric!) COME ON! And need I remind everyone, Robin has had HIV for like 10 years?

I feel better.

Quote of the Blog
(a quote of the blog taken from another blog... is that incestuous?)

"Even if he had seen a frog, why was he getting his nice suit dirty looking under his car for it. Had he never seen one before, only had heard "frog legends"?" ~ TVGuy

To read the rest of this story, visit Greg's hysterical blog: TVGuy

Posted by Laura at 10:27 PM EDT
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