Q. Dear Jeanne:

My wife and I lived together for eight years before we got married, she was the one always pushing to get married. I am 56, she is 30, her mother was a diagnosed schizophrenic. She died 3years ago supposedly from an asthmatic attack. She attempted suicide 12 years ago,supposedly no inhalers were found in the house. My wife was of the opinion she could have prevented her death had she been there for a wedding,1500 miles apart.

She moved 15 times in 18 years and the time she spent with me was the longest time she had ever spent in one place, she repeatedly made the comment she had never been in one place long enough to make friends, when her mother died she made the comment when she received cards from our friends, she had a family she didn't know she had.

We raced sled dogs, after two miserable winters of poor snow and bad racing conditions she said she was done with the dogs and me. She had taken a forest tech job 75 miles from our home and was commuting on the weekends. I was responsible for her losing her self confidence. She made the statement, I woke up one morning and realized I was 30, not forty or fifty and I want to have fun.

We were watching a TV show about emergency rooms when she shut the TV off, went in the bedroom and started crying, I went in and asked her what was wrong, she said "that's the way my ma used to act" the woman was bipolar on the show .

I have read extensively on bipolar and personality disorders the past year.Is it past time for me to quit trying to help? Thank you

Nevin
nevin@nnex.net

A. Nevin,

Normally, I would say that anything is workable, even with these diseases. But I feel that through your words you already know that this is enough. You already feel that there is nothing else you can do and that you need to get on and create a life for yourself. I suggest you do this. We are only given one day at a time, no more, so live life the happiest and fullest you can. Good Luck to you.

Jeanne