The year is now 1902 one hundred years ago in 1802 the US stastics were:
1. The average life expectancy in the US was forty-seven (47).
2. Only 14 Percent of the homes in the US had a bathtub.
3. Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone. A three-minute call from Denver to New York City cost eleven dollars.
4. There were only 8,000 cars in the US and only 144 miles of paved roads.
5. The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 mph.
6. Alabama, Mississippi, Iowa, and Tennessee were each more heavily populated than California. With a mere 1.4 million residents, California was only the 21st most populous state in the Union.
7. The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower.
8. The average wage in the US was 22 cents an hour.
9. The average US worker made between $200 and $400 per year!!!
10. A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per year, a dentist $2,500 Per year, a veterinarian between $1,500 and $4,000 per year, and a mechanical engineer about $5,000 per year.
11. More than 95 percent of all births in the US took place at home.
12. Ninety percent of all US physicians had no college education. Instead, they attended medical schools, many of which were condemned in the press and by the government as "substandard."
13. Sugar cost four cents a pound. Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen. Coffee cost fifteen cents a pound.
14. Most women only washed their hair once a month and they used borax or egg yolks for shampoo.
15. Canada passed a law prohibiting poor people from entering the country for any reason.
16. The five leading causes of death in the US were:
A. Pneumonia and influenza B. Tuberculosis C. Diarrhea D. Heart disease E. Stroke
17. The American flag had 45 stars. Arizona, Oklahoma, New Mexico, Hawaii and Alaska hadn't been admitted to the Union yet.
18. The population of Las Vegas, Nevada was 60.
19. Crossword puzzles, canned beer, and iced tea hadn't been invented.
20. There were no Mother's Day or Father's Day.
What a difference 100 years makes
*Questions and Answers*
*Q & A*
Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 "Winter Olympics", the following are some questions people the world over are asking. These questions about Canada were actually posted on an international Tourism Website.
Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A:We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.
Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only four thousand miles, take lots of water.
Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada?
(Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?
Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North.. oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get there and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule?
(USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is.. oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, right after the hippo races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A: No, We don't stink.
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Canada? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A: Only at Thanksgiving.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A: It's called a moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
*TERRIFYING BUS RIDE*
Two bowling teams, one of all Blondes and one of all Brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City. The Brunette team rides on the bottom of the bus.
*Ya-Ya Sisterhood*
1) If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it will always be yours. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin with. But, if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money, and doesn't appear to realize that you had set it free....... You either married it or gave birth to it.
2) Reason to smile: Every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics
class pulls a hamstring.
3) My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.
4) The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.
5) The nice part about living in a small town: When you don't know what you're doing, someone else always does.
6) Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
7) Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.
8) Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes!
9) They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn't all that communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd you like to go to the six o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell my body said, "Listen fatty....do it and die."
10) I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding?
That's my idea of a perfect day.
*How to speak about Women and be politically correct:*
She is not a "babe" or a "chick" – she is a "breasted Canadian".
She is not a "moaner" or a "screamer" – she is "vocally appreciative".
She is not "easy" – she is "horizontally accessible".
She does not "tease" or "flirt" – she engages in "artificial stimulation".
She is not "dumb" – she is a "detour off the information superhighway".
She has not "been around" – she is a "previously enjoyed companion".
She does not "get you excited" – she causes "temporary blood displacement".
She is not "kinky" – she is a "creative caretaker".
She is not an "airhead" – she is "reality impaired".
She is not "horny" – she is "sexually focused".
She does not have "breast implants" – she is "medically enhanced".
She does not "nag" – she becomes "verbally repetitive".
She is not a "slut" – she is "sexually extroverted".
She does not have "major league hooters" – she is "pectorally superior".
She is not a "two bit whore" – she is a "low cost provider"
*How to talk about Men and be politically correct:*
He does not have a "beer gut" – he has developed a "liquid grain storage facility".
He is not a "bad dancer" – he is "overly Caucasian".
He does not "get lost all the time" – he "investigates alternative destinations".
He is not "balding" – he is in "follicle regression".
He is not a "cradle robber" – he "prefers generationally differential relationships".
He does not get "falling down drunk" – he becomes "accidentally horizontal".
He does not act like a "total ass" – he develops a case of "rectal cranial inversion".
He is not a "sex machine" – he is "romantically automated".
He is not a "male chauvinist pig" – he has "swine empathy".
He is not "afraid of commitment" – he is "monogamously challenged".
He does not "undress you with his eyes" – he has an "introspective graphic moment".
*Phenomenal Women*
I just couldn't risk to walk with my panties around my ankles ...
I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights
I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.
I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life."
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.
I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.
I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone.People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
Please send this to five phenomenal women today. If you do, something good will happen: you will boost another woman's self esteem. If you don't ....the elastic will break and your panties will fall down around your ankles :)
*BITCHDOM*
When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a bitch.
When I stand up for those I love, they call me a bitch.
When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my own way,they call me a bitch.
Being a bitch means I won't compromise what's in my heart. It means I live my life MY way. It means I won't allow anyone to step on me.
When I refuse to tolerate injustice and speak against It, I am defined as a bitch.
The same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of being everyone's maid, or when I act a little selfish. It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think I "should" be.
I am outspoken, opinionated and determined. I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that!
So try to stomp on me, try to douse my inner flame, try to squash every ounce of beauty I hold within me. You won't succeed. And if that makes me a bitch, so be it. I embrace the title and am proud to bear it.
B - Babe I - In T - Total C - Control of H - Herself
B = Beautiful I = Intelligent T = Talented C = Charming H = Hell of a Woman
B = Beautiful I = Individual T = That C = Can H = Handle anything
*Food For Thought*
* It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
* Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
* Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
* Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
* Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
* If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
* Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
* If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
* Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
* Experience is the sinking feeling that you have made this mistake before.
*The Old Poodle*
A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged poodle named Cuddles, along for the company.
One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovers that she's lost. Wandering about, she notices a leopard heading rapidly in her direction with the intention of having lunch.
The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep shit now!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, she immediately settles down to chew on the bones with her back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the old poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"
Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!", says the leopard, "That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!"
Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.
The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says,
"Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"
Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?", but instead of running, the dog sits down with her back to her attackers, pretending she hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says:
"Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"
*The Date*
Her husband came home from work. But she had been in the house all day and wanted to go somewhere.
"Honey, do you think you could take me out tonight, maybe somewhere expensive?"
"Sure," he said. Get dressed. So she took her time to look extra nice.
