Past Sports



Past Sports from the past week.

Past sports article for the week of 6/16/08

Former Candidates Head to Bejing!

By, Puns McKenna

Itís summer 2008 and the elections are right around the proverbial corner. Former presidential candidates from years past have decided that itís time to branch outÖtry new things. So what do you think theyíre going to do? Oh, youíre gonna get a kick out of this one. Former presidential candidates have decided to form an Olympic team.
What events are they going to participate in? Welll letís go by party. For the Deocratic former candidates we have the following group of folks. Joe Biden, Hillary Clinton, Christopher Dodd, John Edwards, Dennis Kucinich, Bill Richardson, and Tom Vilsack. Now the six brave men are going to participate in the Menís Decathlon. Mrs. Clinton plans to participate in the 3000m Womenís Steeplechase. Iím not sure if they have a geriatric decathlon or not, but they may develop one after this Olympic games.

A pretty impressive line up for the Dems, yes? Of course it is. But how many of them do you really think has the staying power to complete their events? And hereís another oddball question for you. How many of them will have people rooting for them? Now why donít we move on to the Republicans? This could get interesting. Okay, so the line up we have for the Repubís is as follows. Sam Brownback, Jim Gilmore, Rudy Guiliani, Mike Huckabee, Duncan Hunter, Ron Paul, Mitt Romney, Tom Tancredo, Fred Thompson, and Tommy Thompson.

Ooh now this should be rich! Letís take a look at what events these guys have entered into. Mr.ís Brownback, Gilmore, and Huckabee have entered into the 4x100m Menís Relay. Mr.ís Hunter, Guiliani, and Romney have entered into the 110m Menís Hurdles. The Thompsonís have entered into the Pole Vault and Shot Put events respectively. Mr. Tancredo has entered into the Long Jump competition, and Mr. Paul has decided to pursue a different vocation all together.

And we wonít even mention the 3rd party folks at all. No one even remembers who those folks are, right? Something about being a 3rd party politician means little to no exposure, and little to no recognition. So letís move on to the end here. I highly recommend watching the Summer Olympics from Bejing this year. It should prove very interesting.


 Really Pathetic Productions 1997-2008© Menu Bar by Albatross