Past Sports from the past week.

Past sports article for the week of 11/30/06

Turkey Bowling 2006
By, Grey Sports

As Thanksgiving closes and Christmas approaches the World Championship Turkey Bowling contests begin.
This year promises to be something special as other nations hold the United States and Canada to the “World” part of the event title and force the inclusion of other states in the event.
This should be interesting.
Long criticised for the use of the global appellation Canada and the US have long stated that it may as well be a world championship considering that theirs are the two primary turkey-consuming countries in the world, and thus the only nations with any great degree of turkey bowling experience.
Nevertheless Europe, Asia and several African nations have sent representatives to the contests, citing the proliferation of Subway sandwich outlets and an increased preference for their turkey subs as reason enough to compete.
The serious competition is a four way brawl between Seattle based Turkey Punchers, Ottawa team Dave’s All Star Gravy Train, Boston heroes Fowl Pluckers and surprise outsiders The Flying Turkeys from Vancouver, a line up that once again proves that most of the best turkey bowling happens along the border.
While the Turkey Punchers and Fowl Pluckers show consistent good performance The Flying Turkeys have shown stunning, if spasmodic, talent when the pressure is on, frequently managing strikes or even taking down seven-ten splits with careful bird handling.
Naturally with so many inexperienced teaks performing this year the blooper reels are expected to be the true highlight.
France and Britain are expected to offer a modicum of competition, though the tendency to use fresh turkey has had interesting splatter results.
Without specific rules regarding the state of the turkey most of Europe has assumed that fresh was best, whereas the Korean and Japanese teams have taken the time to hire Canadian consultants, and thus use frozen turkeys.
If the Asian teams have any particular problems it’s to do with the irregular weight distribution. American teams have long known how to tailor their throws in an almost intuitive manner that for some reason no other culture has managed to master.
There are some countries that merit serious consideration in the future. Rumour has it that Mexico may get involved next year, having less turkey experience than the US and Canada, though not much that it would make much of a difference.
Australia and New Zealand in particular have gained much kudos for the amount of enthusiasm they are displaying, even while skill eludes them. Much of it is based upon the shared attitude that they must excel in all sporting endeavours, however foreign.
Most North American coaches believe that one or two teams of credible, possibly even formidable skill could come from these countries in the next five years.
For now it’s just fun to see them marvel at the size of turkeys when they’re used to chickens and wondering where they’re supposed to put their fingers.
In the meantime Vegas is favouring the Canadian teams to win, continuing the trend of the last three years, with some predicting a strong showing from the Seattle group and the distinct possibility of an international hissy fit.


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