Past Opinion Articles

Article for the week of 10/16/07

O.J.: Sweet or Tart
By, Puns McKenna

Las Vegas, the city of neon lights and sin, is the scene of yet another crime. O.J. Simpson, the man most people forget was once a football star has struck again. Only this time it isn't murder, it's robbery. That's right, no one got hurt this time. Unless you account for the trauma of having a huge burly guy and some of his cohorts crowding you and taking your stuff. Sounds like a big bully to me.
Yep! That's all this was about… Stuff…Junk…Memorabilia. "But the stuff is mine!" I can almost hear the whine in his voice, can't you? Hey O.J.? Luke called; he wants his whine back.

Okay, so there were five guys involved here, O.J. plus four. Okay, so he wants his stuff back, or so he says. So rather than using the gray mushy stuff between his ears, he tries to brute strength it through another debacle. No bloody gloves involved here, but good grief, there might as well be. I mean really. This whole farce screams "I want attention" to me. Personally I think the man got used to the fame he got for the fictitious trial in 1995.

So what do we have here? Let's take a look at O.J.'s long and infamous career. First he's a football star. Played football till 1979. Retired from football and went into show biz. Then became an announcer for that sport he loved above all others. Then when it looked like his acting potential was petering out; he gets into the big time news with the charges that he killed his ex-wife and her friend; the debacle that made him infamous and made a mockery of the court system.

Now, years after the fiasco, he has managed to land himself in the spotlight again. This time the spotlight is orange. I wonder if her realizes just how deadly the desert is. I can just see it now. O.J. Simpson organizing football teams in the desert. Prison inmates versus the inhabitants of the desert. Let's see…lizards, snakes, jackalopes, vorpal Bunnies, and Coyotes. Yep, I think that might be worth the price of a ticket.

First Annual Robbery Bowl. Has a nice ring to it, no? It would certainly bring more money into Vegas. And everyone knows Neon isn't cheap. And I'm betting now, the memorabilia that Simpson tried to "take back" would turn a pretty penny on the open market. Might be worth it to sell memorabilia and give it all to the sports collector's that he apparently tried to rob at gunpoint. Turn about is fair play?

 Really Pathetic Productions 1997-2007©
Menu Bar By Albatross