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Past Opinion Articles
Article for the week
of 6/21/07
Confessions of
a Dislocated Texan
I’ve never felt so welcomed in all
my life
By, Paul Mann (editor and
punny guy)
It’s nice to know that there are still people out there to lend a helping
hand. When I left the great driving adventure of Texas I was a bit concerned
that things might not fall into place. Well, I was actually worried a
bit longer than that. Ok, I was worried the moment I decided to go to
North Carolina. I just wanted to make sure I could trust people so close
to water. (Not much of that to go around back home)
So, the wife and I packed our bags and decided we’d look for another Barney
Fife, since he was getting boring in the state of New Mexico. With my
degree well earned and only a minor eternity to wait for the actual piece
of paper; we nervously crossed the required number of state borders. Once
we arrived I was pleased with the reception received for a graduate and
a half. We were given a temporary place to live, food, cool weather, a
hippy turned organ player and free stuff to clutter the dwelling of our
initial hosts. With all these good times I was all too comfortable to
feel even more welcomed.
While we’ve been bunking with a most generous family I’ve come to remind
myself of the joys of trying to find a place to call home. It’s an everlasting
jubilation to be able to spend day after day exploring the fine rental
companies in our nearby area. Why my wife and I have been so blessed to
find places that require us to have several thousand dollars in hand or
a job that could rent three separate units at the same time. It just happens
that I’m related to some really rich relative and that will open his or
her bank account whenever we’re in need. If that lovable blood buddy could
just remind of their name, address and phone number we’ll move into our
modest living quarters in no time.
My wife certainly has jumped for joy since she gets to work in the ever
expanding world of retail again. Why for only several hours out of her
day she’ll be able to once again embrace the idea of supporting someone
else’s pocketbook. Just slap that brand name on her shirt and Mrs. Mann
will bow down to the best of naggers and rushed shoppers who think it’s
her fault for anything that could possibly go wrong. Heck, if she gets
bored there she might just dance for tips that might just buy us a pair
of socks.
During these hardly trying times I remember how easy it is for honest
people to get a break these days. It makes me pine for those times I’d
have to fight with a local bank or credit card company to start off my
history when a bankrupt neighbor got the best deals by just checking their
mailbox. I look back and smile on the easy periods where I could get a
bottom feeder job because I lacked the experience to ask if someone if
they wanted paper or plastic. I never complain when someone sneaking over
the border gets free health coverage because I enjoy not be able to have
it so much. Gee golly I feel better and better about my nation each day.
So here I am in the great state of North Carolina. In time I’ll settle
into an area where the pirates became bankers and where I can get all
the seafood I want without making a day long trip. I ready to welcome
you into my life if you wish to make me feel welcome. Who knows, maybe
NC and I will make quite a pair. It can’t be the strangest partnership
that’s ever been forged. At least we won’t be sold to Michael Jackson
like the Beatles.
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