Past Entertainment

For the week of 5/20/09

‘Sharks on a plane!?
By Cozmic

When someone names a movie Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus and releases it straight to DVD, you know what you are about to see is going to be absolutely fantastic. It is the kind of name which instantly screams out that this is a movie made to be as fantastic as possible, simply because it promises a “mega” shark fighting a giant octopus. How could it possibly be bad? Or, if you are of that other persuasion when it comes to movies, how could it ever be good?
Fantastical title aside, Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus is, well, a movie about a prehistoric shark, a megalodon, and an equally ancient octopus terrorizing the sea, the air (yes, really, one of the best scenes in the entire movie!) and even land a tiny bit. Unfortunately, someone decided the budget or human factor was too low, so rather than simply having shark and octopus scenes for two hours they had to try and tack on some human characters which don't get eaten after five seconds and also add some dialogue not entirely related to being consumed by a giant shark or octopus in the entire thing.
The good thing about this is that at least they picked actors who knew how to properly ham it all up just enough so one never feels bad about mocking it. Lorenzo Lamas (yes, the guy from Falcon Crest) makes a terrific performance as Allan Baxter, a Navy.. something or other, we're talking “wow, that's terrible acting!” shouts here. The rest of the characters, played by Deborah Gibson, Sean Lawlor and Vic Chao, don't quite make it to Lamas level, but to say the performance is good would be rather hard. Or maybe it is simply the incredibly bad dialogue and all the plotholes that are big enough for the aforementioned sharks and octopi to fit through.
This is all par for course, one would assume, just like the constantly reused clips of the shark swimming, because presumably the special effects budget, which must be the larger part of the production, is absolutely tiny. This is, sadly enough, the movies biggest flaw. There is simply not enough Mega Shark or Giant Octopus, and while the movie is still absolutely hilarious, the fantastic idea behind it seems a bit unfulfilled.
All in all, Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus falls into the same category of movies as the classic Snakes on a Plane, it knows what it's doing, it tries its best to be excellent at it, and sadly, it falls just short of the mark. However, all is forgiven because it has a title like Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, and also, because it is at least in all ways a better movie than Aliens Vs. Predator. All in all, not a bad movie to rent or pick up for cheap if you are a group of people who like unpretentious movies. We did, and laughed our heads off, after all.

 Really Pathetic Productions 1997-2009 Menu Bar by Albatross.