Past Entertainment Articles.

Article for the week of 3/5/06

Birth Craze in Hollywood Gets Stranger Still
By, Grey Entertainment

Angelina Jolie, Katie Holmes, maybe Brittany Spears again, Michael Jackson’s test tubes are at least rattling, Madonna is in negotiation to defrost her ovaries again, it appears that childbirth is all the craze in Tinsletown.
Naturally things are strange. At the low end of the spectrum is Angelina Jolie’s pregnancy to Brad Pitt. According to rumour the Brangelina label has resulted in the belief that every aspect of the pregnancy should be shared between the two.
At least that’s how their explaining Brad Pitt’s little shopping expedition. There’s nothing unusual about a first time expectant father shopping for cribs, cradles, even sporting gear.
It is unusual for said first time expectant father to be wearing a blue maternity dress with pink floral prints.
Back in the Seventies it was well established that fathers were to stay away from any sort of blue that was not a hat.
Similarly it is expected that when the birth occurs both Brad and Angelina will be put on drugs, something no one is objecting to.
At the opposite end of the sanity meter, on the way out side that just makes everyone stop and shake their head a little, is the Tomkat pregnancy.
Debate still rages as to weather or not Katie Holmes had, or even still has the slightest idea of what she’s gotten herself into. The best advice anyone has given her is to follow in Brangelina’s footsteps during the birth and have Tom experience everything she does.
With the latest Scientologist ramblings of Tom Cruise being very poorly accepted by women and most men there is no end of willing volunteers to help implant the watermelon Cruise would have to pass.
However Scientology has not yet determined whether or not such a thing is a positive or a negative. Apparently they too like the idea of a Tom Cruise who spends less time jumping around while promoting their beliefs, yet still need more support from the likes of John Travolta, who is married and Forrest Whittaker, who does not like watermelon.
In the middle of the road is the wish of men to bear their own children.
Yes, compared to Tom Cruise, Scientology and giving birth upside down this is middle of the road.
This small group of celebrities claim that women should not be allowed to hog all the glory (read publicity) of childbearing, and demand that they be allowed to undergo the same process.
Unlike the proposed Cruise Coexperience these men would give birth by caesarean, rather than the more painful manner.
Among the more prominent names are Bob Geldof, Heath Ledger, Phil Collins and Mick Jagger’s current partner.
Critics claim this cheapens the entire act of procreation, however then they look at Michael Jackson’s varied . . . I don’t know, attempts, experiments maybe, and then it doesn’t seem nearly as crazy.