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Past Entertainment Articles.
Article for the week of 3/5/06
Birth Craze in Hollywood Gets
Stranger Still
By, Grey Entertainment
Angelina Jolie, Katie Holmes, maybe Brittany Spears again, Michael Jackson’s
test tubes are at least rattling, Madonna is in negotiation to defrost
her ovaries again, it appears that childbirth is all the craze in Tinsletown.
Naturally things are strange. At the low end of the spectrum is Angelina
Jolie’s pregnancy to Brad Pitt. According to rumour the Brangelina label
has resulted in the belief that every aspect of the pregnancy should be
shared between the two.
At least that’s how their explaining Brad Pitt’s little shopping expedition.
There’s nothing unusual about a first time expectant father shopping for
cribs, cradles, even sporting gear.
It is unusual for said first time expectant father to be wearing a blue
maternity dress with pink floral prints.
Back in the Seventies it was well established that fathers were to stay
away from any sort of blue that was not a hat.
Similarly it is expected that when the birth occurs both Brad and Angelina
will be put on drugs, something no one is objecting to.
At the opposite end of the sanity meter, on the way out side that just
makes everyone stop and shake their head a little, is the Tomkat pregnancy.
Debate still rages as to weather or not Katie Holmes had, or even still
has the slightest idea of what she’s gotten herself into. The best advice
anyone has given her is to follow in Brangelina’s footsteps during the
birth and have Tom experience everything she does.
With the latest Scientologist ramblings of Tom Cruise being very poorly
accepted by women and most men there is no end of willing volunteers to
help implant the watermelon Cruise would have to pass.
However Scientology has not yet determined whether or not such a thing
is a positive or a negative. Apparently they too like the idea of a Tom
Cruise who spends less time jumping around while promoting their beliefs,
yet still need more support from the likes of John Travolta, who is married
and Forrest Whittaker, who does not like watermelon.
In the middle of the road is the wish of men to bear their own children.
Yes, compared to Tom Cruise, Scientology and giving birth upside down
this is middle of the road.
This small group of celebrities claim that women should not be allowed
to hog all the glory (read publicity) of childbearing, and demand that
they be allowed to undergo the same process.
Unlike the proposed Cruise Coexperience these men would give birth by
caesarean, rather than the more painful manner.
Among the more prominent names are Bob Geldof, Heath Ledger, Phil Collins
and Mick Jagger’s current partner.
Critics claim this cheapens the entire act of procreation, however then
they look at Michael Jackson’s varied . . . I don’t know, attempts, experiments
maybe, and then it doesn’t seem nearly as crazy.
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