Whee! Another chapter is done. I think there are a total of three chatpers left! Two more and then the ending! Its finally almost over. I love this ficbut I really want to get Amber Linings finished! mutters Anyway, this one doesn't have any sex or lime or the good stuff, but there is lots of plot! And the begining of the end!
Ravyn
Remember I do not own own RK. Very sad, but true.
As always, when this isn't edited. sheepish But Poor J.D. is fixing to be out of town for a while and I peronally belive Moonlight Updates are more important than one-hundred percent grammer. My apologies.
Kaoru pressed her hands against her knees and took deep, shuddering breaths as the nausea passed by her. She was sitting in the bathhouse where she had hidden when she felt the slight tinge that had been bothering her for a week or so now rush through her system. Luckily, it had just been occasional and minor and Kenshin hadn’t noticed that anything was up yet. He had, in the past few weeks since he had tackled her in the bathhouse, been attentive in a way that still gave her goosebumps. He shared her futon, regardless of whom or what was in the dojo, which was saying a lot. She had been deliberately been keeping guests in and out. Just this morning Gensai had returned from his two week trip to visit a friend and had cometo reclaim his grandchildren. Watching them had been deliberate; so between the girls and Yahiko, Kenshin had been behaving.
Which didn’t mean he let her sleep alone, ever. If she went to bed before he did, then she woke up in his arms. Sometimes he followed her right away and sometimes the only knowledge she had of him in her bed was the impression of a firm pillow and a strand or two of red hair on the quilt. He was being tactful about there relationship, if they had one, and she appreciated it. She was still struggling to understand what was going on herself. He didn’t cast those long, longing looks at the gate the Rurouni had, and he didn’t seem to mind digging into his own pocket to share money if she was running out of yen. In fact, now that she thought about it; he seemed to have quite a bit of yen to his name. Things she hadn’t thought the dojo needed: repairs, rugs, and repairs on the bathhouse kept appearing. Sometimes she would find a new ribbon among her things or material for a new kimono set inside her trunk for whenever she got around to it. Part of her wanted to hope it meant he was staying. That the occasional backing her into a corner and ravishing her senseless meant he was staying, but even as he began to repair her heart, doubt lingered.
Now this…
Kaoru pressed a hand flat to her stomach and wished fervently her mother was there. She was late on her second monthly, and her last had only been a few spots. Yahiko had approached her once, worried about her, and she had softly informed him that she was just stressed. Yahiko did the laundry so he was the only one who would have noticed her skipping. She had noticed, though, that since she had mentioned being stressed out because of the attack or whatever reason they gave it, most of her chores around the house had all but disappeared. She would have blamed it on Kenshin but he seemed content to watch her instead of rushing about, but then when she went off to teach she wasn’t sure what he did. Yahiko had told her he practiced, and she would have enjoyed watching him just to pick out to the different techniques of his sword style, if not for the muscle movements or the way that he moved with a blade in his hand; all lethal grace and gorgeous power.
Shaking off the image of Kenshin practicing, and the following image of him naked by moonlight, and took another deep breath. The conversation with Tokio she had been putting off needed to be had and she needed to go today. She had asked Tae, last week, if she had heard of a good time to head over, and that morning Yahiko had come in complaining that Tae wanted her to come by today. Kaoru went back to her room and listened to the sound of Kenshin making breakfast. Kaoru was thankful he never tested there stomach’s during the first meal and generally only cooked rice, miso, and left out tofu tails for those who liked them. He always had hot tea ready and that was the best part of breakfast for her the past week. She didn’t know what Kenshin did to his that she didn’t do to hers, but it was always soothing on her stomach. Kaoru reached for one of her normal kimonos but stopped when her eyes landed on the green one with the dusting of bamboo sprouts and leaves Misao had bought her that she still hadn’t worn. Grabbing it instead she tugged it into place and wrapped the dark green obi across her waist. Pulling her hair out of its braid she pulled it into its normal high tail and admired the fall of the new fabric.
For all that she complained, she truly did love new clothing. Her feet warm in her tabi, she headed to see if her guess for breakfast was right. Kaoru bumped into Kenshin coming to get her and he steadied her as she almost crashed into him as he opened the door to her room. Kaoru looked up slightly startled and he took advantage of the move to kiss her lazily.
“Morning, Koishii.” Kenshin breathed against her mouth, kissing it again, so light she almost missed it, before he pulled back and tucked her hand into his. “Yahiko is waiting on us.”
Kaoru, a little dazed from his kiss, nodded and followed him into breakfast. She did her best to ignore the way his eyes kept flicking to her face and then dropping down to her kimono. Kaoru kept from blushing on the fact that he had given her much darker, heated looks over the past two months. She had been doing everything she could to keep someone in the dojo with them, but she knew that the stalling tactics were going to have to end soon or Kenshin would be rather suspicious. If he wasn’t already. However, if he was suspicioushe was keeping itto himself and wasn’t saying anything.
He was trying to give her space.
That revelation came to her as she was taking careful bites of rice, attempting to see how it affected her stomach. The Tofu tails were easy to go down, and although part of her rebelled at the idea, if she had thought she could have gotten away with it, she might have requested some green-beans soaked in vinegar. But that would require telling him why she needed the vinegar on her stomach…
“Yahiko mentioned that you were going to meet with Tae this morning.” Kenshin broke the morning silence and Kaoru looked up to see a pair of attentive amber-eyes watching her. Sometimes they lightened into an almost-blue, but only those moments just before the sun rose and he watched her with lazy satisfaction.
There were no demands to go with her. No suggestion that she take her Bokken. No sign that he was particular paranoid this morning, but there was a controlled look in his eyes she hadn’t noticed before. He knew something was bothering her that something was up…yet he was speaking as if he was going to let her go.
She swallowed.
“Yes,” she replied calmly. There it was. Another one of those flickering emotions he allowed her to see but never to read. “I need to talk to her about a few things.” She forced herself to sound calm and controlled even if her Chi was a mess of emotion that she couldn’t explain.
She knew he could read everything he wanted from just the expression in her eyes, and she knew, even more so, that he could read her Chi without really trying anymore. Perhaps only once or twice had she truly been able to keep something from him, but never this part of him. The Rurouni had allowed her to hide behind her shields, to give her the allusion of privacy. To fool himself. The Battousai…this Kenshin…he never allowed her that. His mannerisms told her full and well that he knew what she was doing, knew what she was feeling, and that he was going to give her enough space to figure out how to explain herself to him and then he was going to demand answers.
Everything down the set of his shoulders told her that he thought, knew, that she was his. Her stomach curled and she quickly took another sip of her warm tea and swallowed it so that the warmth could settle the queasiness of her stomach a bit more.
“Actually,” Kaoru breezed, “I should probably be heading out.” She turned her gaze back to her…well, to Kenshin. “Do you mind taking care of the dishes?”
“Yahiko and I will take care of things this morning.” Kenshin assured her. “Do you plan on being back for lunch?”
Kaoru swallowed. “As of right now, yes.”
He gave her another of those long, hooded expressions and simply nodded. Not pressing her. Something shivered down her spine. Standing careful, so not to upset the now settled tummy, she moved to slip on her sandals on, and felt his eyes watching her movements the entire way out of the gate.
How could he not know…
Yahiko waited until Kenshin came back before he set down his own rice bowl with a perplexed expression on his face. “It isn’t just me….she has been acting weird lately…”
Kenshin was quite for a moment, his eyes vague as he searched something in his memory. “Yes.” He quietly agreed.
Yahiko stared at him. “Does this have something to do with the two of you?”
Kenshin sipped his tea and looked him straight in the eye. The color around his pupil shifted and burned, like a fire crackling. “Not in the way you are thinking. I believe I still confuse her, and that she…fights herself. There is still much damage left by the Rurouni.” His mouth curled slightly and Yahiko started at the expression of…possession that crossed his friends face. “However, I do not believe that is the main reason for her preoccupation.”
Yahiko sighed. “I knew you were going to say that.”
Kenshin favored him with smirk. “But, I will find out.”
Yahiko didn’t doubt that statement for a single moment. The fifteen year old shrugged and decided that using a little of the yen he had been saving to take Tsubame out for a ribbon or some treat that night would be a good idea.
He didn’t think he really wanted to be around for Kenshin’s idea of persuasion.
Kaoru sighed as she graceful sank onto Tokio’s front porch, wishing for a bit of that Egyptian cotton her friend seemed to wear often, and admiring the pattern on the light blue kimono. “It’s rather late for such a warm spell.” Kaoru grumpily informed her friend as she sipped the tea. The baby was lying on a blanket, his small feet stained with grass, taking a late morning nap.
“Yes.” Tokio admitted. “But that is not why you are here, is it?” Her brown eyes studied her face with enough intensity to make her fidget.
“No,” Kaoru whispered in agreement, her eyes skipping away from her friend nervously. “I…I…this is nice Tea, Tokio.”
Tokio made a little noise in the back of her throat and sighed. “Kaoru…is this about Kenshin again? You haven’t said much about your relationship in the past few months and I have wondered. You would not be the first to warm you companion’s bed before the marriage vows.” There was a faint little smile on her friend’s mouth that gave Kaoru far too much information about her own friend’s love-life.
Kaoru lowered her eyes and fiddled with the edge of her kimono.
“Kaoru…if you are worried about sharing his bed…” Tokio let the sentence hang and watched as her young friends face colored prettily, contrasting with the blue of her eyes.
“No!” Kaoru protested, jumping slightly at the vehemence in her own voice. She flushed again. “No…it’s not that.”
Tokio frowned. “Kaoru….if you’re not worried about sharing his bed, then…” her brown eyes widened. “Kaoru, your not pregnant are you?”
Kaoru swallowed and raised guilty eyes to her friend. She wasn’t guilty about the baby. Gods no, how could she be? After praying for this and hoping for this for years, holding a little piece of him close to heart could never make her feel guilty. It was the reactions of her friends that were going to have that made her stomach churn. “I don’t know!” Kaoru wailed, suddenly fighting the tears that sprang into her eyes. She sniffled a bit and wiped her eyes. “I am so damn moody.”
Tokio made a noise in the back of her throat and poured her another cup of tea. “It’s okay. I am going to ask you a few simple questions and I want you to answer them as best you can.”
Kaoru nodded and sipped her tea, thankful for the distraction.
“When was your last cycle?” Tokio asked gently. Kaoru bit her lip.
“Almost two months ago. I mean, I had my moon cycle last month but it was so light…and this month’s hasn’t come yet.” There was quite uncertainty in her voice.
Tokio nodded. “Have you been sick to your stomach? Nauseous at all? Have you been suffering from a head cold? Have you been feeling lethargic?”
Kaoru swallowed and answered her questions as she was best able, hesitantly sipping her tea and fidgeting as she thought out her answers. Tokio was quite through it all, nibbling on the tea cakes she had brought out as well, watching her with large liquid brown eyes.
“My guess, as good as I can tell after birthing two and being pregnant with this little one is that you can expect a child come late spring or early summer.” Tokio told her calmly. “However, you might want to have Dr. Genzai or that fox-lady doctor examine you to be sure.”
“No!” Kaoru said, sitting straight up. “If they find out they will tell Kenshin!”
Tokio stilled. “Is there a particular reason you don’t want the father to know of his upcoming child?” Tokio asked in a mild voice.
Kaoru ducked her head and swallowed, biting her lip to still her lower lip from its trembling as tears suddenly welled in her eyes again. “I don’t want him to stay if he doesn’t want to, Tokio.” Her voice was muffled and slightly broken.
Tokio blinked at her. “He has said he wishes to leave?”
Kaoru raised her face to her friend. It was pale even in the sunlight and her eyes looked to be too large for her face. “How can he not? He claims to be different from the Rurouni but they shared the same soul! How can he be so different?” She lowered her head, her nails biting into her soft palms. “How can I ask him to do something that is so against his nature!” Her voice flared with fire.
Tokio frowned a little. “Kaoru, what do you think this is for him?”
Kaoru gave a little shrug. “I don’t know. I can’t allow myself to hope again, Tokio. I…I love him.” Her voice broke. “I love him enough to let him go. No matter how many times he walks away from me. I can’t give him a reason to stay. The Rurouni already proved that it would make him resent me, even as if didn’t want to. You never saw the look as his face as he watched the empty, long road. As he washed laundry in an attempt to wash his hands of sins he would never forgive himself for.”
She raised eyes defiant and burning hot. “I will not bind him to me. I will not give him a reason to stay.”
Tokio carefully put her cup down to hide the slight shaking of her hands. “And what of when you begin to gain?”
Kaoru swallowed. “I do not think he will be here long enough for that, Tokio. He has been here three months and yet he makes no moves to do more than have my body. He claims me as his yet he has no desire to make it permanent.” She raised watering eyes with soft trails of water along her pale cheeks. “I will not ask him to stay with me. It would break him.”
Tokio sat there for a long time, watching as Kaoru ducked her head. The sunlight glinted off her hair almost as brightly as it glinted off the tears that dripped onto her hand. Tokio got up and got a wet rag and handed it to crying girl. She wiped at her face hard enough to turn her cheeks pink.
“It’s going to be okay, Kaoru,” Tokio soothed. “I promise.”
Kaoru swallowed hard and nodded, fisting her hands so tightly in the material in her hands that it stretched and her knuckles turned white. “I should be getting back to the Dojo soon,” she quietly spoke. “I told Kenshin and Yahiko I would be back for lunch.”
Tokio nodded. “I want you to get home to. Things are getting more dangerous. You know about the betrayal in the police force? Well, Hajime hasn’t been happy lately and I think its getting worse. Have you guys been bothered by anything yet?”
Kaoru shook her head, thankful for the distraction. “No.”
Tokio sighed. “Just make sure you move as quickly through the market as possible, okay?”
Kaoru offered her a tiny smile as the baby next to her began to stir. “I promise.
Yahiko tapped on his knees, watching as the sun hit high noon. “She isn’t back yet.”
Kenshin looked up from where he had been cutting the fish he planned on cooking for lunch. “I know,” his tone was even, and Yahiko turned to make sure it wasn’t the Rurouni he was staring at. However, the bright, burning eyes of topaz were hardly hidden behind his bangs, so he felt a little relief roll into his body. Yahiko felt his mouth quirk up. Who would have thought that he would one day take comfort from the Battousai?
“Should we go after her?” Yahiko asked, his voice concerned.
Kenshin closed his eyes, breathing deeply as he continued to chop. It amazed Yahiko that he didn’t really even have to look anymore. When his eyes opened they were filled with colors as choppy as the ocean. “I want to.” He told him. “But she is with Tae and she always walks well traveled roads. If something happens we will know about it.”
Yahiko had to agree with that. People were prone to stop by and talk about all the daily gossip, including there overly nosy neighbors, so if something did happen to delay her, they would hear about it.
Something still ate at his stomach lining.
By the time they had eaten there lunch and set aside a plate for Kaoru, both were quite ready to head out. Yahiko strapped his bokken to his back and Yahiko noted that he still carried the reverse blade. They were just stepping down the steps of the dojo when they felt Saitoh. Looking up they waited until he entered the dojo. There was a hot look in his eyes and hemet there glances with a barely surprised rage.
“There was an attack at the market.”
Kenshin went still behind Yahiko.
Then his Chi rose up and whipped around the small clearing. He didn’t even have to complete his next sentence. They both knew.
Something had gone wrong.
Kaoru swallowed a bit as she walked slowly towards the Akebeko. Her face burned a little where she had scrubbed at her face with a wet cloth to hide her tear tracks. Tokio had been very understanding, it was just a shock to cry in front of someone. She hadn’t done that since her mother’s death. Yahiko may have heard her tears for Kenshin, but he never saw them. She knew it wasn’t a weakness to cry, that was some stupid male idea, but she had never been one to show such vulnerability if she could help it. Crying in front of someone was giving them a hold over you, the knowledge that they had the power to see deep into your heart. The only person who had come close to seeing that side of her was Kenshin.
Her breath still caught painfully if she let it. Both times, the night the fireflies had been so beautiful and he had hugged her goodbye and the night had told her goodbye for what should have been forever. Kaoru stopped mid-walk and leaned up against the side of a brick building that was just on the outskirts of the market. She watched as people hustled and bustled around, screaming and yelling at each other as they bartered for lower prices. There was the fabric lady with the large mole on her chin and the fish monger who was known for his generosity for orphans and widows.
Kaoru let her hand splay across her obi and her still flat stomach. A warm glow fought its way through the despair and she breathed in the scent of home. She was pregnant. Tokio had all but confirmed her suspicions. She was going to have Kenshin’s child. She could never tell him. Tears brimmed along her tired eyes and she look towards the clouds so she could hide them.
How as she going to do this? Tokio had assured her that Saitoh had never been able to feel herown children until they hit their last trimester. Her child's Chi was hidden within her own spirit. That mean she had seven or so months to convince him it was okay to leave her again. Perhaps less depending on her weight gain…she had no idea how she was going to hide this. In her Kimono’s it would be simple to take out padding. But at night, when he pulled her close and her stomach was pressed against his side? How then was she going to do this?
Frustration filled her and she gave a muffled shriek of mixed emotions. How did you go about doing something like this? If she just went up to him and told him it was okay to leave now, she was going to be alright, he would argue with her and that would set her back even more. Her nails bit into her palms tightly and she used the pain to pull herself together.
“You don’t have to do this today,” she reminded herself softly. “You can always think of this later.” She was right. Squaring her shoulders she began making her way to the Akebeko. It was growing hotter as the sun rose and beads of sweat clung to her temples. She had promised Kenshin she would try to make it for lunch, but the heat was making her feel a little nauseous and light headed. Tae would be more than willing to lend her a pot of tea. It was supposed to be fall. Where had this heat wave come from?
Walking into the Akebeko was like walking into a shade tree and she never loved Tae for it more. It didn’t take long for her to be sat down at a booth and given some of Tae’s special tea. Tsubame had taken one look at her hot face and squeaked. Sipping the tea did wonders for her nausea and she was suddenly thankful that she was going to be pregnant for the winter and spring. If she had been pregnant during the heat of the summer... Shuddering slightly, she took another sip.
The fight spilled into the Akebeko so fast that Kaoru was surprised that she hadn’t heard the ruckus outside. A man came flying in and four men about the size of Sano came in as well. They were allmuscular and appeared to have some western blood in them. They were glaring at the little man and Kaoru recognized him as the little tofu vendor that she bought supplies at.
“You know where she is.” The bigger of the men hissed. Kaoru blinked in surprise at that. Who where these men looking for? As far as she knew the man wasn’t married.
“The Kamiya brat is supposed to be somewhere in this market and she alwaysbuys her tofu from you. So where is she?”
Kaoru felt her stomach go cold. They had swords in their hands now and if the condition of those blades said anything, they had been used to kill more than once. The little man in front of them had no experience with such things and would be unable to defend himself at all.
“I’m right here,” Kaoru waspishly snapped as she walked over and helped the little old man up. “What do you want?”
The blade was an inch from her face and level with her nose before she could blink. “You’re coming with us.”
Kaoru reached out and shoved the blade away with sweaty palms. It wasn’t like she had just herself to be worried about anymore. “I am?” Her tone was biting and she hid her fear. This mean could kill or rape her without little thought and that terrified her. However, she couldn’t let someone be killed to save herself. She was roughly hauled to her feet and out of the corner of her eye she saw Tsubame slip away. She was either running to the dojo or running to the police. That at least meant that help was on its way soon.
She was dragged forward. “You’re a tiny little thing. I wonder what he sees in you.” Kaoru was silent as she was practically lifted off her feet and dragged out of the market. They didn’t even make an attempt to hide the fact that they were taking her against her will and she rolled her eyes mentally. The hand on her arm was tight enough to leave bruises and she winced as she stumbled and was jerked up.
They moved through the forest with surprising quickness and she made mental notes so she could find her way back. Somewhere along the path she lost one of her sandals and was forced to walk at an awkward gait as the forest bit through her Tabi. She winced as she stepped wrong and landed painfully on a rock. That was going to leave a bruise. By the time they had dragged her into a small clearing, where a small shack was built, it was late afternoon. Kaoru was shoved inside, with the warnings to be good snarled at her, and the door was slammed shut. Kaoru listened to the sounds of a lock and looked around.
The shack was carelessly built and there were several pieces of wood that appeared to have once been firewood. Her eyes landed on a small piece that was roughly the length of her wrist to elbow. Picking it up she tested its weight and nodded. The fading light came through the cracks and she heard the sounds of a camp fire being built. Running through the forest at night, with one shoe, wasn’t going to be fun but she had no intention of staying put until someone found her.
That made her pause.
If she did stay, then perhaps Kenshin would fall b ack into his habit of thinking he was a constant danger to her. She knew it had been one of the main reasons that Kenshin had wanted to leave her time and time again. Biting on her lower lip she considered that. Finally she came to the decision that it was a bad idea. First, there were four brutes out there that were going to get board. While she wasn’t a virgin, not anymore at least, being raped wasn’t something she desired to have happen to her. Not only that but it might guilt Kenshin into making him stay even longer. Thirdly, she wasn’t a damsel in distress, never had been, and refused to pretend to be. How was she going to convince Kenshin that he could leave her alone and get back on the road he longed for if he had to rescue her?
Besides, it wasn’t just about her anymore.