Disclaimers: Gundam Wing belongs to Sunrise. Any songs or quotes belong to their respective authors listed with them.

Author’s Notes: If you know of any Trowa sites or good Gundam Wing fanfiction sites where I can post this fic, then please email me with the info. It would be much appreciated. Thanks! Don’t be disgusted by the Britney Spears song if you hate her. I’m not a fan, although I do like some of her songs. I chose this song because the lyrics fit one of the main themes of the story. Also, I’m not sure who owns that song, since I don’t think she writes her own lyrics, but it all belongs to her and her producers. Feel free to skip the song if you want. I won’t be offended. Heck! I won’t even know! Anyway, enjoy chapter one!

//_-

You tell me you’re in love with me

Like you can’t take your pretty eyes away from me

It’s not that I don’t want to stay

But every time you come too close I move away

I wanna believe in everything that you say

‘Cause it sounds so good

But if you really want me, move slow

There’s things about me you just have to know

Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I’m scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight

Treat you right, be with you day and night

Baby all I need is time

I don’t wanna be so shy, un-uh

Every time that I’m alone I wonder why

Hope that you will wait for me

You’ll see that you’re the only one for me

I wanna believe in everything that you say

‘Cause it sounds so good

But if you really want me, move slow

There’s things about me you just have to know

Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I’m scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight

Treat you right, be with you day and night

All I really want is to hold you tight

Treat you right, be with you day and night

Baby all I need is time

Just hang around and you’ll see

There’s nowhere I’d rather be

If you love me, trust in me

The way that I trust in you

Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I’m scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight

Treat you right, be with you day and night

Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I’m scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight

Treat you right, be with you day and night

Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I’m scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight

//_-

A contented and loud purr grumbled in the throat of a huge lion as Trowa caressed his mane and murmured promises of treats for later. The lion merely yawned and rolled closer to the bars for a better scratch. Trowa turned his head at the sound of footsteps behind him.

"Trowa," Catherine called out.

Trowa gave the lion one last pat through the cage before turning and slowly standing. His observant eyes scanned over a girl beside Catherine. She was petite, with flaming red hair that cascaded in glistening curls and waves down her back. Her skin was a delicate "peaches ‘n’ cream" complexion, soft and smooth. Her eyes were captivating; the large and luminous gray-violet orbs gazed shyly at him under thick, dark lashes. A feeling flitted through him, one of attraction; one he hadn’t felt much before. He shifted slightly and said nothing.

"Trowa, this is Averil O’Hare. She has been hired on to the circus as our new horse trainer." Catherine turned to Averil and smiled, "Averil, this is my brother Trowa Barton, an acrobat and a clown. He can show you where to stable your horse, because I have dinner duty tonight. Oh, and Trowa, give her horse Pixie’s old stable, ‘kay?" Trowa nodded and watched her leave. Then his eyes traveled back to Averil, who held her horse’s reigns loosely in her long, slender fingers.

She stepped forward a little nervously. "How long has the circus been in this town?" she asked conversationally, following Trowa who had begun to head in the direction of the stables.

He turned slightly to look at her and answered, "This is our home base. Right now, we’re training for our next season."

"Oh," a pause, then, "You were a Gundam pilot, weren’t you?" she asked boldly.

"Yes."

"I thought you looked familiar."

"You look familiar, as well," he said pointedly, gazing down at her seriously.

Her eyes widened and she looked up at him, a little startled. "I don’t know what you’re talking about."

"Don’t lie; it doesn’t flatter you. All the blood runs out of your face." Trowa replied with a hint of amusement in his voice.

Averil’s mouth opened in anger and her brows knit together. "How dare you accuse me of lying!" she said, stamping her foot.

Trowa simply reached over and took the reigns from her hands. As he turned to lead the horse into its stable, a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. When he turned back around, he remarked, "That’s better. You’re cute when you’re angry." Indeed, she did make quite a sight, with her chin tilted haughtily and a flame in her cheeks, eyes flashing dangerously. Of course, none of this phased Trowa, except perhaps, the strange turn his stomach took when she opened her mouth to speak, gave up, and finally smiled at her own amusing behavior.

//_-

After dinner, Averil stood in front of the mirror in her trailer and sighed. I’ve already been recognized, she thought dejectedly, I thought the circus would be the perfect place to hide, but then they tell me I’ll have to perform in front of hundreds of people. And besides, we’re going to stay here for two more months. They could easily find me by then! I need to get a disguise. I guess the first thing I could do is cut and dye my hair. At this, her vision quickly blurred, because her father had always loved her hair. She picked up a pair of scissors and closed her eyes as she brought them closer to one of her silky locks. A tear made its lonely trail down her cheek.

She gasped and her eyes flew open when a hand reached around her and gently pulled the scissors from her grasp. She looked into her mirror to see Trowa behind her, a frown etching his usually expressionless features. He turned her to face him and wiped away the tears. "Don’t do that," he commanded gruffly, not even sure himself whether he meant the cutting or the crying.

Averil lowered her eyes and stared at her hand that was resting against Trowa’s chest. Her heart was still beating wildly after the scare he had given her. She shivered slightly at the heat of his hands wrapped around her arms and the memories that swept over her mercilessly. She bit her lip.

Trowa saw the look of pain that crossed her features. Confused, he quickly released her and stepped back, placing the scissors on her dresser. "I brought you a few costumes. For practices, you can wear whatever’s comfortable for you, but for the performance, you’ll have to consult the costume manager, Vivian." He looked over at the array of bright fabrics, silks, and sequins that created a small heap on her bed. He had quickly thrown them there when he had seen what she was about to do. For some reason, Averil cutting her hair had given him an inexplicable and unpleasant sensation. He turned his head towards her again and eyed her, trying to analyze his abnormal reaction.

"They’re very beautiful," she said softly, fingering a lavender creation.

Trowa examined her movements. Obviously, she was hiding something. She hadn’t seemed to fear him until he touched her. "Why were you going to cut your hair?" he said suddenly.

"I-I needed a change," she muttered, mentally kicking herself for her lame answer.

"Now what did I say about lying?" Trowa asked, stepping towards her slowly. He stopped when she backed away in sudden terror and clutched at the post of her bed, her knuckles turning white. He frowned again in confusion. What was she so afraid of? His eyes scanned the room for any clues. The only thing out of the ordinary was a picture of a laughing little girl scooped up in the arms of an equally delighted man. "Is this your father?" Trowa asked, picking up the picture and studying it.

"Yes," she said quickly, glad he had changed the subject. Now if he would just leave so she could be alone. She closed her eyes gratefully when he placed it back on her dresser and headed towards the door.

Averil caught her breath as he returned to pick up the scissors again, but thankfully he walked back to the door. Without turning, Trowa spoke calmly, "If you try a trick like that again, you’re fired," and walked out. Averil exhaled in relief that he was finally gone. She could barely think with that guy around, much less formulate credible answers to his questions. He had her on her toes already, worrying about whether he would recognize her. She certainly was a bad liar. Despite the fact that she might be recognized, she was glad that she had a reason to keep her hair. She stroked it fondly and smiled. After placing the costumes into her closet, she climbed into bed, then leaned over and switched off her lamp.

//_-

Trowa lay in the darkness of his room, staring at the ceiling with his hands behind his head. He took no notice of the figure that crept softly into his room. Catherine observed that he was still awake, so she said what had been on her mind lately, "You miss them, don’t you?"

"How did you know?" he said, pleased that she had sensed it.

"Sisters just know things like that," she said kindly, sitting next to him on the bed. She stroked his hair affectionately. "You know, I could ask the ringmaster if you could go this year to get our supplies. Then you could take that time to visit your old friends."

"That would be nice," he said contentedly. They sat in silence for awhile, simply enjoying each other’s presence. Catherine continued to comb her fingers through Trowa’s hair.

Finally, he verbalized his thoughts, "Where did you find that girl Averil?"

Catherine smiled. It was unlike him to ask about new circus employees. I guess our Trowa’s growing up, she thought, still amazed that he was already 20. It was high time he took notice of a girl. "She came to us asking if there was any job we had for her. I noticed that she was familiar with horses. She was riding bareback after all, and she’s also pretty and graceful enough to have her own act if she’s hardworking. So I convinced the ringmaster to start up the horse act again. We haven’t had one since Mab and Pixie left. Why do you ask?"

"I think she’s hiding something."

"What makes you think that?"

"She looks familiar. When I asked her about it, she got upset. Then, when I took her those costumes, she was about to cut off her hair."

"Why would she do that?!" Catherine exclaimed.

"I don’t know, maybe to disguise herself, but she was going to do it with her eyes closed. She was crying . . ." Trowa trailed off, remembering how his heart had clenched painfully at the sight.

"Aww, poor thing," Catherine said softly. There was a pause.

"She knew I was a Gundam pilot," Trowa said darkly.

"Trowa, she’s harmless. She merely recognized you from your picture floating around in the media."

"When am I supposed to leave for the supplies?" he asked, deciding it was time to close the topic of Averil.

Catherine stood, used to Trowa’s tendencies to abruptly cut off conversations. She answered, "In about a week. They haven’t made the lists yet, so while they’re doing that, you can take the time to call the guys." She leaned over and planted a soft kiss on his forehead. "Sleep well, brother," she said tenderly as she pulled away, but Trowa pulled her back for a hug.

"Thank you for understanding," he murmured into her hair before releasing her.

"‘Night," she whispered as she quietly left the room.

//_-

Averil urged her horse Miles into a trot and watched the artificial sunrise reflect off the lake in scattered pools of light. So far, her first few days in the circus had been fun. Everyone treated her with like family and asked few questions about her personal life. She hadn’t seen much of Trowa for a few days, which was perfectly fine with her. She didn’t need anyone snooping around and interrogating her like some criminal, no matter how handsome he was or how intriguing his eyes were.

She pulled Miles to a stop and slipped off his bare back, sliding her hand over his smooth, white coat. She cuddled her cheek against his and giggled. "You’re the one that’s handsome, Miles. You know that? You’re the most handsomest horsie in the world," she said between giggles. He stood patiently, used to his mistress’s antics. Averil noticed Miles’s ears prick up at some sound that she didn’t hear. She turned, but saw nothing in the dark shadows of the woods that circled the clearing. Yet she still felt that someone was there. Her heart began a frenzied rhythm. They’re here, she thought frantically, but then forced herself to relax. If it really were them, then Miles wouldn’t be so calm. It had to be someone else.

"You can come out. I know you’re there," she called out bravely, although her stomach was still performing acrobatics.

Someone stepped out into the clearing, allowing himself to be seen. "You’re less naïve than I originally thought," he said.

"Trowa," Averil breathed. "Wh-what are you doing here?" she stuttered, nervously tucking some errant strands of hair behind her ear.

"This is a fine horse," he said, deliberately avoiding her question and walking up to place a hand on the horse’s back.

"Yes, well he’s a purebred Arabian. His name is Miles," she said absently, watching as Trowa inspected the horse. She noticed a wave of emotion cross his face briefly, unaware that she had reminded him of a certain sandy-haired friend that he hadn’t seen for a year and missed very much. "H-how long have you been here?"

An amused twitch tugged at his lips as he stood from where he had been examining a hoof to lock gazes with Averil over Miles’s back. "Long enough," he said, and watched as her cheeks blazed crimson. Mercifully, Trowa asked, "Did your father give you this horse?"

Averil’s gray-violet eyes shimmered as she stared off into some long ago memory. "Yes, he’s the foal of my father’s horse." Her eyes turned to focus on Trowa again. "Animals seem to take to you easily. Miles usually only lets me handle him. And then there’s the way those lions let you pet them—it’s uncanny."

"We understand each other," he said simply, coming around the side of the horse to stand before her. "It looks like you take good care of him," he remarked.

Averil placed a hand on her hip and tossed her head indignantly.

"Well of course I do! I’m not a criminal like you seem to think I am."

"But you’re not an angel, either, like you pretend to be."

Averil rolled her eyes. Her initial thoughts of anxiety quickly turned to offense. Does this guy ever get angry?! He just says everything with that annoying, calm voice of his. Who does he think he is? "No, I’m not an angel, and I never claimed to be one. Now would you step aside so I can go feed Miles? You wouldn’t want me to starve him, now would you?"

"Don’t get angry. I was just complimenting you."

"Well, thank you, your lordship. I feel so honored," she bit out sarcastically, "Besides, I thought you like it when I get angry." She smirked triumphantly as he was rendered speechless. It was his turn to blush, and he did, very adorably, too. Averil restrained herself from performing a victory dance, but she couldn’t help it when a laugh slipped past her hand.

Trowa was relieved at his quick recovery, but it was hard not to smile at the sweet, girlish peals of laughter that now broke forth from her soft lips. When she stopped a moment later, her anger was gone as quick as it had come and her eyes shone at him merrily. "Trowa, do you ever really smile?" she asked, wondering what he would look like if he did.

"Yes, but only when there’s a good reason to."

"Isn’t being friendly a good enough reason?"

"There are too many unfriendly people who smile to appear friendly. Looks can be deceiving. I want people to figure out whether I’m friend or foe without my smile."

She raised an eyebrow. "So what you’re saying is, you want people to consider you a friend before you’re even friendly."

"Friendliness and kindness can be shown without a smile or a laugh. Often, those friends are loyal for life," he retorted, thinking briefly of Heero and Wufei.

Averil smiled in understanding and slowly nodded her head. "Oh, so you prefer being kind through your actions rather than your words or appearance. That does make sense, but some people may not see that you are a friend, and that could prove unfortunate. But I can see I won’t be able to change your mind. Someday, though," she said matter-of-factly as she led Miles beside her and walked next to Trowa, "I’m going to make you smile, and you’ll never live it down when you do."

He said nothing, but felt that what she said would surely happen. Funny, he was kind of looking forward to it.

//_-

Even More Author's Notes: If you have any comments or flames, review/email me. I can take criticism and I love compliments. Thanks for reading, and God bless!

To Be Continued