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The two men and one woman we have to persuade look bored. I'm starting to worry that they've judged Faith already. Faith's lawyer made a pretty good speech to start with, and even showed a clip of our wedding vows. We were all crying, but everyone on the panel just kinda frowned. The chairman said something about Faith always playing the system any way she can, and how no home movie is going to make anyone forget that. They're obviously pissed by the whole idea of a juvenile offender asking for conjugal visits the instant she hits twenty. Now they're leafing quickly through documents and letters that are supposed to prove Faith's mom was making stuff up. They should have read that stuff before the hearing, but I bet they didn't.

Somehow I expected a stern look and maybe some fist-shaking from Faith's lawyer. She's not what I expected at all. She looks younger than me! She's tiny. She's cute. She has a tiny little voice, even! And the panel doesn't respect her one little bit. The fact that she's black and they're all white seems to be part of it if you ask me. Or maybe it's my imagination. Maybe they just look at her that way because she's young... or because she's on my wife's side, and they already don't think much of Faith. Or of me for that matter. Or any two people who care about each other, unless it's a man and a woman. But maybe that's all my imagination, too.

But this lawyer's smart. Angel was right. And while the rest of us are starting to feel a bit hopeless, she shows no signs of giving up. She acts like she's already won. Faith, seated across the room in her finest canary yellow, smiles encouragingly at me. She insists that her lawyer wouldn't do this if she didn't think there was a chance of succeeding. But I can tell even Faith is having a tough time staying positive when the panel doesn't seem impressed by anything.

There wasn't much time for us all to prepare this morning, but there are two things the lawyer says we have to do to get our CVs back. First, damage control after Faith's mom made her out to be such a monster. Show that she's actually a decent person who is paying for her crimes. Second, show that the new Summers family is as real as any family, depending on each other... even though we've never actually lived together as a family. That's the tricky one. And if both of those things go well, the panel can still decide anything they want. Two straight couples in this state have gotten unusual CV privileges, to help keep families together. But it's pretty clear that to these panel members, two wives and a sister do not a family make.

Faith's lawyer asks Faith some questions to start with, just to drive home the point that she didn't even do most of the things her mom said. This is the most I've ever seen of the meek and mild goody-goody act my wife has been putting on for years behind bars. It's freaking me out a little, actually, but I'm glad she's mastered the technique! Not that the panel is paying much attention. Faith is just one more criminal to them. So... time to get on with the other witnesses.

Giles steps up to the mike. A middle-aged white guy, that oughta impress them!

"Mr. Giles, tell us about Buffy and Faith's volunteer work."

"Yes, actually I helped Buffy get started with that, and Faith has done a great deal to help, even from prison. Buffy's passion has always been making the streets safer at night, and that's something she and Faith have in common. Faith even keeps maps of Sunnydale, and she joins in by phone to help work out what might be done about the most dangerous places."

The panel seems to take at least some interest at first, and Faith's lawyer manages to tie Giles' answers in with some of Faith's good deeds growing up. But we only have so much time, and before long the panel is starting to zone out again.

Tara steps up next, looking terrified.

"Ms. MacLay, talk to me about Faith's family in Sunnydale. You've been their friend for how long?"

Tara stutters nervously, answering questions about Dawn and I, and how close we've become through having Faith join our family. Then she talks about how Faith helped her out with her own life.

"I was in a wonderful relationship that was having some problems. And Faith stepped in, at her own wedding, and made sure we worked things out. And um, we did. And... now I'm engaged, too!" she says, her voice rising suddenly.

A short, sharp squeal from Dawn pretty well deafens me in one ear, and startles the panel members out of their stupor: not a bad thing. We all turn around to stare at Willow, who is grinning proudly from ear to ear and starting to blush. I put my hands over my mouth and we all do our best not to make a scene.

I catch Faith's eye, and she looks so surprised and happy! I'm gripped by the familiar sensation that I'll die if I can't kiss her right now.

Tara starts to babble faster and faster. "And we're going to adopt a baby next year, and maybe another one the year after that, or maybe not for another year, we'll see how it goes, it depends whether we both want masters degrees now or not, and we're either going to buy a small house with... um..." she falters. "I, um, I guess... you don't need to know all that..." Her smile and blush match Willow's. Even Faith's lawyer cracks a little smile.

I hug Dawn and reach back for Willow's hand. My two witches engaged! It's so perfect... and poor Willow, wanting to make the big announcement at the Scooby meeting, and then letting it go to focus on Faith.

Xander takes the stand next, for more of the same... trying to persuade the panel that Faith takes her family seriously, and telling what a good example she and I have been for him and Anya. Willow and Anya won't be testifying. Not enough time.

And I won't be taking the stand, either. As the one who stands to get some action between the sheets, my words wouldn't count for much in this hearing. But there's just enough time left for the star witness. My little sister.

Dawn is squirming in the chair by the mike, looking at Willow and Tara more than at Faith's lawyer. They're her second family, after all. But she gets focussed when the questions start.

"Dawn, how often do you come to visit your sister's wife?"

"I come every time I can, once or twice a week. I'm learning to drive now, too, so I can come out here even when Buffy has to work."

"And what affect has Faith had on your life?"

"Well... she's one of my best friends, and I can talk to her about anything. Sometimes she calls just to talk to me, too. And I... I guess I got in some trouble for a while... taking things that weren't mine. But I don't do that anymore. Faith understood and she helped me to stop. And we have a flower garden together! I do all the work but we plan everything together. 'Cause it's her house too, she just can't live there. And she likes my cooking! I invent stuff all the time. Like peanut butter and banana quesadillas. I've invented those like five times, and Faith's the only one who says they're any good. She'll eat anything, really, but..."

Dawnie was already jumpy about the hearing... and now with Willow and Tara's news, she is beyond wired. Faith's lawyer interrupts her gently. "Does she help you in any other ways?"

"Um, yeah, she helps me with homework sometimes. She's real good at trigonometry. And she taught me how to make web pages! She made a web site for class, and now I'm in charge of it until she gets out. I'm putting in lots of pictures! And I interviewed her for a report I did on prisons. I got an A. And I tell her what books she should read, 'cause she doesn't read as much as me, she only wants to read the really good ones... Plus she helps me with Buffy. We figure out how to cheer Buffy up when she's down. And she tells me how to get my way about stuff at home without getting into a fight."

I sure hope Faith's lawyer knows what she's doing. We're trying to show how keeping me from my wife is hurting everyone, including Dawn... but this is making it sound more like everything is just great as is! I think Faith's lawyer may be trying too hard to prove we're one big happy family. Why give us CVs now? And... what's this about my wife helping Dawn get her way? Great. One more way for them to gang up on me!

"Dawn, can you tell us about... your family? Before Faith, and after Faith?"

Dawn gets very quiet, and my eyes fill with tears as she speaks. "Well, Mom died two years ago, and Dad was already long gone. Now Buffy's my mom, really, and she's the second-best mom ever, but... I miss having her just for a sister. Only now I have Faith... she's like my sister now. And now Buffy's not all alone anymore, with taking care of me and... and everything else she does... and it's just so mean to keep them apart! And Buffy and me don't fight anymore hardly. And both of us are real happy now, except for when we're sad 'cause we miss Faith. And Faith is nicer than almost anybody... and it's so cool that Buffy married her... and I'd do anything for her... and I just love her!"

Faith's eyes are watering too.

 

---

 

Faith's lawyer makes a few closing remarks after finishing with Dawn... and that's that. Now we wait for a decision. They could give us just one CV. Or they could give us full CV privileges again. Or... they could turn us down cold.

The panel did at least concede that Faith and Dawnie and I are a family. But they don't seem particularly persuaded about Faith's good character. Now it could be days–even weeks–before they file their decision. The three panel members look a little bit thoughtful, at least. Or maybe they just need a nap. But it's hard to be negative now... Willow and Tara's news changed the tone for all of us!

We have a few minutes together in the room outside, and everyone is talking and laughing and crying all at once–even poor Faith, stuck on the other side of some chainlink fence and feeling left out. We all hug the happy couple, and Dawn bounces around the room like a kangaroo!

"So who asked who?" asks Faith excitedly. "How did it happen?"

"Willow asked me," replies Tara, still wearing her permanent smile.

"In the shower," explains Willow, hugging her lover's waist from behind.

"Willow!" objects Tara, blushing.

"And she said 'yes.' In fact... she said 'yes' quite a bit as I recall..."

"Willow!"

Faith and I exchange smiles with just a hint of jealousy.

"So when's the date, you guys?" asks Faith.

Willow steps over and twines her fingers with Faith's through the fencing. "We're not worried about the date. There's no need to rush things. We'll probably have kids running around before we get to the actual wedding. It'll be worth the wait, though... an outdoor ceremony, chock full of Tara's white magicky goodness!"

"Why wait?" asks Faith. "It will be awesome, I know it! Dawn and I have had a little bet going, and I lose if you two don't get married this year." She winks at my sister.

Tara takes one of her fiancee's hands in her own and touches Faith's free fingers. "We have to wait," she says. "You see, we kinda have our heart set on you being there."

Faith opens her mouth to object–after all, she'll be in jail for five more years at least. Faith going home to her mom on early parole ain't gonna happpen. And Dawn's latest little scheme, to get Faith adopted by Giles, would have been pretty clever actually–if he was a U.S. citizen!

But Faith says nothing. She wants to be there just as much as they want to have her. And she should be! There might not be a wedding at all if it wasn't for her.

I butt in and take my wife's hands through the wires, as her lawyer offers congratulations to the witches. We press together from head to toe, as best we can. Actually, the way some of her softer portions press through the squares is... quite interesting. Please, please let the panel decide in our favor! The thought of standing face to face with my wife like this, and no fence in the way–or clothing for that matter–is almost too much to bear!

The guards are here for Faith now, and she is taken from me. We all wave, wishing she could stay a part of this impromptu celebration.

"Hey, Creature!" she calls as she goes, and Dawn stops hopping around Willow and Tara for a moment. Faith smiles fondly at her. "I love you too."

 

---

 

Faith looks at least as dazed as I am. "Those bastards," I breathe. "Too young to have CVs!" Every time I think of it my blood boils! Faith's lawyer wasn't surprised by the decision. She could tell we were fighting a losing battle. But the panel went one step further. They recommended that CV privileges never be considered for us again! Just as we feared, Faith's lawyer did too good a job of showing that the three of us are a family... a family in no danger of splitting up, even without any CVs. I can't help thinking of the lawyer's other big screw-up: writing to Faith's mom.

"I can't believe it, Buffy... no more CVs ever again. No picnics by the trailer, no sharing a tiny shower, no wrestling on the floor... none of it."

God, I will miss every one of those things! "And yet here we are, baby. One last CV. Your lawyer is smarter than all of them put together."

"One last CV..." she whispers, a faraway look in her eyes. My eyes follow my hands down every curve and swell of the woman I love. She's wearing the only outfit she has–other than her wedding dress. The one she's worn for every CV, a little frayed around the edges... and I can't imagine anything more beautiful. Tight pants, tight tank top. Black. She's lying on the bed looking up at me like it doesn't matter if we're in a prison trailer, a vampire's dungeon, or a palace. Only that we're together. And it's true. Right now, nothing matters but that.

I've had this same dream many times. Usually I tear her clothes away and make love to her with such force and passion it scares me. But it doesn't scare her. And she responds in kind.

Not this time. Our first kiss, when I stepped through the door to find her waiting, was everything I'd imagined. Long-anticipated and filled with such passion that we were gasping and writhing in seconds. But now that we're together in bed, it almost feels like we're underwater. Time seems to be running slower. I peel away my wife's top very slowly, unzip her pants, and remove them even more slowly. I lower myself onto her and clasp all four limbs around her. She fumbles with the zipper in back of my blouse, and I help her remove it. And my skirt. So slowly. Our motions tentative and somehow reverent all at once. I slip her underwear away and gaze at all of her. Her body is so beautiful... especially the parts that she has promised to me alone. But nothing can take my gaze away from her eyes for long. And when I'm out of my bra and panties, that sight doesn't hold her attention long, either. We relish the feel of our bodies pressed together, but our eyes stay locked, both of us afraid to even blink.

Her eyes are so vulnerable. Almost sad in a way. Dazed. We're both shaking a bit, strangely uncertain. This is not the perfect moment I usually dream of. Somehow that makes it all the sweeter.

I kiss her lips, and down her neck, and pause between her breasts. I close my eyes, overcome by the nearly-forgotten scent of my lover. That's never been in any dream. It's something I can hold on to and know that this time, it's no dream. This time it's real.

I caress her body, slowly, studying it. Studying her reactions. After all these months, I expected a hunger and passion that just aren't here. Something far deeper and more powerful has us both in its grip.

My hand is about to touch her sex, but she stops me with a light touch. "No..." she whispers. "You."

She's been so passive until now, so I give in to her one demand without question. I lay beside her with one leg raised, and let her fingers enter me instead. She moves them slowly, using her thumb in all the right places. Slowly... very slowly... I begin to writhe, held by her eyes as much as by her hand.

Tears begin to roll down my cheeks, mirroring the droplets of liquid running down her palm. I mouth her name silently because I have no breath. Something unbearably sweet explodes inside me. I hear someone crying out. I think it's me.

My body jerks in little spasms that fade gradually, and my wife smiles. We pull together into a tight, sweaty embrace, my wetness pressing into her hip.

I find myself caressing between her legs. She looks suddenly self-conscious, and I notice with surprise that she doesn't seem to be physically aroused.

I stroke her hair, concerned. She smiles sheepishly. "Having a bit of a dry spell, B."

Poor baby. "Not a problem, darling." I kiss her. "There's more than one way to get wet."

I kiss down her body until my face finds her barely-parted slit. My tongue provides the wetness, inside and out. Her eyes close and she relaxes. I breathe in her scent, savor her taste, and relish the feel of every fold and wrinkle under my tongue. Slow movements gradually become faster and harder.

After many minutes she touches my ear. "It's OK, B." I look up at her without pausing. "I don't think I have it in me tonight." She gives an embarrassed shrug.

"Don't give up yet, Faith, I'm just getting started!"

She smiles. "I can see that. It's... nice... really. But I'm not gonna come. Sorry."

I guess after all this time there is a lot of pressure to deal with. And it's true, her body hasn't responded to me much. I would taste the difference even before I saw it.

"Don't be. We can try again in the morning." I kiss her and her tongue slips into my mouth eagerly.

I wanted more for her on this night. The date is coincidence–we had no control over it. But it worked out that we're together on this night of all nights. Faith hasn't said anything. She probably doesn't remember. That's OK. Things have been a bit of a blur lately.

I reach under the bed and pull out a long box wrapped in silver paper, with a big silver bow. Her eyes light up. "You remembered! Oh, Buffy, I didn't get you anything!"

So we both remembered after all. "Well, being in prison makes those shopping trips a little tricky, I realize. Don't worry. I got exactly what I wanted: you." I put the package in her hands. "Happy anniversary, darling."

She tears off the paper slowly, opens the box and gasps. "Oh, Buffy...!"

She reads the engraving on the side: "To Faith, with love forever, Buffy."

She grins. "They must have thought you were nuts, bringing this in to get engraved!"

I laugh. "I think they maybe did. They made me pay in advance, and they fell all over themselves hiding it behind the counter before any other customers saw it!"

"I can't believe you got this for me, B, but it's awesome. Thanks. And happy anniversary!" She hugs me tight.

My first year of marriage wasn't anything like I'd ever imagined. But here I am with the one person I'm meant to share my life with. "We can try it tonight, if you want! Or you can just play with it on your own sometime... whatever you like." I had been hoping she'd want to try it now, actually, but she just nods, sets the narrow box on the floor again, and settles comfortably into my arms.

After some quality cuddling time I bring up the subject she's been avoiding. I wish I knew why. "So... do you think you're ready? We don't have to do it, you know. I just thought it would be a nice thing to finally share, on our anniversary." I refrain from mentioning how arousing it might be. Enough to get her past her little problem maybe?

She shakes her head sadly. "You can if you want. But I just can't. Not now. I'm sorry."

"Oh, Faith..." I squeeze her, beginning to realize just how much all of this has thrown her off her stride. "Don't be sorry. We'll both do it. Together. When you feel like it. I'm certainly not doing it without you on our anniversary!"

She nods. "Thanks, B. Don't know what's wrong with me. I don't think I ever want to get out of this bed!" She's staring at the window, something almost fearful in her eyes.

I hold her naked body to mine. A scared Faith is a rare thing, but I know I can comfort her. "I'm all in favor of that plan, darling."

And then she's crying.

"Baby! No... shhh...." I hold her head and rock her gently. "I can tell it's a hard time for you. I'm feeling a little stunned myself. But it will get better." I kiss the top of her head.

"Hell of a way for me to be on our last CV!" she jokes weakly, with a sniffle.

I lick the tears from her cheeks and kiss her deeply. "It's OK, darling... this one lasts a lifetime. And the slaying can wait until you feel ready." I tuck my quilt around her better and adjust the pillow that has waited empty beside mine for so long. "Welcome home!"

 

Continued with "CV-15"

 

I would be grateful if you would give me your comments and rate my stories in my Guestbook, or email me. Reader responses will determine whether I publish more stories, and will help improve them! Thanks for reading! (If you'd like to be notified when I post new stories, let me know.)

If you enjoyed this story, try I Have Never Been to Boston. Dawn sets out to say goodbye to someone she loves–but who she knows never even existed!

I miss her so bad. I need to see her again. Say goodbye. But she's not real. So here I am, to make that sink in once and for all. I have to see with my own two eyes that she never lived. That she never loved me. Because even I didn't exist.

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