Three's A Charm....Oh Yeah

I know all of you little KoRn Kids are probably growing evermore tiresome of my senseless ramblings. What is transpiring below me is NOT MY FAULT. I was not the one who made these GIFs. The biggest question about KoRn that I have ever had...the biggest "WHAT THE HELL?" in my books, my endless volumes...lies right below these words. Although, I kinda like it...

Kiss the Doily

See Head. See doll. See Head kissing doll's bum-bum. (This contributes to my theory about the REAL meaning of his name). 'Nuff said.

A.D.I.D.A.S. A Lil More Than A Catch Phrase?

I have many questions about KoRn, many I will never even discover, like life itself, but the following is this: "Who the fuck made this GIF?" I mean, at first, it's sexy. Girls can get off on it for a while. It's like a little home-made necrophiliac's delight starring James "Munky" Shaffer. I mean, even the video is great. When I first saw it my mouth dropped and I said, "Jesus! You dirty little bastards!" But to go out and make a GIF like this? Considering that 80% of KoRn's fans are male, this is rather perverted, I must say. Do you see any of the Fagstreet Boys gyrating at that rate of 80 humps/minute? I know there are some real horny KoRn fans out there...I'm one of them...but come on...There is ONE cool thing about it: He may be going fast, but he NEVER stops.

Every time you open up this page, you will see David start humping the HTML file YET AGAIN. I think these two GIFs were made to advertise David. Maybe Calvin Klein did it; they wanted to show that David was a MAN, BABY, YEAH! But no, that can't be right, because David and Calvin Klein didn't know of each other until FTL knocked everyone in the nuts. Obviously, David is bangin' something...And SEEMINGLY going harder than Munky. Can't Munky ever win, huh? Can't he EVER just make it PAST everyone else? The guy tries so hard...and then a locker falls on him...and then the director tells the stage-hand to tie Munky up in the cornfield...Some people only need a little assurance, so here it goes. You can do it, Munky. You can. Stand up and be counted.