should i be worried when Jake tells me I can be to much to worry about at times? I mean i hate being a burden to anyone and I thought he didn't mind me sharing and shit but. he didn't mean it like that I know but.. I. ok.

don't worry about it.

but, what everyone really does feel that way? cause I can be a bit much at once. to much of my voice, to much or my face, to much of my body, to much of my constant bitching. god. id hate me if I wasn't me, I think. that's sad. i used to have self esteem.

i think.

this week has been weird. monday and Tuesday were a blur, but Thursday night i rode downtown on a bus. figuring both 5's went the same place I got on the other 5. well they'd don't go to the same place. and for 2 hours I rode a bus round town. actually was kinda fun. lotsa photo op's. wish i would have had my camera

yesterday was busy, it sucked too I hated the morning but when i got home I went and had my first psychiatrist appointment. it was interesting, because she asked a question and i just talked and talked and talked and talked. we talked about music, life, friends, parents, photography, writing etc. just bullshit mostly. I'm scheduled for Wednesday, and then my birthday {:(} not fair.

after wards we went and got my book, "Brave New Girl". I'm on page 57 and i started this morning. it's a good book. very sarcastic. heh daria with real problems.

so after we did that, we went up to Racine. on the drive we, me and my mom, talked about stuff. we finally got into best buy, and buy me a CANON REBEL 2000!!! it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I love it. I also bought Mindless Self Indulgence cd, and we got a new disc drive.

and just today i bought 6 new pairs of tights, a new tee shirt, 2 new black lipsticks, new cool cheetah panties, Jack Off Jill "Sexless Demons and Scars", and new nose rings. my tee shirt is awesome, its Animal, done in glitter, and it says "Wild One". it was like 2 bucks, its tiny but I love it.

so now I'm broke and I have nothing left to say.

yours.

me