Stop in the Name of Goth

Road signs are a wonderful invention meant to control traffic and warn of potential hazzards. That's why I think we need them at our local Goth clubs. Just think of how much less "dance floor rage", and annoying situations would be avoided. Below are just some ideas that stem from the club night experience. Read them slowly. Do not speed. You will be ticketed.

WARNING : Moron standing in the middle of dance floor, not moving.

 

 Catfights dead ahead

 

 Remember, we're all individuals here

 

 Severe angst up ahead

 

 Caution, eyeliner is running

 

 Please, no light bulbs. Only candles.

 

 No ravers please

 

  Please, no pink

 

 Caffeine rush straight ahead (for those after club coffee junkies)

 

 Snooty goth chicks blabbing to each other about how bad you look in that dress.

 

 Stop bothering the DJ. He's not going to play your song no matter how many times you ask.
 

 Warning : Don't hit on my girlfriend. She will beat you up.

 

 Caution : Dum jock who's so drunk that he's unaware of being in the wrong club.

 

 Spikes prevalent. Dance with caution.

 

 Everyone smokes here. relinquish your lungs now.

 

 Happiness is discouraged

 

 oh, for god's sake GET A ROOM!!!

 

 Translation: This is the bathroom. Use it only if you want to glow afterwards, or are fascinated by the reproductive cycle of bacteria.

 

 And if we catch you doing this then you will be locked in the bathroom for the rest of the night.

 

 Please keep sunglasses on at all times

 

 

And if you have no sunglasses, please try to maintain a "GOTHY" stare as much as possible.

 

 Severely depressed zone

 

 Freaks welcome
 

Visit the Guestbook Archives
Page 1 Page 2

Hey! Careful with that thing!
HOME