Day Two
It turned out that I wasn’t the only one of us that had shared part of my evening with a member of the opposite sex - apparently Detroit grew them right because I found out at breakfast the next morning we had all met someone. Of course, with maybe one exception everyone else had different plans in mind for their female counterparts than I had with Maya. Howie had already enjoyed a night with the girl he’d met, AJ had spent most of the night with the girl he had met but supposedly nothing had happened and Brian was planning on meeting up with the girl he’d met later that day. Nick had met someone too, but once Brian told us she was a fan I pretty much wrote that off, because I was sure Nick already had. I didn’t actually tell anyone about Maya - I didn’t want the fellas to misunderstand what was going on.
AJ thought nothing of cheating on his girlfriend. Sure, he claimed he was loyal to a fault and that he always loved Michelle, but physically the boy was a walking hormone. Sometimes he tried to be good, most times he didn’t. Nick wasn’t as bad and his relationship wasn’t as serious as AJ claimed Michelle and his was, but he would still go out on the town with someone. Brian had been loyal to Trisha while they had been together (the same could not be said for Trisha, however), but now he was a drifter of sorts. And Howie...well, the last time he had a long term, fully committed relationship was about two years ago, so that’ll tell you a lot right there. As hard as it was I had been faithful to Bess since we had been together (and believe me, as great as my fiance was it could get really hard, especially watching and listening to these guys). I didn’t want anyone to assume that I had made plans with Maya on a level other than that of buddies hanging out.
But I shouldn’t have worried about it - the guys never had a chance to compete with the guilt my inner voice tried to instill in me. As much as I kept trying to convince myself that I hadn’t made a date with Maya that voice kept reminding me of the silence thing. I then tried to assure myself that that wasn’t really a big deal - maybe I had just misread that situation. Maybe it just meant Maya and I would end up being good friends. There was absolutely nothing wrong with making friends with members of the opposite sex, be you single, dating, engaged or married. Just because AJ slept with anything that had breasts, nothing between the legs and no facial hair didn’t mean everyone did. I didn’t, I had plenty of female friends. Maya was just becoming one of them. Just to reassure myself, though, during the drive from our last radio interview to our fan conference I rang up Bess.
“Lassler, Jenzen and Sheffley,” her secretary answered.
“Hi Marilyn, it’s Kevin, is Bess in?”
“Oh, hi Kevin. Sure, let me transfer you in.”
“Thanks.”
“Hello?” Bess answered a minute later, sounding tired.
“Hi there.”
“Hey sweetheart, how are you? How’s Detroit?”
“Missing you and lonely,” I replied, glancing out the window. “How are you?”
Bess sighed. “Swamped, absolutely swamped.”
“I’m sorry, I wish I could help.”
“Me too, but I’ll get through. I probably shouldn’t stay on the phone too long.”
“I understand, I just wanted to say hello and see how you were.”
“I certainly appreciate the distraction.”
“Glad I could help some, then. Now get back to work.”
Bess laughed. “Yessir.”
“I love you,” I said quietly.
“Ditto.”
“Talk to you soon.” Bess said goodbye and I hung up. That was the way our conversations went a lot lately - her being on the run or busy and me barely able to get three words in. I sighed and popped my phone back in my pocket. Just then Brian looked over, taking a swig of the Coke he held.
“Busy again, huh?” he guessed knowingly.
“Is there a time she isn’t?”
Brian shook his head then laughed. “Hey, remember when your end of the conversation was the ‘hi, gotta go, bye’ one?”
“Barely. Even when she was finishing law school she wasn’t this busy. It’s crazy.” For some reason right then I almost brought up Maya, but then figured that if there were ever a time that it sounded like I was trying to cure loneliness with the first girl that came along that was it. I shook my head and tried to put it from my mind. “So who is this girl that’ll be here today - the one you met last night?” I asked instead.
“You mean Andie?” I nodded and Brian smiled just a little. “She’s cool, cuz, she’s real cool. She’s just a little thing - real short - blonde hair, blue eyes.”
I smiled too. “Nice.”
“Yeah. Her friend - the one Nick was hanging out with, Cecily - she’s the more talkative one, really sarcastic and all that, but when it was just the two of us she opened up a lot more. She’s really innocent in a way, but in a way not too.” Brian shrugged and his smile widened. “It’s hard to explain but it’s very cool.”
“Sounds like a winner.”
“Yeah, I...” He looked as if he was about to say something big but instead only shrugged. “We’ll see, I guess,” he stated simply. I nodded my understanding. We talked on and off til we got to the hotel, of course surrounded by way too many screaming girls. Once we got to the conference room (stowed safely behind a curtain), Brian started getting all anxious in his trying really hard not to look obvious but instead looking painfully so way. He’d stand just out of view of the opening and lean back slowly as he talked to someone, peering out into the audience of about a hundred or so. He was in the middle of talking with AJ and I about something (although he wasn’t really talking, just nodding and staring), when a huge smile lit up his face.
“Holy crap,” he breathed.
“What? What’re you grinning at?” AJ asked, irritated that Brian had been paying no attention to him whatsoever. Brian started and looked at us.
“Oh, nothing. I’ll be right back,” he promised, then ran off. AJ and I looked at each other and shrugged, but a moment later Brian returned with Nick in tow.
“I know she’s here, Bri, I don’t need to see her,” Nick was grumbling.
“That’s not it, just check this out, you’ll never believe it.” They stepped up to the edge of the curtain and peered around it just slightly. “Front row, off to the left,” Brian directed quietly.
“Holy crap,” Nick breathed.
“No kidding, I told you,” Brian replied. Intrigued, AJ joined them but I wandered away, suddenly wondering what Maya was up to. I found a quiet corner and plunked down on the floor. I pulled my cel phone and wallet out of my pocket and fished Maya’s number out of my wallet. Hesitating only a minute before dialing I punched in the numbers. The phone rang once, twice, three then four times and I was about to hang up when someone finally picked up.
“This better be good, damnit,” an exasperated voice warned. It sounded like Maya but I was so taken off guard that I was silent for a second, then got my bearings back.
“Ah, is Maya home, please?”
There was a pause. “This is,” she said, sounding bewildered instead of angry now.
“Hi Maya, it’s Kevin.” Another pause then laughter.
“Oh my God, I’m so sorry,” she apologized through laughter. “I thought you were my stepsister - she’s called me twenty times in the past two hours, easily, and I was starting to go crazy.”
I laughed too. “That’s all right, you just caught me off guard. How are you, other than annoyed with your stepsister?”
“Fine, I had rehearsal this morning then ran errands, now I’m making some dinner. What about you?”
“Just watching Brian and Nick point out these girls in the crowd to AJ that they met last night.”
Maya coughed a little then excused herself. “That’s cool. When does your conference start?”
I checked my watch. “About five minutes. I had some free time so I thought I’d give you a ring, see what you were up to.” One of our people walked by and tapped her watch at me. I nodded. “So...are we still on for tonight?”
“Sure, yeah. What time do you think you’ll be through?”
“Um...I’m guessing we’ll be back to the hotel around six, maybe a little after.”
“OK, well, why don’t you call when you get back and we’ll work it out from there?”
“Sounds great. I better get going, it’s nearing show time.”
“Have fun,” she wished and I laughed.
“Always. Talk to you later.” With that we said goodbye...but suddenly there it was again, that fluttering that I had felt last night. Now I was worried - one time I could excuse, maybe just nerves at being around someone new, but twice was suspicious.
‘Your heart is trying to tell you something. Wake up.’ The message just appeared in my mind, one of those thoughts you have no control over. It scared the hell out of me and I wanted to get away from it - not that I could. Rather than try and wish it away I joined Brian, Nick, AJ and now Howie at the curtain as distraction. “All right, you’ve struck me curious,” I told them, putting on a grin. “Which ones are they?”
**********
The fan conference was pretty much like all other conferences except for the fact we were finally asked interesting questions. They came from the two girls that Brian and Nick knew and they ranged from “Is it true AJ really gets ruthless when he gets wet?” (which came from the dark-haired girl), to “Brian, can you give us your feelings on Easy Mac?” (from the blonde). The other girls there giggled at first but got annoyed when they couldn’t ask us about girlfriends and whatnot. They kept us laughing, though, and definitely spiced up what was normally pretty tedious and boring.
On a personal note the whole experience kept me pretty distracted about the whole Maya thing - while it was going on, anyway. During the ride back, though, that guilty feeling started kicking in again. My conscience told me it was wrong to spend any evening with any woman alone, no matter what the excuse. I didn’t think I should feel guilty - after all, I wasn’t planning on spending time with Maya to try and get her to sleep with me. I had a woman to fill the romantic position in my life, but just because she couldn’t be there didn’t mean that I had to sit alone and mope. None of the guys would be around, no doubt all off with their girls of the week. I liked going out, and Maya was a cool person that I just happened to meet. That was all. Right?
“Damnit, why am I debating this so much?” I muttered as I paced my hotel room. I glanced at the phone then stared at it. This wasn’t a big deal. I was just going to call Maya up and that was that. I had already done it once that day without hesitation. No big deal. I fished out her number and picked up the phone, then set it back down. “What is the matter with me?”
I picked up the phone again but instead of dialing the numbers in front of me I called Bess. Talking to her would make me feel better, it always relaxed me. The phone rang three times then the machine picked up.
“Hey, it’s Bess - I can’t--” But I hung up before the message finished and laid back, staring at the ceiling. I checked my watch - it was just after seven. Maya would be expecting a call. I had to do something so I headed down the hall to Howie’s room. I needed someone’s opinion - not that I wasn’t competant enough to make my own decisions but I liked to hear what other people felt sometimes. Howie was the only one that I really trusted - or at least hoped - wouldn’t freak out or make a big deal. He probably wouldn’t even ask any questions, and that was exactly what I wanted. He threw open the door with a bright smile after I knocked, then blinked in surprise upon seeing that it was me. I figured he was waiting on that girl he’d met (and I was right), so I kept it quick.
I tried to think of a way to word what I wanted his opinion on - I wanted to ask what the boundaries were that defined hanging out and more than hanging out, what was appropriate and what wasn’t. I wanted my phrasing to be subtle and intelligent sounding. “Howie, I know this is a really stupid question, but...how do you know if something is considered a date?” was what came out. I knew I had floored him so I tried a second time. “I know, I know it sounds stupid, but when is doing something with someone a date and when is it...not?”
He considered that. “Well, ah, I don’t know there are definite differences between a date and a non-date...I think it all depends on attitude,” he told me. I thought about that a second and agreed. That was the simple answer I had tried convincing myself of all day. God bless him, he didn’t ask why I wanted to know that (although I could tell it was killing him not to), and so I excused myself. Just as I left his “friend” Faith showed up and I saw what AJ meant about her being different than most girls Howie pursued - cute, but different. Once I got back to my room I immediately took a seat and dialed Maya’s number before I could choke up.
“Hello?”
“Well that’s a much nicer greeting than I got earlier,” I joked and she laughed.
“I know, I know - I get embarassed just thinking about it.”
“Don’t be.” I felt my smile widen...and again, the fluttering, only now a little more intense. “So are you ready to amuse a bored senseless pop star?”
**********
“So what sights can I interest you in?” Maya asked as we pulled away from the hotel.
“Whatever interests you,” I replied, smiling at her. She smiled too, not looking away from the road.
“Oh Kevin, that’s not a fair answer - people don’t find anything interesting about their hometowns, you know that.”
“That’s not true, I think there are interesting things about my hometown.”
She eyed me. “Really?” she asked dubiously.
I laughed. “Really.”
“Like what?”
“LIke...well...” I discovered right then and there that Maya was right. Sure, there was fun to be had at home, but when I was put on the spot nothing really qualified as interesting. “Well, we’ve got horses!” I finally offered in a cheesy announcer’s voice and exaggerated drawl. Maya laughed.
“I knew I’d bust you, I’ve been to Kentucky - I’ve got family there.”
I was surprised - she didn’t look like a typical Kentuckian - but I just groaned. “Oh, unfair advantage,” I claimed.
“Yeah, well, life goes on.” We were quiet a moment. “So anyway, is there anything in particular that you’d like to do?”
I shrugged. “I’m not too sure of what there is to do. Everytime I’ve been here I’ve just done the basics - Lions game, Pistons game, casino, shopping. I trust your judgement.”
“OK then...have you ever been to Second City?” she asked.
“Not the one here. I loved the one in Chicago.”
“We’ll try that then, all right?” She looked over and gave me a smile, which I returned as I nodded. We headed for downtown Detroit and I fired question after question at Maya. The more she answered the more I wanted to know. The drive seemed to only last a minute, just a blink and we were there. The show was great, just hilarious. Even when I didn’t exactly understand or find something funny (a lot of it was local humour), Maya’s laugh got me going. It sounds corny but it was so heartfelt and contagious - you just had to laugh along. After the show we headed across the street for pizza then back to the car.
“So what now?” she asked. I looked at her.
“What do you want to do?” I asked, hoping that she wasn’t ready to call it a night. She shrugged.
“Not much exciting is open, save the casino-”
“Pass.”
“I figured - or Denny’s. We could go visit my stepsister and her friends, they’re there til all hours- although, wait, never mind, she’s not there tonight.”
“Why’s that?”
Maya shrugged and looked out her window. “I think she has other plans,” she said simply.
“Oh, OK then.” I wasn’t sure what to say.
“If you’re tired I could take you back to the hotel,” she offered.
“Me? I’m only tired when I have to get up,” I told her, grinning again. She smiled too.
“You’re welcome to come back to my place and hang out for a bit then. Not too exciting, I know-”
“I’d love to,” I interrupted, smiling even wider. She gave me a once over and smiled as she started the car.
“OK then, we’ll go to my place.” And so we were off, talking up a storm again. It was funny - we asked each other all sorts of questions but none that dealt with having a significant other. Bess and I were common knowledge but I had no idea if Maya was single or not. ‘Does it matter?’ my rationale asked. No, it didn’t. It wasn’t supposed to, at least. When we got to her house and I felt my heart pound as I took a seat in her living room - I could have been at home, her style was so like mine. It was downright eerie. When she returned with drinks she laughed.
“Are you OK?” she asked. I took my seven and seven and shook my head a little.
“Yeah, it’s just that...wow, your decorating taste and mine are really similar. Like, I think this sofa is exactly the same as mine, except in blue...same with the armchairs...that end table looks exactly like mine, just that mine is in the den...and the coffeetable...” I stopped as Maya started laughing. I did too, embarrassed - I had started rambling. This was the second time in two days that I had been reduced to rambling by the same girl. What was this? “I’m sorry,” I apologized.
“No, that’s OK. That’s cool, actually - I’m almost relieved.”
“Why’s that?”
“Now I know that two years ago I wasn’t missing out on never seeing Kevin BSB’s house, I just had to look around mine.” She smiled.
I smiled too. “Kevin BSB?”
Now she looked a little embarrassed. “I spent some time in England during the end of my psycho fan period, so that’s how I’ve taken to referring to them.”
“Us.”
“Huh?”
I laughed. “You said referring to ‘them’. I was just saying us, as in me and the guys.”
She shrugged as she gestured towards the kitchen. “I guess. You want anything to eat?”
“I’m fine. You guess?” I was confused. She nodded.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
“You...don’t think I’m a Backstreet Boy?”
“No. No, I mean yes, I know you are, I just don’t think of you as a Backstreet Boy, just...” She shrugged. “Just as a nice man named Kevin, eh?”
I laughed again. “I gotcha.” She smiled. “And thanks, by the way, that’s more flattering than you know,” I added. It was too.
“Well, I wouldn’t want people to think of me as just Karen Flemming.” I cast her a strange look. “That’s the character I play in the upcoming show I’m in.”
“Oh. Cool. What’s the play about?”
Maya sat back. “It’s not actually a play, it’s a collection of monologues and short plays. Mine is a monologue called Pieces. Karen’s a woman that just lost her lover and the performance revolves around her talking to the body at the funeral home.”
“Wow, sounds pretty powerful,” I said softly.
“It is. It’s only a ten minute performance but it’s the hardest role I’ve ever played,” she told me. We talked about the theater more, mostly me listening to her experiences. I had struggled to get where I was but that had been a long time ago. I had forgotten how hard it was to get recognized in “the business”, and Maya hadn’t gotten her lucky break yet. As we talked Maya kept our glasses filled and after awhile I was feeling quite laid back and I could tell Maya was too. At one point I cast her a sly look.
“So you want to be on Broadway,” I began. She nodded.
“That I do.”
“Well, that means you can sing,” I reasoned. She nodded.
“I think I can, anyway.”
I grinned. “Let’s hear you then.”
Her eyebrows raised. “You want to hear me sing?”
“Yeeees...”
“Right now?”
I tapped my watch, still smiling. “No time like the present.”
Maya made a face. “I can’t just perform on command.” I cocked an eyebrow. ”I can’t!” she cried, laughing.
“Come on, you can and you know it.” I could tell she wanted to and that she was just nervous. I stood and grabbed her hands, pulling her up. “Get up - you want to, I want you to, let’s go.”
“Ugh, fine.” She allowed me to pull her to the other side of the room where her CDs (like mine), sat on shelves along the wall. “Give me a minute to pick something.”
“OK.” I glanced over her collection briefly, then at the few framed pictures that adorned the shelves around it. One immediately caught my eye, one of her and a man who looked a few years older. He had his arm around her and both were smiling widely. “Who’s this?” I asked, pointing.
She looked over quickly. “Oh, that’s Shane, my fiance.”
I realized right then that I was still holding her hand. “You’re engaged?” I asked as casually as I could, letting go of her hand to rub the back of my neck.
“Yup.” She smiled over at me. “Guess that makes two of us, huh?”
I put on a smile too. “Guess so,” I replied, heading back over to the sofa.
“Is everything OK?” she asked as I took a seat.
“Yeah, just getting ready for your performance,” I lied. She let out a small laugh and continued perusing. I had actually felt on the verge of falling for a moment. I couldn’t figure out why - well, that wasn’t exactly true. I was afraid to figure out why. I had a clue, an obvious, huge clue, but I refused to acknowledge it as the reason for my sudden drop in mood. After finally popping a CD in the stereo Maya turned around and smiled at me.
“All right, I’m ready,” she announced. I smiled again.
“And what will you be performing?”
“Jewel. You ready?”
I nodded. “Ready.”
“OK then. Don’t laugh.” With that she pressed play and Foolish Games began softly wafting from the speakers. The music was just loud enough to hear but it was Maya’s voice that dominated. I forgot my dismay momentarily - she was amazing. Easily better than most singers out there. I couldn’t believe it. As she sang my heart started to pound. I had never heard a voice that carried such emotion and I almost envied it. Her eyes stayed closed as she sang but I found that I could barely blink, my need to watch her was so great. When the song ended much too soon Maya opened her eyes slowly and glanced at me. “Well?”
I just shook my head. “I...that...wow. Wow.” We both laughed but I quickly sobered. “Maya, that was absolutely beautiful, it was just...incredible.”
“Thanks,” she said softly, bowing her head some. But I had to go on.
“You have one of the...how is that you aren’t making more money than me yet?” I gushed - I actually gushed. But I meant it, she was that good. She shrugged self-consciously.
“I don’t know, luck of the draw, I guess.”
“Just know that if I was in charge I’d put you in my place in a heartbeat.” She looked up and I gave her my most genuine smile. She returned the gesture.
“OK, your turn,” she announced, coming to take a seat on the couch. I laughed.
“I’m supposed to follow that? Right.”
Maya poked her toe into my leg gently. “Get up there, Richardson.”
“You were a psycho fan, you’ve heard me sing.”
She rolled her eyes. “No excuses. And no Nobody But You either,” she warned. I put my head back.
“Damn, now I’m lost.” She laughed and pushed me.
“Go!”
“Fine, fine,” I sighed, standing and looking down at her. “But you have to dance with me.”
“What? I can’t dance,” she protested as I took her hands.
“Just like you couldn’t perform on command?” I teased.
“But I really can’t dance.”
“That’s fine, I’ll teach you.”
“I don’t want to do any choreography.”
I let my jaw drop. “I’m offended, I know other dances.”
“Oh right, I forgot about that ballroom instructor thing,” she muttered. I pulled her to me.
“She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes,” I began softly, casting her a sharp look. She laughed but started dancing with me. I sang the rest of She’s Always A Woman as I twirled Maya around. When I finished I dipped her, afterwards taking a bow. She fell back onto the couch.
“Well?” I asked, grinning. Maya waved her hands.
“Too much of the spinning and twirling and dipping, I was distracted.”
I laughed and joined her. “I’ll pretend you said blown away rather than distracted.”
“You do that. So what now, karaoke king?”
I shrugged, yawning. “It’s completely up to you,” I told her. “I’m up for whatever.”
“Are you sure you aren’t tired?” I shook my head, although I was.
“Are you?” I asked her. She shook her head too, which made me happy. I just wasn’t ready to leave yet, I was so comfortable.
“Do you wanna watch a movie?” she offered.
“Sure,” I agreed, and so Maya headed over to her video cabinet. She read off title after title, but nothing seemed to sound right to both of us. After exhausting the possibilities she gave me a look.
“I’m out of movies.”
I grabbed the remote. “You have any premium channels?” She nodded. “Good, then I’m sure we can find some soft core.”
Maya laughed loudly. “What?” But I was already flipping through channels. This seemed like such an AJ thing to do, but funny enough it was actually me that had introduced him to the fine art of criticizing porn. In our younger, more trapped in hotels days the five of us’d do it for hours. It didn’t take me too long to find one that night and so I started. It took only seconds for Maya to start chiming in (she was excellent, but I found out she too had had practice). After a good two hours we were both fighting to keep our eyes open.
“Are you tired yet?” Maya asked through a big yawn. I started to answer with ‘not at all’ but a yawn stopped me so I just shook my head. “OK, you just let me know when you are.”
“OK,” I mumbled. My eyes started slipping closed again, but not before I saw Maya’s head repeatedly fall back and jerk back up as she fought a losing battle. I sat up some and guided her so she could lay against the arm of the couch, but she instead laid the other way, putting her head in my lap. I smiled and pushed her hair from her face, then sat back again and allowed my eyes to slide closed for good.
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