"No comprende 'Big Midgets'."

"We're so bad, we have to plug in our fans." As he plugs in the fan

"Come for the porn, stay for the music!"

"I said at the meeting that I'd light myself on fire!" Talking about the meeting for the Battle of the Bands

"I ain't got no time fo' no jibba jabba!"

"1 - 2 - 3 - 4!" In pretty much all of our songs

"Joe, you sound like a Chinese fish salesman."

"All three of us are glasses wearing." From our demo tape

"We are such assholes."