ࡱ>     !"#$%&'()*+,-./0123456789:;<=>?@ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ[\]^_`abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz{|}~Root Entry&Z O2@qA2CONTENTS Object 36F`O`A`O`AOle   "#&(),./2458:;>@ADFGJLMPRSVXY\^_bdehjknpqtvwz|}se people would by now know what a drunk regidia looks like. Glad everyone else looked like they were having some fun. More fun than I had... I completely forgot about my camera too so I don't even have pictures of that night. And I knew that my buds that      !"#$%&'()*+,-./0123456789:;<=>?@ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ[\]^_`abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz{|}~      !"#$%&'()*+,-./0123456789:;<=>?@ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ[\]^_`abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz{|}~      !"#$%&'()*+,-./0123456789:;<=>?@ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ[\]^_`abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz{|}~CHNKINK  TEXTTEXTvFDPPFDPPzFDPPFDPP|FDPPFDPP~FDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPPFDPP FDPPFDPP FDPPFDPP FDPPFDPCFDPCFDPCFDPCFDPCFDPCFDPCFDPCSTSHSTSHhSTSHSTSHh7:2:03==>Wednesday What I'll miss the most about my friends is the ability to just let loose and be kids again, no matter how old we are. We know when to be serious and when to be immature when we want. Hide and seek, video games, and just plain knowing how to relax and laugh loads. Sigh. I'll miss them. After all this errand running and planning for my transfer, the dust has finally settled and the sadness is beginning to kick in. I'm excited at the idea that I'll be starting a new chapter in my life, yet sad that I'll be closing an old chapter here. Then again, I'm not one to brood. I know from past experience that things always get better. Corny but true: "every cloud has a silver lining." No matter how fucked up things feel at the moment, you'll smile again one day and be content with your life. Word. Optimism. One of the cheapest drugs in the world. ;) 7:1:03==>Tuesday Fishing last night was fun. We didn t catch much except for live bait. Romeo, Romeo, Butch, Kristane, Christine, Jenie, Holly, Chantelle, and me. Rome took me driving today. I think I have the flat surface driving down okay, but when he made me drive on the hills. SHIT. It s so frustrating. Practice makes perfect, I guess; I just need to learn to be more comfortable with the balancing. Romeo was getting on my nerves for swearing so much. So unattractive if you know what I mean. But I guess if I really love him I wouldn t let something relatively minor get in the way of our relationship. But it can be so hard sometimes. I better jet. Laterz. 6:30:03==>Monday Sigh. What irks the shit out of me was that some people had told my boyfriend that I had been drunk. After two fuckin' shots?!?!? I was feeling JUNK not DRUNK. Big difference! After seeing me wasted a few times, you'd think the) usually always show face at the shindigs where everyone else usually bails on were in the same boat as me. You know... the ones I can get wasted with and not have to worry about getting too loud because I'm actually having fun with them? You know.... getting drunk together. The party sucked. I usually lose control of myself at my parties. Not lost control of the actual party. That was the first time I actually hated hosting. What sucked was that the people in the same boat as me also stayed with me to the end. Clean up and all. It was a minor clean up but just knowing we had to clean up after a party that none of had as much fun as we usually do at the house... SUCKED. I had more fun last night with Romeo's friends. I actually got to drink and laugh. I could actually let myself relax. PutanginangSHYET. On a side note... it was nice seeing everyone for the last time, I know I wouldn't have seen them otherwise. Thanks for coming. 6:29:03==>Sunday I was told how great my party was last night but in my mind the words,  NO IT WASN T was being screamed. Yes. Everyone looked like they were having fun but if anyone noticed, the guest of honor was stressing. I was worried that some were being a bit too loud on the wrong side of the house. I m just glad Mr. Wilson didn t call the cops on us and nothing bad happened--except for someone having to pray to the toilet gods. I did lose my virginity though. My mary jane virginity that is. It wasn t worth it. I should have just stuck with the liquor. Didn t even get drunk last night. FUCK. That was my plan. But NOOOOO. I had to babysit and worry that cops would pull up so I chose to stay sober just in case. FUCK. I should just have kept it more intimate so I wouldn t have to worry as much. DAMN. That was the worst damn party I ever threw. I was hoping to go out with a bang, you know... the last party I d be hosting until I get back, but I regret the night. It sucked. My last Saturday on the island before I leave for school SUCKED. Flip side: Someone gave me the Harry Potter book as my going away present. Other than that, my party SUCKED for ME. 6:28:03==>Saturday Last night was a good night. Romeo and I attempted to cook shrimp tempura. Not bad. His dad and his mom came in the kitchen and his dad started helping us out. Felt kind of weird with all of us in the kitchen just cooking. That was cool though. Romeo and I had to redo the shrimp though. Good teamwork. I love my bebe. After lounging in bed for a bit, Romeo decided to give me somthing. I didn't want it because I didn't want to get hurt by yet another odd gift. But when I opened my eyes he handed me this fake gold necklace with a fake pendant and a fake ring on it. At first I was like.. okay. I'm getting fake jewelry as my going away present. But then he explained to me that he had gotten those things for me for Christmas of '95--we weren't dating yet but we talked a lot. He said it was fake because that's all he could afford when we were that age. So sweet. I can't imagine him explaining to his mom that he was getting those things for a friend. So long time ago. I love him. So sweet. I wanted to cry because he made me feel that warm gooey feeling. Sigh. It hit me hard last night that I can't just pick up and leave. I'm really going to miss Romeo. Hopefully he flies up for his birthday. I'll miss him lots. My lover. My best friend. My boyfriend. My everything. 6:27:03==>Friday Rome is finally starting to get his butt in gear. I'm still worried for him. When I was his age I had to do most of this stuff alone. I hope he matures quickly and learns to ask lots of questions and have no shame to seek help. Especially with me and Manang not here to help him. I hope he does well in Calculus. Later. 6:27:03==>Friday Man. It s almost 1:00 a.m. and I just finished the loan stuff. So stressing. I m still a little irritated that my parents got sucked into the hype and sold my Accord for only $2500 but whatever. I need to just live and let live. I don t know why it s bothering me so much. I guess it s that feeling of getting jipped. What an asshole. If I have learned anything from this experience is this: when you are stabbing someone in the back ALWAYS remember to smile widely and speak sweetly. Yeah. Bum bye I learn. Went to the waterpark on Thursday with Romeo and Rocco. Fun. Got hooked up like crazy. Got a tattoo just to freak my dad out. I learned that I can get away with almost anything. I need to leave my dad alone. I m freaking him out for the fun of it and that ain t cool. My dad s cool. 6:25:03==>Wednesday I got a nightmare that my dad caved in and sold my car for less than $3000. He better not. The filipino guy is trying to bust out the "have pity we just came from the Philippines" bit. Riight. Money don't grow on trees and my dad has to work just as hard to earn them scripts. Grrr. We'll see what happens tonight. Apparently they're coming over to talk to my dad about it. 6:24:03==>Tuesday Donated blood yesterday. Arm is still kind of sore. The joint was pretty busy. I asked this guy about it and he said it's probably because of the free pint of ice cream you get. I just nodded and expressed shock that people would donate just for that reason. **WINK WINK**... whooyah. My arm is still kind of sore. Worth it. Worth it. But honestly though. I was going to donate blood before I left for Vegas anyway. The free ice cream bit was just a perk. I hope people aren't thinking I'm ghetto like that. A quarter of the time I acted like it was sore so I could score some kisses. You gotta do what you gotta do... Romeo let me drive his stick yesterday, too. Didn't die out once. Yay. I'm finally getting the hang of driving stick. Sigh. Yesterday was a good day. Ran a lot of errands and topped it off with some quality time. Today I got a physical. An all over physical. Doctor was cute but then... But shit. My left arm is still a little sore from donating yesterday. Right arm sore from taking a Hep A shot and having some blood drawn. Shit. School hasn't even started yet and I'm already suffering. USC sure has some crazy health recommendations. I better get going. Running more errands. I don't think there'll be a lot of liquor on Saturday. Just the hard shit. Any special requests lemme know. If not... ya'll are stuck with my favorite: TEQUILA. Food.... not sure. Do you guys really trust my cooking? Alright. Later alligator. 6:22:03==>Sunday Things between Romeo and I are going really great right now. I ve finally learned to relax and allow myself to love him for him. I leave in about two weeks. Greeat. I wish I had been able to make it to the Hawaii orientation so I wouldn t have to leave so soon. I hope I don t get homesick. 6:21:03==>Saturday Last night we had a little get together. The filipino mafia minus one. Chantelle, Els, Jenie, Mark, and me. Holly was also there. We watched a video. The date said it was taken around March 2001. Watching it made me realize how quickly time has passed and how different we all are. I noticed that back then, pre-Mark, I actually felt comfortable around Jenie and could laugh with no thoughts in my mind. Now it's different. I guess after all that she teased me about. Always made me feel that she had a nasty thought in her mind was going out of her way to make me feel bad. Now at get togethers I feel like there's some kind of glass wall between us and I can't seem to get past it. Oh well. How we've changed... After Chantelle and Holly left four of us were left to our own devices. Mark and Jenie on the bed, Els and I stayed on the floor. I was getting irritated when I began feeling like it was a two person party and Els and I weren't invited. I think that's why I get irritated with Jenie. Everytime Mark's around it's like we're all invisible or something. Maybe that's why I'm so mean to my boyfriend when we're with my friends. I don't want them to feel uncomfortable so I go out of my way to do the opposite of Jenie and Mark. Bleh. They're cute together but so sick sometimes. I'm beginning to feel detached from it all. I care but I don't want to care anymore. I'm leaving soon and I know life will go on, as always. Which is why I don't really care too much that I'll be leaving soon. I'm looking forward to meeting new people and making new friends. I guess I just want to get away. Laterz. 6:20:03==>Friday Fishing. Kris caught a stick fish. Romeo caught a puffer. Everyone else: O'ahu. 6:19:03==>Thursday Omigosh. The "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" book comes out on Saturday. Debating if I should go buy it at midnight. That's a little to nuts for me... psyche. I'll probably be there. Maybe. I've been waiting for that book for so long already. Dang J.K. Rowling. Hurry up with the rest of the series! I'd rather dish out the scripts for that book than all my other textbooks. The difference: Harry Potter ROCKS!!!! I'll probably save the book for my flight out. Yeah. Give me something super interesting to do. I LOVE HARRY POTTER. 6:19:03==>Thursday Sometimes I stare off into the distance and marvel at the fact that I'm actually able to see things so clearly. God bless science. God bless contacts. If it weren't for contacts I wouldn't be able to see anything clearly past an arm's length. It's kind of scary knowing how bad my vision is and that it could always get worse. I hope I can get my eyes Lasik'd. That would be tight if the procedure worked well and I wouldn't have to bother with glasses or contacts ever again. When I used to accidently fall asleep with my contacts on in San Francisco, I'd wake up the next morning seeing everything so clearly and for that split second I become overjoyed and pray to God that my vision had been improved to 20/20 overnight--then reality hits and I realize I fell asleep drunk again. Those with perfectly functioning five senses are lucky. No matter how many times I do fall asleep with my contacts the reaction is still the same when I awake. Wishful thinking I guess. What an "idjot." 6:18:03==>Wednesday So after Romeo took me out to lunch at this Thai place (yum), I treated him to ice cream. I can't believe he didn't like Pistacchio Almond! We went hunting for the fishing spot at Iroquois. This lady helped us out with that one. Maybe we'll go back there later. But too windy. Oh well. We got back at his place and all of a sudden his little neighbor crashes his bike and the incredible hulk comes to life. Romeo asked if he was okay. The kid looked like he was about to cry. Poor kid. So Romeo scoops him up and brings him to his house. He cleans the cut with water, I go over it with H2O2. After cleaning the cut up a bit we bring the kid home. He was shame to ask Romeo to carry him but we could tell he didn't want to walk. So Romeo carries the kid allllllll the way to his house with me trailing with the bike. My macho man. Sigh. So tender and so strong... cont... I just got back from my massage. It was very relaxing. More relaxing than the one I actually paid for. Sarah did a really good job. The best part was that it was free. Hook it up! It was kind of weird getting massaged by a co-worker but after awhile I relaxed and enjoyed it. I hope she can fit me in for another massage before I go. I hope Chantelle enjoys her massage as much as I did. I finally got access to my bank account. That s one less thing to worry about. I don t have to open a checking account when I get to L.A. Just need a savings account... So much things to do.. Sigh. I m tired. Mabuhay. 6:16:03==>Monday Shark bait today. Damn. I wanted to go bodyboarding too. Oh well. I heard it would be pretty crappy so maybe I'm not missing too much. Can't even donate blood either. Low iron level. My brother told me to just hook the needle up to the source. Asshole. That was gross. Maybe next week I can donate blood to get a free pint of ice cream. Chantelle said I should be donating for a different reason. What reason is better than getting a free pint of baskin robbins ice cream? Muahaha. Cheehu. G-hetto. Romeo and I went in analyzing mode again and I began to feel like our relationship was hopeless. But something always happens to make me feel like a super duper happy woman again. Something.. always... reminds me why I'm in love... Just the thought of eating at a fancy shmancy restaurant, all dressed up, Romeo leaning over to kiss me, he lightly licks his finger, and.. and... BAM gives me a fuckin' wet willy. I love him. If he does do that, I'll just retalliate with a finger up his nose. How you like them apples? Bebe? 6:15:03==>Sunday Last day of work. Yay. I guess I m throwing a little get together last week of June. Yay. Romeo and I are fighting. Nay. I guess I have this stupid tendency to expect too much. Geez. Make too much out of nothing. I'll apologize when I feel like it. It's gotta be the hormones--that and I can be a real BITCH sometimes. Met up with friends from high school at Marcelo s baby shower. Yay. Got the low down on most of our old ghetto ass K.O.I. clique and lots are pregnant/have kids/got married. Nay/Yay. Ain t my life. We re all adults here and we all have the capabilities to make choices in our life. Can t really feel sorry for anyone. As for the transfer... yay! lots of errands to run... nay! I hope I can fit in a blood donation while I'm in town. The blood drive is giving coupons for a pint of ice cream from Baskin Robbins to those who donate. I hope I can. I looooove ice cream. Cheap ass... Too bad I got my period today. Looks like no dawn patrol with Joy on Tuesday. I'm getting worried that there won't be any USC apts. or dorms still available so I'm starting to look for a place. Yeesh. 23rd and Toberman... I wonder if that's a super ghetto part of l.a. Ro told me to call Ate Claire if I need a room, but I think she lives too far for my carless ass to get to school. Sherman Oaks... what? Abu just moved to Glendale. Kinda looks far, but I'm hoping he'll pick my ass up once in a while to do something. Ooh. Alex too. My family rocks. I'm glad I'll be closer to a majority of them. Lots are near my age so they're all pretty fun to kick it with. Even the old fogies crack me up... especially my dad and aunty Elna. Muahahahaha. My friends should come over one time to see my dad bust his filipino rap, run the disco ball, and break dance. lol. nay! I'll be in the same state as most of the family, at least... Way better than MO. I'm so glad I'm turning 21 up there. Preparations are going nuts. I'm getting excited but kind of sad. But still super excited. It's weird how my family is already turning my room into a storage. They jacked my bed frames and replaced it with twin mattresses since they didn't want to store them anywhere else. So now I only sleep on half my bed since the other half feels too soft. Good thing it's a king. A/C has been installed in everyone's room but mines and my sisters. Our rooms already get a lot of breeze but still.. feels kind of weird not having what everyone else has... their reason: you'll be gone soon so no need. Riight. Happy Father's day. Tried getting my sister busted but I got busted in the end. Whoops. I love my dad. That was some funny shit. I bet if my sister was here she'd tackle my ass to the ground. Muahahaha. I'm still the favorite.. even if I get caught. Daddy's girl. Whoop whoop. 6:14:03==>Saturday Fishing was fun. I plan on doing it again. Cutting up the bait and actually feeling that whole circle of life thing got me thinking--why don't I start eating meat again? Maybe that's why my hair grows so slowly, not enough protein or something. It just seems much easier and it's irritating me always going out of my way to make sure the food I'm eating doesn't contain meat. I've lost my way on this semi-vegitarian path to no where. I've dropped my standards long ago and have already started on the path to eating meat again. I'm letting the little things slip through. I just need to get over the hump and actually stuff a chunk of meat into my mouth and actually swallow. It's just the sounds that come to mind that made me stop eating land animals in the first place keep telling me to stay the way I am. Maybe I'm just getting irritated with myself. My diet never makes sense to other people, that I'm beginning to wonder if it even truly makes sense to me. I guess I just need to remember that the guidelines I follow in my life, never have to make sense to others. But it's just so hard to explain sometimes. OR... maybe I'm just overthinking things--as always. I just need to chill out. I finally stopped stressing over my relationship with my boyfriend and actually got that lovin' feeling back again. All it took was a little tenderness and taking my mind off the little things that irritate me about him and just enjoying the time I have left. On another note. The ball is beginning to roll and I need to get my act together. 6:13:03==>Friday Throw a party. No. I'll just leave quietly. 6:13:03==>Friday I know this is kind of lame but I actually guessed correctly who the culprit was in Scooby-Doo. First time in all the years I've been watching that awesome cartoon. That cartoon rocks. So anyhow. Romeo and I spent time together yesterday. Finally. Sometimes I looked at him and this feeling of falling out of love came over me. What's happening to me? But then we had a wet-willy contest and we had fun again. I miss that. Stupid fun. I guess I'm expecting too much to happen in the short moments that we actually are together. Maybe I'm feeling pressed for time since I know I'll be leaving soon. I need to teach myself how to expect less. If you always expect way too much, you'll get disappointed. I think I overthink our relationship. I need to enjoy it while I can. 6:12:03==>Thursday Last night my brother and his friends came over to Romeo s house and we played someone out. This person supposedly drank 14 shots of liquor and didn t even palu the next day. No headache. No hangover. Nothing. He was able to drive well from Waikiki all the way back to the weSSide. How you gonna act? So anyhow, when my brother and his friends arrived, I was slipped the goods and prepared the first batch of shit. After tanking almost the whole bottle of the  Bacardi Limon and having a bottle of Bud LIGHT, the person that was getting played started to act all sleepy. Which is pretty understandable given that it was almost 3 am. To see what the punk would do next, Romeo prepared the second batch of shit but only made half a bottle of the Bacardi. After tanking that, the punk started acting a little tipsy. He couldn t even walk the line, when we made him do sobriety test. Drunk my ass. I guess a bottle of Bud Light, and three shots of rum diluted with TWO bottles of Lemon flavored water really can get someone drunk. Riiiight. We ll mess him up for real next time so that boy can really feel the effects of 14 shots of liquor. Fourteen. Psyeah. More like four shots and he ll hit the floor. Muahahahahaha. CheeHu. P.S. John sounded really cute when he yelled CheeHu after the Samoan performance at PCC. He s usually a quiet dude. 6:11:03==>Wednesday Okay. I paid for my ticket so it looks like I'm leaving on the Fourth of July. Got my haircut today for the heck of it. I kind of like it. I just wish I could cut more but I don't match with a short do. The guy who cut it said he had a wife but he seemed kind of feminine to me. Whatever. It doesn't really matter. He was really nice and cut my hair nicely. I need to apologize to Romeo. I snapped at him. I made a big commotion out of nothing. I should have let it slide instead of being so anal. I really am a bitch sometimes. Aren't we all? I know I shouldn't blame it on my period but if it helps... I get it next week. Baby shower for Joanne Marcelo this Saturday. I plan on going to see how everyone is doing. I hope less than half of them have kids. Friends. I wish I had the kind like my sister... likes to party but knows how to take life seriously if need be. Oh well. Gotta love life for what it is, instead of always wishing for something better. If you get too caught up in wishing for something else, you'll never be able to fully appreciate what you have. Later. 6:10:03==>Tuesday John, Grandma, and Auntie Elna left today. Sigh. Hope they had fun. I finally booked a ticket to Vegas. To save $200+ I'll be flying out on July 4. The crappy thing is that my sister will be heading to San Francisco that weekend so my cousin or one of her friends are going to have to pick me up and drop me off at the house where I'll be home alone. What a way to spend Independence Day--all alone. I'll be buying my ticket tomorrow. I wanted a later flight but I guess I better just take the ticket since it's such a great deal. Normally I'm glad to be getting off this rock. But this time it's different, much different. I don't even know when I'll be back. I want to cry but the tears aren't coming. I know I must be strong. I don't even know where I'll be for the Holidays. Probably San Francisco. I don't think I'll be back in Hawaii until next summer. A whole year away from home. I hope I don't get homesick and get distracted from my work. These next two years feel like they will be one of the many major defining moments of my life. Two years of major courses that I know I'll need to pass. I wonder what USC holds for me. I hope way too much stress isn't one of them. I know USC will be hard. But I just have to believe in myself. "When the going get tough, the tough get going." I just hope I'm tough enough to cut it out there. So much loose ends to tie up before I leave. I know I'll only be across the ocean but it feels like a world away. I wonder where I'll be a month from now... two months from now... six months from now... no where home, I know that much. Romeo is always working so I don't even know when we'll be able to spend time together. Whatever. If he doesn't want to take the initiative to do something with me then screw him. I'll just stay home and play Pac Man. I don't what it is with me and mindless/simple games. I guess I just don't need to think a lot. Thinking is too tiring. Friends... I wonder if they'll notice I'm gone. But then again, what friends? It feels like I'm dying soon and no one will even notice I'm gone. Geez. I'm beginning to scare myself. I know one thing is for sure. My dogs will miss me, but not as much as I'll miss them. I hope I finish my TO DO list before I leave. I better get going. Enough running my fingers. Middle finger getting sore. LatEr. 6:9:03==>Monday Polynesian Culture Center today. The Samoan presentation was the funniest. I'm exhausted. 6:8:03==>Sunday Legs sore. Made it through the day. Joanna them were here when I got home. She's so cute. I gave her my phone number so she can call me if she wants to go the beach. Yay. I have a new little sister. She's only 12. 6:7:03==>Saturday This chauffer thing is getting so old. How did I get stuck with this job? Thanks a lot family for helping out! It's almost midnight. I couldn't resist another update before heading to bed. My legs are sore. John and I climbed the Stairway to Heaven today. Yes. We went all the way to the top. 3848 steps (so it said). We made it to the top and back in 2 hours and 45 minutes. Not too shabby. Trying to drink loads of water and stretch a lot because I work tomorrow. Luckily I work at 11:30 am instead of at 7:30 am. My legs are going to be sore. While we were walking to the car this lady came out of her house and asked how we heard about the Stairs. I thought she was interested in climbing it or something, so I told her how I heard about it. She told us that we were lucky today. She had been calling the cops on the trespassers. Fucking bitch. Trespass THIS. We all know the Stairs isn't open to the public because of those damn sue-happy Californians. Whatever already. I'm just too lazy to type out the rest of this rant. I'm debating if I should even hike those stairs again. I'm getting worried about getting busted for trespassng. I'm not sure if I want to be pushing my luck like that... ahh. Next subject. So after we got back we washed up and headed out to Waianae to have dinner with family. Dang. Uncle Antonio's mexican food rocks. I was only limited to the Spanish rice and poke but at least the rice was awesome. I saw John going nuts over the enchilladas. There was a whole lot of other foods, too. Geez. I need to spend more time over there! Yay. I work tomorrow. My driving duty will be suspended for the day. Woohoo. Ugh. Legs getting sore. Good night. 6:6:03==>Friday Chatted with Karen yesterday. I'm getting really psyched to just pack up and leave. New things. New adventures. I'm looking forward to it--except the leaving friends part. So anyhow. Romeo and I watched Finding Nemo last night. Yes. I finally coughed up the dough and payed the high ticket price for a darn movie. Oh well. You can't take your money to the grave I guess. Romeo and I enjoyed the movie--it was really cute and funny. It was a great night. We haven't gone on a date like that in a while. Usually we just bum around at his house and give each other facials or just groom each other. The only time my hair gets brushed nowadays is when Romeo brushes it. "As long as you don't have uku's," right? Sigh. It's nice to see him working, again. The crappy thing is that he has less time to spend with me. Oh well. Whatever is best for him. I better get going. I wonder where I'll take the possee today. This tour guide thing is driving me nuts. p.s. karen's word of the day: contumacious - rebellious, insubordinate 6:5:03==>Thursday Just got back from the Arizona Memorial. That short movie they show before they send you out seems better than the recent Pearl Harbor movie. At least this time my Grandma didn't yell out loud, "I hate the Japanese for what they did." Shame... Sigh. I'm doing good. Chantelle's dogs are still alive so I guess I'm doing a good job taking care of them. Her dog George is on crack. He's so old already and he's still a fetching freak. As soon as I see them he's got his toy ready to go. That little dog makes me tired. George likes to run while the other two just chew their bisquits. Taking my family around is sure making me tired. I'm racking my brains trying to cater to all their needs. Jeez. 6:4:03==>Wednesday Trying to fly to Vegas by July 10. One-way air fare kinda expensive. Karen if you're reading this... can you tell me when you'll be on-line because I want to ask you a few things. Okay? Okay. Gotta go take my family around the island. I hate giving these tours. I don't really know much about our 'aina! 6:3:03==>Tuesday Romeo shot me in the shoulder last night with his air soft gun. Asshole. I was only shooting him with water while he was trying to sleep. I wanted to pull over to the side and just kick his ass. What kind of guy shoots their girlfriend point blank while they're driving? Grouchy MoFo. Now I have a welt on my freakin' shoulder. Shit. 6:2:03==>Monday I received a Presidential Scholarship from USC. The crappy thing is that they reduced my University Grant (from ~11k to a little over 4k). But all in all, the scholarship does help to reduce the final bill, so I'm thankful for that. Presidential Scholarship... HPU to USC. Muahaha. Holding by breath and vehemently wishing for the Presidential scholarship from USC as I go through the Pali on the HPU shuttle really does work... that and faith in God. Sigh. School is still going to be SUPER expensive but oh well. I'm looking forward to getting off this rock and living on my own. I'm getting Island fever. I need to get away. Anyhow. We were driving through Nanakuli to get to Auyong Homestead Road, where my dad them used to live. When the question was asked, "Do you go to church?" NO. I don't go to church. Does that mean I'm going to hell? Does that mean I love God less then a usual church goer? I haven't said a standard prayer for a while... a looong while. The Our Father, and the Hail Mary just don't cut it for me. Mass. I can't really say anything nice about it, so I won't say much. I just don't get that "I love God" feeling from mass. Sitting down, standing up, singing, and what not during mass doesn't feel very spiritual to me... it just makes me bored. It's just like the priest is playing follow the leader with all the church goers. It's as if church is a place to just show face and try to make like your into God and stuff. It feels like a lot of them are just posers anyway. Going to church.. some people probably go just because they think it'll help them be a good person, or they were told it is the right thing to do. Church is good for some people.. so good for them. But it's not all that for me. Isn't religion INDIVIDUAL? I don't need to go to mass to know I love God and learn how to be a good citizen. It's almost like the same message every week anyway: BE GOOD. Whoopdeedoo. I don't need to go to mass to know that! So I don't go to mass. So I don't believe in all aspects of the Roman Catholic church. Humans screw it up anyways. I don't need some middle man preist telling me to say certain prayers just to make up for any sins that I had committed. My religion is between me and God--not no church. I may seem unholy right now but I don't give a shit what others may think... especially my parents. I pray every night. That doesn't mean I'm more faithful than the next person but so what! Again: religion is individual. I like my relationship with God. I can talk to him as a mentor. I may not say the typical prayers but what I say to him is the truth. So what if I don't go to mass and I don't completely believe in the Roman Catholic church? So what? Parents getting on my case just because I'm not confirmed. AND? SO? It's not like all the people that have been confirmed are model catholics anyway?!! I'm sure a good chunk of them have popped out kids already... premarital sex--is that how a confirmed catholic shows their goodliness? Ahh. Whatever.. Bunch of posers if ya ask me... 5:31:03==>Saturday My brother realized he had to shave after we passed Kapolei so we made a pit stop at Allan's house at Summer Hill(?) so he could borrow a shaver. Allan and I did a little catching up while my brother was shaving away. My brother is pretty ghetto. Using someone else's razor... he even used Romeo's aloha shirt to his senior luau (the same one Romeo used to our senior luau three years ago!). That's cool. Saving money will never go out of style. But still... there are other ways to save some scripts, you don't have to bum like that! Went to James Campbell High's graduation last night. Dang. That class racked up a whole lot of scholarship bucks! Congratulations to the JCHS class of 2003 and the rest of the other schools, too. Being at the graduation made me feel "old," for lack of a better term. Caught up with Add and Danya. When I asked how they were doing, Add just whipped out Danya's hand to flash me the bling blang on her ring finger. SWEET. I felt all warm and mushy after that. Romeo and I tag teamed to get that couple together. A whole lot of lying and a whole lot of bbq's just to get those two together, but it was all worth it--obviously. Setting people up IS worth it. Congratulations to them. Oh and Happy belated Birthday to Chantel. Her Karaoke party was fun. Someone got drunk after only two SMIRNOFF ICE! They probably felt it so quickly because they had an empty stomache and they tanked that shit. Maybe. Speculations lang. Sigh. Saturday. I better go. Need to run errands with my relatives. I'm the designated chauffer for today, since my parents ditched out. In the words of Adora, "Peace, love, and hair grease!" 5:28:03==>Wednesday Jacked this from an e-mail from my Chemical Thermodynamics and Kinetics teacher: "Hope you are enjoying your summer.Your final exam grade was 57%, but I gave a 5 pt curve, so that was a strong C. Everything else was good, but the final brought you to a B+ overall. Thanks for taking the class seriously, even though it was pass/fail. I hope it helps out if you take P Chem in the future." Cool! A 57% on my final. I wish I could get that back and frame it. It's funny how I had a whole lotta crappy test scores in all sorts of classes but still pulled out with good grades. God must me smiling down on me. So anyway... Yesterday was our 7th year anniversary. We went low budget this year and cooked each other food and had a little picnic in the park. It was cute watching him pretend he liked my ahi even though I know it tasted nasty. What a sweetie. Then we exchanged gifts. I hope he liked what I got him. So after seven years, we've called it quits. Hope he's happy and realizes that it's for the best. Or am I just being a snobby dumb ass? I'll love him always. No matter what he thinks of me. Maybe I'm destined to live a single life forever. Oh well. I'll get a dog. Maybe we'll work it out, maybe not. We'll see... 5:25:03==>Sunday Worked 11.5 hours today. Feet sore. I'll survive. Talked to Neslyn today. USC here we come. Listening to her made me realize that for the next two years I'm not going to have any social life, like I had one in the first place... So much to do. Gotta find a roomie in the USC area. I don't want to dorm. If anyone knows anyone who needs a roomie please let me know! It's so nice to know where I'm really going this Fall. Life is good. More later. Tired. See you all at Chantelle's. 5:24:03==>Saturday My head hurt a lot today. Tried to sleep to alleviate the pain. Romeo took me and James to Kewalos. I banged my knee against the reef on the paddle out. Sucks. I thought I was going to drown on my first wave because I wasn't sure which way was up and I was scared the whole time because I didn't want to get slammed against the reef. The ankle leash sucks. All in all. It was a good day. Didn't go to Maricar's sister's graduation. Didn't go to Jason's graduation either. Too tired. Head hurts. Felt like there was a constant suction on my right temple. I'll live. Melissa's x-rays came out good. Nothing that warrants a surgery so that's always a good thing. I work 7:30 a.m. tomorrow. Damn. I need the money but I need sleep too. Oh well. I will survive. I only work one day a week so I better just SUCK IT UP. Orgasmed today. Finger style. Romeo worked the hole, I worked the clit. Yummy. 5:23:03==>Friday Life is good. The wait was worth it. Now comes the hard part... 5:23:03==>Friday I'm feelin' GRRRRREEEAAAAT! Just got accepted to USC. yi YI! Now comes the hectic part of scheduling... orientation.. and of coure: figuring out how to pay for it all. yi YI. 5:22:03=>Thursday Waiting for Romeo to finish showering. Had dinner at his brother's house. Man. He can be so mean sometimes. It's cool. The balatong Rally cooked was grrreat. Romeo and I finished our game of monopoly. I finally won a game by default: he tried to cheat by jacking $500 from the bank. Score 6-1. Pretty stoked. Just looked on the oasis thingy and they had my financial report ready. I'm pretty sure I didn't get the Presidential scholarship though, but I was given a grant. Romeo and I will look over things later to see how much more expensive USC will be compared to WUSTL. God. I know I haven't received the actual letter yet, but my hopes are soaring. Yet a snag in my heart is telling me to be weary, because nothing is guaranteed and I could just be setting myself up. But still. Sigh. GOD. PLEASE LET IT ME FINANCIALLY SIMILAR. Another day and the mailwoman still has not handed me the one thing that I m looking for. Everyday it s the same old thing. Get my hopes up as soon as I hear the mail truck. I don t even leave my house until after I know what s in the mail. And when I do come home that feeling of hoping that the envelope that I m waiting for is sitting on my bed and waiting for me, no longer exists because I already know... the envelope was not delivered today, I know because I already waited earlier that day. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. It sucks. I try to do things to help me take my mind off of waiting, but for that split second when my mind wanders, I always ask myself... WHEN? And yet again, my mood just turns sour. Sigh. I watched Lilo and Stitch the other week. It irritated me to see how the characters were drawn. Notice how the female characters were drawn with thick legs? What are the cartoonists trying to say? Everyone living in Hawaii has thick legs or something? I know I have thick legs, but the characters in Lilo and Stitch sure looked different from other Disney characters. What people living in Hawaii look different from people living on the continental U.S.? Whatever. It s just a cartoon Regidia. Cool down. My grades. Not bad for cutting a lot and lack of motivation/concentration. Straight A's marred by an A- in Anth. Whatever. Minuses always suck. What the heck? Blah blah. The semester's over. That's always a plus. Don't ever have to see the Greek wench. Ever again! Well, I finally met his cousin s girlfriend. All I can say is that listening in on her and Romeo s conversation the words,  HIGH SCHOOL kept flashing in my mind. Soooo immature. Remember all those games couples would sometimes play in high school?.. He said.. she said... tell them this, tell them that... the lies, the language, the gossip... geez. After she left to go to her friends house, Romeo and I just hugged each other and counted our blessings that we re not with someone who still acts like they re in high school. Romeo told me he was glad I act like a different kind of kid--an elementary one, not a high school one. God. Some people just need to GROW UP and act their age, not their fucking shoe size. Just feeling bitchy yet again. Why the heck is it taking so freakin long for them to let me know if I ve been accepted or not. Whatever. Losing to Romeo AGAIN doesn t help my mood any. The Monopoly score is now 6-0. How the fuck can I lose that much? It s not like Monopoly requires a lot of thinking. Fuck it sucks losing that much. FUCK. We re playing again today, I m not stopping until I win at least one game. I have to beat him in something. DDR. Yeah. Maybe I can beat him in that! 5:20:03==>Tuesday Shoot. Got my ma i today so I couldn t go to the beach. Romeo gave me a new used body board and I wanted to try it out so bad too. Darn it. There s always next week. Chantelle, Jenie, Leilani, and I went to get rubbed down today. I m addicted. I know where I ll be when stress levels get up there around midterms and finals. Oh yeah. It was a good experience. We had lunch afterwards. I kept asking this guy if there was meat in some stuff. He was helpful and nice. He kept laughing at me every time I went back for more food. Probably thought I was jacking food or something. I got a picture of Chantelle trying to steal Lei s car. Dork. Good day. Girls day. Fun day. p.s. finally got to ride in jenie's pimptress mobile. 5:19:03==>Monday At Mark's house now. Next stop: Chantelle's. Jenie just lost the sex game. Too much bootie spankin' 5:18:03==>Sunday Where to start... where to start... Maricar came back on Thursday, thank God she arrived safely. Went to Zippy s that night. Interesting as always. They crack me up. I wish I had friends like that in high school. You know.. friends with substance? Hehe. Just joke. After we called it a night Romeo and his cousin were there. Long story short: I almost banged Butch s bmw because they blocked me in my stall trying to force me to talk. When a girl doesn t feel like talking, leave her alone, especially me! Somehow I got around it. Thank God I can drive backwards pretty decently. I had to call Romeo s mom to make them leave me alone. She kept asking me to just talk to her son. Kind of weird having his mom try to help us work it out. I was terrified they would cause a scene at my house. I was almost ready to drive to Makaha or something because I didn t want to get out of my car. But I just drove straight home and parked my car in the garage. Snobbed the shit out of them as they watched me go home. Kiss my ass fookers. It s kind of weird turning to Romeo s mom for help. Romeo was in disbelief when he realized his mom actually lied to him to cover my tracks. I never realized she liked me so much. What a sweet woman. I hope things get better for her. Okay. Even if we were not on the best terms since I was still pissed at him for what happened at Zippy s, I still made it in time to Romeo s graduation to lei him... twice.. Muahaha. I don t think I would have been able to forgive myself if I missed even the end of the ceremony. Butch kept trying to high five me, but I wasn t having it. I was so irritated with him. All I can say is  yuck. That night I ended up at his house. His family was over to celebrate his graduation. Congratulations Romeo. Somehow, I got stuck with the job of checking in on the kids. The older kids weren t so bad because I got them to play Bust a Move; the toddlers, on the other hand, were a pain in my arse. I eventually ended up knocking out on the couch. Some babysitter I am. Falling asleep on the job is never a good thing. Luckily nothing broke. Just a spill but I cleaned it up. Kids. I m glad I don t have any! His family kept remarking how good I am with kids. Bullshit. I love dogs better. Less stress. But there will come a time, so they say. Last night at my aunt s house was good clean fun. No one got really drunk. I didn t even have any. It IS possible to have fun without getting liquored up. Poor Melissa had to go to the hospital because of stomach problems. Doctor said it might be gallstones. Hope it isn t because I know she isn t exactly comfortable with the idea of getting hacked open. Fruits and juice for her today. Good luck to her. Twister... hahaha. Sooo retarded. Monopoly. By the way--the case of the missing car has been solved. Kris was stowing it away in her pant leg. Gotta be from Big Island, ai sus! DDR. Me and Kris barely passed a lot of stages. You go Els and Joy! Work that pad! I told my parents about  Mr. Wilson telling us to shut up. My dad told me that I should have told him to shut up. He was going off and talking about lugging his stereo system next door and blast the shit out of it until exactly 10 pm, just to piss off Mr. Wilson. I hate him. Ever since I was young he has been my neighborhood adversary. Grouchy old scrooge. All in all I had fun spending time with good people and I m glad Romeo and I finally resolved our Filipino drama. We haven t really kicked it like that for so long and Romeo and I haven t been on the best of terms for awhile. Well, it s summer time so hopefully we all can find the time to spend together. Sigh. I m so tired. Social activities are so taxing. Need to sleep. 5:15:03==>Thursday Sooo much drama. It's like I'm living in a filipino movie or something. Someone needs to just chill... I don't need that in my life so that part of me is dead right now. He's not talking to me and I'm not talking to him. I felt so ashamed sobbing like crazy right in front of his mom. I felt even worse when she apologized to me for letting her drama leak into our relationship. It has nothing to do with her. It's the way I look at him when he's dealing with anger. It's like he thinks of himself as some gung ho warrior who can take everything on by himself and treats everyone around him like they're the enemy. Whoa buddy. I'm just trying to help. I hate the way he forces me to spill my thoughts to other people. He doesn't understand the word PRIVACY or something. When he does want me to say something but I don't want to say it, he jumps around like a monkey and throws a fit. "No I don't want none of your type." Sigh. After I recovered my car keys, his mom let me go home sobbing my ass off. I ended up at hana sushi picking up some food. $15 for a total of eight pieces of sushi. Dang. It wasn't even that good, I should have gone to aloha instead. The sea urchin wasn't even worth the money. Not as good as I remembered it to be, but an awesome way to eat a mouthful of $3. I felt kind of weird walking in there with my eyes still red and puffy, but a girl's gotta eat. I almost feel over because their floor mat near the entrance, damn platforms. Thank God my ankles were strong enough, so I didn't fall over. Paying for the stuff was a trip. The clerk was so respectful, handing everything to me with two hands. Cultural differences are always intriguing. Differences are good. Differences can drive two people apart. Language barriers, temperature preferences, eating habits. Sound familiar? 5:14:03==>Wednesday someone SHAVING their legs at JAMBA JUICE along the WAIANAE COAST and finishing at KO'OLINA where there was a VOLLEYBALL game with three players, "MONKEY, TREE, ROCKETSHIP" where they all got FACIALS. that's how the day went with the pole polisher, the long john, and gucci vespucci. Afterwards they went to the HPU graduation. Romeo and I finished playing the monopoly game. current score: 3-0. 5:13:03==>Tuesday Just got 31/34 on this loan quiz that WUSTL makes you take. Not too shabby for just guessing. 5:13:03==>Tuesday Monday: gave the dogs a bath. Slept and ate for the rest of the day. At night I played tennis with Els, Jenie, and Mark. It's been awhile since we all played together. We kicked it at Elson's house after that. Watched some interesting videos. All I can say is OUCH. Bigger is not always better. Muahaha. That was funny. My ass is sore from playing tennis. Tuesday: went to the beach in the morning. Didn't catch much because I suck. I'm supposed to go and volunteer today but I don't feel like it. Too lazy. I think I'll just be a bum and go over to Romeo's house later to play monopoly. Nothing really interesting to write about. Just updating for the heck of it. Romeo and I are still in a rut. He's beginning to threaten me. The "you better watch who you're fucking with" just doesn't sit right with me. If you want to woo a girl, at least be nice about it. I guess we just need to spend some time together. Usually always works once the communication lines are opened. Sigh. 5:11:03==>Sunday Last night I went to an o.chem party. I m usually not into those sorts of things but I figure I have nothing to lose, so I might as well socialize. Felt a little weird with Dr. Horgen there but I don t regret going. Socializing is fun, even if I m not good at it. After that I met up with a few friends to kick it at Starbucks, then off to Zippy s. It was fun, but I couldn t shake this feeling of being an outsider. I m just shy like that. I guess I m socially inept. Not guess. I am. This week Friday Romeo graduates. I m trying to plan a little game night this week Saturday. But I think I m cutting it too close. I m just getting into another rut I guess. Everyone is irritating me and it s not their fault. Why does it feel like I always have to choose? Why can t he understand that I have to spend time with others as well? why? It s weird how it feels like I have these outer body experiences and look at myself, and wonder...  are you happy? I guess slowing down to think about the real stuff will always bring a person down. Concentrating on your weaknesses is never a good thing. I ve brought Romeo into my loop of despair. I was just about to talk about my fears of not succeeding when he just cuts me short and just started to accuse me of wanting to be with Hank, or vice versa. I don t need to be questioned. I don t need that in my life. For some reason I feel like I just want to lie down and die. Even after reading star_e_boi s site about me, I still feel like I m not good enough. Not good enough to attain true happiness....have descent friends, a boyfriend who loves me, who truly loves me and wants what s best for me. Sigh. What a shitty feeling 5:10:03==>Saturday Twelve+ hours and 29 pages later.... I'm done with my O.chem report. I finished it at about 7:30 a.m.. Report was due at 9 am. No sleep for a whole night. I was lookin' good. The cold toffee nut latte, four extra shots of espresso, a shot of caramel, and loads of liquid sugar into one drink helped me pull through. But I started to tumble when I was heading to HPU on the H3. Scary. I got home and slept for about two hours. I guess the caffeine still had a hold on my body. I couldn't go back to bed, even though part of my body knew I needed it. I talked to Christine and Chantelle. They pulled all nighters as well. Damn O.chem lab. Christine had the same problem as me... couldn't go back to sleep so she was trying to clean to pass the time. Man. Caffeine and its effects... I went with Romeo and his friends to the super brawl thingy over at the Blaisdell last night. Third row lower level (not ground), baby. His friend grapples with eegan inoue so we sort of got hooked up with cheap prices. Awesome view. The main event.. inoue vs. suga was only 27 seconds long. Suga knocked the shit out of inoue. Enough said. Vince took us out to a bar where we met up with more of their friends and stayed till 2 am. My boyfriend and I are still only 20 so I was shittin' bricks a little. They told me to order something but I was a chicken. We told the waitress we were with A$e so she asked casually if we were 21+ and we both said "yes" so she just took our orders. I felt kind of bad lying but she should have asked for id's. nah. I'm glad we didn't get carded. I only ordered a shot of tequila gold. I usually take my tequila straight but I was wishing I hadn't after the shot. I REALLY felt it after I gulped, what felt more like two shots. I have really low tolerance as it is. With that taken into account, my lack of sleep, and my empty stomache... my head was spinning. What a good feeling. I'm a really good bar drinker--I can get drunk cheap. When I looked back at the table... Ricky had placed another shot of tequila in front of me. They were all encouraging me to suck it up. The salt on the rim was really enticing but I know my limits. I held my ground and gracefully declined. So I gave the shot back to Ricky and he had to drink it. "I'm not going to drink tonight"... my ass. It took him a while to gulp it, but he took it. Just the three of them sang a little karoke too. That was some funny shit. Threesome action. Trying to sing slow songs.. mUahahaha. So that was the bar scene last night. Very, uh, interesting. On the way back to Romeo's house, he kept talking shit about being the monopoly champ. So as soon as we got back to his place we played a game of monopoly. He almost lost, but he mortgaged some of his property to pay his bill so he was saved. It was already 4 am so we vowed to finish the game some other time. We placed the stuff back carefully so we both know where we stand when we continue it later. He better not cheat on me when I leave. During super brawl, his cousin's girlfriend called him up. She's kind of irritating. She seems so rude. Calling their house at all hours of the night--no shame. There are other people in that house that have to sleep! She even calls Romeo to track her boyfriend down. Psycho. So back to my story... she called Romeo to ask something about his cousin. Apparently he didn't come home the other night because he was sleeping at another girl's house. Yeesh. Naughty. Romeo told me that he would do the same thing if his girlfriend wasn't there. I elbowed him a mean one. He told me he was only joking. Whatever bitch. Cheat if you want, there are other guys out there. I know he won't cheat so I guess it's easy to joke about that kind of stuff. But still, sometimes it irritates me because I have to wonder why he even has that kind of stuff on his brain. Sigh. So Hank called me up asking if I heard anything from USC. He got his acceptance letter this past Wednesday. I have no comment on this subject. I've already whined to enough people about this. Thanks all. I'm officially on summer vacation. Cheehu. If you've gotten to this point in my usually long and boring blogs here: Board game party my aunt's house next Saturday? BYOB. Small affair. The smaller the more intimate. Hope it's not as boring as the other little get togethers! p.s. I just got word that I am a Peter Papworth scholarship recipient. As soon as I got the news I was about ready to cry. He was my favorite and most inspirational teacher so I think it's befitting that he's still helping me through my educational career, even if he has already passed. I still have the poster he gave me, "Now I lay me down to rest, A pile of books up on my chest. If I should die before I wake, That's one less test I'll have to take." I feel really blessed to have had the opportunity to have Mr. Papworth as a teacher. Campbell really does have some top quality faculty members! (8:6:02-private) Oh well. I better get going so I can go check into a hotel room for my brother and his friends. $40 profit for putting down my credit card... not too shabby. Not too shabby at all. 5:9:03==>Friday What a good damn time to have writer's block. It's already 3:45 am. I'm tired. My back is sore. And I've been working on the discussion for this report since 10 pm... Thursday. I'm analyzing my last unknown. I'm going nuts. The end of the semester is so close, I can feel it. Just have to write for about one more hour. HHAAAAAAAAA. FUCK. I didn't work on my report earlier today because me and Els spent some quality time--shopping. I even got to ride in his new pimp-mobile. Dang. His SUV is so nice. Still has the new car smell and everything. Sigh. Nice ride Els! Man that guy is so hooked up. He hooked me up with a jamba juice, treated me to a pretzel, and even gave me a starbucks coupon. He's probably the most generous guy I know. When we were heading back to the weSSide I realized, just by seeing his Look @ Us cd cover that so much time has passed since freshman year of college. dang. Els and I "re-met" on the first day of school at HPU. I was walking around Ft. St. mall all lost and confused when I see a face in the crowd i actually recognized--the goody goody boy I had in ccd classes--lights were flashing in my head: goody goody two shoes... goody goody two shoes.. but as i got to know him... i've learned that he's totally the opposite. muahahaha. as he pointed out this semester--hell has frozen over and he's taught me so well how to cut class. i even cut more than him this semester. friends and their influence... ai sus! goody goody my ass. Okay. What? my last unknown is WHAT? i wonder how much credit i'd get if i just told him i only based my guess on melting points.... hmm. Naw. Better not chance it. This stupid report is worth 45% of my grade.. but then again it's only a one credit course and I do need to sleep... BAD GIRL. Have to try to do a good job. I just want it to be officially summer for me already. WHAAAAAAA. almost 4 am. got to finish this. i'm such a cry baby. my fault for procrastinating. dumb bitch. when will you ever learn??!?!?! 5:8:03==>Thursday It's now 3:18 am and I'm going to bed soon. I just don't feel like banging out the rest of my report. I just have to do the discussion. Three more hours and I should be done... but that's not including editing. Blah blah. My back is sore already. 5:7:03==>Wednesday Sigh. Took the standardized O.Chem final today. Half way through I was like praying to God to just end my misery already. I wasn't sure what the heck was going on. Couldn't even understand some of the questions. Whatever. After I turned in my test Dr. Cyborg stopped me and we chatted about where I'm going to next semester. Kind of weird talking to him about my future. I just wanted to split already because the final made me sick. Standardize THIS Dr. Cyborg. Everyone is pretty much stressing over the formal lab report for O.Chem. Yuck. So many pages of justifying why you think your unknown is what it is. I should be celebrating right now but I still have this horrible report to do. I wish it was like my COM paper. That class was awesome. I would rather write a paper for my com class then for o.chem anyday. Batula thought I finished today.. I wanted to cry when she asked because I really wish it were. It's okay. By Friday... smooth sailing. I talked to John yesterday and we're pretty much set for summer. Told him to make sure he knows how to swim and he's in fairly good shape before he gets here. He's never been to Hawaii so I hope he has some fun. The good thing is that my brother can take him out instead. Last summer I had to bring my cousins all over because he had football practice. Nice to see family obligation divided a little more evenly. My brother and I spoke about it over lunch today. Summer's lookin' good. My dad spoke to Gina yesterday. Rome said that he tried rapping to her about his day. A filipino rapping? WTF? My bro said it went somthing like this... "Wasup Gina.. what you had for dinah?" Blah blah blah. My dad... I think it's funny but I get mad at the same time because my dad is totally different when it comes to Romeo. He even got to a point where he said "Romeo.. I don't ever want to hear that name in this house." So STUPID. In case you didn't know... my boyfriend's name is Romeo, my dad's name is Romeo, my brother's name is Romeo, and my boyfriend's dad's name is Romeo. Damn Romeos. My mom even accused me of copying her. It's not like it was my dream or something to date someone named Romeo. On occasion... I accidently call my boyfriend "Rome" (that's what I call my brother). Gross. It ain't even like that. "Ain't" What the heck is that? If are+not=aren't, have+not=haven't, ai+not=ain't. What's "Ai?" Silly question. EVERYONE knows what ai is right? Yeah. I don't. So I'm in the computer lab. I've been waiting forever just because this comp lab girl doesn't know how to put things on the network. Shit. The other guy did it so quickly. YEesh. Whatever. Patience is a virtue... and it can kiss my ass. continued... it's already 7:30 pm already and I still haven't started on my report. I'm just not feeling motivated right now. Practically all the students at HPU are done already... poor o.chem lab students. I can honestly say that I figured two of my unknowns out before I even accessed that "magic website." I'm just too lazy to use the rest of my tests to back my shit up. I based my guess on my boiling and melting points. How sick is that? I must have done a super good job to get such an accurate result.. at least I did one thing right. Upside. Batula got another job. 50 hours a week. Good luck to her. She sounded really excited so I'm happy for her. Our plan: become alcoholics this summer. So bad. Kind of lame. We were planning to karaoke my house and try to disguise the liquor somehow so we can drink in front of my parents. C'mon Els and Joy... show me your techniques... Muahaha. I heard about the "fun juice." I wanna rock the speakers and run the disco ball. Yeah. Summer time. So fuckin' close. I just have to finish this fuckin lab report. AAAAAARRRRGGHHHH. All I know is that I'm not going to bed until I'm practically done with this farkin' report. Right. I say that now, but I still have lots to do. I'll update later tonight. Reading past entries... made me realize that I just have to suck it up. It always blows over in the end. Stress? What stress? Just go with the flow and do what you gotta do. Lab report--here I come. After I cook rice... 5:6:03==>Tuesday Spent almost $20 at a darn candy store. Money and kids in a candy store don't mix. It was fun though eating shave ice and just sitting outside the store. Made me feel like a kid again in which my only worry was getting home before sundown... like I don't have an O.Chem final the next day. But it was great having a peep into my future... beach then off to the candy store . The beach wasn't too bad today. The waves were small enough for me to practice. This tourist was video taping me just because I caught a wave and rode it allll the way to shore. Good thing I didn't wipe out like I usually do. I finally beat romeo to shore though. so that made my day. Well. My usual running to the mailbox when the mailwoman comes wasn't too fruitless today. I got some information from WUSTL regarding housing, meal plans, and a physical. I know I should be glad that I have a school to go to, but for some reason I feel so... so.. empty about it. Sorry for the lack of a better word. A year ago, my dream was to get the scholarship to go to WUSTL. But even though I've got that in the bag, I wish it were to go to USC instead. Maybe the reason I want to go to USC is because it's closer to family. That and Karen made USC sound like a super duper school to attend. Sigh. I need to keep myself in check. WUSTL looks like a great school. I scanned the faculty and one of them actually have done research on the types of systems that I would like to work with so that's a plus. A general ChE degree at WUSTL requires classes that seem more interesting to me anyway. If I went to USC I would have to specialize in Environmental. Sigh. But family would be so close if I attended USC........................................... 5:6:03==>Tuesday My boyfriend went down on me today. It felt goood. tInklEbEll2796: hey E36x328i signed on at 9:35:32 PM. E36x328i: what tInklEbEll2796: did you get booted? E36x328i: smallville E36x328i: was good tInklEbEll2796: it looked pretty creepy tInklEbEll2796: want me to come over tomorrow to watch it? E36x328i: lana finally got some balls to tell clark... tInklEbEll2796: i can catch the bus to ewa beach E36x328i: you gotta watch it E36x328i: yeah tInklEbEll2796: okay E36x328i: i thought that she was going to ask him out tInklEbEll2796: i finish around 2, so i'll catch the bus home, then drive to your house E36x328i: she started talking about how she thinks that clark will not like her the way she might turn out tInklEbEll2796: stop. E36x328i: then clark tells her that will never happen tInklEbEll2796: i want to watch it E36x328i: ok tInklEbEll2796: what time are you going to go to bed? tInklEbEll2796: hun do you think $4k is too expensive for a bike? tInklEbEll2796: $3,800 yamaha vstar classic E36x328i: depends what kind E36x328i: you like one vstar tInklEbEll2796: no E36x328i: how the hell do you know about vstars tInklEbEll2796: just wondered if you wanted it. E36x328i: why tInklEbEll2796: it's on sale in our hpu ads E36x328i: where E36x328i: how can i see it tInklEbEll2796: Yamaha V-Star Classic 650 cc 1999 Black. Excellent Condition, Runs GREAT. Comes with one helmet, windshield, passenger seat and back rest, extra passing lights and more... Low Insurance. $ 3800 Call 922-3632 Fredrik "http://www.geocities.com/fcandreasson" tInklEbEll2796: click on the link that i typed as $3,800.... tInklEbEll2796: why it didn't come out? E36x328i: hold on E36x328i: ill be right back tInklEbEll2796: k E36x328i: high mile age tInklEbEll2796: oh E36x328i: too small cc E36x328i: only 650 tInklEbEll2796: oh E36x328i: if i was going to get a cruiser tInklEbEll2796: it just looks like a chopper to me, so i just wanted to see what you would think about it tInklEbEll2796: i only see sport bike or chopper. I don't know! E36x328i: it would probably be 1200cc and up E36x328i: that looks nothing like a chopper tInklEbEll2796: the kine that makes a whole lotta noise? tInklEbEll2796: :-* E36x328i: why dont you check westcoastchoppers.com E36x328i: and see some real bikes tInklEbEll2796: oh E36x328i: bebe E36x328i: how about this for my next shirt tInklEbEll2796: yeah? E36x328i: LAST OF A DYING BREED E36x328i: on the front E36x328i: FUCK POSERS E36x328i: on the back tInklEbEll2796: bebe... tInklEbEll2796: :-$ E36x328i: what E36x328i: why E36x328i: i think that is a mean shirt E36x328i: and only enrichment students can use... tInklEbEll2796: what E36x328i: or gifted and talented... whatever tInklEbEll2796: s enrichment students? tInklEbEll2796: gifted, talented, enrichment E36x328i: the non-poser material E36x328i: since everyone pose now E36x328i: yeah tInklEbEll2796: hun... tInklEbEll2796: can't you at least take a letter in the word Fick, and replace it with some kind of symbol? E36x328i: no tInklEbEll2796: like FU(K tInklEbEll2796: ??? E36x328i: like i said before, and this is how you met me, i am straight forward with everything tInklEbEll2796: Yeah and I love you for it. E36x328i: you know why tInklEbEll2796: It's just, maybe you can tone down the language...? E36x328i: you wanna know why i am like that tInklEbEll2796: why? E36x328i: because i don't give a f*ck what anyone thinks!!! E36x328i: X cept bebe tInklEbEll2796: E36x328i: E36x328i: cool blue tInklEbEll2796: i'm not blue tInklEbEll2796: i'm regidia tInklEbEll2796: My boyfriend went down on me today. It felt goood tInklEbEll2796: i put that on my private site E36x328i: what the hell are you doing on line tInklEbEll2796: don't worry. no one can see it but me E36x328i: are you shopping again E36x328i: you get plenty money today tInklEbEll2796: no tInklEbEll2796: i don't have money to shop E36x328i: i took out 160 tInklEbEll2796: so now you have 20 in your wallet? tInklEbEll2796: i have to talk to you later tInklEbEll2796: or in person, at least E36x328i: you get 140, the other 20 went to aunty E36x328i: why tInklEbEll2796: how come? E36x328i: why not here E36x328i: what you mean talk to you later tInklEbEll2796: because i owe you a huge apology E36x328i: in person tInklEbEll2796: yeah E36x328i: for what E36x328i: what you did tInklEbEll2796: hun... tInklEbEll2796: i'm really sorry for being so tight with money lately and being a bitch about it. tInklEbEll2796: it's just, going to school in wustl will cost about $17k a year and it's not like money grows on trees tInklEbEll2796: it's just hard to remember that you and I are much more important than a few bucks, so i should keep my mouth shut tInklEbEll2796: i have to remember that we're in this together tInklEbEll2796: my money is practically your money and vice versa E36x328i: what ever you say tInklEbEll2796: okay tInklEbEll2796: i'm pau, since it's whatever i say E36x328i: all i know is that i down on money this whole past year and a half E36x328i: what is your problem tInklEbEll2796: i'll be down for life E36x328i: why do you act like that E36x328i: what are you talking about tInklEbEll2796: because it feels like your so loose with money E36x328i: what are you talking about tInklEbEll2796: even if you don't work, you still have a gym membership, blow money on supplements... blah blah blah. tInklEbEll2796: spent choke money on your bike... tInklEbEll2796: ai sus E36x328i: can you tell me a supplement that i have taken in the past 5 1/2 months E36x328i: no you can't E36x328i: i never take anything since november tInklEbEll2796: that huge cannister of protein? E36x328i: so you better get your faqs straight before taking smack E36x328i: the protein was from march last year E36x328i: spoiled E36x328i: and butch say he takes it tInklEbEll2796: oh E36x328i: so no say i spend on supplements tInklEbEll2796: okay your gym membership? E36x328i: i never buy supplements since november and you pissing me off E36x328i: i have free membership E36x328i: because they went screw me over E36x328i: and if they no like get sued, they gave me free membership tInklEbEll2796: so what's that talk about not paying? E36x328i: so, like i said before, get your f*ckin' faqs right cause you pissing me off tInklEbEll2796: sorry hun E36x328i: like i said, they went screw me over and said i never pay when i paid 100 in advance in feb, and they said they never recieve payments tInklEbEll2796: if you need any money, just ask tInklEbEll2796: to take your tests or whatever, i want you to finish E36x328i: so i said ill go court if they want E36x328i: they didn't want to tInklEbEll2796: did you get it in writing? E36x328i: yeah E36x328i: so stop talking shit to me E36x328i: you pissing me off right now with all that bullshit E36x328i: how the fuck you just accuse me of spending all that shit! tInklEbEll2796: bye tInklEbEll2796: what about the damn bike then? tInklEbEll2796: huh? tInklEbEll2796: all that money you sunk into it? E36x328i: what the hell are you talking about E36x328i: i told you butch went waste all my money E36x328i: what the fuck you trying to bring out E36x328i: what fucking money E36x328i: i sold my old bike to build the r6 tInklEbEll2796: whatever already tInklEbEll2796: your money is your money tInklEbEll2796: my money is my money tInklEbEll2796: i take back my apology tInklEbEll2796: our finances our staying seperate E36x328i: up to you tInklEbEll2796: Yeah. tInklEbEll2796: UP TO ME E36x328i: you are a bastard for accusing me of spending, and you should apologize to me for that tInklEbEll2796: It's always up to me tInklEbEll2796: you have no back bone tInklEbEll2796: okay tInklEbEll2796: sorry tInklEbEll2796: i should have kept my mouth shut E36x328i: so stupid E36x328i: answer your phone tInklEbEll2796: nope E36x328i: please bebe E36x328i: look, we need to talk tInklEbEll2796: no E36x328i: answer your phone or that is it tInklEbEll2796: no E36x328i: bebe if you love me then you ll answer your phone tInklEbEll2796: no E36x328i: so you don't love me E36x328i: is that what you are saying tInklEbEll2796: i do love you E36x328i: then answer your phone tInklEbEll2796: no tInklEbEll2796: have you ever had a cold feeling in the pit of your stomache while talking to me? E36x328i: no tInklEbEll2796: like a feeling of dread that maybe it's not meant to be? E36x328i: you E36x328i: no tInklEbEll2796: and you're just lying to yourself? E36x328i: don't tell me i lying to myself E36x328i: you stupid or what E36x328i: why you no like talk to me tInklEbEll2796: what if you're just trying to make it work, when it's just not supposed to E36x328i: you think that you are better than me E36x328i: it is supposed to tInklEbEll2796: no i don't think that E36x328i: so dumb tInklEbEll2796: why do you always accuse me of thinking that i'm better than you? E36x328i: you told me what i am thinking, so therefore you are saying you thinking for me, which translates : you are better than me E36x328i: and i stupid tInklEbEll2796: no i just asked if you felt the same way E36x328i: you said tInklEbEll2796 [10:30 PM]: and you're just lying to yourself? E36x328i: im just lying to myself E36x328i: is that what you think of me E36x328i: so what know E36x328i: excuse me, now tInklEbEll2796: tInklEbEll2796: have you ever had a cold feeling in the pit of your stomache while talking to me? tInklEbEll2796: tInklEbEll2796: like a feeling of dread that maybe it's not meant to be? tInklEbEll2796: tInklEbEll2796: and you're just lying to yourself? tInklEbEll2796: looks like a question to me tInklEbEll2796: would be different if i had said.. "YOU ARE LYING TO YOURSELF" tInklEbEll2796: proff tInklEbEll2796: proof* E36x328i: i said no after the first question, then you said i lying to myself tInklEbEll2796: 8-) tInklEbEll2796: well you have bad timing. tInklEbEll2796: all of those were packed into one E36x328i: no, you have bad timeing E36x328i: i saw how you catch waves E36x328i: rong timing E36x328i: that is ok, at least you try E36x328i: you think you bad now ah tInklEbEll2796: whatever E36x328i: with your proff... oops proof* tInklEbEll2796: why you gotta tease me for? E36x328i: i not E36x328i: i love you bebe tInklEbEll2796: :'( 5:5:03==>Monday To-Do List: 1) O. Chem final 2) O.Chem Lab Report 3) Anthropology course evaluation My Kinetics final was crazy. I only studied about 2 hours but I'm sure I won't fail the class, even if I bombed the final. I'm pretty disappointed with myself. Cruised a bit too much this semester and wasn't able to recover. Oh well. Live and learn. I took Romeo's cousin to take his road test. The tester actually asked him straight up if he came to Kapolei from Kalihi only because everyone said that the road test at Kapolei was easy. Oh Boy. He supposedly had enough points to pass, but the tester didn't pass him because he felt that he needed to work on his left turns. Yikes. Maybe next week. Poor kid. You know how it is at that age... you gotta have your license. If he flunks again next week, Romeo and I will bring him to Waianae. If I can pass the road test there, anyone can pass. After that I had to drop Romeo's cousin and his girlfriend at Farrington. I couldn't bring them back yet because it wasn't recess yet, so we had to kill time. I ran a few errands but I was worried about having two truants in my car. Everytime I saw a cop I had to remind myself to breathe, I was shitting bricks. Two truants, no relation... busted??? Somehow it reminded me of how I felt the semester after graduating high school... all proud and shit and feeling like a grown up just because I could be out in public while public schools were in, too bad no cops would stop me at Pearlridge because I was ready to bust out my HPU COLLEGE ID. Not JCHS id... HPU id. Yeah.. Side note: Chevron gas in Kalihi is cheaper than Kapolei (~$0.04/gallon). Romeo and I are bickering once again... this time over our second cockroach incident. He got mad because I kept teasing him about being a wuss. I just think it's really cute that this huge guy who prides himself on the fact that he can bench xxx lbs. is afraid of an itty bitty cockroach and makes his girlfriend, who is practically half his size, get rid of them. Here's how it went down: after playing monopoly for super long on Friday night I got up to pee... when I walked into the bathroom I saw a cockroach. I squeal and Romeo comes rushing to the bathroom. The cockroach runs out the door and Romeo supposedly tries to step on it as it comes his way (he looked more like he was doing the tootsie roll, but if that's what he thinks is an attempt to step on it, then whatever). The cockroach runs behind the piano. Romeo shoos it towards me and I grab it. I wave it around in my hand to freak Romeo out. He gets mad, so I let him rant and rave. After he shuts up I just laugh, he cracks and starts laughing too. Babe: I know when you're really mad so don't try pulling that shit with me. Eventually I cut it out and go to flush the roach down the toilet, somehow it escapes. I still had to pee so I tell Romeo to look for it. After doing my business upstairs, Romeo still hadn't found the roach. I'm wondering if he even bothered to look. So we exit the bathroom and agree to look for it together. As we start heading towards the bathroom, Romeo grabs me and uses me as a human shield. Huge guy hiding behind his smaller girlfriend ain't gonna fly. Oh well. He was cute trying. I find the roach and yell for help because it started running behind the toilet, when I turn around to check where Romeo is.. he's all the way in the kitchen "helping." Eventually he comes back with a fly swatter. The roach is on the run again and making a break for it. When I reach down to grab the roach Romeo tried to swat it at the same time. I grab the roach, he swats my hand. He was such a great help. That fiasco resulted in a flushed roach and sore hand. Thanks a lot, hun, for all your help. He thinks I'm degrading him for going public about his fear, but I'm not. No one is perfect and everyone is afraid of something. I still love Romeo, even if he's afraid of itty bitty cockroaches. Sigh. This whole entry was done while searching for my unknowns for my Ochem lab. For a one credit course, it's a heck of a lot of time spent on doing homework. My guess for one unknown was right. When I compared it I wanted to jump for joy for actually getting it before using the website. But for the other two... that's a whole new story. Only two more classes to be stressin' about. My goal this summer is to: 1) Go to the beach everyday, except when I have my period. 2) Clean house. 3) Climb the stairs 4) Have fun. Sounds like a plan to me. Hope everyone's finals week is going great. ByeE. 5:3:03==>Saturday Last night Romeo and I played Monopoly for almost four hours. Man. I lost twice in a row. So many times we yacked at each other for "cheating." Last night was fun. I'll miss Romeo when I move. But the bright side is that I'll be able to dedicate more time to studying. Bright side... pshyeah. My Anthropology teacher kept us in class for an extra 1/2 hour. I was so irritated. Chia was the last presenter. She's really nice and we talk a lot, so I felt bad after realizing I was glancing a little too much at the clock during her presentation. Her presentation on the Ganges was interesting though, so that was a plus. To-Do List: 1) Kinetics Test 2) O. Chem final 3) O.Chem Lab Report 4) Linear Algebra Take Home Exam 5) Anthropology course evaluation Slowly my list is getting shorter. I just have to pace myself. I'll go to Starbucks today to finish my Math test and study Kinetics. I've already worked on my take home for almost 4 hours and I'm only half done. The irritating thing about the test is that half the crap on it wasn't even taught to us by our teacher. Just because we're all math geeks is no excuse for testing us on shit that hadn't been explained to us. I usually like learning things on my own but Linear Algebra is just too crazy for me. It's soo theoretical. I'm just not understanding these linear transformations, simplex methods, and theoretical questions. Closed under addition... multiplication... what... subspace, huh? I'm struggling going between real number systems, to matrices, to regular points. Blah blah. I think I'm stressing a little too much about this math course. Ryan told me to just chill. Riiight.. I'll miss that class though. It was my funnest class. On one of our candy days our teacher dropped her Reese stick on the floor, froze, picked up the candy, and ate it in front of the entire class. That was so funny. Five second rule I guess... but in town I think once it touches the floor leave it! She's still alive so that's a good sign. Another interesting tidbit she told us that this french guy, ____, who was very intelligent had not gotten into any college because they couldn't understand his handwriting. He got pretty suicidal after that. Some how he ended up in a dual. The night before the dual he stayed up all night to write out his theories on Linear Algebra. He died the next day at the dual, probably because he had stayed up the night before. It took scholars about 60 years to understand the shit he wrote and it all was able to be proved and was correct. What a smart ass. He's a really important figure in Abstract Algebra. Everytime people see me working on my homework or tests for Math, they ask if I'm in pre-calculus because they see all the matrices I'm working with and assume. Um no. I haven't taken pre-cal since my junior year of high school. I wish Linear algebra is as easy as pre-cal, though. Enough linear algebra. I'm just glad ks taught it instead of dg. He's nice, and he's my 3-2 advisor, but I've had him for diff eq., and calc 2, 3 and he is pretty boring. Speaks too softly I guess. He reminds me of the book, The Glass Bead Game by Herman Hess. Too intellectual to relate to normal people... I want to drink next weekend. They wanted to drink tonight but I'm just not feeling Halo anymore. And I doubt I'll go clubbing with Els them. I need to work on my unknowns lab report. I have no idea what's going on. Chantelle said that someone had bombed this assignment last year and pulled a C so... nah. I need to stop that kind of thinking. Okay. 8:45 am. Off to studying... 5:3:03==>Saturday Planning to sign up for a motorcycle course with my brother. Hope that pans out. I wouldn't mind having a motorcycle license. We'll see how that goes. My guess is that the next open class is far into summer that I won't be able to attend. Oh well. There's always next summer. 5:2:03==>Friday I brought Michael to take his road test today. Unfortunately, they were all booked so him and his girlfriend came all the way to Kapolei for nothing. That's okay. Maybe next time. I just hope we can make it on time to the DMV at 8 am this Monday so he can take his test. I can still remember stressing over my road test... feels like such a long time ago. I already had to renew my license. I'm debating if I should get another license because my license picture is a bit insane. Everytime I have to show it, I swear the other person looks like they're struggling to hold back a laugh. Sucks to be this ugly. Muahaha. I was talking to an old friend the other day and I was informed that JeFer is pregnant. It's pretty cool to have a friend that got married first before getting pregnant. Maybe they can start some kind of trend. I was talking to another friend and we were just doing the run down of where everyone else is. Kind of scary thinking about who I used to kick it with. I'm just glad I didn't turn out like them--drugged out and knocked up. Gross. That would bring too much shame to the family. Kind of makes you wonder how the heck people can get that fookt up. Which reminds me... while running errands in town, I came across a woman who looked ______. She was wearing skimpy clothing, her mid riff was showing, blonde hair, from the backside she looked to be around 20ish. She turned around and faced me and WHAM. She was wearing so much make-up. She looked so nasty. The first thing that popped into my mind was that this lady must be rockin' the pipe. BRB. Mailwoman just came... false alarm. SO ANYWAY. The lady looked like she was probably around 50+ judging by all the wrinkles that the make up couldn't cover. To be lookin' that old, wearing that much make up, and dressin' like a skank... man. I felt kind of bad for her. No more comments already. Bottom line: drugs are bad for you. With that said... I still want to smoke weed. Believe it or not, I have never smoked marijuana in my entire life. But if you count second hand smoking, then I used to smoke marijuana everytime I had classes in D building, which was everyday, because the people that kicked it there were chronic. I guess I just want to lose my marijuana virginity and give it a try. I believe that you should try everything once. Kris said I can smoke with her. Hahaha. We'll see. I'll probably chicken out. I've been a virgin for so long, I figure I can stay one for the rest of my life. Muahaha. Movie prices have gone up yet again. GawdAMN. They must think money grows on trees or something. I haven't gone to see a movie for awhile because I'm still irked that they had raised the prices last year or so. With the price of movie tickets going up, the quality of the movies haven't increased accordingly. So what the fuck are we paying for? What? Just for actors/actresses to have enough to sport them bling blings? I'm still irritated that some of them make more than doctors--you know? People who save LIVES. Geez what is this world coming to? I'm still going to boycott the movies. I refuse to pay that much to watch a shitty movie... except the next movie of Harry Potter of course. But I digress, yet again. My cheap ass is boycotting. I'd rather spend that money on food. Ugh. Hope I still have my contact at the theater to hook it up. Geez. I just need to pump out one more page for this ANTH paper and I can't seem to find the right words. Maybe I can incorporate that old druggie lady into my paper... riiight. Culture, religion, and the environment. STUPID course. What a waste of time. Whatever. Just have to take the courses I need to graduate. So best suck it up. Okay that's the mailwoman for real. XXX USC please. 5:1:03==>Thursday Romeo and I went body boarding again. I was actually riding waves more often than getting pounded by them. That was a good feeling. I even caught one right in front of Romeo and I banged him. He was teasing me because of my big smile while I was riding the wave. Well der... I wasn't gasping for air so that's always a reason to smile. He was also teasing me because I wore a one piece suit instead of a usual bikini. He told me I looked like an old hag. Whatever. I paid good money for that swimsuit so I intend to get my money's worth! Even if I look like an old lady... Money don't grow on tree, dammit. Afterwards, we fought a little bit...okay maybe a lot... because I told him I was going to cook him dinner. I didn't cook. I don't have the patience for it. So I went home all pissy because he was making me feel bad about not wanting to cook. Raly was telling me that I'm really lucky that Romeo cooks. What she forgot was that I don't even eat the stuff he cooks. It's only seafood and grass for this girl. Sigh. Everyone tells me that his cooking is pretty good. Oh well. I know that I'm lucky Romeo is my boyfriend. Too bad I can't say the same for him. I'm just like my Manang Gina. No cooking. Her bu does all the cooking. What's it going to take for Romeo to know that I'm not a domestic? Cooking and Regidia don't mix. I'm the one that tried to bake a chiffon cake but it came out as dense as bibinka. How the heck did I do that? I have no idea... I do know I hate wasting food, so I refrain from cooking. Maybe I should start eating real food again. I'm noticing spots in my nails so I'm wondering if it's due to some nutritional deficiency. Great. One more thing to worry about. I'm getting so irritated with myself. Why can't I eat regular meat? I'm such an idiot. My diet no longer makes any sense to me. But right when I was about to eat a piece of steak, for some reason I stopped myself. I just don't get it. Maybe I just do it out of habit. Or maybe I'm just retarded. Probably the latter. I have no problem with eating raw fish and whatever from the ocean but when it comes to land animals. NO. But the stupid thing is that I have no problem eating food containing gelatin, e.g. CHOCOLATE COVERED GUMMI BEARS (MMM YUMMY). We all know where gelatin originates from... What the heck is wrong with me? You are what you eat... so that makes me a bony fishy girl? Whatever. Lame attempt to laugh at myself. Sigh. I got the talk today from my boss regarding commitment. Whoops. I think I'll quit by the end of May. Just in time before my relatives arrive and to give me more time to relax before I move to wherever. I told her I'd try to hold until July but nah. I just don't give a fuck about that job. I'll work when I want to work. I'm not rich, but money isn't the only thing on my mind. I guess it all started from last semester... working and studying too much makes you go nuts if you know what I mean. Even though I was getting a good income, it just wasn't worth the cut in my social life. People are asking me where I'll be transferring to. It sucks to tell them I'm going to WUSTL when deep down I have my heart set on USC. My fingers are still crossed so I'm hoping for the best. It's getting sickening waiting for the mailwoman to come and bookin' it down the stairs to retrieve the mail hoping to find a USC envelope in there. But nope. Nothing. Everytime I'm home when the mail comes.. same old shit. Holding my breath, and hoping a USC envelope is waiting for me. Still have to wait. This waiting... SUCKS. What else. What else. Romeo's not answering his damn phone. I need to apologize and see if he wants to go to Maui. Batula asked if we wanted to go. We talked about Romeo and I sharing a room with Jen and Jay but then she teased me about Romeo's snoring. So shame. No one wants to sleep near Romeo anymore because that boy can snore. I still love him. I grew immune to his insanely loud snoring a long long time ago, anyhow. That thing about B was true. I can't believe that guy did that. The sick thing was that he had a key. Fuckin' bastard. I hope he rots in hell for doing something like that. It's kinda B's fault for even being out there at that hour but still. Freaks like that need to go rot in hell. To-Do List: 1) Analysis of a dissertation 3-4 pages 2) Kinetics Test 3) O. Chem final 4) O.Chem Lab Report 5) Linear Algebra Take Home Exam Slowly.. slowly.. this list will be empty. 4:30:03=>Wednesday I was on my way to school bitchy as hell because it was just too early to be up at that hour when it suddenly hit: this is the last time I have to wake up this early for school. That thought just brightened up my day. I know it s kind of lame but when school is just kicking your ass, you ll look for any reason to smile. Yesterday Romeo and I went body boarding. It was usually 2-4 ft with occasional 5 s. I swear I almost died. I really suck at body boarding. When I did get the wave, I would either totally get wiped out or was not able to stop myself so I would get pushed far towards shore. Shit. The paddle back was a bitch. I was going nuts already. I began talking aloud questioning myself:  Why the fuck do people do this to themselves. Maybe I just have to get better so I d spend more time enjoying the ride instead of getting wiped out CONSTANTLY. I m just really glad I didn t get pounded into the reef so that s always a plus. I crossed another thing off my list. I worked for about three hours on my Thermodynamics test and I still didn t finish it. After going at one problem for about 45 minutes, you kind of know that you ll never get it. I just turned in my test. Even though there were only 5 questions the test still took that long. I don t feel too bad because I was talking to my classmates that had taken the test before me and they took about the same time. So maybe I m not as retarded as I think. Pshyeah. I wish. Romeo and I were arguing over our finances the other night. It was so hilarious. Every month it s almost the same old shit. This month it went: Regidia:  My credit card bill came in. You owe me XXX. Romeo:  What the fuck! I never charge that much. Regidia: Whips out the bill  This is your charge, your charge, your charge&  Romeo:  No way, I never even put gas that day. Regidia:  I don t use Shell gas and I don t even use this credit card anyway. Romeo:  Liar. Regidia: Whips out receipts from Chevron on days close to the days Romeo didn t put gas&  Look I filled up on these days, my car doesn t take that much gas. Romeo:  Fine. Add it. Regidia:  Okay your total bill comes out to XXX. It includes what you owe me from the past month. Romeo:  Whoa. What the fuck is this $50 for? Regidia:  The day I lent you the $50 bill to pay for the tickets. Romeo:  Fuck that, pay your own. Regidia:  Fine. I ll credit you this much Romeo:  No way credit me some more. Blah blah blah. He eventually forked over XXX and he now owes me $XX& Moral of the story: Don t charge what you can t pay for when the bill comes in& ROMEO. Especially when you have a curiput girlfriend. Romeo thinks I m always trying to jip him. What a dumbass. He needs to just believe in me. Alright. No school tomorrow. I hope I can finish whatevers so I can relax this weekend. To-Do List: 1) Service paper on the Halawa Valley Project 2-3 pages 2) In class reaction paper for Anthropology 3) Analysis of a dissertation 3-4 pages 4) Kinetics Test 5) O. Chem final 6) O.Chem Lab Report 7) Linear Algebra Take Home Exam 4:28:03==>Monday I'm getting really good at this class ditching thing. I have cut more times this semester than I ever had throughout high school and college, up to this semester. I overslept that's why. By the time I awoke, my O.Chem class was starting. School is a 40 min. drive from my ghetto so there wasn't no way I was going to make it in time. I just went to my last two classes instead--can't miss Linear Algebra. That's the best and funniest class I have. That's the only upper division course that I have actually been able to score over a 100% on the tests. It's nice to feel smart once in a while. I wrote out what I had to do before I could kick off my summer. The list wasn't so bad. Things usually aren't as bad when you put things into perspective anyway. So here's what's left of this rotten semester: 1) O. Chem quiz on Chapter 24 2) Thermodynamics Test--Second Law 3) Service paper on the Halawa Valley Project 2-3 pages 4) In class reaction paper for Anthropology 5) Analysis of a dissertation 3-4 pages 6) Kinetics Test 7) O. Chem final--this is the best part of my week 8) O.Chem Lab Report 9) Linear Algebra Take Home Exam I think if I just copy Karen and not procrastinate than I should finish it all in time. Dang. That girl has got things covered. If you're reading this: Good Job! I've decided that since I did my laundry instead of going to two of my classes today then I can go hit the beach tomorrow. With the way my luck is, it'll be flat or just too windy. I just bachi'd myself. Okay wave gods here: Regidia is not going to the beach tomorrow Alright it's 8 pm I've jabbered enough. I'm hoping the Chinese Cultural Plaza parking attendants left already so I don't have to shell out the cash. I'm going to go. Bye. P.S. I bit Jenie and now have a chatterbox, it's on the page somewhere. Feel free to leave any quacky comments P.P.S I'm the real Mrs. Jolie. Get it straight Homie! 4:27:03==>Sunday Happy Anniversary to us. We are now one month short of making seven years. The best thing about it is that I'm still stoked to spend the rest of my life with him. I am grateful for being blessed with such a great man--the yin to my yang. I love you Tigerman. Corny. Next subject. Romeo finally plucked my armpit hairs good. I taught him a few techniques. I love watching him pluck those bad boys. He looks like he's concentrating super hard. Batula kind of scolded me for turning my boyfriend into a fag but I see nothing wrong with him grooming me. He doesn't even mind, it's not like I have to beg him to pluck it. I just have to grab the tweezers and tape and he knows what to do. Good obedience training on my part. The other day Romeo looked like he was about to cry because he was bummed about only being able to lift 275 lbs. at the gym. Boohoo. Get over it muscle head. The hotel party was off the hook. The regulars were there. I'm not surprised. Everyone else had to study for finals and what not. As always, Romeo cleared the joint with his loud ass snoring. We had to sleep in the dining room because Romeo liked the AC on full blast. I tried to go and sleep in one of the rooms where it was warmer but Romeo just bundled me up, gathered me in his arms, and told me to suck it up. My teeth were chattering. I warmed up eventually and fell asleep. Didn't wake up until we had to shower... Kris showered after us and the three of cleared up the fridge. I kind of regret not doing jack this weekend... kind of not. But now I'm super tired and I still have this 5 page paper due tomorrow. I think I'll push my Thermo test to Wednesday. Last night I was the worst Trumps loser in the world. No matter how hard I tried and no matter how good my hand was, me and whomever my partner was could not beat Romeo and Jen. FUCK. I kept swearing up a storm and I was going nuts. Losing and Liquor do not mix. It's so frustrating to constantly lose at that ridiculous game and Romeo teasing the shit out of me did not help at all. On the last game we played... Romeo and Jen just had to make two more packs and that would have been like the gajillionth time I lost that night... Melissa threw down a card... Jen put down the low joker and then Romeo started going nuts, I put down my shitty ass non-trump card then... overjoyed from the feeling of winning yet again Romeo happily throws down on the table his Guarantee joker and starts telling us all that him and Jen won AGAIN. Out of habit I yelled "POUNCE." After a few seconds Kris and I realized that we actually WON. Romeo had just gone over his partner... cancelling out Jen's joker and there was no way in hell they would have been able to make another pack after that fuck up. Muahahahahahahahahaha. It felt gooood. Even if I know Romeo still had other trumps to throw... the bottom line is that he threw his Guarantee down onto the table and I pounced that shit, he just wasted the Guarantee trump card and fucked up him and Jen. Sigh. Cheap win but it was still a win. Muahaha. Romeo wouldn't shut up after that. That was actually the highlight of the night for me. After constantly saying "You just gotta believe" after losing yet again, my partner and I finally pulled off a win. CHee hoo. The rest was typical... suckin' up the booze and playing Halo. Kris was mixing last night putting to use that shaker she got. She's pretty good at it. Now we have two bartenders. So when one gets messed up the other one can cover up for her... hopefully. The penthouse view was awesome. Hope we get to do that again minus the Halo. On a side note. I finally got Romeo's gift that I ordered from the Discovery store. Thank God Batula had flown up to Las Vegas during spring break so I could save on shipping. Her and my sister are awesome for helping me out. Yeah. The boys are coming down this summer which means that no heavy duty tour guiding for me this summer. Rome can do that. I took the girls out last summer so now it's his turn. It'll be fun to have my guy cousins here this time. Maybe I'll take them up the stairway to heaven. I found out that the girls aren't coming because they're bickering... no comment... except that: talking shit about your cousin's man is fooked up the hook. What else is on my mind... Romeo was scolding me for always blogging. I don't care who reads this. This is a place for ME to vent and blabber. It's interesting to look at past entries and read what the heck I was doing and feeling at that particular point in my life. Nes got her acceptance letter from USC this past Monday. I told Hank and he was going nuts. We're like stressing out over it now. Why the heck haven't we gotten any word yet? Must be USC doesn't want us. Sigh. I just want to graduate. I wonder if Frankie got his... Spent $15 on rice last night. What the heck? Oh well. You can't eat your money is what my family always says--which helps to explain why my wallet's so thin and my ass so huge. The seven of us also went to Shogun to damage their buffet today. At the end, we got the bill and asked that it be separated. The lady came back and on all our bills the tip was calculated on the bottom of the receipt to show how much our total bill was. FUCK that. No one is going to tell me what to tip. It was a freakin' buffet for christsake. So I filled out the receipt myself and tipped accordingly. I'm usually a good tipper so it just irked me to be told how much I have to tip. Since when was tipping mandatory? I know how much the waiters and waitress' depend on tips, my dad's a part-time waiter so I know to be generous. Do they think I'm an idiot or something and would have forgotten to leave a tip? Geez. Okay. You just gotta have faith that other's won't forget such things. Next subject. Got a rejection letter from one of the scholarships I applied to. Don't know what sucks more: not being notified that you didn't get it and just assume that since they didn't send you any congratulatory letters that you just didn't get it OR receiving a letter telling you that you're just not good enough? Both suck. I'll get over it. Man. I can blog about so much shit in hopes of procrastinating as much as possible to push off this paper. Ah. Whatever. I better go then. 4:25:03==>Friday Romeo plucked my armpit hairs on Wednesday and I'm beginning to see sprouts again. Man. I have hair in my armpits again. Romeo probably didn't do a good job. I need to train him a little bit more on the art of arm pit hair plucking. Why do women have to groom their underarms while men get to let those bad boys run wild? It's like women have a lot of time on their hands or something. When I was doing the service project at Halawa this girl started fixing her hair and when she raised up her arms I saw huge vanas growing out of her pits! Holy shit. I never did see that much hair under someone's arms. It was like she was smuggling black cats under those skinny white arms. God DAMN. Although it shocked me, for some reason I thought it was beautiful. I figure armpit hair is natural... she's staying natural and allowing her body to let whatever grow. Yeah I know that was kinda weird. I'm suddenly inspired to grow out my cats.... yo mama. Romeo's going to have to pluck them tonight. Natural this. If I lived in Europe then my views would be different, but I've been raised in a culture where ya gotta tame those pits... shave, pluck... just get rid of 'em. My armpit hairs grow at different rates. My right pit hairs grow faster then the left. Why couldn't God balance me out a little bit more... it could be worse though so I better be grateful for the minor problems that I do have. Gosh.. so much caffeine. I'm now a Starbucks WHORE. I have to get an extra shot of espresso to feel anything now. Man. Punch a hole in my wallet why don't they? Anway...my brother brought me home 2 bean burritos, a 7-layer burrito, 2 of those apple pie things, and jalapenos. I can't believe I was only able to eat one bean burrito and I became full. WTF happened to my appetite? I can usually down three of those. I stepped on a scale the other day and it said I was at 130 pounds. I swear that scale is broken. I thought I was 135 lbs. Better eat up now, because when I'm on my own... no more shrimp and scallops for me. So anyhow. I walked into my brother's room to go look at myself in his mirror when I noticed his gown hanging over his closet. Dang. Little Romy Boy is going to be graduating this year. I can still remember playing hide and seek with him and the other 'hoodrats... whenever Rome got tagged I would have to take his place as the "out" person or he would go home and cry to our mommy. Now... he's... graduating. Kinda scary kinda not. There was this one time when we boxed, I kicked his ass. I was like 9 and he was around 6... after he started crying my sister tells me to run upstairs... too late I didn't run in time... my mom gave me dirty lickin's just for kicking the momma's boy's ass. And the time he got his period... Oh how the times have changed... now after almost ten years of all sorts of different martial arts I dare not fight with my brother. The last time my sister and I teamed up to grapple with him, he kicked both of our butts. That's my brother for you. I still have a bitch mouth but that can't be helped. The niggah's graduating soon. We're getting old. Okay that's it for now. Have a great weekend everybody~~~ 4:24:03==>Thursday Romeo tried the backside attack but that didn't work too good. I don't know how gay guys do it. Sometimes it feels good. Sometimes it hurts like hell upon penetration. Yikes. Maybe I'm just weird. So anyhow. I didn't call J & M regarding Saturday. I guess I'm just getting sick and tired of laying out the invite but seldom getting invited to anything myself. How sick is that? Like I'm not good enough to get invited to a social activity. Whatever. I told them awhile ago. They probably wouldn't come anyway. They can be so snobby sometimes... I guess I'm still irked that they had screened Els' calls on Slam's birthday bash at Venus. Whatever. I don't care. As long as I'm getting slammed... then it's ALL good. All nighter tonight. O.Chem... here I come. 4:23:03==>Wednesday Looks like both WUSTL and USC will accept Statics from UH. Guess I know what I'll be doing for the first month of my summer. Great. Physics all over again. I just hope I can get the approval code to take the class... Note to self: go to Jamba Juice before lab--free smoothie. Hawaiian Monarch--Saturday. > Just thought I share this with you guys that aren't > here. It's pretty funny! But I'll have to admit I > don't think I'm smart, tomorrow we still eat steamed > rice, I love fish, especially raw, red is not my > favorite color, I'm not afraid of colored people and > I > don't think I'm superior to other asians. =) > > > YOU CHINEE IF... > > 1. You thing you smartest peepoe in wald. > > 2. You haf pager an cell phoe wi you all time. > > 3. When you an 2 other guy talk, peepoe thing > you > > fai-ting. > > 4. Today, steam rye. tomorrow, fry rye. > > 5. Noddle you din-nah. > > 6. You don lye eat FISH. > > 7. Most member in you fam-ly wear denture at > young > > ade. > > 8. You mose favrite collah RED. > > 9. You fraid black peepoe. > > 10. You thing you superia to all Asian. > > > > YOU JAPANEE IF... > > 1. You obsed wi you haih, you cah, an you > crothes. > > > > 2. You wan marry Korea American o Chinee > American > > womah(males); > > or you wan marry white gai(females). > > 3. You extreme porite an act innocent. > > 4. You feet rook funny in way you walk. > > 5. You fraid brack peepoe. > > 6. You thing you superia to arr Asian. > > > > > > YOU KOREA IF... > > 1. You smoe an drin too much. > > 2. You die instanly if you stop dring Soju an > eat > > kimchi. > > 3. You spen moe tie in bar than at home. > > 4. You eitha drie Hyundai o Mercedee. > > 5. You play piano. > > 6. You actual sorry that Mah-gret Cho sitcom > > cancel. > > 7. You fraid black peepoe. > > 8. You only condut businee wi locah Korea > businee. > > > > 9. You speak Korea in 99.9% of time on sociah > > occasion. > > 10. You have least one relative who owe a liquo > sto > > e. > > 11. You thing you superia to all Asian. > > > > YU AR PILIFINO IP... > > 1. Yu wan tu bi a dansir, a singir, or an > aktore, > > ibin dough yu hab > > dayjob as a nars, a sikyo guard, a > > dis wasir, a witir/witris or an accountant. > > 2. Yu kip tilling ebriwan dat a mimbir ob yur > > pamili back home is a > > politisyan or a mobi-estar. > > 3. Yu brot lots ob dried pises when coming back > > prom bikisyon in > > Pilipinas. > > 4. Yu like wearing GOLD on your iir, nick, hans > an > > pinggers. > > 5. At leas one mimbir ob yur pamili is a nars. > > 6. Yur sister or daughter marries a US > > Servicemean, hay naku! > > 7. Der ar 20 pipol sharing roms in yur home. > > 8. Yu hab at leas 2 PULL-TIME jobs. > > 9. Yu ar nat aprid of egots; in pact, yu wis yu > > wir blak. > > 10. Yu don`t care ip yu ar superyor to all ader > > Asians. 4:22:03==>Tuesday It's 2:06 am, ladies and gentlemen, and Regidia has just finished her draft for her Anthropology class. It came out to a whopping 13 pages, but that can easily be adjusted with the tweak of a few margins and a different font... Next up on this hell week agenda: proof the paper, finish three chapters of Thermodynamics and Kinetics, finish my take home Linear Algebra exam (which I've already sunk in 3 hours and expect to sink in 2 more--damn theoretical questions), study for the Organic Chemistry test on Friday, finish the Organic Chemistry extra credit homework, turn in my data in exchange for the NMR so I can figure out what the heck my unknowns are and.... dadadaDA get ready to partAY this SaturdAY. I just hope I can stick to this rigorous schedule... that I always seem to find time to blog... and get away with just 4 hours of sleep a night. I can sleep after I pass out drunk on Saturday. It's already 2:12 a.m. I'll go play with my bitch and my haole. They always relax me. Hope everyone else is having fun. 4:21:03==>Monday Friday: Cut O.Chem to hit the beach with Romeo. His mom grounded us so we stayed home to play video games. Some religious thing about being careful on Good Friday or something. Whatever. So I had to borrow Romeo s clothes since I just walked into his house with just my bikini. Maybe seeing me in a bikini freaked out his mom so she made us stay home. Afterwards he brought me to school so I could go to three of my classes today. HPU is so retarded. They cut down the shuttle service to have it run once every hour as opposed to every fifteen minutes just because it was Good Friday. Uh hello. There are still students that have to go to school all day. If you re going to cut school services that much, than just call it a holiday so us students won t have to bother. After I winged a presentation in Anthropology, which I think I did pretty good, Romeo picked me up around 8 pmish with Michael and his girlfriend so we could go to a bbq at Uncle Al s house. It was fun. After the second time of kicking it with James parents, and not drinking anything& somehow Auntie got James to bust out the Tequila and I had to show them all how to do Tequila shooters. Wow. One shot and my head was ready to hit the pillows. Pretty sad. We finished the rest of the bottle though. James was set on getting drunk I guess. That was fun. I like hanging out with Romeo s family. Michael asked me to take him to get his driver s license this Tuesday. Maybe next next week or so because I have to make up for all the procrastinating I ve done. We re planning to go hit up the Pali during summer. Maybe. I want to go shoot sinners with Rocco when he can come back out with us. I can t believe Auntie Veron busted his ass so bad just because we brought little Rocco home a tad late. L&L that s why& The bottom line is that Romeo's cousins and family are so fun to hang with. Kind of ghetto though after hearing some of the stories we were talking about on Friday... but still they're fun. Saturday: Did my thang at the Halawa Valley project. Remember those H3 protesters? Yeah. They were a part of it. Got to take the tour, pull some vines, and began to feel a little bummed about the H3 over all those heiau s and stuff. Kind of weird seeing H3 from the bottomside. Got home around 1:30 pmish, got in a little R&R by playing with my dogs then showered my muddy self. That night I stayed home to catch up on some work. I realized why I don t always like to stay home on the weekends when my dad is home& while I was doing Thermodynamics work my dad just comes into my room and tells me  I don t want to hear your music [I was listening to Krater 96.3 in my room slow jams& old school music& ya know?] The next thing I know, I hear loud ass disco music. I try to just concentrate on my work but after all that bass and what not was fucking with the lights in my room and making it flicker, I walked into the living room and there my dad was, busting his groove and running that DAMN disco light. So I figure. If you can t beat  em, join  em. So I started imitating my dad s moves and gettin my groove on to the old school disco. That disco ball isn t so bad after all. Dancing with my dad was kind of fun. So after I settled down, I just went back to work. Sunday: Work on Easter Sunday? Sucked. Good news: made it home just in time to catch Charmed the bestest show in the world. There s my weekend in a nutshell. Just another page in my boring life. 4:17:03==>Thursday Note: White chocolate covered gummy bears SUCK. Chocolate covered gummy bears are only $1.75 for four oz. at the Ewa Candy stores. Woohoo. So anyhow. We spent half the class period trying to calculate the amount of jellybeans are in the stupid jar at HPU's bookstore. After we got the range, we divided the intervals and each student in the class will be turning in their assigned number to the bookstore. If any one of us wins, we share the prize with the class. That was very educational. NOT. That's a good way to spend a Kinetics class. My teacher also came to the conclusion that jelly beans have no temperature, based on the van der waals equation (of a gas). MMMmmmkay... I guess all chemistry teachers are weird like that. Romeo's sad because I elbowed him while he was sleeping just so I could concentrate on something. It's just that he snores sooo loud. It's so distracting. I'll make it up to him before we go hit the beach today. On an awesome note. I just learned that my petition had been approved to take O.Chem credit/no credit. Oh yeah. No more stressing over that class for this girl. Uh Uh No way. Anyway. I looked through my e-mails and one said "Flight deals from Kapolei" Uhh.. Kapolei doesn't have a commercial airport. Sigh. Spam sucks. I've been eating so much beans. Now I'm struggling so hard not to blow too much gas in public. I never learn. I thought I could use myself as a test subject to prove that beans doesn't give me gas. Uh. My ass is proving me wrong. So I had to go get a study room so I can fart in peace. If I do die from the smell, at least no one else will be affected... until they open the study room to retrieve my body. Muahaha. Alright. Gotta go work on my lab. Figuring out these unknowns are kind of fun. We'll see... hopefully I can figure out what my unknown compounds are based on the various tests I have performed. BYEE. Have a nice day. And remember: only three more weeks of school. 4:16:03==>Wednesday Something died in my room. I can smell it. It has to be behind my dresser or something. Gross. Not sleeping there tonight so hopefully when I do attack the source tomorrow, the stench won't be as bad. I feel like a dog sniffing like crazy trying to pinpoint the exact location. Maybe I should bring in my dog to help. Nah. They're good for nothing. All show no go. I'm trying to bid on a ddr game and pad on ebay. I keep getting outbid. I can't wait to play again at Joy's house. That was a lot of fun. It looks like a good way to work out so that's the main reason I want it--that and so when I play at fun factory I can show all them little brats what's up. Geez. I ate like half a pound of gummy bears on my way to school. They are soooo good. I think that the amount of money that I have been spending on chocolate covered gummy bears lately is enough to keep that candy store in Kapolei in business. Geez. I've been charging all my purchases. I can't wait to see the credit card statement--good chunk of my purchases at the candy store. How old am I again? Not 21 I'll tell you that much! Note to self: NEVER buy chocolate covered gummy bears at Pricebusters. They are no where as good as the real kind... the kind that's only the white bears coated in good chocolate. Muahaha. Learned that lesson on Monday. That's what I get for being a cheapskate. 4:15:03==>Tuesday There's still crap under my fingernails from all the propogation I helped with today. The thing is, the ginger roots I was handling today are grown hydroponically in the living machine... the roots had this "mud" all over them. Two and two together: that "mud" was probably the sludge aka SHIT that came out the pig's or cow's ass. That's what I get for getting all up in tank five's business. Whatever. Chad made we waste solids by myself today. Didn't really know what I was doing. But I got the job done. While I was taking samples I almost fell into the vat. God I wish I was taller so I didn't always have to stand on the bucket to collect samples. Collecting samples in those conical vials weren't working too good for me. My short arms weren't always able to lift the vial high enough so the sample would slosh over the edge. YUCK. It's called "wasting solids" for a reason. Maybe I should rethink this "getting all up in the business." An office job ain't looking too shabby right now. That and they were killing the pigs today. It was soooo stink outside. Geez. The shit in the machine actually smelled better to me. While I was getting water from the seventh tank to water plants, some water splashed onto my lips. Didn't lick my kissers for awhile. HELL no. Even after I wiped and washed my lips. Yuck. The good thing is that by the time the water is in the seventh tank it's like r2 water so not so bad. Getting straight sludge on my lips from wasting solids... now that's a whole nother entry. GROSS. HOLY SHIT. I just remembered that I didn't reroute the piping after I wasted solids. Oh no. I hope Chad and Chris noticed before they left for the day. If there is a shit flood out in Hono'uli'uli by the slaughter house--IT WASN'T ME!!! Muahhahahaha. Sigh. Time is passing. Am I? 4:15:03==>Tuesday I feel so uncomfortable around her. It always feels like she doesn't want to be around me and that we are just being polite to keep up appearances. I bought a lot of chocolate covered gummy bears to school yesterday and she tried one and just commented on how shitty they were. I agree with her. Those gummy bears were not as top quality compared to what I'm used to; it just irritated me how easy it is for her to say negative things. "Ugh" And a loud "Ugh" is what she said. She can be so rude sometimes. Come to think of it, she has made rude comments about my food in the past and making bad comments about food are just plain RUDE in my book. At least I share. I can't think of a time she ever shared her food with me at school or something. I guess I'm just jaded from all the stories my boy has told me about her. Kinda funny kinda scary how some people are actually like that. The "...licking all her chicken mcnuggets so no one else would eat them..." is just plain greedy and rude. She was young, but still.... okay. Enough negative comments. But "to each his/her own" ya know? 4:14:03==>Monday Communications with USC is sooo disappointing. All I wanted to know if Applied Mechanics 1 & 2 would transfer over to USC. Turns out, USC doesn't even review that kind of stuff for prospective students. All I wanted was a YES or NO. Geez. Maybe I'll just take Statics this summer and hope for the best. It's just driving all the way to Manoa for an hour long class doesn't exactly sound like my idea of fun. Wouldn't hurt to take it though. Yeah. If anyone wants to carpool with me to UH during the first summer term let me know. 4:13:03==>Sunday Worked sucked. The piles of homework that need to be done sucks. Having not finished my application packet sucks even more. Romeo sucked my ear Dinner sucked because it didn't have enough bagoong. This headache from going to bed at 430 this morning sucked. Having to work even though I had a headache sucked. Romeo sucks for keeping me at his house so late. Romeo doesn't suck anymore since he taped Charmed for me. The blister on my foot sucks--it's itchy. Only half my essay is done on the benefits of being a union member, so that sucks. Writer's block sucks. The fact that this day is almost over--gooood. 4:12:03==>Saturday I got my financial aid package from WUSTL and the bill doesn't seem as bad as I thought it would be. It is much less then the expected $30,000 bill. The scholarship they gave me really helped out--a lot. I need to commit to WUSTL by May 1. I'm trying to hold out until I hear from USC but I can't hold out forever. After speaking to Karen a while back, I thought USC was definitely for me. She made USC sound way better than WUSTL. It's a gamble, though. Should I just wait for USC to let me know and pray I get the scholarship, or just commit to WUSTL knowing that I've got the scholarship in the bag? My parents aren't rich and I don't want to just throw away an awesome scholarship being offered to me. I am very grateful to have been awarded such a prestigious award from WUSTL. It definitely tips the scales that way. "Most transfer applicants will be informed of our admission decisions sometime in May" says USC's website. SOMETIME IN MAY? Do they expect us transfer students to just wait that long on the edge of our seats? I need to know now. SIGH. big SIGH. I feel so homeless. Not knowing which school I'm going to... Watching everyone else register for next semester and I don't even know where I'll be... Midwest? West Coast? WESSIDE! I'm such a retard. Muahaha. On another note. I dyed my hair jet black. I dyed my hair during spring break to cover up my too light brown tips but they're starting to show. Sooo I decided to go all negro. (In case you're wondering negro=black so the box top says. I'm wondering what language they translated that in. The directions are in English and Spanish so I'm guessing negro is Spanish for black? Darn. I took Japanese in high school) ANYWAY back to my lame story... Unfortunately, I also dyed my skin and I can't the negro out of me. And I have to go to a party tonight. God must be having a great laugh. So my mom is rubbing me down with some alcohol. I'm smelling oh soooo good right now. I don't know. I feel so sterilized, maybe I don't have to shower for the party tonight I tried to get Romeo to go hit up the beach with me to soak this crap off my neck but he said NO. Sooo... alcohol here I come! Before we started using the alcohol my mom kept suggesting lame ass shit to help me get it off. It got to a point where I was wondering if she was trying to help me or just wanted to see how desperate I am to get it off my body. AAAGGGH. Some mother I've got. Okay better go work this negro off my ass. 4:11:03==>Friday Today is a "Be a Bum" holiday so I decided to celebrate by not going to any classes today. The window of opportunity to get my ass off this chair is 15 minutes and closing. After that, it would be too late to go to class. Yay. I'm staying home. I still need to do my Union scholarship essay and study study study. I'm so over this studying thing already. My teachers... they can study THIS. I started doing my ethnography essay and realized that I can probably pump out a piece of shit paper in 4 hours. I only have to type 15 pages. And another essay on a dissertation. That shouldn't be too bad. My Com paper only has to be 5 pages so that should be a breeze. Why can't all my classes be like that Com class? Math--two take home tests and homework. I'll survive that one. That only leaves my Chemistry courses. O.Chem. If I just ace the last two tests I can probably pull an A-. The chances of getting good grades on the last two tests are slim to none so I'll settle for a B. Thermodynamics. What do I have to say? I'm taking that credit/no credit and I got an A on my first exam. C grade here I come. Lab. Only one credit so it can kiss my ass. The month is clear for partying. April 26--penthouse! Who needs to study for finals that weekend? I do. I'll regret it when I see my report card so it better be worth it. Less than one more month of school. Please God let it go by quickly and stop the pain. I just want to have fun and school is getting in the way. I'm getting sick and tired of spending Saturday afternoons at Starbucks trying to understand what's going on in my classes. In fact, I'm getting sick and tired of spending time at Starbucks--period! I'd rather be at the beach getting as dark as possible. I'm getting sick and tired of trying to be white and using Likas everynight. For Christ sake... I like DOVE. Okay then. That's enough ranting and raving for now. So petty. I know. Byee. 4:10:03==>Thursday Last night I was rubbing my dad's scalp medication into his scalp when out of the blue he asks me if I got accepted to USC. I said NO. I'm going to Missouri instead. He starts giving me a guilt trip on how hard it will be for them to visit me and my sister at the same time. Sorry dad if the location of Missouri is incovenient for YOU. He asked about the USC envelope I received the other day and I told him it was just some financial info that I needed to send in--no biggie. So for no reason at all my mom just asked me if Romeo is going with me. And then BOOM. My dad just goes all ballistic on me and launches another lecture about boys. Not wanting to hear it, I just put away his medicine and abruptly tell him not to worry. I'm not going to get pregnant before I get married, unlike some other peopleS in my family... ***That comment was aimed more at my mom then my dad.*** So anyway. He follows me to my room and we get our fight on. He even threatened Romeo last night. He was like... if you ever marry him I will cut his throat. I don't care if I go to jail... ***He's pscycho like that*** Eventually, I bring up the time he and my mom came home and Gina and Rome were in his room. Rome didn't even get scoldings. Just the other night my dad told her that she could call him dad. Riiight. She better not or I'll tell my manang on Rome. That point is immediately followed with the "You treat me differently because I'm a girl!" excuse. Bottom line: His boy can have girlfriends but his daughters can only have books. "I'm not stupid dad. It's possible to have a vagina and have a functioning brain as well. You support Rome in having girlfriends. I know you guys give him condoms and you tell him your stories when you were young. That's not fair if you let him do that but not us." [Heavy filipino accent] "Yeah I know dat. I lub my girls more dan da boy. Once he grajuates high school he is on his own. But with the girls, daddy still supports you." "He gets away with more at his age than me and manang ever did!" Blah blah. My dad agreed with me that he does treat us differently based on our private parts but he tried to play it off that although he is more strict on the girls its because he cares more about us. B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T!!! Sigh. He just goes and showers because he knows I'm right: Rome's leash is more loose. Anyway. Something was wrong with my car today. So I had to go make a pit stop at my dad's working place. He hooked me up with some fluids and I was well on my way. Before I left he reminded me how much he loves me and that he will be more harder on my brother when he graduates. Riiight. The way I see it, as long as Rome still has a boto he will get almost anything he wants from my dad. Enough said. Now I have to work on my recommendation letter. Can you believe I have to write it myself, send it in to my ex-manager and then she'll proof it? That's like licking your own ass. Who likes to write mega good stuff about their self? I'm just going to copy an old recommendation letter that my old high school teacher wrote me. It's funny how he didn't mention all the times I got kicked out of class for disruption in the rec letter. I remember sitting in the front and swearing at my highest pitch since he couldn't hear high pitches. Everyone would crack up. And when he had a neck brace... someone ratted me out and told him that my homework was bullshit so he actually took a good look at what I actually did turn in and read it out to the class.... "Mr. ____ looks like a chipmunk. I hate this class." etc. etc. Yeah. Got a big phat F for that assignment. The homework was supposed to be on Physics! That was freshmen year though. My rebel year. Or at least rebel enough for this good girl Jeez I digress. One last thing. Thanks Anna for that sweet comment. But none of my stories will ever be as nuts as your fire and the sleeve tidbit Alright. Gotta go kiss my ass. Byeeeee 4:9:03==>Wednesday There was a cockroach in Romeo's room and all he did was hand me a napkin to pick it up. What the heck? He said that since I saw it first I had to get rid of it. What a wimp. So I tried to pick it up with the napkin but couldn't get a good grip on the little bug so Romeo holds up a plastic bag. Thinking he is going to get the roach, I step to the side to get out of his way. Instead, he hands me that plastic bag. I'm just laughing so hard because I can't believe he's not going to get the roach. He's going to make his girlfriend get it instead. So I use the platic bag to grab the roach and Romeo immediately stays clear of me. I chase him around with the roach in my hand and he's just running like a punk. After I flushed it down the toilet I laugh at him some more so he tackles me down. That was funny. Too many things happened yesterday. -630 met up with Joy at the beach. -Ran over a stupid pigeon because it didn't get out of the way in time. When I looked at the front of the car there were feathers all over. I remember when I was dropping Els home and I ran over a cat. Yuck. -Made a pit stop at Romeo's house to shower. Only his mom, auntie, and Butch was home. Weird just popping in to shower. I told his mom and Butch about the cockroach incident, they couldn't stop laughing. -Didn't volunteer yesterday. Chad was a no show. -Got a free Jamba coupon because they made me wait too long. The Peanut Butter Moo'd was actually really good. -Did Linear Algebra homework at Starbucks. -Went to Romeo's house to wait for him to come home and fell asleep in his bed. -Romeo and I went to Pearlridge yesterday to shop for his nephew's presents. Couldn't decide what to get him so we got him two seperate things. I like shopping for baby clothes with Romeo. He actually puts more thought into it then picking clothes out for me! -Saw my brother at the mall. He was with his friends. He's not sure if he wants to work at Dairy Queen since he was the only guy applying. -Ate a late lunch with Romeo at Monterey Bay Canners. Food sucked and was not worth the $60+ tab. Note to self: never get the stuffed shrimp again. My dad cooks better shrimp. -Romeo took off the nail polish on my toes. Pedicure got jacked anyway from bodyboarding in the morning. -Tweaked our chase master game to include hide and seek. Won 2-1 because of my awesome stealth mode. Romeo almost gave me a heart attack when he lunged at me while I was hiding. He was looking the other way when all of a sudden he just sprinted to my hiding spot. I thought he couldn't see me. I almost fell on the curb when I was trying to run away. I still won that round since I was able to book into base in time. After that game. We raced about 4 times. Short sprints from light pole to light pole. He beat me each time. Yeah I'm a turtle. It was a great way to work off the food we ate at the restaurant. All in all, yesterday was awesome. I got in some homework but had loads of fun as well. I'm in love. My day is going good. I got a B on my O.Chem test. Pretty awesome for only studying one day. Congratulations to Els. He's taking a huge leap towards adulthood. We'll miss you Jade. Okay enough for now. I need to go study the second law of thermodynamics. LaterZ. 4:7:03==>Monday Yeah. A second entry. I'm addicted to this journal. Can't wait to print it out at the end of the year and stick it in the old school kind of journal. So yeah. My day started off really crappy. Had to wake up at 5 am to cram for O.Chem. The rest of the day dragged. Even Math class didn't cheer me up. The best thing about Mondays is that I top the long day with a three hour class--Intercultural Communication. That class rocks--even more than Linear Algebra. For IC, Jarren took us on a tour of downtown. We just walked down Mauna Kea, took a break at Aloha Tower, and returned to HPU via Fort Street Mall. The Aloha Tower part rocked. Once we got there she let us go on a break for an hour. So I went walking around with this little group of girls and for some reason we all split because we wanted to shop for our own things. That's fine. Had to make a trip to the candy store anyway. I didn't buy anything at the candy store because Melissa called me and so I just wandered around aimlessly with the phone glued to my ear--completely lost and looking for anyone in my class. I turned the corner and met up with these other classmates and they got me to come along with them to Gordon Biersch. I was kind of worried I would get carded since I'm not even 21. They told me not to worry and so we just got a table, ordered, and talked. They were teasing me about not being of age yet when suddenly, the waiter just shows up with four cups of beer and describes the different qualities of each. I'm like, "Please God don't tell him to card me!" After the waiter's done with his little speech he just leaves us and we all sample beer. Pretty cool! I liked the darkest beer. Can't remember which one that was but it went good with the artichoke hearts. I got to drink beer in a public place and wasn't even carded. Three of us didn't even have to pay for the pupus since my classmate picked up the tab and told us not to worry about it. What a sweet lady. We all left a hefty tip for the waiter though because it felt odd not paying something for the food, especially since I don't know her too well. The conversation was really nice and picking at pupus while sipping beer was kind of interesting to me. More so since the conversation was with a much older crowd (everyone was older than 30). When we met back up with our class we told them the story and they all seemed sort of bummed that they hadn't gone to GB, especially since they handed us free beer, and we didn't pay for anything. My teacher laughed when they told her that I'm not even 21. That was cool. Topping this crappy day with a beer drinking feast at Gordon Biersch made this day not so crappy at all.... except now I have to wait for another half an hour before I can get my car out of Chinese Cultural Plaza without having to pay for parking. I knew I should have parked on the street or Kukui. Yeesh. I'll go finish my homework--use my time wisely. Shyah. I hope everyone else's day was not so crappy especially now since we're in crunch month where everything is due. BYEE 4:7:03==>Monday Goofing off this whole semester and now I must pay. Today I had my O.Chem test and I didn't do so hot. Boohoo. I'm over that. I'm pretty irritated with myself for playing video games with Romeo two nights in a row when I should have been studying. What a freakin' retard. I should have been studying yesterday, too, but I went to Pearlridge instead to blow off some dollars. As soon as I walk into Macys, Phoebe spots me and the first thing that pops into my mind is, "FUCK. Caught. Supposed to be on the mainland." He just looked at me with confusion. Whoops. I told him I was moving to Las Vegas with my boyfriend so he'd stop calling me. What to do what to do.. Uh Duh. Tell him straight up to stop calling me. Hope that works. If not--caller i.d. Looking ahead at what's do within the next month seems so overwhelming. Note to self: take things one thing at a time. Yeah right. I'm looking forward to doing dawn patrol tomorrow. I don't care if it did rain kind of hard this past weekend. I need to go to the beach to put things into perspective. I'm going nuts. So anyhow. Last night I was reading the newspaper in the living room and suddenly my mom cuts the lights and my dad turns on the disco ball. What? Disco ball. Yup, I kid you not! My retarded dad bought a stupid disco ball for our living room. When my brother came home he asked me if I saw it (we actually talked to each other) and we both teamed up on my dad like old times. What was my dad thinking? Now when he sings karaoke... not only will he use all four speakers... but he will sport his disco ball as well. What the fuck will the neighbors think? I can't wait to move already. I would be too worried to come back because my dad was fantasizing about hanging a disco glitter ball in place of the chandelier on the far side of the living room. Dear Lord. Help my dad come to his senses! One more scholarship that I need to apply for. Jeez. I'm so out of it already. Whatever... "Suck it up" I guess. I just scanned this entry and I wonder if it ever makes any sense to others. Makes sense to me and it is MY journal. Muahahahahaha. Wasting more time when I should be doing homework. Wait one more story. I got home the other day and saw a USC envelope on my bed--the big kind of envelope. Immediately my heart started to pound and I hesitated to open it. I immediately calmed myself down and reminded myself to breathe deeply. I sat down on the bed with the envelope in my lap. Holding my breath and praying that the envelope contained an acceptance letter, I rip the envelope open and scan the contents of the letter... ...[to be continued]... ~Byee 4:4:03==>Friday I ate some saimin yesterday that wasn't really cooked so my tummy wasn't feeling too good yesterday. I won't be eating saimin for awhile. All last night I couldn't get the shrimp basket from Popeyes out of mind. So Romeo brought it to me today after he finished school. What a sweetie. As soon as I arrived in downtown for the rest of my classes he was waiting at the shuttle stop for me with my food. He drank all my soda but that's okay since I don't really drink a lot of soda anyway. I feel bad because he had to drive through traffic afterwards. But the shrimp was gooood and the fries "broke da mouth." Popeyes has the best soggy fries in the world. I don't even care if they use chicken stock in their batter. I'm getting over this not eating land animal stuff. I think as long as I can't see any immediate relation to where the heck the food and its ingredients came from then I'm A-Okay. Ignorance truly is bliss. I'm kind of irritated with myself for pigging out again. I'm trying to lose weight so my clothes aren't as tight anymore. I'm trying to boost up my metabolism but I can't seem to find the time to exercise. I can't diet. Food is too good to pass up. On another note--Marielex and I are alive. Yesterday we couldn't go all the way to the first plateau because when I got to the vertical part I saw a cop giving someone a ticket by the entrance of the H3 tunnels going west. So we waited for him to go away but the idiotic cop turns around before entering the H3 tunnels and pulls someone off the road for speeding... right in front of the stairs. Marielex and I were pretty far up and were totally exposed to the world--no trees to shield us from the cop. So we just stopped where we were and prayed that he wouldn't look up. After waiting a few minutes (it felt like an hour) we decided to creep down the stairs until there was a tree that could hide us. We found what felt to be the smallest tree in the world, stopped right there, and prayed that the small tree could cover both of our large asses. We waited a few more minutes cowering behind the tree hoping that the cop would just leave already. As soon as the cop left we booked it all the way down. Our hearts were pounding because we were scared the cop would meet us with trespassing tickets at the bottom of the stairs--not because we were tired. We could have made it all the way if we weren't scared of the cop busting us both. P.S. We're going again on Thursday. And... in this entry there may have been a little exaggeration... just a little. Our asses aren't that big 4:3:03==>Thursday Marielex and I will be climbing the Stairway to Heaven today. Hope we can make it to the first plateau in good time! If we don't show up to school tomorrow please notify the police and let them know where to search for our bodies. Knock on wood! 4:2:03==>Wednesday I was walking to my car to grab my shades and for some reason I just hopped into the drivers seat and drove to school today. What a dork. I was supposed to catch the bus. Believe it or not, but I would rather catch the bus on Wednesdays because I hate battling traffic on my way home. Oh well. Maybe I ll stay in school just a little while longer to wait out the traffic. What a way to reduce pollution for the day and save money. Next week I ll catch the bus (if it s not raining). Yesterday Chad was giving a tour of the living machine to this one military guy. When I arrived Chad introduced me as his intern. The guy just looked me up and down and commented that I may not be dressed appropriately. Immediately the word DICKHEAD just popped into my head. This was the first time the guy has seen the machine. I ve been at the site doing my part for how many weeks already you d think I would know what I could wear to do the job? Yeah. I was wearing a skirt. Big whoop. Am I supposed to wear pants all the time just because guys usually work there? When I become an engineer I will proudly wear skirts to work, whenever possible, just to revel in the fact that I am a woman in a male dominated field. Sometimes guys think they re smarter than girls in math and science. Kiss my ass. Women are just as competent as men in everything! So what if I like to do girly stuff? I can be tomboyish as well. For all you women out there, don t you just love it when guys have that look of disbelief on their face after being outdone by a woman? When I used to play soccer I ll always remember this one game that the vars girls played against the boys vars. Although we lost, a lot of the guys were surprised that we could be just as rugged as them. Not all girls are reluctant to slide tackle we ve got the scars to prove it. And yeah& some women will play in the mud, even if our hair and nails get all yucky. I m glad my boyfriend is supportive of me and does not try to hold me back& sometimes. He still thinks I should only wear skirts when I m with him. As if! Bottom line: Women are just as competent as men. Okay. I better go. Take care ya ll! 3:31:03==>Monday I drove by the stairs this morning and I want to climb it again. I'm debating if I should just climb it by myself next week but I doubt Romeo would let me. It was cute watching Romeo try to haul his ass up the stairs, but at the same time I was getting irritated because he was taking so darn long. I know we're not in the best of shape but we could have at least made it to the first plateau. I think I'll try to convince him to come with me or I'll go by myself next week. I need the exercise. My washing machine is shrinking my clothes. I have given up pizza and ice cream for the rest of the semester to help me lose weight. I don't want to buy new clothes just because my clothes shrank. Why did my washing machine have to do that to my clothes? I do not want to ruin my record of not buying clothes for myself--two months and counting. It's nice to see my credit card statement and see that most of my charges are for gas and food. Waste not want not--riiiight. Okay byee. 3:30:03==>Sunday Jeez. It's been raining so much it's beginning to feel like I live in Wahiawa or something. Ugh. I hope it stops raining or I'm going to have to drive to school tomorrow instead of hitching a ride from Uncle Frank or something. Save money save gas. Which reminds me... this whole environmentally friendly crap sucks! I've recycled all the crap in my little recycling center that I keep in my room. I think I'm no longer going to maintain one. I'm getting sick and tired of storing away garbage in my room--plastics, white paper, and colored paper. I stopped doing the glass thing because that was too much of a bitch. Kris was teasing me about that when we were reminiscing about freshmen year. So anyway. Why should I go out of my way to recycle when a good chunk of people on this rock just dumps their recyclable goods in the trash? Oh boy here comes the conscience: You can't just copy what everyone else is doing. Doing something good for the environment, no matter how small, is the right thing to do. Blah blah blah. Yeah. Whatevers. The bottom line is that I've given up on recycling. I'll only recycle aluminum to get some money. Recycling paper and plastics pays shit--unless you count the good feeling you get like you did your part for the day, but that's beside the point. Not having my little recycling center in my room feels a little odd since it has been a part of my room for about four years. Too bad sooo sad. No more sorting paper and platics for this girl. Right when I thought I was over this recycling thing I stored some of the paper I was about to trash into my binder. I'll go dump those in the recycling bins at school. Jeez. Right when I thought I'd never recycle again. So addicting. Spread the word--Recycling is the besteseseseset in the world for the world! CHeeWHo. I wonder if I should just throw away all the papers I would normally recycle into the bins at school so I don't have to drive to the bins to deposit the goods. Easier for me since those bins are almost in every classroom. I wonder what people would think of me if I brought my shredder to school so I could shred the confidential papers that I would like to recycle. I'll never see those people again so it wouldn't matter if they thought I was nuts. I figure... bringing boiled eggs, kamatis, and bagoong for lunch is way worse than bringing a paper shredder so I wouldn't be teased too much if I bring the shredder. Or better yet... I can just put all the shredded papers in a plastic bag and ditch it at school. Recycling will always be a part of me. I'd feel too weird dumping recyclable paper in the trash or not using both sides. Decision made--dump papers at school. I knew HPU would be good for something! Okay... Good night. And remember the four R's: Recycle, Reuse, Refuse, and Regidia. 3:29:03==>Saturday Fell asleep at Romeo's house. His mom thought I slept over the entire night. He said she cooked things for breakfast that I could eat. Whoops. Maybe next time. We heard that the new addition has arrived and xxx asked me what I would think of xxx if xxx drowned her. "Evil..." I replied. The individual responsible for the whole mess is an asshole to even do something like that in the first place. Some people just never grow up and learn to take on responsibilities. They commit acts with no thought of how the consequences would affect the ones they love. My cousin and I practically stayed up all night talking and a good part of the talk was about one particular situation. She didn't even think I was telling the truth. Don't you just hate it when reality is so surreal that you wish that it were not true but life just slaps you hard across the face just to remind you how harsh it could be? Sigh. 3:28:03==>Friday Not once this week have I been able to sleep in. Grr. Oh well. Seize the day, I guess.... Blah. I'll sleep in when I go back to school. Hope Joy's ex thing goes as planned. Note to all you players out there: don't mess with Joy because she will find out. Muahaha. Frat party ain't gonna happen tonight. Too lazy. Summer time.... New excuse for not wanting to hang... "summer time" since spring break has passed. Geez. Bought another damn pair of slippers today. Too many colorful slippers. My pedicure is alreay jacked. It didn't even last a week. Damn fins. I guess I'm just one of those girls that can't keep still long enough to maintain her manicure or pedicure. Ooh. Movies on. Byee. 3:27:03==>Thursday It s already Friday but it still feels like Thursday since I haven t slept yet. Anyhow... we didn t see anything freaky deaky the other night. It was pretty lame. We kept driving around Hawaii s Plantation Village hoping to see something but nothing happened. The lights were odd but no ladies on the side of the road. The highlight of the night was when Rocco began shooting  sinners in downtown. I swear, Romeo and his cousins can be so weird sometimes. Too bad we already dropped off Kris at her apartment so she missed the excitement. Maybe next time... Tonight I had dinner with Adam, Elson, Isel, and Joy at Zippys. I was getting worried that my food would fly out of my mouth because of Joy s cherry. Man. They give a whole new meaning to talking to dirty. You may think you know, but unless you have not had a conversation with them you don t know jack! Muahaha. We also went to Club Lulu afterwards. That was cool. Getting our freak on. They sing a mean Bohemian Rhapsody! Dang Joy. You go girl... her and her electric slide... whoo! Crap! Romeo checked out that dorky spider game to see my high score but others totally knocked me off. Oh well. I m over that. I WAS on the scoreboard. I swear. No more on-line games for me anymore. Have to budget my time more wisely. No more will I kick it at the student lounge to talk story. My ass will be in the library until the start of O. Chem. Muahaha. Sounds like a plan--we ll see. I haven t even started writing my ethnography yet. Whatever. Blah blah blah. Spring Break is almost over. Sigh. Time passes by so quickly yet so slowly at times. Time is passing, are you? Ha. I love that poster. Romeo and I didn t spend time together today. He only came by to give me money and pick up the title for his VW. It s okay. We ve been spending a whole lotta time together anyhow. I love him but it s not like we have to see each other all the time. Tomorrow we ll do something. Something physical. Chase masters maybe? I need to exercise more. My energy level is going to hell and I m getting grouchy. My mom and I are bickering again. I blew up because she didn t want to sign the financial profile for WUSTL. It does take two to tango--I admit. I should give myself an attitude check more often. I can be such a bitch sometimes. I blow up more often than I should and say things that I shouldn t. Just because I think someone does not deserve my respect does not mean I should show them disrespect.  Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. ... so why the fuck are they still assholes when you re trying to be so nice??? AAAAAAHH! Trying to take the high road can be such a bitch sometimes. I can t wait to just leave already. I m at a point in which I don t even care which school I attend. As long as I m out of this house... ugh. Peace out. 3:26:03==>Wednesday Too much dramas... so only Romeo and I went to the Stairway to Heaven today. We only went halfway but had to turn back around because someone had a hard time breathing. Guess he better start conditioning so he can make it all the way up next time we attempt to climb the stairs. I may eat a lot of junk food but I can still haul my heavy ass up those stairs. He thinks that just because he can bench 300 pounds that he's good enough to get up those stairs... but after climbing for half an hour and all my shit talking... he insisted that lifting weights and conditioning is different so that's why we couldn't go all the way today. OUCH. He's reading this as I'm typing and keeps wacking my arm. What a BITCH. Did you read that bebe.... Muahahahahahahha. Here's his side of the story: This is what really happened... after carrying 45lbs. of cargo (both my- 8 big bottles of water- and regidia's extra shiznit) in my backpack and leading the way for all of the indviduals on the mountain. I decided to stop, let everyone pass us, take a few pictures and head back down. i really wanted to get to the top today,but that would be selfish because it was only two of us, and i wanted more people to come with us. next time i going stay in the back and follow. actually i didn't want to miss the lunch wagon at kewalo's because the food is good. Back to me.. Sooooooo... we went to the lunchwagon at Kewalo's to pick up some food and had a little picnic at Ala Moana. We did a little swimming afterwards. Beach again. Geez. Dang. Everyday this week. Chee hoo... chee hoo chee hoo hoo hoo! Whatever Romeo said is true. So the drama... Girls can be so catty sometimes. That's all I really have to say about that. Sigh. Romeo says that after we got back to his house we fell asleep and I was drooling on his arm and snoring loud while he drooled in my hair. Sexy... Yeesh. Otay. Better get ready. Going out with his cousins. Spring break. I'm so proud of myself... I haven't been productive at all! 3:24:03==>Monday I had to go through the jury selection process today and it SUCKED. The students that did end up on the jury were not even excused when they informed the judge that they had tests next week. Although I am glad that I did not actually get selected to serve on the jury, towards the end of the process I was wishing that I had gotten selected earlier in the process so I could have left earlier--instead of having to wait until the final jury was selected for the trial and all grievances were accounted for. SHIT. What a great day to spend a beautiful sunny spring break--in the courtroom. Too bad my first experience of getting summoned was marred by my incessant need for a mental vacation. If I had gotten my summons for summer, maybe I would have enjoyed the process more like Mr. Lucas had told me last night when I was waiting in line at Foodland. That was a little weird seeing him at the store. He commented about the food Romeo and I were purchasing--all junk food. We figured that since we had played some tennis and gone body boarding afterward, we could afford to veg. Ha. It was gooood. We watched The Ring last night too. I m ashamed to admit it but I was a little scared at the end. The image of that girl just creeped me out. When Romeo had to go to the restroom I made him leave the door open while I waited in the hallway. I m such a wimp, huh? That movie was good. I haven t gotten freaked out like that in a while. Luckily, I was still able to drive home by myself regardless of that recurring mental image of Samara. When I got home... GRR. Did I mention I m beginning to hate--scratch that--despise my little brother? More on that later--that issue deserves its own entry. I gotsta gotta go... and salvage the rest of my day. P.S. I knocked off another thing off my "To Do Before I Die" list--get on the scoreboard of an online game. It's official: I have no life ferryhalim.com/orisinal/... yay. After two tries I got my ass to the top of the scoreboard of the spider game. Woohoo. It's a lame game but the point is my name is at the top. Nough said! 3:22:03==>Saturday I saw a guy and a girl riding a motorcycle the other day. I noticed that he was wearing the helmet and all she had on were shades. I'm glad my boyfriend is nice enough to force me to use his helmet... guess he cares enough to keep me safe. 3:21:03==>Friday Romeo and I fought again last night. Second time this week. We're on a roll. He was being a spaz because I wasn't answering my house phone or cell. I was talking to Hank. We were just talking about transferring and our upcoming Linear Algebra test. I guess I was just so engrossed in the conversation. He thinks there is something going on but nothing is going on... really. Romeo became infuriated when I asked if he wanted to play tennis and hit the beach this Sunday with Hank and his buddies. I think he just needs to trust me more. I'm sure that if Hank was a girl there would be no problem. I see nothing wrong with making new friends that are majoring in the same field as I am. I don't know if he realized this yet, but engineering is predominantly composed of males. Of course I'll be making friends with a lot of males. He just needs to trust me. Romeo kept trying to get into my head and tell me that all guys, except for him, are only nice to women to "get in there." Is my boyfriend nuts or what? Such a retard. Again... TRUST. I need some more trust. It's not like I haven't had the opportunity to cheat. But the point is I never did. Shit. What's it going to take to get some T-R-U-S-T? What made things worse was that I told him that I might share housing with other males if Neslyn is okay with it too. I doubt it if her boyfriend will let that happen either. But it's a possibility. TRUST. Can I just get a little more? Sigh. I love him but if the trust isn't there we're not going to last. Especially since I'll be leaving the rock soon. Sigh... On another note. I woke up at 7 a.m. because my neighbor kept yelling "CHEE HU... CHEE HU... CHEE HUHUHU!" What the heck is going on? Then I hear "Tino!" and some crying. Then someone just speeds off. Man. So scary living in the Kahala of the Wesside--can anyone say G-Hetto? This incident was better than the last time they got on my nerves for smoking some ganja and blasting their radio... the night before I had two finals back to back. The bright side is that there were no gun shots so I'm all good. Okay. Later Alligator. 3:20:03==>Thursday I finally did it! Yup. Passed all the tests and was able to donate blood. I think I tried about 4 times before they finally let me give it up after being rejected for my piercing, foreign country visit, iron level (2x). The process was not as bad as I expected. The questions about who I had sex with, what I had sex with, if I was doing drugs were crazy. Kind of scary thinking that there are people in this world that actually do some of those crazy things. Yikes. Getting stabbed& not too painful. They teased me because my donation was so quick. I was pumping my fist as much as I could to hurry it up. For some reason I started to laugh during the process and they looked at me like I was nuts. I just couldn t believe I was actually doing it that s why! There was some mean psychological warfare going off in my head trying to make myself keep still and stop shaking to donate. Well that s over. I grabbed sooo many snacks though. Hungry as usual and I figured I better eat a lot since I just donated a pint of blood. Well USC informed me that they would not accept the Statics credits from UH. Looks like my summer is free. Woohoo! I just hope my cousins do come this summer. Last summer I couldn t have as much fun because I was taking History 1 and 2 while they were here. Too little sleep and too much alcohol. Uckit. I got A s. God must have been in a really good mood. I need to catch up on this Lent thing. I thought two hours a week was not a lot but now I wish I only sacrificed just an hour a weak. My current Lent tab is: 5 hours. Dang. That s a whole lotta cleaning. Oh well. Man. 5 freakin hours this weekend. Grrr. Some kick off to Spring Break. Two tests tomorrow back to back. Math test and Anthropology. After that& . SPRING BREAK!!!! I think I ll start my break by staying home on Friday night and doing as much homework as I can so I can enjoy the rest of the week much more. Hopefully I can clear my Lent tab before I go out that night. Well studying and cleaning at the beginning of my break sounds like a plan to me. Okay. I m out. 3:19:03==>Wednesday My brother locked his keys in his car and called Romeo to jimmy his door. It feels a little odd when my brother goes to Romeo for help. It kind of feels like my babe is like a big brother that my little brother never had. Strange... On another note: War is not the answer!!! Screw George Bush and Saddam Hussein. 3:18:03==>Tuesday Actually woke my butt up early enough to meet up with Joy and her dad at the beach. Got to actually touch a surfboard. Whoa! I had fun. Hope to do it again because the ocean really does help relieve stress. Thanks Joy! Well I got my acceptance letter from WUSTL. If I had gotten the same letter last year, I d be ecstatic. Although I am grateful that I had been accepted, I can t seem to shake this feeling that I wish the acceptance letter was from USC and that I would be receiving a scholarship to attend. Sigh. Wishful thinking... Romeo and I patched things up. Hormones I guess. Can you say,  PMS ? Great to be a female because you can always use that excuse for being a total BITCH... sometimes. So anyways, we were making out in his old room. I was lying on the bed and he was kneeling on the floor. Pitch black. His auntie walks and he just jumps on me and yeah. SOOO shame. But SOOO much funnier. He was all irritated but my uncontrollable giggling quickly overwhelmed him and so we shared a lengthy laugh. Hahaha. It really is great being in love with your best friend 3:14:03==>Friday I asked for another extension for my Thermodynamics test. Monday is the last day. No more asking for extensions. I swear. If I keep asking I ll just keep slacking. I just did not feel like studying after I learned that HPU just totally screwed me over. HPU had not sent in a transcript to a scholarship committee. I put in my request around February 7. The deadline was March 1. Why the heck did they not send it in??? Because-- they probably LOST my request. How professional is that? They kept asking me if I was sure I sent it in like I am an idiot or something& OF COUSE I REQUESTED THE FREAKING TRANSCRIPT. I may not have my receipt to show for it but I do have the check that I wrote out that day for TWO transcripts. They kept telling me that only one transcript was requested that day. Whatever. I would not pay a jacked up price. A $10 check was not cut out for one transcript. Did they think the other $5 was just a donation to this wonderful school? What made me even angrier was when I called in yesterday checking to see which transcripts had been sent so I could try to pinpoint what went wrong; to help determine if it was my fault or theirs? The lady would not even disclose that information over the phone! I already told her my student ID number how much more privacy do ya need?  We re sorry, we can t disclose the information over the phone. I said,  But I already gave you my student ID number! She said,  But I can t be sure that you are who you say you are. I said,  I m only asking for information on transcripts sent out this semester. She said,  I can t tell you but I can confirm what was sent. She made me play a guessing game&  Was ____ sent? Was ____ sent? What was sent around this time& . Ladididadida. What the fuck? I know I asked for that transcript because I wrote all the requests at one time so I knew what had to be done. I was organized. Too bad I can t say the same for HPU. Now the whole process is taking longer because they re trying to determine who screwed up. I don t give a FUCK anymore. So I went into the registrar s office today, wrote out another request, and made sure they would explain to the scholarship committee why my transcript was not sent in on time. I don t even care who screwed up anymore. Just admit it and send in my damn transcript.  Fix the problem, not the blame. RRR. I'm so over this school. What I learned: 1) Write checks or pay with a credit card easier to trace. 2) Get a copy of the transcript request so you have a hard copy of the original request if something goes wrong (side note: even LCC gives transcript request copies& damn HPU!!!) 3) Breathe in& breathe out& everything is going to be all right especially since it s Friday J 3:14:03==>Friday I asked for another extension for my Thermodynamics test. Monday is the last day. No more asking for extensions. I swear. If I keep asking I ll just keep slacking. I just did not feel like studying after I learned that HPU just totally screwed me over. HPU had not sent in a transcript to a scholarship committee. I put in my request around February 7. The deadline was March 1. Why the heck did they not send it in??? Because-- they probably LOST my request. How professional is that? They kept asking me if I was sure I sent it in like I am an idiot or something& OF COUSE I REQUESTED THE FREAKING TRANSCRIPT. I may not have my receipt to show for it but I do have the check that I wrote out that day for TWO transcripts. They kept telling me that only one transcript was requested that day. Whatever. I would not pay a jacked up price. A $10 check was not cut out for one transcript. Did they think the other $5 was just a donation to this wonderful school? What made me even angrier was when I called in yesterday checking to see which transcripts had been sent so I could try to pinpoint what went wrong; to help determine if it was my fault or theirs? The lady would not even disclose that information over the phone! I already told her my student ID number how much more privacy do ya need?  We re sorry, we can t disclose the information over the phone. I said,  But I already gave you my student ID number! She said,  But I can t be sure that you are who you say you are. I said,  I m only asking for information on transcripts sent out this semester. She said,  I can t tell you but I can confirm what was sent. She made me play a guessing game&  Was ____ sent? Was ____ sent? What was sent around this time& . Ladididadida. What the fuck? I know I asked for that transcript because I wrote all the requests at one time so I knew what had to be done. I was organized. Too bad I can t say the same for HPU. Now the whole process is taking longer because they re trying to determine who screwed up. I don t give a FUCK anymore. So I went into the registrar s office today, wrote out another request, and made sure they would explain to the scholarship committee why my transcript was not sent in on time. I don t even care who screwed up anymore. Just admit it and send in my damn transcript.  Fix the problem, not the blame. RRR. I'm so over this school. What I learned: 1) Write checks or pay with a credit card easier to trace. 2) Get a copy of the transcript request so you have a hard copy of the original request if something goes wrong (side note: even LCC gives transcript request copies& damn HPU!!!) 3) Breathe in& breathe out& everything is going to be all right especially since it s Friday J 3:13:03==>Thursday I met with my advisor and put in a petition to take O.Chem credit/no credit. If my petition passes I have to promise myself I'll go to class at least twice a week. I'm getting lazy enough as it is. My Thermodynamics test was supposed to be today but I just could not force myself to study so I spoke with Dr. Bozlee and got it pushed to tomorrow. Yay. In a way that's kind of bad because I just have another execuse to laze around. So unmotivated. What's happening to me? I care but I don't care. I'm so over this semester already. I just want my cousins to come here so we can paint the town GREEN. Yeesh. Mid term... halfway outta here. Well I'm in the HPU library right now charging my phone. I'll leave as soon as it's recharged. In the mean time I better get all over the First Law of Thermodynamics... Need to get a C. Maybe taking my hardest class credit/no credit was not a good idea because now my standards have significantly lowered. "When the going get tough, the tough get going." Too bad for me the tough isn't going soooo my lazy ass is staying right here. Muahaha. 3:12:03==>Wednesday Romeo picked me up today. We had brunch at Brian's Grindz in Kalihi. It was pretty good. Better then L&L I'll tell you that much! They have more vegetarian options so that's a plus in my book. He's walking this semester but he'll be taking more classes this fall. It's like something in him has changed and he's actually into expanding his mind. He's making me explain Calculus to him. He saw me working on my Linear Algebra test and asked me to explain that to him too. These lessons benefit the both of us. I refresh myself by teaching it and he's getting free tutoring lessons. It's also a turn on to see him concentrating. So anyhow. He's bent on taking a Logic class this fall. He can have my Discrete Math book any day. He'll probably do better than I did in that class since common sense is essential--something I am in dire need of. Haha. I didn't feel like going to school today but he forced me to. Told me he didn't want to date no free loader. Bump that. Missing another day of school won't hurt! I swear I'm losing my drive to succeed. It feels like I'm just heading down this road of laziness. I have my Thermodynamics test this Thursday but I seem to be lacking that desire for an "A". A "C" is good enough for me right now. It's like I'm in a rut. Ha. Listen to me. What a whining wench. Best just suck it up and get the best grade possible because I know I'll regret it later. Muahaha. Self therapy. Cheap and it works! On another note. I bought Romeo's anniversary present from DiscoveryStore.com. Kinda funny how the order number ended in a "2796"--our anniversary date for our anniversary present. We must be doing something right. I got it shipped to my sister's house. She better remember to drop it off at Melissa's hotel room so she can bring it back. Shipping directly to Hawaii is outrageous. Thank God soo many people go to Vegas so I can just use my sister's address. Well...I finally spent enough at the 2by2.net mall to get a freakin' $10 cashback. FUCK. I spent close to $500 on-line. I better stop on-line shopping already! For the rest of the year. I swear! Pshyah. 3:11:03==>Tuesday I thought I was sleep walking but I asked Romeo s cousin if I was talking to him and he confirmed it--I wasn t sleep walking. Greeat. So the drama last night was true. Bottom line: Don t cheat. I guess his guilty conscience got to him that he spilled his own beans... all over moving an AC vent. Yeesh. If you re too old to play the game then settle down! Or better yet... don't play the stupid game at all. So anyhow. Chad and I wasted solids today. Some of the sludge splashed onto my face and my first thought: What the heck am I getting myself into? I guess I have to concentrate on the big picture: doing my part for the environment. Yeesh. I even tried to not me girly about it so I just flicked it off my face. After a few seconds my girly side took over and so I excused myself and rinsed the shit off. Yick. The bright side: It was animal waste. I'd rather have animal waste on my face then human waste. Next subject: After Romeo and I did our own things in the morning we met back at his house to go to the beach. He was throwing a fit on the floor because he didn t want to run an errand for his mom and bumped his finger. As he was groaning in pain his mom and I just started laughing at him. We both agreed aloud that that s what he deserves for whining. Ha. After we ran a few errands in town we went to the beach. This body boarding thing is more fun than I thought. I still freak out if I accidentally touch the ground but as long as it s not a shark or a reef shredding me to pieces I guess it s okay. He took me riding on his bike afterwards. We were riding without helmets. I swear... if he hadn t told me to put on some kind of eye protection I would be blind. As he was  geeving um on a straightaway there were a few pebbles hitting us and one hit the lens on my shades. My legs got stung but nothing serious. Note to self: wear protection. Which reminds me... Dr. Horgen and I were in the elevator, I noticed his helmet and I asked how long he had been riding. He told me for about 12 years since he was 15. 12+15=27 years old?!?!? I blurted out "Nice Try!" and he just chuckled. Maybe I should have acted like I believed him and made a comment about how I thought he was younger or something and maybe I could have gotten a few extra points on the test yesterday. Yeesh. Riiight. Better earn my grade the right way. Okay. All in all--a day of being unproductive again was A-Okay with me. 3:10:03==>Monday I just spoke to Dr. Gefroh and he informed me that I have been nominated by HPU to receive the Affiliation scholarship to WUSTL. All I have to do now is wait for it to become official and of course--get accepted. Although I am grateful for the honor of receiving such a prestigious reward, deep down I wish the scholarship was to USC. Please God help me out. 3:9:03==>Sunday Woke up from a nap and sat on the couch deciding if I should go study at Starbucks. My parents came into the living room all dressed up. I asked them where they were going and my mom told me that my dad was taking her out on a date--concert and a movie. Bleh. I told them  Gross... Get out already! They just laughed and left. I guess it s cute to see that there is still that  lovin feelin  between my parents. Okay gross. Had to get out of the house. Spent a Saturday night studying at Starbucks. It wasn t sooo bad. Els was working so he hooked me up with some food and we caught up a little. Got my study on and got all psycho again. So I left ~10 pm and picked up Romeo at his brother s house because I needed to get my calculator to finish my take home Math test. He helped me unwind and we played Grand Theft Auto: Vice City until 2 am. That helped decrease my stress level significantly. The Halo people were teasing me again. Whatever. I like video games but they play that stupid game every freakin weak. Shit. Get over it. Told Mel that and she just laughed and said it s a ritual already. Riiight. Promise to self: No Halo parties at my auntie s house for a long, long time. Reminder: Call Dr. Gefroh! Yeah. I have a feeling it s regarding the Affiliate scholarship. Kind of worried--kind of not. Find out tomorrow after I bomb another test. I swear. My head just isn t into it this semester... because  Girls just wanna have fuuun... Oh girls just wanna have fun. My last semester and I am stressing over classes that I don t even have to take. Retarded or what? Screw it. My world won t end if I get cruddy grades. Having fun is more essential to an awesome life then stellar grades. Denial... *Sigh*... 3:8:03==>Saturday Blew off most of my classes yesterday and spent the day with Romeo and his mom. We were eating at the Makai Market at Ala Moana when this lady just joins into our conversation. Yeah. She was lonely like that. So anyway the conversation progressed and eventually led to school. She asked Romeo and I what majors we were going into. She asked how much I pay for school right now and I told her that I am currently on a full ride. She praised me and told me to keep up the good work and stay away from boys. Muahaha. Romeo's mom just looked at Romeo and I and started laughing. Romeo and I quickly joined in and the lady was like... huh? I guess she thought Romeo and I were brother and sister or something. Yeesh. We had a good laugh on our way back to my car. So yeah. Spent the rest of the day shopping on line with Romeo's mom. He ditched me to go watch some racing. Oh well. Get in some bonding time with his mom. Yikes. She's cool. She's looking for a new purse. She liked the thing Romeo got for me at Coach. I think I'm going to return it. It just feels weird to have something so tiny that was worth so much. I looked inside and noticed it was made in China. Yeesh. Now I know I will return it. He doesn't want me to and told me to stop thinking about the price but it just doesn't feel right. I guess I'd feel better buying it for myself. My wallet still functions even though it looks like it'll retire any minute now. Ha. I'll go return it this weekend I hope. It's just the price for that one thing is enough to buy me food at Down to Earth for a month. I'd rather spend money on food if you know what I mean. I figure that since my credit card bill was soo low this past month due to my "no new clothes" policy... I can treat myself. Yeah. Whatever Regidia. This justifying outrageous spending is getting lame. Next subject... Romeo's cousin is listing him and I as one of the ninang and ninongs of her child. It feels weird being integrated into his family like that. I guess it feels like a big commitment to his family. I'm not even good with kids! I made Jenie's nephew cry last time. Yeah because I can be a bitch like that. Well. Cram time is on. Test on Monday. I better get out of the house or I'll continue to find something more appealing to do. Here I go again procrastinating... when I constantly tell myself that I'll never do it again. Okay... That's it for ranting... I best jet over to Starbucks. Byee. Note to self: Kris' b-day coming up. 3:7:03==>Friday My sister forwarded me this: "I guarantee you will remember the tale of the wooden bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now. A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth. The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. "We must do something about Grandfather," said the son. I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor. So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometime he had a tear in his eyeas he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence. One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled. On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I've learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life. I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life." I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back. I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you. I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one. I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone. People love that human touch - holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. I've learned that you should pass this on to everyone you care about." 3:6:03==>Thursday I figured that not living with my parents' cooking I would have to go back to eating land animals. After volunteering near the slaughterhouse I decided that maybe I should refrain from land animals just a little bit longer. I tried the vegan thing yesterday and I didn't last for a day. Not that I was craving for dairy products or fish... it's just too hard. Practically everything has some kind of animal product in it. Even the soy burgers I have at home (egg whites). Maybe when I get older, can afford it, and have more control of what kinds of foods are in the house then I'll fully convert. Little tidbit of the day: Someone told me that the McDonald's hamburgers consist of more than 50% soy. The remainder is composed of all the good parts of the animals. Yeesh. 3:5:03==>Wednesday I was driving through Barbers Point last night and the driver in front of me was driving soooo slow. To make things worse there was a motorcycle behind me and his bright ass headlights were just irritating me to no end. When the slow driver in front of me got off the street and turned into the neighborhood, I sped up a little so I could get home sooner and to get away from the damn motorcycle in back with his stupid headlight. We were approaching a stop sign and I noticed that the motorcycle was riding a little too close to my rear so I slowed my car as I approached the stop sign and when I got to the line I came to an abrupt complete STOP. The dumb ass in back almost banged me. That s what you get for tailgating! So I took the left turn and smirked. I felt smug about teaching the motorcyclist in back to not follow cars too closely then.... FUCK. Blue lights went off and I heard the whine of damn police siren. I pulled over and the damn cop approached my car and asked for the usual. I swear I saw a small smile when he glanced at my license picture. Muahaha. So anyway. He told me I was getting pulled over for speeding. Bull fuckin shit! He was probably pissed off that I stopped so quickly, he almost banged me, and that there weren t even any other cars at the intersection. I was feeling bitchy already so I curtly replied that I only went up to 40 mph and the speed limit was 35 mph. I know how to read an odometer and I know that if I contested it, it would be my word against his. He told me he d be right back. So he took my license over to his ride. The longer I waited the more pissed I became. If he was going to give me a freakin ticket he should have hurried his ass up. I had more studying to do and I don t have time to be chatting with a damn cop. It was almost 12 am and I was tired. I would have contested that shit anyway. He didn t even tag me with a gun. He came back and told me he was giving me a warning. Hey... warn THIS. He told me to just go. I told him to go ahead because his headlight was distracting. He sped away. I guess it pays to be a bitch. Normally I would have been...  Okay officer. I ll never do it again. But you know what? Don t fuck with a person who s got O.Chem on the brain--they can become sassy as hell. Screw the damn cop. Pulling over a law abiding citizen when there s fuck faces around breaking the law. I tell you one thing though. I slowed down for the rest of the night. I actually did only 30 mph near the water park where I usually cruise through between 40-45 mph. 25 mph? What the heck? Sigh. Okay. Back to studying for this stupid O.Chem Test. Moral of the story, as my dad would say,  Slow down, you have to enjoy life. ... Enjoy THIS. 3:3:03==>Monday Lent is coming up and I think I've finally figured out what to give up. Nothing to try to help myself lose weight or anything of that nature. I want to give something up to help me become a better person by helping someone or something. Last year I gave up time--time to spend with my dogs by cleaning up after them, grooming them, and making sure they play. That helped me because after Lent I continued the habit so my dogs are well taken care of--I am sure of it. My parents no longer have to bust a vein since they no longer have to go postal until me or Rome picks up their sh!t. Except that one time when my mom and I did a balcony scene... uh let's not go there. I get so wrapped up in school and all sorts of activities--anything better than cleaning up and so forth. I guess giving time up helps me put things into perspective and shows me what I can do to improve my time management. I'm not one of those lucky people who have parents or grandparents that clean the house for them that they don't have to worry whether the house is clean or not. NO. Not me. It's my job. I'm pretty much the "House Commander" now that my sister no longer resides with us. Lent is better then New Year's only because the sacrifice is only for a month compared to a year. I am giving up two hours a week throughout Lent to take care of the house. Gardening needs to be done and the trophies in the staircase... yuck. Hopefully I can stick with this so that my dad doesn't complain as much. His blood pressure is high enough. Two hours a week... the time can't be applied towards cleaning my room--must be the rest of the house. It may not seem like much, but sacrificing my leisure time really does mean a lot to me. All work and no play makes this "dumBLAWN" go nuts. 3:3:03==>Monday So I pretty much bailed on Nico's birthday party to enjoy the video game party I was hosting next door. I feel kind of bad. The fun I had kicking it with that particular group wasn't worth bailing on a friend. Stupid girl. 3:1:03==>Saturday It s March and I still haven t thrown a little get together. Time is just flying by so quickly and everyone is just wrapped up into their own worlds. No time is a good time because not everyone has their spare time at the same time. Ya know? Got the news today that Mark is flying out for Afghanistan this weekend. I can t even make it to his last VG party because it s Nico s first birthday today and I have to be there. It s at our house. My parents gave the go ahead for a party next door so we can get together there and I can attend both parties at once; but that s spreading myself too thin. We also have to attend my cousin s baby shower in Wahiawa. Goshdarnit. Why does everything seem to come simultaneously? I was supposed to go out on a date with a friend tonight but that doesn t look like it s going to happen this weekend.  Next weekend... next weekend That s always the excuse. Before we know it we ll all be graduated or off the rock that the  next weekend excuse just won t cut it anymore. Spring break is this month so that s a plus. Stairway here we come! But how many parties can we throw that week to make up for all the parties that should have been this semester? Compared to last semester... the bash throwing has been looking rather dull to me. My other friends are always down to do something but [most of] my school friends just don t have the time. Everyone needs to party once in a while to maintain their sanity. I learned that the hard way. Well. I hope Mark and the rest of the troops come back safely. As for me, I just wish my friends took a time out to just hang out just for old times sake... before it is too late and the divide is so great that being friends is just a distant memory. 2:28:03==>Friday After class my linear algebra teacher asked me where I planned to transfer after this semester. Immediately, red lights started to flash. I have a feeling she is on the committee to determine who will be awarded the Affiliate scholarship to WUSTL from HPU. I told her I am not sure. Why am I still not sure yet? Everyone else is pretty set but not me. Why is it so hard for me to decide? Frankly, I don t have $60,000+ waiting around in my bank account to withdraw to pay for my last years of college. Going from paying nothing to $30,000+ per year is a huge financial gap. So much is banking on me receiving the President s scholarship from USC. But what are my chances of that? My g.p.a. is only about 3.8. My extracurricular activities suck ass. Emphasis was placed on me working two jobs ~35 hours/week, taking 17 credits, and getting the 4-O for that semester but there are 5 more semesters to look at where I lazed around. The average transfer g.p.a. is 3.75 so that basically leaves me on the bottom side of the pool of applicants. Grrr. I won t know until May. USC WUSTL Location& closer to family Location& middle of nowhere Roomie: Neslyn Roomie: unknown ChE classes not as exciting. ChE (Envrionmental) more appealing ChE classes look interesting Do I really want to get a BS in ChE emphasizing something? & . Or do I just want a more general degree? Cost& & ~$1,000 cheaper Fashion District Better CHANCE of getting a 50% tuition waiver Racism? Parents prefer USC Dad and the KKK Figuring out my future school is so stressing. Obviously, because I keep blogging about it but this is my future that I m worried about. I guess if I just focus on what I want out of life then things will fall into place. I just hope I don t flunk out of school. To get so far and not even finish will kill me and embarrass my family. I have so much to prove. Being the naughty one& I just have to show them that I was thinking about my future all this time. Goal: Make my parents proud. Goal #2: Bioremediation. 2:27:03==>Thursday Another month. Pretty soon another year. Seven years, collectively--Whoa. Things are going great. We did homework the other day. Well more like I did homework and played video games cuz I'm talented like that. But yeah. I got to see my boy twice this week. Oh yeah. That helps bring up the average a little bit. Sad--I know; but you gotta take what you can get. He was dogging my protein supplement. My supplement is better than his. Tastes way better. He's just tripping. After our protein snack we popped in a video. I brought over my Charmed video and he was cracking up because most of his friends' significant others tape Charmed too. Coincidence? Or not? Weird. That show rocks anyway. I know. Okay. Enough. Got my first Thermodynamics test coming up. Whatever. I just need a C and it's smooth sailin' for me. Educational Objective To obtain a Baccalaureate Degree in Engineering Education 1999-2003 James Campbell High School Cumulative Grade Point Average: X.XX Academic Achievements 1999-2003 Honor Roll 2003 Who s Who Among High School Students Sports 1990-2000 Kempo 1990-2000 Judo 1990-2000 Jiu-Jitsu 1990-2000 Tae-Kwon Do 1999-2001 Junior Varsity Boy s Basketball 2000-2003 Varsity Boy s Football 2001-2003 Varsity Boy s Basketball 2003 Color Guard (Manager) High School Activities 1999-2003 Farewell Assembly 2001 Freshman/Sophomore Banquet Court 2003 Winter Ball Court 2003 Senior Banquet Court 2003 Fashion show 2003 Powder Puff 2003 Welcome Back Assembly Clubs & Organizations 1999-2000 Boys & Girls Club 2001-2003 A.G.A.P.E. Youth Ministry 2002-2003 Church Choir 2003 Hiking Club 2003 Future Farmers Of America Leadership Roles 2001 Junior Varsity Boy s Basketball Captain 2003 Varsity Boy s Basketball Captain Volunteer Activities 2001-2002 Hawaii Plantation Village 2003 Church Parking Security --------- So my brother wanted me to go over his college and scholarship stuff. Need help. I don't know what to bump from his resume. RRR. His essays... Yikes. Trying to help him out but I can't work miracles. Especially when my writing skills aren't so cherry. Oh well. Back to proofing... 2:26:03==>Wednesday "After almost seven years and if you're not sure by now then what's the point?" "But anything can happen. You just have to believe it'll work out. I have faith" "I need to know now before you leave so I know..." "Stop pressuring me. I don't want to make a promise that I can't guarantee I will keep. Things change. People change. Things will happen." "Whatever, already." 2:25:03==>Tuesday Got to waste solids today... flushing out the solids in all 14 tanks. The more time I spend there the more sure I become that my future lies in bioremediation. Sure it is pretty nasty to get sludge that came from pig shit, cow shit, blood, and what have you onto your shirt... but hey--someone's gotta do it. Why not be me? I'm pretty glad that Chad is so laid back that he doesn't even seem concerned about all the red tape like last time when I tried to volunteer at USFilter. I have more fun learning chemistry and biology there than I do in class. Sure the smell can get to you whether it be from the slaughterhouse or the water but I'm getting accustomed to it. The coolest part was when he took me out to the pond. At the surface it just looks like dirt but when I threw a rock at it the surface moved like liquid. An ecosystem at its best. Right now I'm at the Ewa Beach public library waiting for school to let out so I can go pick up a rec letter. The walls have these Japanese posters that I remember having to do when I was taking Japanese 3. Oh the memories in Japanese. Mary's snort and the one-eyed pirate will never be forgotten. Muahahaha. Okay that's it for now. 2:24:03==>Monday Today I have to decide what my chances are of going to WUSTL. Although I don't want to deprive someone who is really going to WUSTL of a 50% tuition waiver, I don't want to shoot myself in the foot either. What if for some reason I do end up in WUSTL and I have to pay full tuition because I was trying to be considerate? That would suck for me. And what are my chances anyway of getting the scholarship to USC? Grr. All this is so stressing and I still have to worry about school. Mabubay! 2:23:03==>Sunday We used to have so much fun together now I am just so uncomfortable to be around her. It all started when she would always make a comment about my body. Whatever. Some  friend . It s not like she has a perfect body. No one has a perfect body, except Angelina Jolie, of course! It just got so old when almost every time I would see her she would make at least one comment on my body. Get over it. Deep down I know I ll never want her as a friend again. I don t need that negativity. I like my body. My body got me my awesome nickname: Fatty Labelle. The point is that if you re comfortable in your own skin that s all that matters. I just don t get how jerks like that can criticize other people s body when they are... let s not go there.... Peace in the Middle East! Or as Dada would say...  Peace, love, and hair grease. 2:22:03==>Saturday Worked on my Anthropology project today. I was actually pretty scared because everytime someone was on a wave and I was just floating around an image of their board just going straight into my eye kept haunting me. Vince and Romeo had fun but not so much for me. Too chicken I guess. I talked to one random surfer who I just happened to have the guts to question... what religion are you? how long have you been surfing? what effects on the environment are you concerned about? drainage? that waikiki wall? etc. etc. Yeah. This project is going to suck. I thought Culture, Religion, and the Environment was going to be an awesome course. I thought wrong. So wrong. Okay. Batuna is bothering me about a Halo party. Pulled a ______ tonight and conveniently forgot my phone at home so I wouldn't answer friends calls who I know would ask where I was when I was supposed to be kicking it with them. Ya feel me? Els... ya know what I'm talking about? Muahaha. I better shut up already. So anyway the strip bar plan did not go through. Jason could have taken my bro and his friends in but they couldn't cough up the money. Yeah right. He was probably worried they'd be too giddy inside and embarass him so he told them they had to pay an outrageous entrance fee. Blah blah. I keep calling my boyfriend "Rome." That's what I call my brother! EEW. Rome Hun. One syllable.. Fairly similar. I'm not having nasty thoughts about my brother--I SWEAR. Just too many Romeo's too keep straight. Okie dokie. Gotta go home now. HismomaskedifitwasmineandIwasn'tsure.Shamenow.IcouldhaveswornIbroughtithomewithme.Weird.HateitwhenIleavestuffandshewashesit.WeirdWeirdWeird. 2:21:03==>Friday I m sick. I can't keep my damn mouth shut about Venus... Just bombed my Anthropology test... baD graDe on my O. Chem test. Sick out of my mind. Nose is stuffed. Back hurts. Chest feels congested. Man. Can life get any better? Plus I just got my confirmation letter from USC and the damn shit is stamped for Feb. 11! WTF? Am I disqualified from the scholarships or what? The FUCK word can t even sum up my frustration. I d need a whole sentence... possibly even more. GRRRR. Well ANYWAYS. Life sucks sometimes. Suck it up, right? Whoever thought of that can kiss my talaga ng pissed-off-at-the-world ASS. So I talked to Dr. G today and he reminded me that the WUSTL applications are due soon. Not to worry. Got those filled out a long time ago. I meet with him this Monday when I will tell him how sure I am of going to WUSTL. This morning I was thinking 25% chance... now it s at 50% knowing of my possible scholarship disqualification at USC. Basically, I m pretty sure that the 50% affiliate scholarship is mines for the taking if I do go to WUSTL. BUT... My mind is on USC simply because... just because. I have my reasons. I thought I would feel bad if I just applied to WUSTL, got the scholarship and go to USC instead... thus wasting a perfectly good scholarship. The thing is that once they award the scholarship to a WUSTL applicant from HPU and that particular student does not go... then no one gets that scholarship. I think I know who would get the scholarship if I don t apply. But what if I do go to WUSTL and the scholarship that should have been mine was given to her because I wasn t sure? What? Do I make sense any more? When you re this freaked out making sense is not an issue. It s not like me and her are close anyway so I probably shouldn t feel bad but still. *Sigh* Screw it. I ve busted my ass for my gpa and taken all the classes required and then some... I deserve the prestige of just being awarded that scholarship. Geez I m such a bitch. But fuck. You gotta do what you gotta do. [Attempt at trying to cheer myself up] I guess the bright side is that this fucked up week is over. Romeo and I are not fighting and he promised me a massage this weekend. Thermodynamics homework is relatively easy. My window works. Uh... my parents finished varnishing the floor. I dunno already. Whateva. 2:20:03==>Thursday Two tests, a formal laboratory report, and hard ass Thermo homework all due tomorrow. To top it all off I'm sick and have a major headache and my nose keeps running away. Son of a MONKEY! I will survive. But then again... do I really have a choice? I just have to suck it up for 2.5 more years. The futrue is looking bright... Yeahhh.. riiight. 2:19:03==>Wednesday Fack. I studied so hard for my O.Chem test and I still bombed it. Dammit. Whatever. The crappy thing is that I just learned that I won't be able to take this class credit/no credit now... DAMN 2:18:03==>Tuesday The laptop I wanted wasn t in stock at CompUSA. They tried to push me towards an HP but goshdarnit... pass me a Toshiba!!! They didn t even have the complete digital imaging kit so I guess I ll wait for the next awesome deal and just head straight there. I even had my credit card ready to charge it all but I guess I ll have to wait. No biggie. I don t have to write any mad csci programs anymore so I ll survive without a laptop until I transfer. Even if I did have to write programs I wouldn t have used it since I might have fooked up my drive because I m an awesome programmer like that. Well my new stint was cool. It s right next to a slaughterhouse so the smell was awesome Got to test the water quality. Got splattered a little with the water which wasn t too cool but fookit. Pig shit and cow manure in water... awesome. Got to run other tests too. My arm was getting an awesome workout when I had to run the probe for the water quality test. The project manager is like an aging skater boi so ish coo... WCC students are going to check out the machine next week so I think I ll go later to avoid the crowd. After that... I headed out to Starbucks to get my study on even with some funky stains on my white HPU shirt. lol. Saw one of the members of my high school  familia *smirk* caught up on a few of them and exchanged e-mail addresses. Surprise surprise someone is pregnant. Yeah, that shocked me the first gazillion times but not so much anymore. Ain t my promblemo. And I used to wonder why I stopped kickin it with them anymore. Hate to admit it but Romeo was right: my friends are nuts. So yeah... as soon as Romeo and his boys showed up to study I hung out a bit then zoomed out of there. That s my day in a nutshell. I never did get that adage. Anyhow. One last thing. I want to drink this weekend. Video game party next door? Or a Karaoke party at my house? Ah.. We ll see. Couple more days to figure it out 2:16:03==>Friday Last night we partied at Venus for Chantelle birthday. She finally came out and hit her 21 jackpot. Congratulations to her. Got our groove on and all and watched others get theirs on too... Slam hooked up Romeo, Kris, and I with strawberry shots. Chantelle was also hooking herself up and she looked a little phased after awhile. Whole lotta corrupttion going around if ya know what I mean (all fingers point to Els!!!). Romeo and I went home, showered, ate, and slept. When Romeo finally woke up he fixed my car window. It only took him half an hour. To replace the motor. It took my dad and I almost 2 hours. It s funny how Romeo and my dad compare their automotive skills on my car. Romeo changed my oil once and when my dad changed it next he kept complaining about every little thing... eg. the white stuff Romeo used around the screws, stripped nuts. Romeo complained about his carelessness with the maintenance... lalala. When I told Romeo what he said he started snapping. Geez. I have to admit though... my dad is getting old. I m really grateful that my man knows how to work with his hands. I swear my dad would really like Romeo if he just gave him a chance. He can be almost like the son that he never had because God knows my brother just goes out and mooches off my parents and doesn t even help as much around the house. I m working with my dad more often then he is and I m a girl. But here s my boyfriend paying his way through school, paying his own car insurance, and ladidadida. His independence just shocks me because I depend on my parents sooo much. I m really proud of him. Now my window is fixed so it s no longer humbug to go through the drive thru s. If you've ever ridden in my g-hetto ass car... then ya know what I mean. Gosh I my man, my neckless, chubby wonderboy. Good.. really good with his hands, sensitive, someone I can be serious with and yet still have time outs to play chase masters or whatever kiddie games we still play, my jan ken po opponent, he makes me laugh, and makes me mad; we fight a lot but somehow we always find our way through. Whenever things look bleak and we re both ready to bail something always clicks and we re right back on track. Seven years this May and I m still looking forward to a lifetime. What pisses me off though is this damn double standard. I love my parents and all but they need to treat my brother and I more equally. Basically: Gina was in his room on Valentine s and when they came home they were civil and he didn t even get busted. I guess it was kinda good for me since they cut me some slack that night. I got the "where are you phone call" at 5am and nothing before that so that was awesome. Thought I'd get the boyfriend lecture again. Anyway. The other day I came home with a tetanus shot and my parents go ballistic thinking it s a depo shot. My mom keeps my brother s condom supply stocked. What the farck? When my bro and I were sitting on the couch side by side my dad basically high-fives my brother about having another girlfriend and shakes his finger at me saying  I don t like that Romeo Romeo... no boyfriend boyfriend bit. Double standard up the ying yang in this household. My dad can sqeeze in his comments if he likes but I've tested him time and time again and nothing happens. I know how to work it when I need to save my ass and I know what I want and ain't nothin' gonna stop me. Being a daddy s girl has its perks but my dad just has to let go and realize that I m growing up. I ve got a really good man and my parents just need to be happy for me. I know the  Mina curse my sister and I joke about is prevalent in my family but I m more focused than that.... err. Which reminds me... I better manage my time more wisely so I better go. Volunteering on Tuesday. O.Chem test on Wednesday. Formal lab report due Thursday. Work from 7:30-11:00 am Friday. Math test on Friday. Anthropology test on Friday night. Woohoo. This week is gonna rock... Did I mention I still have to help out with putting base coves and floor varnish this week? Muahahahahaha. Ai sus! Fookit. Just gotta get to Saturday. I see a possible Halo party in the mix~~~ Uh no. 2:13:03==>Thursday I got bebe s Valentine s Day present good to go. A pair of Scott s& inside joke I hope the dinner he s making me doesn t come out too funky since he s substituting a good chunk of his usual recipe to take my being a semi-vegetarian into account. How sweet. I know it drives my family and Romeo crazy when they try to figure out what to feed me. They all need to relax because I will find a way. My dad kept slicing kiwi fruits the other day and kept talking away until I finally stuffed a couple of slices into my mouth. I love my dad and all but he needs to stop worrying about my outrageous diet. Yesterday my dad and I went out to lunch. We scanned the menu at the new Filipino restaurant in Kapolei but had to leave since they didn t really have a lot of dishes that I would be willing to eat. We went to Quizno s instead. Got a 50% discount on our tab since one of our renters work there. Awesome. The sandwich wasn t all that. I guess I ll stick to Subway. Which reminds me& I think when I transfer I ll eat 6 in. of a Subway sandwich for breakfast, another for lunch, and Ramen for dinner. See. Who said I won t find a way to eat when I m on my own? Hopefully my sister visits often so I can eat really good. 2:13:03==>Thursday I ve opened up a can of worms and now I m getting eaten alive. Things should be on a need to know basis. The past should be left alone. Curiosity really does kill the cat. I know now. 2:12:03==>Wednesday No school for me today... I just don't feel like it. The best thing is that I have homework that's supposed to be turned in and my ass is still in my house. But you know what? I don't give a funk. 2:11:03==>Tuesday Got a tetanus shot today. Dammit. I could have sworn I got all of my shots! damn romeo. Before I was so rudely interrupted. I went to the doctor today for my dog bite. They just dressed it and sent me packing. I knew it was no biggie but my parents kept getting on my case. Romeo and I spent the rest of the day together. We haven't done that in a LONG time. Usually we just see each other two times a week; if we're lucky. We cruised the mall to go shopping for a present and yeah... Just wasting time with him was kind of relaxing... catching up on what's really going on in each other's lives and a whole lotta chiding. I have a ton of thermo homework but it doesn't faze me. Credit/ no credit = chill out. We're in Bebe's room right now and he's going crazy because apparently Smallville won't be on tonight due to a UH baseball game. I understand his pain. If Charmed isn't on because of a game I throw a fit as well. We both don't watch a lot of time to stare at the TV so when the show that we actually do make an effort to watch isn't on then -- watch out! Romeo dressed my dog bite today. He was so gentle. Ho shit. I just saw on tv that piper will give birth this week on charmed. Oh yeah. Anyway. While I was watching him a sweet thought of him dressing a wound of one of our future children, maybe, came into my mind. I'm sure he'll make a great father some day. He's even letting me eat all the chocolate in his house to distract me from the pain. It doesn't help but eating a whole lotta chocolate won't kill me. Maybe I should give it another go to see how long I can live without chocolate...so far a month is the most. Maybe after valentine's. I'm eating sooo much chocolate. Better start eating more moderately. Ah. Romeo just found out that Smallville will be at 9pm. So I guess I'll leave then. Until then, I should do some homework... 2:10:03==>Monday Frick. I just spent about 15-20 minutes replying and cancelling stupid e-mail subscriptions that I didn't even know I signed up for. Stupid junk mail. Irk the shit out of people like me. If I need their services or products I will contact them. Other than that they should just leave me and my farkin' mailbox alone. 2:9:03==>Sunday I was working an equation and I realized that I rely so heavily on my calculator. I can't even remember simple integration formulas. Like the integral of 1/x^2! I tried to work it out by hand but my mind drew a blank. I know what the answer is supposed to be but I couldn't remember how to get there. Scary. I better stop turning to my calculator so quickly. Well work today was awesome. They finally let me be a floater. Basically... go wherever you're needed. Unfortunately they made me hop back at check in right when the mother load of Mexicans arrived. Yup. Out of 22,000 passengers---600 were Mexican. Their passports are like.. "?" Most of them didn't even speak English. That part of work sucked but for the most part it was okay. John keeps trying to talk to me but I ain't having it. He gives me the creeps. It's as if he can't get it into his head that I have a boyfriend so he better stop flirting, ya know? My sore is getting puffy. My parents are yelling at me to go to the doc to check it out. Damn. Stupid Wung-yoh. 2:8:03==>Saturday FFRRRRIIIIIICCK. (AB)^-1 = B^-1* A^-1 not A^-1 * B^-1. Why the fuck can't matrices be commutitive? Dammit. Kissed my 100% goodbye. An-e-waze. Got an e-mail from Slam about eating dinner at hard rock. Were we still going to take her to the show at Venus? We'll see. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Stupid jerry curl bit the shit out of my leg. Dumb poodle. I swear they better stop fighting or I will disown them! Frick man. They're always vying for my attention. Once one dog sees that I'm petting the other they start fighting. Shit man. It's like David and Goliath is battling it out on my balcony. Those dogs need to chill. I've got enough love for the both of them. Especially Wung-yoh... Thinks he's all tough and all. It's outrageous when I let him downstairs to play with Butch. Wungs picks a fight and sends Butch running for his life. The thing is.. Wung-yoh is a ten pound poodle and Butch is a 60 pound pit bull. It's ridiculous when you see the little white dog chasing around this huge wuss. Geez. Some guard dog we have. Butch needs to suck it up and kick the shit out of Wung-yoh so he stops being so feisty. Grrr. Well. I've finally decided on my anthropology project. I'm studying surfers. Wonderful! I get to chill at the beach, learn <scratch that> TRY to learn how to surf, and do my observations for the project. Grrrreat. Now I just have to get over my fear of what's under the water. I love to swim. But whenever I think of the ocean bottom I freak out. When I'm swimming at Ko Olina I swim so much faster when I'm in the middle of the lagoon. I can still remember when I went snorkeling in Ko Olina in the sixth grade. All the crab holes on the floor just gave me chicken skin. Gross. I guess the whole concept of hidden dangers, you know? From the surface the ocean looks really beautiful but when you take a peak at the ocean floor you see all these things that the beautiful water is concealing.. yeesh. What a wuss. I know. I hope bebe comes with me to the beach. I like when we're paddling out on our bodyboards. I make sure that he's in front of me... his bubble ass. What an awesome view from behind. Big belly and big ass. My kind of man Muahahha. He has less than 30% body fat but his belly is still huge. No matter how much he pumps weights he still looks fat. I have to admit though.... you can pinch way more fat on me then you can on him. I hate to admit it but he's finally in better shape than I am. When we play chase masters I always give up first. I always lose nowadays but hey... who's counting? Just because he can press 300 lbs. He still got nothing on me. I can bench the whole bar... a total of.... 45 freakin' pounds. Whoa. Watch out! My brother baked chocolate chip cookies. When he went to his room to answer his phone I kadoffed two cookies. He came into the living room and asked me where they were and I told him "I don't know!" Yeah. Liked that worked. Especially with a mouthful of cookies. Retard. So he went to the kitchen and licked the tops of the rest of the cookies. Damn. He was sick but I reached for another anyway. He moved the tray and stuffed as much as he could into his mouth. I managed to snatch one... drool and all. I ate it anyway. He's my little brother. Even if he's sick, it's cool. I have an awesome immune system. That licking your food thing just does not work with me. Nothing will stand in the way of me and warm chocolate chip cookies. Good thing I broke my resolution because those cookies were gooood. Batuna called for a night of Halo at Allen's house. Man. Maybe next time. I can show off my mad skills that I picked up in San Fran. Yomama. I still suck in that game. I had to pass tonight since I have this mad date tonight... with my farkin' O. Chem book. That explains why I'm so chatty. I'm going nuts being so efficient today. Just finished doing chores, reading about the Andes... whole day affair, filling out scholarship apps... now all that's left on my weekend agenda is O. Chem. So I better go shower. 2:7:03==>Friday First test is today and I still can't get myself to study. Matrices. Yeesh. Hope I pass. I missed the bus today so I had to walk all the way back home and drive myself to school. Frick. I was looking forward to catching the bus. For some reason, I'm beginning to despise driving by myself. I'm grateful that I can drive though, so I better shut up. A matrix times its inverse is the identity matrix... whaaa? We can't even use our graphing calculators. I feel so naked without it. We need to prove that we can actually perform row reductions, additions, etc. by hand. Damn. Pity the people way back when who had to do these long ass calculations ALL the time. Two or three pages front and back of a long ass calculation can be computed by the wonderful ti-89 in less than five seconds... GOD bless technology!!!! Kinda freaky how war with Iraq seems eminent. 2:5:03==>Wednesday I had my first Com 3300 class this past Monday. Uyehara is awesome. She really understood that a 5 pm class is pretty hard on the mind and tried her best to keep us awake. If all upper division Com courses are fun like that... screw science class. She even let us go an hour and half early. Man. None of my other classes really let us go that early before! Okay. I better get back to this scholarship application. I can't believe they're charging an application fee! The first two times I got it we didn't have to pay and suddenly BAM.. gotta cough up $50 just to apply. Shit. I hope I get it. continuation.... Frack.... got home today from school and was super hungry. Choice between crab and junk food. Guess what choice I made? JUNK FOOD!!! I broke my New Year's resolution and ate all the chocolate I could handle. Chocolate candy bars (Mr. Goodbar, Krackle, Hershey's, etc. ) and chocolate chip cookies... then I washed it all down with a glass of milk. What do you expect? Those things were in my fridge for the longest of time just calling " REGIDIA " so I finally gave in and got rid of a good portion of it. Frick. I did pretty good for myself though. A whole month with no chocolate candy... that means a lot to a chocoholic like me! I thought I could keep my New Year's resolution a second year in a row because I know I bought less than six pairs of shoes last year. errr. The other couple of pairs were from Romeo Loopholes are grrreat, huh Els? When my brother got home and saw all the candy wrappers, he kept dawging me about breaking my resolution. Who cares? IT WAS WORTH IT. NOW I CAN CONCENTRATE. I will try to salvage my resolution though and keep my chocolate consuming to a minimum.. YEAH RIGHT. There's a whole mound of rochere candy at Romeo's house and I've meaning to get at it since I got back from Vegas. BEBE... here I come. Better hide those goodies from me if you want some for your family. Gawd. Normally chocolate doesn't last that long at Romeo's house because I eat it. Who am I to break that trend? Next time I'm there, I'm pounding that stuff into my mouth. God I feel so liberated for some reason. 2:4:03==>Tuesday My dad and I completed another bench today. We jammed it and finished it in an hour. It took us two hours the first time. As soon as he brought out the wood I just went ahead and sawed away. My fingers are intact so I guess that's a good sign. Congratulations to Melissa. She just got a full-time job. Cool. Maybe we can celebrate this weekend because I'm not sure if everyone else was up for Karaoke again tonight. Okay. I start the teeth experiment tonight I guess. Hope my teeth doesn't fall out. 2:3:03==>Monday I felt like such a nerd today in Thermodynamics. I'm the only one that was able to turn in the algebra homework. Hahaha. Yeah. Algebra rocks. Even though I'm pretty good at it, it has no application to the real world. Book smart = no common sense for this blonde. This weekend was fun. Romeo and I finally did something together... waited in line for some football players signature at Ala Moana. Greeeat. The Pro Bowl experience was kind of fun too. We both tried to throw the football into the little puka. Shoot. My only goal was to throw the darn ball far enough to hit the sign but... nooo. There should have been more girls in line to show those guys how to really throw. Riiight. Okay so it's past three days and if you got my e-mail regarding those death e-mails... I'm still alive. Mua Ha Ha Ha Ha. Too bad because I'm not exactly looking forward to jury duty. Yeah. I got the summons for jury duty. I hope I don't get picked to actually serve. At least I got it deferred to the first day of Spring Break instead of 2-24-03. When I used the "I have school execuse" the lady asked if I was a Nursing Major. Hey. Just because I'm a filipina.... what's going on? Okay I better go eat. I'm craving for sushi. P.S. If anyone wants to try those crest whitening strips.. they're on sale at Daiei and Kmart for $24.99 and there is also a $7.00 coupon in the Sunday paper... aaah set. I wanna see if they actually work. My teeth better not fall off! 1:31:03==>Friday Had to work from 730-1100 today. What a bitch. Especially since I have class until 2010 tonight. The morning drive wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. The traffic was light and Romeo entertained me. Even though I live in the farthest "suburb of Kapolei" I still beat Romeo to Village Park. He was at 7-eleven, Ewa, when I was just leaving my front gate. Yeah. That just proves that Ewa Beach sucks--biggest cul de sac on the island. Muahaha. He did catch up near the Kaahumanu overpass since that idiot drove in the Express lane. Me and my shoulder lane action didn't work all that much. When he finally spotted me on the road he told me to look to my left and there he was--rolling up in his old ass VW Jetta. My own boyfriend is one of those drivers that I despise. You know what I mean? Those rude people who drive in the car pool lanes when it is SOOOO obvious they are the only ones in the car! When I was scolding him over the phone... he just said I don't have to worry because no idiotic cop would pull him over in morning traffic just because he was driving in the lane where he wasn't supposed to be. If people keep doing that with the same mentality... why do we even have that express lane. Drivers like that.... so not right. Shit. I know, I know. A lot of the traffic signals don't know SHIT. Like take my Honokai turn for example. It's so freakin' clear but people can't make the left until they get the green arrow. Frack that! SOOO many people run that red. That's the only light I run on purpose--constantly. I even run that red when someone I don't know is behind me. We're all in it together. Gosh we're all rebels up in that Honokai G-Hetto.. Pshah. But EVERYONE runs that red, seriously. I even ran it with my mom and dad in the car and they didn't scold me since they do the same thing at that light. Sure there might be a cop but they just gotta understand. That light is STUPID. Ha. When I saw the intersection my sister designed she got so much crap from us. I still think she's retarded for not doing anything about the island. If you see that intersection you'll agree... the person who designed it is retarded. Muahahaha. So yeah. I got a little busted from Mr. Nakaguma for sending him a crappy resume. Sheez. He's still awesome though. He taught me my new favorite word: bioremediation (sp?) Yeah... bioremediation = my dream job. Okie dokie. Enough relaxing. Better book it to Thermodynamics. Cheewho~ P.S. Mark and Jenie gave me my Christmas present today. Jenie wrapped my present in the pantyhose box I used for her present LAST christmas. She even used the same note inside. So mental. She cracks me up. I know what box I'll be using for her Christmas present this year.... The shot glass she gave me makes me want to throw another video game/drinking water party. Let's see... just gotta see when people are available. The last time we were there was what... November?? 1:30:03==>Thursday I have a scholarship due this Saturday... and what? I haven't started yet! GRR. What a Ms. Dumas. Teachers are awesome. Pumping out recommendation letters at such a short notice. Dr. Gefroh and Mr. Nakaguma are awesome :) 1:29:03==>Wednesday Woohoo. Got my cigarette case. It's actually better than I expected. I was chatting w/ Slam's friend, Karen, last night. Karen goes to USC and didn't mind me asking ridiculous questions. After my onslaught of questions we just talked a little. She cracked me up. My fears are being laid to rest and so now I'm hoping even more that I get accepted to USC. Romeo and I still haven't seen each other. I miss him. I better stop typing already and do something more productive. Pshah. Yeah my lab notebook is calling my name. 1:28:03==>Tuesday This is the last thing I'll buy from e-bay for a whole month. No more wasting money on frivolous things. I love working with my hands. I guess it's the tomboy in me. After I met my quota for the Polynesian book (50 pages/day) I helped my dad with some house work. It took us a while but we finally assembled the bench he's been putting off for a couple of months. My dad and I argued a little because he didn't want to use the table saw. My dad and a handheld.... uh no. After I finished justifying which tool to use we went with the table saw. I measured out 2x4x4's and cut out a few. The power of the saw and the screeching of the wood as the saw makes its way through... gosh... makes me remember my childhood days. After a lot of sweatin' my dad and I finally finished the bench. We sat on it for awhile and basked in our glory. It felt good to finish it. When my dad and I went next door for more wood my neighbor commented on what a great helper I am. Sometimes I think my dad wished I were a boy because usually we are the duo doing the "manly" stuff around the house. I benefit though. I learn how to use power tools and pick up a few tips on cars. Yeah my retarded brother... he dared argue with me about the sound my car was making. I do know if my car is making a different sound. I hate it when he takes my car.... I know he acts stupid with it. I actually diagnosed my car problem correctly and my dad just laughed at my bro and patted me on the back. That's right panty! Muahaha. Anyhow... I'm debating if I should drop my Chemical Thermodynamics and Kinetics course. It's not as exciting as I thought it would be. I hate it when teachers tell you how to perform calculations in a certain way. Nothing against Bozlee but the material is pretty dry. Shit. I'm pretty sure we all know how to do partial derivatives so why can't we get to the interesting stuff already? Yeesh. Cyclic rule.. cycle this! Okay. I better go kiss Romeo's ass. I've been cutting dates lately and he's pretty disappointed. The thing is my dad really appreciates it if my brother and I are home because he likes to cook for us... yeah. What a great dad. But Romeo was complaining because he wanted to cook dinner for me tonight... and we didn't even see each other yesterday--our anniversary. Sigh. I promised him Thursday so I hope I don't break another date... 1:25:03==>Saturday Awesome. UHM is tentatively scheduling the Applied Mechanics I course that I need to take so I'm hoping they finalize that so I know if I will be going to school this summer. Yay. A whole summer term studying the mechanics of still objects. Woohoo... totally stoked--NOT. The crappy thing is that they will most likely offer it during summer session I which coincides with my family's planned trip here. Unlike this past summer where I would party till 4 am, do homework throughout the day and take my cousins around town then go back to class for four hours four days a week.... and pass both classes... I doubt I'd be able to pull that off with this particular class. We'll see... XXX crossing them fingers and toes. Actually it shouldn't be too bad. My brother is graduating in late May so he won't have football practice...so maybe all the cousins can kick it with him while I be the boring one this time, as always :). YEAH RIGHT. Knowing my cousins they'll drag me because they know I study too much. Dada, Ro, Rynell, John, and Dean. Crap.. Looks like we'll all be pimpin' in the family van this summer. Just hope the boys don't clown Dean too much because I knew he pulled a drama last summer with Adora. It will be an interesting summer. If only I didn't have that class to worry about. Spent my Saturday reading about the Polynesian Family System. I plan on doing homework all tonight as well. Went out on Thursday and Friday so it compensates for my laziness now. I don't really feel like singing karaoke tonight anyhow. I do feel bad especially when Jen gave me the guilt trip about leaving soon but next time. A few people have asked when the next house party at my aunt's will be... I think not for a while. Sometimes it just feels like it takes too much energy to be sociable. Ha. Even my brother is staying home tonight. Odd because only my parents are the ones who went out. Sometimes I like to stay home and just relax. I hope that doesn't make me a social reject. If it does.. I don't give a rip. I like my life. My brother and Kenji actually kicked it with Romeo and I last night. They cracked us up with their antics. I like how my brother likes Romeo--my brother even called him to take him to the hospital when he twisted his ankle this past winter. ~~~But when Kenji told one of their friends that he was at "Romeo's brother's house" they both ganged up on him and told him to shut up or get a beat down from the Romeo squad. Muahaha. So yeah. That was how I spent last night. That and just talking story with Romeo after those two "ghetto ass nickas" left. Okay. My Polynesian Family system is calling my name. I better go read. Failure. What if I flunk out? All the money--wasted on a failure. I've been going to 'easy' schools my whole life. What if I just can't cut it at a big time university? USC has one of the best engineering schools in America. Man. The uncertainty is just killing me. Hank said I'll do just fine but he barely knows me. Just because Dr. Gefroh and I let him see my entire application doesn't mean he knows me. Grades don't necessarily mean you learned anything or if you'll succeed in life. RRR. So frustrated. 1:24:03==>Friday Congratulations to me.... I finally sent in my USC application so next up: WAITING. My legs are so sore. Romeo and I exercised yesterday. He rode the bike and I ran. When I was getting tired he packed me. Poor bike. ~350 lbs. on those poor tires. It didn't pop so that was good. We played 3 rounds of chase masters. I LET him win. Punk. I was tired because... er.... I had been running and that phat ass rode the bike. After that we showered and just lounged around and ate... like usual. I kept bothering him and he gave me a freakin' wet willy. What kind of boy gives their girlfriend a wet willy? I let him slide because I didn't want to pick a fight so he wouldn't give me crap for going out. He did seem pretty irked when we swung back to his house for the special cups. Melissa threw a little Karaoke party. Man. I took one banana pie shot and my head just wanted to hit the pillows. I don't know if it's because I was mega tired or my tolerance is WEAK. Probably the latter. Melissa... guarantee we got a lot of pictures for her to make a shirt for her. One day we all have to wear those shirts.. maybe at camp. Zach did his Missy Elliot dance went we tried to sing work it. That rocked. The good thing is I was home by two so I got at least 6 hours of sleep. Same old same old. Matt asked me out today. I told him my boyfriend wouldn't like that too much. So he got my number anyway so we could hang in a group. I'll bring my boyfriend. Yayhoo. I won my auction on ebay. Cig case... here you come. 1:22:03==>Wednesday This day rocked. Dr. Gefroh and I got together and my application is pretty much good to go. After that I had a linear algebra class with a lot of engineering majors that are totally cool. We pretty much have our plan of keeping in touch if we all get into usc and wustl to get our networking show on the road. My bus ride home was cool too because it only took me an hour to get home. That's almost the same time if I were to catch the shuttle back to Hawaii Loa then drive my ass home. Whoppee. I did my bit for the environment today. After I got home..... I found out.... that... I'm missing some money from my wallet. I guess it's partly my fault for letting people scope my stuff w/o even thinking anything of it. Note to self: Don't trust people. I hate it when people steal from me. It makes me feel stupid for being inattentive and my faith in humanity is just shot down once again. I don't know whether I should confront this person because I'm sure the act may have been captured on tape since it was probably done in the student lounge or just let it slide and silently look at the suspected culprit with jaded eyes. I have no proof... so if I do confront her and she just denies it, then what? I guess without the proof I just better keep my mouth shut. This is the last fuckin time already. Only if I trust the fuckin' person will they ever get to take a peak in my shit. I just have that sick feeling in my stomach right now--betrayal is a bitch. What a way to top the day after an awesome day of school. What I really learned today: TRUST NO ONE! 1:21:03==>Tuesday What is REALLY going on? I spoke to three different people and all of them changed their major recently... like within the past week kind of recently. Wow. Good luck to them all in their new majors and hopefully they enjoy it.~ 1:20:03==>Monday I've finally finished my scholarship essay after much procrastination. It was so difficult to write. I wish I was a better writer but I better appreciate the skills I do have. I was flipping through my Chem. Thermo and Kinetics book and I saw so many calculus symbols. I hope the course isn't too hard and that I haven't forgotten all my calculus. I can't wait to see if I do get the 50% scholarship. $15k a year is a lot of money to save. I saw this Coach bag that I really want. Omigosh. I better exercise some restraint on my finances. The good financial news is that I finally found a Visa credit card with cash back and no annual fee. Yay. Another way to mooch off rich banks. Which reminds me. I'm still pretty irked that I was missing $20 from my withdrawal. I counted it twice in honolulu and again in Vegas and I'm sure that damn American Savings Bank jipped me. They better fix it. When it comes down to getting cheated I can be a bitch. Which reminds me... I was shoe shopping in Too Hot and I overheard this couple talking to the sales clerk about the efficiency of American education. They were saying stuff how us American kids are not as educated as Europeans and that our geography was poor. Frick that shit. I know my European countries and capitals if you like... jerks and I fricken' graduated from Campbell. It made me even madder when the clerk agreed and added her two cents. I normally would have just walked out but I saw this really cute pair of sandals that I just had to have. So after that prejudice couple left I went up to the register to pay for my shoes. The lady forgot to give me my penny change (normally I wouldn't care) but I demanded that I have my penny and my sister just looked at me like I was the cheapest bizatch in the world and then I looked at the sales lady and told her that at least my American education was good enough to know how to make proper change. She gave me a mean stink eye as she handed over my penny. Frick her. Why is she even here in America? We must be doing something right if our economy is doing good... relatively speaking. Ugh. I hate to admit it but I was getting pretty irritated with the Mexican population. This is America so why was it that there were so many translations everywhere? If they're going to work and live here they better know some English? Right? Geez. Ah. Okay I better go back to proof reading. Yay. Only two more days until school... Great to have no school on Tuesday. 1:19:03==>Sunday Instead of finishing up my essays I took this IQ test instead at "http://c4.excite.com/adclick/CID=0000867e70d73a7100000000/AREA=COMMUNICATIONS.EMAIL/SITE=excite/AAMSZ=550x150/CM=9340/CR=6623/AD=528" I only scored 133 but that's okay because our psychology teacher taught us that the IQ test does not show how smart you are ladidadida so that offers me a little comfort. First time taking an IQ test... interesting. Makes your brain get back into thinking mode I guess. Well I finally found a buyer for my Computer Science book. I give it to him on Tuesday. Woohoo. No more computer science. I was going through my O.Chem book and this thought that maybe chemical engineering isn't for me just ran across my mind. What if I take a few ChE courses and realize that it's not for me? Then what? I don't have a back up plan! Omigosh. What if I never find a job at a sewage plant? What if I have to work at a petroleum plant instead? WAAAAH? Does anyone ever really know what they'll do with their lives? Who they'll spend the rest of their lives with or where they'll live? I need to get a grip. I hope I'll remember my excitement as I toured the water recycling plant when I'm stressing in school. The UV tank... the sandbox, knowing I'd be taking part in preserving the water supply. Sigh. Okay. I just got a grip. Crazy woman. I was watching my videotapes of my trip and with my parents planning to go to the P.I. next winter I realized that I won't really have a reason to come home. Maybe I'll spend the year away from the islands. We'll see. I better stop getting ahead of myself because I am beginning to freak myself out. I can't even finish one page of my scholarship paper and here I am ranting and raving. Frick. 1:18:03==>Saturday My sister wants to take up a second job to help offset the cost of her upcoming trip to Australia. Her boss told her that he must clear it with her before she starts to work anywhere else saying that it is against their code of conduct. I mean... she won't be able to work at fast food joints or anything. Darn. I would have loved getting hooked up at in-n-out. How odd. It's supposedly beneath their profession. Hahaha. She shouldn't have gone on salary. If she just worked hourly and put in a few hours of overtime the pay would be equivalent to a part time job. My big sis. Sigh. I'm so proud of her. As soon as I walked in to her house I was taken aback at how much stuff she has. For one little girl she had a whole lotta crap laying around the house. I did love this table she made out of old plan rolls (sturdier and larger versions of toilet rolls). I thought it was painted pieces of wood but when I was staring at it I finally realized what they are. How creative. Yawn. I was cleaning out my room the other day and opened up an old shoe box full of letters from friends and stuff. I read a few and laughed. I don't even keep in touch with a majority of my high school friends. I guess that druggie world was just not for me. Speaking of which.... Batula is graduating. Congratulations to her! When she told me... we mentioned how time really has flown and breifly discussed the times we would kick it together before school and our little adventures in Ewa Beach together. Ha. I asked my brother what he was going to major in and he wasn't sure. I mentioned Nursing and he sounds rather interested. We'll see. My brother, a nurse? Well he got the Filipino part down... 1:16:03==>Thursday Going throught the motions, filling out forms, writing essays... the constant butterflies are dying off. Once they're all mailed in it will be in someone else's hands. Sigh. I took Butch to our usual spot in Campbell Industrial. He got fat. I'm so glad. He actually ran and explored the grass. Unlike last time where he just walked super slow and looked miserable and too skinny. I usually don't keep him on a leash when we run which is why I freaked out when a fireman was jogging and Butch just ran up to him. I yelled at the fireman "He doesn't bite, I SWEAR!" He just laughed it off, told me he could protect himself, and reassured me that it's okay since my dog was only protecting me. I grabbed his leash, apoligized again, and walked away. Thank God Mr. Fireman was cool like that. I let Butch off the leash again after awhile so he could go chase things in the grass again. He's such a good dog. If only he stopped scratching up our front door. He must me losing it or something. School starts soon and I'm actually looking forward to it. My schedule rocks which makes the semester seem even brighter. Woohoo. Okay. 1:15:03==>Wednesday As the plane landed I got this sick feeling in my tummy and felt the hard slap of reality telling me to wake up and get my ass in gear. No more being a full-time bum... shucks. It was super duper while it lasted. SIGH. FUC|<. Here goes my last farkin' semester on this island... hopefully. I'm kinda scared but I really want to leave already. So sick. Just figuring out where I'll be next semester is nuts. I just know I have to live away from my mother. Bad regi bad. Bad thought again. I better not go there. USC is really nice, ghetto nearby but the campus is like.. WOW. I guess comparing it to the HPU campus... really makes it look even more nicer. Muahaha. I just hope I get accepted and find a way to roll out the bills. SIgh... SIGH... It's like being a damn high school farkin' senior all over again. SHIT. Guess this means less time with Romeo. That's okay. Who needs to play chase masters all the time any way? He cheats anyway. I swear... the next time we play I'm bringing my damn camcorder so there's proof whether the tag was made before running to base. So ANYWAY. As I was headed home from the airport I saw Slam. What are the odds? My last day on the island I saw her car in FOB land and called her up... my first day back I see her car again and call. I'm in the same van... freaky. Sigh. I miss my sister already. That and being the biggest bum. I can't believe she made me leave my brother's n64. I better break it to the poor boy gently or he'll break me. My sister better make sure Nic brings it back with her after she visits her. Saw Bebe too. We worked on another crossword puzzle together. He's soo cute when he does those things. I really missed him. ;-D Even thinking of him can't shake my uneasiness. The average fuckin transfer gpa is 3.5. WTF? They're probably all those people who can rack the gpa and carry the whole plate of extracurriculur activities. PLEASE GOD. I KNOW I'M LAZY BUT I'VE GOT POTENTIAL... I SWEAR! AArrgh. Alright. Documents being downloaded is done.. I better go catch on my to do list. 1:8:03==>Wednesday One more week and I'm back home. Adora went back to the Bay this past Tuesday so now I'm stuck at the house all alone. In a way I'm sort of glad because we were going crazy at the malls. I guess I should take it as a sign to get my ass back in gear and start doing drafts for my scholarship essays. I'm now at the library. I walked for half an hour just to get here. I didn't realize the damn walk would be that long. Well... I have been eating a lot so some exercise wouldn't hurt. I've been in Vegas for almost a month and I still haven't worked the strip yet. Sucks to be only 20. I hope I get accepted to USC. I was reading their booklet and the average transfer gpa is 3.5. WTF? So much stress. Why can't UH offer ChemE? I'd have a lot less gray hairs. New Year's on the strip was very interesting. It's the first time I've spent New Year's away from home. There was a whole lot of ass grabbing going around, lots of liquor, and lots of yelling. We didn't stick around to cruise the strip for places where we could dance since my sister didn't want to bother since I am not 21. DAYUM. So we tried to get me in at Suncoast. They weren't checking ID's there which rocked so I got in. The only problem was that they were playing some old school music. Funky Town? Funky THIS! We got our groove on for a while and went wild on the dance floor but we left to check the other casino. No dancing there so we just left and partied a little at the house. Blah blah... The New Year celebration rocked. So yeah. I took a look at my online transcript and my blood began to boil. My damn barbie doll teacher gave me an A- for Discrete Math. Normally I wouldn't care but I am pretty sure that the syllabi for the course said that the grading scale was standard.... A,B,C,D,F... you know? Aren't teachers supposed to stick to the syllabi? I need to talk to her. I guess to much bleach does get to you. FRICK. She even told me that I didn't have to take the final since she was going to give me an A. BITCH. BREATHE. I'm supposed to be on vacation. Yeah. Okay. So far I am doing good at my no chocolate resolution. No solid chocolate. Chocolate cake, ice cream, hot chocolate is okay.... but no candy chocolate... riight. Romeo and I are doing okay. I don't miss him like I did on previous vacations. The first time I was away on vacation from him was for two months and I was going nutso. Am I losing that loving feeling or what? When my cousin and I were staying up late and chatting she asked how the boys were doing and brought up that drama that we pulled. God. I'll never forget that crap. But for some reason I blurted it out that I was actually worried that Romeo and I wouldn't make it. When I transfer will there be time for our relationship? But then again... if a relationship is important enough then you'll make time. But I don't even know if I'll have enough money to go back to Hawaii for Christmas. More family is here on the west coast. It would be more feaible for my parents to fly here so they can spend the holidays with the relatives as well. Sigh. My bebe. I do miss him. When I get back I told him that I would have to stay away from him for a little while longer so I can regulate certain things. We can't trust each other when it comes to certain things. I especially can't trust myself. Yeah. Who gives a rip. I'll wear a rain coat. Muahahahaha. Okay then. Happy New Year everyone. 1:4:03==>Saturday Listening to all the family politics helps me see why my dad chose to live so far away from the drama. Holidays with the family are a new and wonderful experience but the gossip.... I saw USC today. Ain't as ghetto. I'll write about it in another entry later. We're in L.A. now. I gotta go because Adora needs the computer too. Elson if you read this let me know what you wanted from Tarzhay. each does get to you. FRICK. She even told me that I didn't have to take the final since she was going to give me an A. BITCH. BREATHE. I'm supposed to be on vacation. Yeah. Okay. So far I am doing good at my no chocolate resolution. 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