From : kim reyes
To : anyone who'll listen
Subject : stunned silent.as i sit here, solemnly typing this email, my fingers are still a little shaky. every now and again, i look up out my window at the view i've come to know and love, and i'm filled with utter disbelief that the structures that have dominated the fantastic new york city skyline for as long as i can remember are no longer in existence. the twin towers once stood tall and distinctive a mere 20 blocks from me, and i could wake up and admire them perfectly from my bedroom window. but now, in their place, is a ghastly cloud of thick grey smoke and ashes.
i woke up a few minutes after 9 am as my suitemate rushed into my bedroom and drew back the blinds. through sleepy eyes, i saw black smoke erupting out of the top of the north tower of the world trade center. we were all horrified at the sight, and rushed over to the tv. the headline "attack on the world trade center" filled the screen, and soon we'd heard that the pentagon was also hit. as we looked at each other for answers as to what the hell was happening, we turned to face the window and witnessed as the south tower suddenly fell to the ground, turning into a disintegrated mess of ash and debris. i refused to believe my eyes as i stared out the window and saw only one tower, where two once proudly stood. i planted myself firmly in front of the television, my hand fittingly over my mouth as i had nothing to say. friends from downstairs frantically joined us as we watched the news unfold. i continued to stare out the window at a sight i never thought i would ever see. people were jumping out of the burning building in desperate attempts to escape. and a few minutes later, i screamed out in horror as the remaining tower seemed to explode into a puff of smoke as it collapsed in front of my very eyes, which were now filled with tears.
unsurprisingly, the phone lines were jammed and it was nearly impossible to reach anyone. but i got hold of my sister through instant messenger and she came over since her dorm building was evacuated. as soon as my brother called me, he came over too. then my dad finally got through, and he and my mom breathed incredible sighs of relief to hear that we were all safely inside and together. i broke down in tears describing the situation to my mom, who had been shivering in fright since they'd turned on the news. i dialled every manhattan phone number i knew to check if everyone was all right. they were, thank God. i went on instant messenger, bombarded with "ARE YOU OKAY?!" messages and reassured everyone that i was fine. but i really wasn't. i don't think anyone was 'fine'.
every single person had a story. "my uncle works on the 30th floor", "my friend lives near there", "my cousin was supposed to go to work across the street", "my friend was walking downtown when it happened". i have stories of my own, and didn't need to hear any more to realize how close this was hitting, and how much it affected each of us.
school was cancelled. stores closed. subways stopped running. buildings evacuated. sirens blared. people in shock filled the streets. friends consoled each other with hugs. and images burned into our minds, and will haunt our minds forever, as the rest of the world could only sit back and watch.
as scared as i was about further attacks, nothing scared me more than hearing many people's reactions to the terrorism. comments like "nuke all those muslim ragheads" and "it's time for war, they will pay" flooded live news reports, message boards, and conversations. no doubt the nation is filled with fervent anger and devastation, but to encourage what they are claiming to condemn is stupid, sickening, and frightening all at the same time. an nyu student was beaten up in queens today for 'looking middle-eastern', and our muslim friends are afraid to go out at all. in a time like this, hate only breeds hate. in a time like this, it only takes a few "patriotic" ignorant retards to cause further tragedy. in a time like this, all past anger, hatred, and fear become a thing of the present, and only become harder to control. in a time like this, the most powerful nation in the world realized its vulnerability. mourn for the victims. mourn for the heroes. mourn for innocence lost as america are now faced with decisions that will determine the future history of the world as we once knew it.
downtown manhattan is completely blocked off. we're housing friends who live down there, and some nyu facilities have become 24-hour shelters and safehavens. parts of our campus are covered in soot. a parade of police cars and firetrucks drove down 14th street, the street i live on, to prevent any traffic from going down past 14th. people i know are trying to flee the city. and i constantly think about how much i want to be back home.
i stare blankly at the huge smoke clouds smothering our city and go numb. i don't know what to do, i don't know what to say, i don't know what to think, i don't know what to feel. i count my blessings and thank God that i was in a safe place and with people i cared about and who cared about me. thank you for all the emails, im messages, online chats, phone calls, thoughts, and prayers. thank you for being worried, and know that i am safe and i love you all. now, please direct those prayers and thoughts towards the families and friends of the tens of thousands of souls who were victims of the tragedy today.
our world will never be the same.
love kim.
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Watch a very moving tribute to the national tragedy.
The music is very powerful, so make sure to have your speakers on.
Read a compelling and honest composition about Fear.
It was pulled from album liner notes by someone on the Rolling Stone message board.
take me back to the beginning...
