Ok, it would seem that all this about Leonardo
DiCaprio becoming the next and final Anakin Skywalker
has once again resurfaced, and this time it is coming
from sources more closely associated with Lucasfilm
and is being hinted at with greater conviction. Well,
let me just say...
Leonardo DiCaprio is a punk pretty-boy who needs an entire series of savage beatings from
every chapter of the book "Advanced Savage Beatings"
to wipe that contemptable smug smile right off his
ugly face and make him realize that he is less than a
worm. He got lucky...ONCE...with What's Eating Gilbert
Grape, and now thinks he's bigger than Jesus because he was unwittingly made a drone for Jim Cameron, the only person who's ego is larger,
and his perversion of a film "Titanic". So without
further ado is my small list of reasons why DiCaprio
would make probably the worst Anakin Skywalker
imaginable, to be written in intervals, so I
don't get too angry and launch on a pointless tirade.
Today's installment:
He would bring waaaayyyyy too much star power to Star
Wars. The original trilogy hired complete unknowns,
with the exception of Alec Guiness and a bunch of
other accomplished British stage actors. TPM hired far
more well-known, established actors, but none of whom
have ever been featured in what could truly be called
a blockbuster - the closest any of them ever got was
Liam Neeson with Schindler's List, and that was such a
morbid movie and he was so unrecognizable that it
certainly can't be placed in the "blockbuster" column.
Not even Sam Jackson has really experienced the
immense surge of popularity and demand that
accompanies a blockbuster. This type of casting has
always been, in my view, both extremely beneficial and
somewhat intentional. Having a relatively low-key cast
has ensured a greater focus on the story and on the
whole scope of the movie, instead of on individual
performances, resulting in a better all-around feel
for the movie-for example, Ewan MacGregor is a
fantastic actor, yet his Obi-Wan role in TPM was not
what would be considered demanding at all. Having Leo
in the remaining two films would divert every iota of
attention away from the story (which may prove to be
Lucas's best) and focus everything, especially the
media and all those thousands of wretched teeny-bopper
girls, on Leo Leo Leo. Can't you just hear
Entertainment Tonight now? "Leo, you're clearly Jesus
Christ come again! Why won't you admit it now that
you've conquered the Star Wars galaxy! Why!?" Ugh.
Episode II may very well be the greatest Star Wars of
them all...my point is, it may NOT be if Leo is
allowed into this film. I'm not even going to mention
how totally wrong it would be by having him in the
starring role in two of the biggest films in
history...too much power. Sigh.
Well, I guess that's it for now. Man, I hate that guy.
---
John Paige
1.29.2000
Dairy Farmers For Quebec's Independence