Kristiana might not notice anyone coming in the pub, but, more than likely, they can't help but notice her. That's because the self-made bartendress happens to be... perched on the bar. Arms and legs daintily crossed, she belts out a deep, jazzy tune for the audience encircling around her--mostly drunk fishermen. At the sound of the bells' jingles, she improvs a "Bert get the patron...", chuckles at his out-of-tune, mimicking "Pay me first..." and finishes her song with a sweep of her head and hands before taking a long draught of a dark liquid. "And that was 'Faire She Went' for Brelik in the corner! Any next requests?"
Jingle. D'baji's fanfare. And of course, as the bronzerider arrives where the note had implied she might be, he sees her. His delightful Kristiana, all perched places and singing stuff, and he'll happily pause at the door and wait for her song to finish before striding forward, a dubious glance sent towards the liquid. If Kristi's performing, that must mean... So, naturally, he'll do his very best to take advantage of the situation, raising a hand and jumping up and down. "Yeah, I've got a request! That sea chanty! The new one, about the fishermen!" Bounce.
Kristiana had started to point her mug toward a kidlet (how do they keep getting in here?) in the back corner until D'baji's words greet her ears, and she hmms and shakes her head. "Don't know that one," she replies as she slides down from the bartop, walking back behind the bar. "Still filled up, fellows?" she replies to her audience, who give a cheer and take a swig. "Something I can get for you, bronzerider?" she questions toward D'baji as she refills her own mug. "Don't hang around if you're not gonna buy-- you know the rules."
So long as the kidlets aren't the ones taking swigs of the alcohol, we can't complain, right? "Oh... Maybe it's not been fully written yet, then. It was a satirical sort of thing about the heroic fishermen... I remember it being planned out, at least..." And he makes his way through the mob, with the occasional tense smile for thwacks on the back and slurred greetings from old fishermen friends, to lean against the bar, brow furrowing just a bit for her addressing him as 'bronzerider.' "Well, I've known the place to have wonderful mixtures with fruit and that... But dunno how well that'd go over, so just a pint of your darker ale'd be good? Bartendress." Ooh. Fire with fire and all that.
Oh, they probably are. You know those sharding kidlets. They drink and kick people in da shins. "Aah, that piece," Kristiana replies, slurred, with a nod. "I've heard rumor around that, but I think it was lost." She nods again, then. "Last I remember, you couldn't really handle those drinks anyway," she replies as she grabs a tall, chilled mug, sets it on the bar, and fills it to the brim. "So what brings you to SeaCliffs at this time of day? And Nverath outside?"
"A pity," D'baji attempts as sympathy for the lost sea chanty, "as I'm sure it was a wondrous piece. Maybe we could revive it again later. And I can handle those drink now, just that the candidacy and weyrlinghood had my sensitized again... I've gotten over it, I swear. But the ale is good for now." And he leands forward a bit to slurp some of the liquid from the top, so that it might not flow over as he pulls the mug towards him for the second sip. "A note left in my weyr does. Nverath and I got back from our morning routine, and there was this letter..." And he frowns as mightily as D'baji's can frown. "And yeah, Nverath's waiting outside. He was wanting to see you, actually... If maybe I could take you away from your adoring audience here, only briefly, so that at least he could give you his greetings?"
"Perhaps. Got sick of writing. Been doing too much of it," Kristiana murmurs. Sentence fragments. Much easier. "And I suppose you just need to work up your tolerance, then. I'm sure you'd be back to your old self in a time." She nods slowly then as she refills her half-empty mug. "Aah... That... yeah... And okay... for Nverath, I'll leave my audience." She looks toward the fishermen, one of whom stands, but she shakes her head. "Bert, you can take over. Don't want them taking over the place." She chuckles and grabs her mug. "Let's go see Nverath." And without waiting for the rider's words, she staggers... runs into walls... stumbles... and sooner or later makes it out the door.
Lighthouse Cliffs
The road gently bends and curves to the north along the side of lighthouse with a set of stairs leading up to the great fortress at the top of the immense stone outcropping. A large, imposing lighthouse sits at the top of the sharp incline at the top of the steps that have been carved into the rockface. Her body has been painted a whitewash hue with a study, sound base seen at the bottom and windows from which light shines at the top. She looks out to the sea as she sits alone from the hold proper, her body guiding and warning the hold and the vessels out in the bay when the weather turns unpleasant.
The two other buildings almost go unnoticed at first as their camouflage stone harmonizes with the surrounding rock while the lighthouse stands out clearly on the cliff. The two buildings seem to be constructed the same way. Various sized rocks have been fashioned into place, creating a modest sized cabin and the larger Cliffside Pub which rests against the cliffs.
Bronze Nverath is here.
D'baji takes his mug, and manages after her, with a concerned wince for her stumbling, leaving the bar with just a quick, and not very nice, word for a mrowring fisherman. And as soon as Kristiana walks out, that big bronze attempts a few steps closer, head lowering right down to her level and eyes whirling a slow gray-blue. Nverath offers a croon, which fades into the Kristiana Anthem, and soon enough D'baji's made it out as well, moving to lean up against the wall of the building. "Y'know, you don't need to scrub stuff in the weyr..."
Kristiana stands there looking at the bronze wedged head like a kidlet, grinning broadly. "Heya, Nverath..." Though that sounds more like "Hey..Nvr..th..." She takes another long gulp of her ale and turns to D'baji. "Well, okay. I won't. I'm here now, so I won't have to. I just was sharding bored sitting up there all the time..." She shrugs. "Too bad the headwoman quit there. Couldn't talk to her. But like I said, not really important. Got my ale, got my fishermen, got my friends... S'all good."
Nverath whuffles at the bartendress, turning his head then to gaze at his rider. Krist is Not Right. "You can send firelizards off to other riders too, get rides down when we aren't around... And I'm sorry I've not been there as much lately, but there are some things coming up... Just needed to take care of some stuff, is all. Maybe the schedule'll be a bit more predictable once we're in a wing." And the mug is brought to his mouth, to hide a bit of a grimace for her final words. "And good that you're happy... Y'know, we would've taken you back here too... Just that Nverath likes to be up early in the mornings, and the past few nights I've been talkin' to Yuli- we're getting a wonderful lot of things sorted... Are you all right?"
"Ah, yeah, V'er's been kind enough to... you know... pick me up and stuff," Kristiana replies with a shrug, turning away from the bronze and toward his rider. "And I understand. Don't worry 'bout it. I'll just stick around here s'all. I understand how busy you are with whatever." She shrugs then, finding a rock to sloooooowly slide herself upon. "Yeah, been kinda quiet these past few nights, you know, with you talking to Yuli. But that's okay. Feel free to... talk away with her... You'll have more time and freedom to now."
D'baji's grimacing turns into another frown, brow all furrowing and everything. "Look, I'll try an' make some more time, though, 'kay?" That's his promise. Arms are crossed over his chest as best they can be without spilling his drink, and his head tilted to the side somewhat. "Well, we're out late, leave early... Sometimes fall asleep elsewhere, you know how it is. Though I dunno, at least it's got things fixed 'tween her and I, they aren't awkward like they were when she came up here with us... And why d'you mean, time?"
"I don't care how much time you can make, 'baj," Kristiana replies with a drunkened giggle and a shrug. "I'm sick of excuses and 'laters'. I've been dealing with those for four turns now." She leans back on her elbows on her rock, probably not realizing the pain that might cause. She shrugs, then, looking off in the distance. "Kinda weird, you know, when your dragons at another's weyr more nights then your own. And people and dragons have a way of talking." She shrugs. "So... you know... go spend more time with her, because you won't be spending it with me."
"Okay, you /can't/ pull the four turns on me," D'baji points out with a rather bland tone, uncrossing his arms, and taking another swallow of the ale, before setting the mug on some fairly level ground, and standing back up. "I told you then that you didn't have to wait. And it's not been that many nights, just a few... And yes, people talk? About what, pray tell?" Because now he's starting to get a bit worried. And that last line just does it, and he moves the short distance to stand before her rock, and scowl. "And what's that mean, exactly?" And it's not asked angrily, just... Clarifying for himself what's going on.
"I can't pull the four turns on you?" Kristiana questions as she darts upright quickly, voice quite a bit louder. "Do you know what that's been like?" Yeah, drunk Kristi-- she'll finally voice what she really thinks. "I came in one day to see you... and discovered you were at Ista. And I was proud for you. Shocked-- but we didn't know each other well. Then I spent too much time visiting you during candidacy, hoping that... we could still be together or whatever. But I paid for it by hearing all about YuliYuliYuli. I got the hint. I figured that, if you didn't Impress, you would come back to the hold, and things would be normal. If you did, well, I'd might as well say goodbye. And you Impressed. But then you wanted to talk to me. So that was wonderful. But what happened? I got to hear about YuliYuliYuli. And again--I got the hint. And then you pop up and tell me you felt differently. And I'm happy, and go off to live with you-- and the cycle repeats." She shakes her head quickly. "And... it's gotten old. And that's the thing, D'baji, I /wanted/ to wait for you. I didn't want to be with anyone else. But I guess that's something you don't understand." She sighs and takes a deep breath in, then another gulp of her ale. "You know, I thought I was mistaken this morning... That's why I came here, started drinking. I thought maybe I didn't understand certain things, that people sleeping together like they do at the weyr didn't mean anything-- that it was just an action... But..." She pauses, shuddering slightly. "It's not. I feel guilty, and I don't see how others can't. I suppose it's different, is it, having a dragon? Well, I suppose you all can use that as an excuse..."
D'baji actually takes a step back, frown becoming more and more a concerned sort of expression. And, with every 'YuliYuliYuli' he'll swallow. And he won't interject his own words, for once, and will sit properly silent and hear her out and turn somewhat pale. So finally, her words as close to memorized as they can be for one who's only heard them once, he goes about with his rebuttle/explanation/realization. "You... I didn't think you felt that way, for sure. Yuli was my friend, that's all she was during candidacy. A good friend, certainly... Best friend even. Well, after you, but she lived there too." Helpless shrug. "And in weyrlinghood, well... We'd grown together during the candidacy, who else was she going to talk to? And who else was I going to talk to? When we couldn't leave the barracks... And her crush, which apparently was bigger than I thought, for me, that was just an unlucky consequence, probably..." Head shake. "And I don't see why I wouldn't understand the 'wanting to be with no one else' bit. Sure I do. I want to be with you, I love only you, so it's the same idea... And sleeping together..." And as this is brought up, he gives a bit of an 'oh.' "That's... It's not like that means anything, though, it's hardly an issue of love... I take it you know, then, I was with her? A follow up from Weyrlinghood. Everyone should be experienced before their dragons fly, and it's getting to the time when dragons will start flying. Never know how long afterwards any given gold will wait. Some come early... But in the end, it' snothing to do with how you feel for someone. I just knew that if she needed, she could talk it over with me. Might not be something she could do with many other guys... But if you get right down to it, lust and love are totally different..." No apologies yet. He's still got to try and defend his position.
Kristiana finally pauses in her stream of words to catch normal breath, hands bracing herself on either side of the rock, ale having been placed at her feet for a brief moment. "No, I'm sure you didn't. It was more in the back of my mind," she replies, her voice growing quieter. "And I thought I was being silly, with you two being just friends... but I couldn't help but think you might feel differently for her, with the way you acted when you talked about her. But I realized you cared about me, so I didn't worry too much about it. But it was definitely there... in my mind..." She takes another deep breath. "Yeah, the sleeping together," she replies staring stonily at him, "after what? Two sharding sevendays of my being there? If even that? And I don't care. I'm not going to be with a man that goes to another woman's weyr for... duty. If that's what being weyrmated is all about, then I don't want a part of it. And considering her 'crush'... yeah... I'm sure she felt exactly the same way as you. And..." She raises an eyebrow at her last sentence. "I suppose it's normal for men to lust. But to know you're lusting after her, sleeping with her, while I'm alone in your bed... No... It won't happen. I can't help but wonder, too," Kristiana murmurs thoughtfully, probably speaking over his words as she looks up toward the clouds. "If it was to... you know, give her experience, why did you sleep with her more than once?"
D'baji deflates somewhat from his rant, lips pressing tight against each other, both to keep him silent, and give him a way to fidget that wouldn't be too obvious. He hopes. "Well, what can I say? I do care about Yulianna too. I've no choice, if you're going to confide everything to someone when you can't talk to your dragon, you have to trust them, respect them, all that, right?" And her position on the whole sex deal is considered as best he can consider it, lower lip being chewed at while he's silent. "Don't think it was like, oh, she's here, I can do whatever, I didn't... I don't mean to be taking anything for granted or that... But, in the Weyrlinghood, the very beginnings she was worried about when Miya'll have her maiden flight... And she came to me with it, right? And this was before I'd seen you, I'll note, so I couldn't technically be loving you then... I told her I would, if she hadn't found anyone... I promised her, is all, it seemed fine at the time. And I still don't understand why you think it's such a big deal." And his quiet tone changes to something rather exhasperated for that last sentence. And it drops to somewhat quiet for the next bit: "And the first time, it wasn't like it was this overpowering lust, it was just... She's Yuli, she's not been with anyone, we're at a turn and a half now. The second time was... I can't explain it, I guess, it just... She was there, and I was there... And all these old feelings, the protectiveness of her and that, they'd all been brought back up. But I don't love her." That said, he pauses, and adds, with something of an intrigued tone: "You're really hurt by that, aren't you?"
"It's fine that you trust her, D'baji, and it's fine that you're her friend," Kristiana says slowly, mainly so she can enunciate her words. "And I don't know why you can't technically love someone without seeing them, but if that's the way you see things... As I told you before, I had many... opportunities while you were at Ista. V'er for one, and I turned them down, because I had a feeling I loved you, and it had /nothing/ to do with seeing you or not seeing you. But I guess people are different when it comes to that. And so you slept with another woman to fulfill a promise. How chivalric of you, bronzerider." Her words will remain crisp, as will her thoughts, due to emotion and... well... a day's worth of alcohol. Speaking of which, she reclaims her mug, taking another drink. "You don't understand why I think sleeping with her is a big deal? Or fulfilling a promise? So I can sleep with whoever I want then, too, if I stay with you, which I probably won't? That case... I should give that bluerider another call." She snickers, rolling her eyes, as she drinks more. "I don't care who you love and who you don't love. I... I just don't care anymore. Yeah, I'm hurt, but... it'll pass."
"Not like that... I mean, after Nverath I hadn't spoken to you... I had no way to know if I loved you. Or if this person I was clinging to wasn't really there, cause I'd changed, and what if my perception of you had too? It seemed a waste, and a wondrously good way to set myself up to get hurt. So I stopped thinking of you like that, for the time, because was it even you I was thinking of? I went over this in a letter or something, I'm sure I did..." Frown again. "It's... I didn't think you'd mind. In my mind, there seemed nothing wrong with it. It's not like I'm going from one random girl to the next. I care for Yuli, she and I have a history, I'd made a promise to her, I was worried about her, and it brought us back to a friendship of sorts, which is something I /did/ want. But enough about her for now." Because she'd probably not like to hear any more from him on that subject, he's not even wanting to hear too much more now. "If... If you want to, I suppose, I can't stop you, can I? Sure, I'd be a bit jealous, but it's not... It's just sleeping with someone." He can't get over that. "And I'm sorry, really, if I'd known it'd make you feel like this, believe me, I wouldn't have stayed with her the first or second night... And you might not care who I love or not, but I do, cause that's where it matters, and /that/, for me, is where the faithfulness comes in. How I feel for you..." Brace yourself for Deba's lack of romance, "It's completely different than for any other women I've been with in a sort of relationship... It's more... intense, or- well, it's more, and I want to be with you... And if you feel like that, with the whole sleeping with people... I don't have to. I can just be with you, if that's what you want."
"Okay, I know what you mean," Kristiana murmurs, looking down at her glass. So she's been beaten on one point-- but just one! "I was worried, too, that Nverath would have changed you." She glances toward the bronze then back toward D'baji. "And I don't care about any promises you made," she continues with a shrug as she runs her finger over the outside of the mug. "That doesn't count for the second time, or any more times after this, and no matter if you even bother saying 'it won't happen again', hearing your view, I can't help but not believe you. I just..." She laughs lightly, crossing her legs. "I don't see how you could look at sex that way. Yes, you say you might be jealous-- but that's /not/ what a relationship is about. I know, I have holder ideas, but I like those ideas. I'm comfortable with those ideas." She raises an eyebrow at him as he speaks of how we would not have been there those nights. "I sit up in your weyr... First, I make sacrifices to be with you--leaving friends and a job I love--to be with you. And I sit in your bed... for nights... knowing that you're in someone else's bed? And I'm supposed to be... nonchalant about that? See... I guess I'm just odd. I worry about how things will effect you all the time, so I wonder if you... do the opposite. I mean, sure you do, sometimes, but not when it especially matters." She snickers, shaking her head, voice growing quieter. "But don't you understand?" she replies, shaking her head. "That's the thing-- if we're with one another, and only one another, that feeling we have for one another... will maximize things, without you having to... run around. That's what made me nervous, I suppose--knowing how it could be. And like I said before... You could say that, D'baji, that you'd just be with me... But... I don't know what to think of those words."
Nverath croons when he's glanced at, as he can't do much else in the situation. But he can sense it, and would lend support if he could. So he croons, until she's looked back to his rider. "Nothing I can say can explain that second time. Except, maybe, I wanted to. The first time, I have to be blunt, I enjoyed it. Yeah, in the most physical sense of the word, but I liked it. So the second time, I just... I wanted to." D'baji shrugs, wincing in preparation for how he'd imagine that'll go over. "And I don't know if I've ever had properly holder ideas. They change quite frequently," he admits with a hint of a wry smile. "And I appreciate the sacrifices you've made to be with me, I do. And to be perfectly honest... I never thought of the 'now' what it'd be like for you. I thought before, I thought how I figured it'd be afterwards... But never thought of you bein' alone... And I'm sorry for that too." The pile of apologies grows. "And I do think of you, yea... But probably in a different way than you think of me... Cause I... I guess, I see things from my viewpoint. And I ask Nverath sometimes too. But I'm not good at looking at it from others' perspectives, I so often get that wrong... So I used my values to judge it." And for her question of understanding, he shakes his head somewhat. "I don't know...The thought'd crossed my mind... But then again... I don't know, such ideals seem sort of odd... Foreign, if you will? And I guess... Well, I'll try and understand, and I know my promise can't be much, you've said that... But in the way I see things, yes, sex and love I think are different. And maybe they aren't, and I've just not been proved wrong, or not noticed, but I've, until right now, thought that they were. But love's more important, y'see, cause that's where you get to be content and happy with someone, and that's important. That contentness, for me, Krist... Kristi." And a deep breath as he goes with the best oath he can manage of "The way I feel for you, like I said... Kristiana, I'm absolutely in love with you, and that words gets tiring, I know, but that's the way it is. And if my staying away from other people in that way matters /that/ much to you, then I can't help but do it. We've had to curb those things before, and for you there's more than just rules to worry about."
Kristiana just frowns deeply at him, shrugging, looking downward, gulping, staying silent because she doesn't know what would happen if she opened her mouth. "There's nothing you can do about it," she replies very softly when he talks of her being alone, and she wipes her hands on her thighs. "It's too late now. And then... well, despite those nights, I guess there was nothing you could do then. In a way, I realized that's how it would be, my being there without a job, but I could've gotten one in the kitchens or something." Her quiet voice drops to nothingness as she listens, eyes still sent toward the ground. "Well, I don't feel content with it being that way," she finally replies with a slight snicker, looking back up toward him. "I feel... used... in a way. I just can't accept the way you consider things, probably the way you can't accept how I consider things, and if we have two different ideas, then it probably won't be... happy times. And I'd hate to make you have to change what you want and feel is right, to... I don't know..." Oh, Faranth, watch out. The drunkard's about to start crying. She pulls her knees up to her chest, forehead leaning against it, arms wrapped around her legs, and her voice comes out a muffled, "I believe you love me, and I love you, but I'm just...I don't want to feel that hurt again, Deba."
D'baji shakes his head, getting a downright pained expression (though, y'know, it /is/ his turn to do that by now) and peeking up at her. And her rock. "I know what that's like too... Y'know, the boredom or whatever. But you /could/ get a job. And once Ista gets a new headwoman, we could maybe look into a pub for the Weyr, eh? And I don't mean for you to feel used... And I'm sorry if I did that... Shards, I'm just sorry for hurting you at all, I never wanted to, it just... Like you said, difference in how we consider things... And I can accept how you feel, you know. It sort of makes sense... Cause I feel the same about some things, just not as many things as you do, I guess... And sometimes people need to make changes if they're going to be together... I would, you know. I told you I would. And there would have to be at least some happy times..." And he'll go silent for her shifting, and her last sentence, quietly getting to his feet, and perching tentatively on an unused bit of her rock, reaching a tentative hand towards her shoulder. "And... I know I can't promise that you won't get hurt... Because that's an impossible thing to promise. But that's the risk in it... And if we talk more about this, then, maybe... Well, it could help if we know each other's viewpoints, right?"
"Yeah," Kristiana mumbles softly, pushing away her ale for once. "Or maybe I could be the headwoman?" She snickers and winks. At least she's getting some humor back. "I don't know... And I guess you didn't realize, but... it was just so sudden... Not long there, and..." She nods slowly, biting her lip. "I mean, I could try to be more openminded, but I think it won't work with some things. I'll... give you a chance, yeah. I mean, not like a trial run or anything, but... go back, and... if something else happens, then... that's /it/. I mean, flights I can understand, but...." She shakes her head again. This, by the way, is the ... pose. "And there have been happy times, since you've been able to go *between* and since you've graduation, yeah, so hopefully, hopefully..." All this before she begins her sharding sniffling, and she looks over to him, head resting sideways on her knees, hand raising to wipe her cheeks. "I suppose so. We've always done so well at talking before," she replies softly, chuckling.
D'baji offers a bit of a grin for the comment, nodding. "I'm sure you could be a great headwoman." So long as she has someone with a bit of a 'stronger' personality behind her... But we'll not go into that right when she's agreeing to come back. "Yeah, I guess it was fairly soon... But with the way everything was working all at once... But nevermind. I can only apologise so much before it's just words re-inforcing an idea I've already set in motion." And here he'll dare to get just a bit closer to her on the rock. "And I know how you feel about this now, right? So it'll be better like that... And now Nverath knows what that causes, I'm sure he'll support me all the way..." As the dragon isn't particularly liking the awkwardness here. "And we'll figure out flights as they happen, eh? See how it works, with you there and that..." Leaving that topic, though. "An' I'm sure we'll be fine... If we really feel so much for each other, you'd think we'd be able to work through this, eh?" And now he'll very slowly attempt to bring an arm around her. Because his player feels the need to do this anti-powerplay thing, even if it's only for this situation. "And you don't mind if I still talk and that to Yuli, right? As friends, completely, of course."
Kristiana snickers and shakes her head. "Sure. I could end up like Iona--nothing against her. Fisherman loving rider hater..." She snickers again at that thought. "I really am gonna be... unsure for a while, I want you to know. I just feel like you broke a barrier of trust, even if you didn't mean to, especially since you /must/ have felt something for avoiding telling me.... I'll be light on my toes, so to speak." Aka: Keep a bag by the door and be tense around him, like she is now-- and just when she was starting to get comfortable, too. She looks toward Nverath, the one-dragon bronze. See, why can't his rider be more like that? ;) "And... sure... just one of many rocks in the path," she replies with a sigh, moving slightly to lean against him as she bites her lip. "And... talk to her? I guess. 'That'... I'm not sure what 'that' refers to, so I dunno, as long as 'that' isn't /that/... And I think I'm about to be sick..." So forget the arm around her. She rushes off the rock, kicking over the mug in a clash of grass, and toward the pub. Hopefully it's not too crowded...
"Well, despite their smell, the fishermen aren't too bad. When they're sober. And even some when they're drunk." But D'baji had worked with the guys, so he's gotta be a little biased towards them, even if subconsciously, most of the time. "And... I guess that's understandable. I mean, that you'd be like that. Y'see, the reason I hadn't told you right away... Just, y'know, the first mornin', Yuli'd brought that up- how you'd do with it... And without that sort of... surreal thing beforehand, it worried me, is all..." So there's his confession: He'd been afraid that she'd take it this way. "No. Certainly not /that/. I mean, we'll probably discuss that, but no... Y'know. Now that I know how that'll work out, though... Yeah." And his arm is removed somewhat too as she heads off the rock, a bit of a concerned blink given her way. Ah well. Just so long as she doesn't throw up while they take the Nverath route home...
