The Best of the Worst Country Song Titles

1. Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goalposts Of Life
2. Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In Bed
3. Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye
4. Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure.
5. How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
6. How Can You Believe Me When I Say I Love You When You Know I've Been A
   Liar All My Life?
7. I Been Roped And Thrown By Jesus In The Holy Ghost Corral
8. I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life
9. I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling
10. I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me
11. I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart
12. I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You
13. I Wanna Whip Your Cow
14. I Would Have Wrote You A Letter, But I Couldn't Spell Yuck
15. Wouldn't Take Her To A Dawg Fight, 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win
16. I'd Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy
17. I'm Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life
18. I'm The Only Hell Mama Ever Raised
19. I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart
20. I've Got The Hungries For Your Love And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line
21. If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You
22. If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low
23. If My Nose Were Full Of Nickels, I'd Blow It On You
24. If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will
25. If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?
26. Mama Get The Hammer (There's A Fly  On Papa's Head)
27. My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love Jesus
28. My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field, While Your Dear John Was Breaking
    My Heart
29. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him
30. Oh, I've Got Hair Oil On My Ears And My Glasses Are Slipping Down
31. Pardon Me, I've Got Someone To Kill
32. She Got The Gold Mine And I Got The Shaft
33. She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger
34. She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart
35. She's Got Freckles On Her, But She's Pretty
36. Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone
37. They May Put Me In Prison, But They Can't Stop My Face From Breakin' Out
38. Velcro Arms, Teflon Heart
39. When You Leave Walk Out Backwards, So I'll Think You're Walking In
40. You Can't Have Your Kate And Edith Too
41. You Can't Roller Skate In A Buffalo Herd
42. You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat
43. You Were Only A Splinter As I Slid Down The Banister Of Life
44. You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly