Bowser's Diary by Kamek2K

Bowser's Diary (p. 1)

Forward: I've decided to start writing about my life and stuff so that when I get all growed up people will know what I was like as a baby boy. Also, Kameky wanted me to do this so I could remember stuff that I did a long time ago and he also said I should continue to write in my diary, even when I'm all growed up. The dates of the entries in me's diary are in Y.A.B.B which means Years After Bowser (that's me!)'s Birth. Ok, have fun reading me's diary!

3/29/01 YABB

Kameky is tching me two right stff nww btt im nto vewy gdoo at it tey. Tday i drakn a milky adn i think i grewed almst two inchse!


Mes a thinkin i be stoppn writn in mes diary untli i canget bettew at witing. I wonot tll Kameky dow.


I've gotten better at writing now dat im a bgi boy! Actully, Kameky fondu out i not be witing in me journal and he getted mad.


I'm sad today cuz a little dinosow wsa meany to em when i was playing outside. Me thinks his name was Yoshi ow someping.


Gosh! Kameky made me take 6 hours of writing cwass after i wrote me journal yesterday. He didn't think me very good at writing, but now i'm better than ever! Today mean dinosaur stole me milk and i chased him to where he lived! He had a wittle baby with him dat he said was called Mario. He was vewy little and i bet couldnt even write! Haha! I'm better dan him!

The following year...


Today, I went to visit my friend Yoshi's house again. Kamek says that I shouldn't hang around them, cuz they're too wimpy for me, but I think they're fun! Mario and I are bestest friends now, too! He gave me some of his milky, and that made me happy!


Something bad happened today. I was about ready to go over to Yoshi's house again, when Kameky told me to stop. He said that I couldn't go see the Yoshi's anymore, because they weren't good enough for me. Kamek made me stay home and practice my fire breath all day long. It was bad.


Kamek didn't let me go see Yoshi and Mario today, again. He made me practice my attacks all day long. He says I can use them for self-defense.


Today I was really mad at Kameky for not letting me go see my friends. He said it was a bad idea to go see them ever again. I got so mad that I scorched his cloak with my flame breath. He got mad at me and was calling me names. I got soooo mad!


I snuck in to Kamek's room last night after writing my journal. I put Piranna Plants in his bed, and when I saw him in the morning, he had red stuff coming out all over him. I liked that red stuff. When I tried to touch it, he told me not to. I punched him in the face and he's been sleeping for a while. I bet he'll wake up soon to tuck me in for bed, though.


Kamek let me go see Yoshi and Mario today! I guess he forget about what I had done to him yesterday. But when I went to see my friends, we got in a fight over which game we should play. I wanted to play Super Smash Bros., a game I made up where we all fight. But Yoshi and Mario wanted to play catch. I wacked them both with my tail, and now Yoshi's mommy won't let me come play with them anymore. That made me mad!!! When I got home I beat up Kamek some more, and he seemed more happy the more I beat him up. What a weirdo.


Stupid buttface, also known as Kamek, didn't let me go see Mario and Yoshi today. I didn't think I could anyway, but I wanted to get even with Yoshi's mama. Instead, Kamek made me eat fried birdo all day long. He said it would make me grow.


I'm confused. A couple weeks ago I woke up and didn't remember anything. It felt like I had just been born, yet I knew alot, just not about my past. This koopa named Kamek said he would help me. Today, he taught me about who was good and bad in the world. He said that he had looked in to a crystal circle and found out that two peoples named Mario and Luigi were going to do bad things to us unless we stopped them.


I strangely began to remember things today. I remembered who Kamek was, and who I was. I was a king. The one thing I didn't recognize was where I was. My 'castle' seemed different. Kamek called it a castle. Weird name. I kinda remembered a place that looked sort of like it, but different. It was almost as if I'd moved houses. That's ridiculous though.


Today, Kamek started to teach me about life. He told me that in life, I would need to stop all things that opposed me. He also taught me about decision making, and war. He says I would need to plan a way to stop the two people, Mario and Luigi.

To be continued...

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