4. A Talk for Female
Students
There are many things of
common interest to all of us, but here I want to address myself exclusively to
you women.
When we study the Gospel
carefully we can see that Christ assigns women a special place beside him and
offers them different possibilities from those open to men. This is why I have
decided to devote the second part of today's talk specifically to you.
Similarly, I shall dedicate the second part of tomorrow's time to the men.
We shall focus our
attention on the specific role entrusted to women by Christ.
I would ask you to bring
to mind all Christ's meetings with women, and theirs with him-and we find many
cases of both in the Gospel-so that we can arrive at a balanced and integrated
interpretation. There were such episodes as his conversation with the woman of
Samaria, his meeting with Mary Magdalene, and that with Lazarus' two sisters,
Martha and Mary, and also the person of Mary, his own mother. We find a wide
variety of personalities, and can observe their relationships with Christ in a
number of different situations.
The first thing which
strikes us is that when they approached Christ these women acquired a certain
interior autonomy, even those who were "fallen women." One clear
example of this is the woman of Samaria, whose conversation with Christ is
reported in the fourth chapter of Saint John's Gospel. This meeting with the
woman of Samaria takes on the character of a real "event"! Do you
remember their conversation beside the well? Christ asked for water, and the
woman was surprised that he, as a Jew, would ask water from her, a Samaritan.
The conversation then moved on from natural to supernatural water, the water of
life, which is the drink of the immortal soul. At a certain point Christ told
her: "Go, call your husband, and come here." "I have no
husband," she answered. "You are right in saying, 'I have no
husband'; for you have had five husbands and he whom you now have is not your
husband." We find a sort of libera tion in the woman's reaction: Christ
has set her free by revealing the truth. He has gained her trust and\ shown her
the significance of her position. There must have been something in this
-conversation which did not humiliate or mortify her, crushing her, but
relieved her.
The same thing happened
with Mary Magdalene.
Let us also recall
Christ's words to Martha and Mary in the village of Bethany. He spoke to Martha
in a most surprising way: "You are anxious and troubled about many
things; only one thing is needed" (Luke 10:41-42). It seems that he wanted
to reprove Martha, the worker, who was too taken up with her tasks and gave no
thought to her interior life, so that she was not free.
In every Gospel episode
involving meetings with women, they find their independence at Christ's side.
This feature is particularly striking in the case of the Mother of Christ. Mary
is a very simple person, but has great individuality and is very much herself.
Her motherhood itself was the fruit of choice: "Let it be to me according
to your word " (Luke 1 :38). This phrase decided everything, then and for
the future. We have very few details about the Holy Mother, but those few
details we do find in the Gospel tell us a great deal and enable us to see her
individuality as a woman.
She was not only Christ's
Mother, but also a mature, independent companion throughout his life. We see
this in the Gospel, from the marriage feast of Cana to Calvary.
With Christ there are no
slaves, even if the social system at that time treated women as slaves, not
only in Rome but also among the Jews. There are no slaves at Christ's side. The
public sinner becomes a promised bride, a sister. However, a woman is above
all a mother.
Let us consider the whole
question of the concept of emancipation. Old as this concept may be, we are
today witnessing its spread, so that it has had an equalizing effect between
men and women in various ways, in both professional and political fields and
in our very lifestyle.
Equality between men and
women is completely comprehensible, so long as it is based exclusively on the
inner maturity and independence of women, as we find these illustrated in the
Gospel. Without a sense of being an individual and of planning her own life and
future, exterior emancipation will destroy a woman instead of improving her
posi tion. There is no doubt that this exterior emancipation and equality with
men often produce split personalities in women, especially those with
professional training. The tasks, duties and problems of their lives simply
double, and conflicts are generated.
Let us consider a woman's
interior character as compared with that of a man. Christ understood this
difference perfectly. Women are more feeling and intuitive people and become
involved in things in a more sensitive and complete manner. This is why they
need a support (for example, in the Gospel we find them "by Christ's
side"), great maturity and interior independence.
It may sound paradoxical,
but this independence simultaneously makes the woman free of love and open to
it. It makes her free of love with a smalll-love as necessity, restriction,
mere occasion, or eroticism-and opens her to the Love which is the fruit of
conscious choice and in which she can find her own life and vocation. However
paradoxical it may be, this need is inescapable, since women take part with the
whole of their sensitivity.
They are much more
susceptible than men toO things like psychological conditioning and must
therefore gain .this independence through an interior struggle which does not
banish love from their lives but instead recognizes it as the underlying
motivation in the Great Love of which they are capable.
This autonomy is also
necessary from a social viewpoint. With Christ women are independent, and, so
to speak, do not need men; when they get married, this independence means that
they are persons and not objects. Here is where there can be so much
disappointment or delusion. Without the mediation of love, a woman remains an
object for a man. I am thinking of remarks like this: "I married very
young, without finishing school, and now I am suffering enormously." The
story continues, and we can summarize the reasons for her suffering as follows:
"I suffer because I'm an object and not a person." "Doesn't your
husband show any sensitivity and sympathy towards you?" "No. He
always wants just one thing." This is even more painful if it is the
conclusion of what you thought was love and to which you gave yourself
wholeheartedly.
This is why a woman needs
interior emancipation, which means that, in love, she can stand beside the man
as companion and together they can build something. This is a woman's basic
vocation and it explains the nature of marriage. Marriage is not simply an
institutionalization of the sexual life. If this were the case it would destroy
any feelings of the two partners, and especially those of the woman.
This is why a woman is
first and foremost a mother. A mother is the person who generates, which means
bringing up-and bringing up not only children-with love and intuition. Her
basic task is that of educating, and when she shares the responsibility for it
with men she cannot be simply an object for them. It is noteworthy that Jesus
Christ, the Son of God, God made man, allowed himself to be educated by a
woman, his mother; this is significant for us.
With Christ women blossom
as mothers. When a woman is, so to speak, defined by her beauty and her
feelings, one sometimes has the impression that she fits comfortably into the
role of an object-the object of admiration, the center of attraction, a doll,
and finally something that is simply "used."
Women must develop what I
would call a spiritual instinct for self-preservation, and a certain method of
defending their own personalities. The path to this is interior independence.
Women must also bring men to recognize their independence and to see that this
female independence in no way threatens their union, but on the contrary helps
form and strengthen it. The man must come to understand tha t the woman is a
person, tha t she can be a mother, and that motherhood is a wonderful thing and
a profound experience-and one in which the man cannot simply assume the role
of spectator. With her motherhood she communicates to him the inestimable
value of fatherhood.
You may be thinking that
he receives this without giving anything in exchange, while she pays for it!
However, the fact that she pays means that she must certainly take her
motherhood seriously. It is a terrible insult when people ask us, "Well,
what do you want?" These people are for the most part Catholic women; and
they destroy unborn babies. "What do you want?" We have a great
responsibility and duty to fulfill.
In any case, in the path
of love which life entails, always remember that above every love there is one
Love. One Love. Love without constraint or hesitation. It is the love with
which Christ loves each one of you.
Amen