Day One Hundred Seventeen: Me Day
"Today is all about me, myself and I, looking after number one, and sticking up for oneself. Be selfish. Don't give up your seat to the little old lady. Eat the last cookie. Park in the disabled space. Play with your kids' favorite toys. Shout out your own name during sex."

Well, the only one of those there's an opportunity for is the disabled space. For those of you who know me, I park at least halfway back in the parking lot. It makes sense to me. Everybody else is fighting for the first ten parks. You have to wait for people to walk behind you when you pull out. You usually have to spend five minutes finding a park, and two more waiting for it. Me, I park halfway back. No wait. I can pull right out and leave. I'm parked and unparked faster than everyone else. And really, how lazy are you when you don't want to walk farther than three parks from the store?

I'm so the last person to have a day all about them. I did, however, learn that I married a coworker under weird circumstances in somewhat odd attire today at some point in the past, so one point for me.

Seven up (the Spot game was the greatest NES game ever, by the way):
Day 118: Snooper Day
Day 119: Sense-less Day #2
Day 120: No Expenses Day
Day 121 & 122: No TV Weekend
Day 123: Emergency First Aid Procedure Day
Day 124: Parrot Day

Day One Hundred Sixteen: Siesta Day
Now Playing: 'Here Comes The Sun' (see, my radio station on Launch is too good!)
"Today place this sign on your door handle."

The sign: "HI! I am currently experimenting with the concept of siesta. Therefore any issues, no matter how important, will have to wait to be brought before me between the hours of 11 am and 3 pm. If I like this I will start doing it every day. PS: A light lunch would be great when I wake up."

I put it up. It did me no good, as I was at work between the hours of 11 and 3 yesterday. Such is life.

Special note on the bottom of the page! "ATTENTION! Forward planning: Book your vacation now for the week of Day 205. This year, you are going to France. Mais oui!"

Woohoo! France!

Up next, Day One Hundred Seventeen: Me Day!

Day One Hundred Fifteen: Above The Law Day
Now Playing: 'Just a Pill'
"Today use this exclusive pass to violate a law of your choice."

Well, for one thing, the guy on the pass looks like "Macho Man" Randy Savage (the tower of power too sweet to be sorry, funky like a monkey).

Basically, this gives me the right to break one law. I... um... didn't use my turn signal once, I'm sure. Sounds like something I'd do, but only in a careful situation (like a parking lot... I'm liking the two working turn signals thing I have going on now with the new ride).

Tomorrow is what we like to call Day One Hundred Sixteen, Siesta Day!

Day One Hundred Fourteen: Banana Day
Now Playing: 'Cry'
"Today: tattoo a banana and display it on your windowsill. (Scrape its skin with a sharp inplement and watch it go black in minutes!)"

I would, but two problems.

1. No bananas.

2. I just went on an ant-killing rampage last night. I try not to leave food out for them, really. They might carry off the cat or something.

Up next, Day One Hundred Fifteen: Above The Law Day!

Day One Hundred Thirteen: F Day
Now Playing: 'I'll Make Love To You'
""Today see a film beginning with F. If there is none on in your neighborhood, you may see one beginning with Z."

A list of "F" movies I've seen from the list:
Faculty, The
Fahrenheit 451
Fantasia
Fargo
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Father of the Bride
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Field of Dreams, A
Fifty Four (54)
Final Destination
Flintstones - The Movie
For The Love of the Game
Forrest Gump
Frankenweenie
Freaky Friday
Free Willy

Not on the list, but a great movie: Follow That Bird.

Tomorrow, Day One Hundred Fourteen: Disappointment Because Andy Didn't Do It Day... I mean Banana Day!

Day One Hundred Twelve: Roots Day
Now Playing: 'Killing Me Softly' (Fugees version)
"Today trace your roots. Fill in your family tree as far back as you can."

Let's see.

There's me. I came, obviously, from my mom and dad. Mom has since moved to stepdad and they've spawned two sisters. Mom came from grandma and grandaddy on that side, as did an uncle, who's married to an aunt now. Dad came from the other grandma and granddad, who also let out an uncle, who's married to an aunt, which brought two cousins. That's the very basics. That'll do, pig.

Tomorrow is Day One Hundred Thirteen, and it's F Day!

Day One Hundred Eleven: Mean Day
Now Playing: 'Love Shack'
"Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keep. Test this relationship theory on your significant other."

Tips: "Tell them you'll call and don't. When they say 'I love you,' just say thanks. Accidentally call them by the name of your ex. Suddenly laugh out loud during intercourse."

That is so against anything I would ever, ever do. So no.

Up next, it's Day One Hundred Twelve... Roots Day!

Day One Hundred Ten: Feet Days, Day Two
Now Playing: 'Return to Innocence' (I never left innocence)
"Day 109 and 110, test the foot you get out of bed on."

Day 109 was right foot (Pancho) day. Today, Day 110, is Lefty's turn.

I wonder if anyone even got that joke.

"Has your day been lucky or unlucky?" Monday... let's see. I opened that was okay. I painted over grafitti in the mens' room. "Be patriotic... marry a woman!" Um, thanks? I started doing mass preparing the big boss visit that was scheduled for the next day, then found out (after I finished my to-do list) that it's postponed until Friday. Then I went home and, as I recall, was majorly bored all night. We'll go with unlucky.

"Is there a difference? Which works best for you? From now on, only get out of bed on your lucky foot." Well, Pancho's day seemed better. Right it is.

Day One Hundred Eleven is next... Mean Day!

Day One Hundred Nine: Feet Days, Day One
Now Playing: 'Fell In Love With A Boy'
"Day 109 and 110, test the foot you get out of bed on."

Day 109 represents right foot day. We'll call the right foot "Pancho." That's it there. It's best I didn't get any closer with that camera. It's also best that my feet are currently in their normal state. Well, as normal as size 12 feet get.

I actually usually end up getting up on the right foot, just because it's the one that hits the floor first.

"Has your day been lucky or unlucky?" Let's see, this was Sunday. Sunday wasn't bad. My movie plans were cancelled. That wasn't too lucky. I left work half an hour early. That was good. So down the middle, I guess.

Up next, Day 110 as Footmania 2004 continues!

Day One Hundred Eight: Graffiti Day
Now Playing: 'Who Will Save Your Soul'
"Today graffiti."

So I did. Ready?

There wasn't much else to graffiti besides the giant box of Moon Pies. My grandmother randomly gave me this giant box of "double decker" Moon Pies last week. If there's one thing I need, it's twelve double decker Moon Pies. They've now been tagged.

Next up, it's Day One Hundred Nine, the first half of Feet Days!