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Short Sayings for Bulletins and Signs
JFRministry - 2230 Rex Road - Morrow (Atlanta), Georgia 30294
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2,715 One-Line Quotations for Speakers, Writers and Raconteurs

3,500 Good Quotes for Speakers

Bartlett's Familiar Quotations : A Collection of Passages, Phrases, and Proverbs Traced to Their Sources in Ancient and Modern Literature
by John Bartlett

The International Thesaurus of Quotations

1001 Great Stories & Quotes by R. Kent Hughes

14,000 Quips and Quotes for Writers and Speakers by E. C. McKenzie

1911 Best Things Anybody Ever Said by Robert Byrne

2,200 Quotations : From the Writings of Charles H. Spurgeon : Arranged Topically or Textually and Indexed by Subject, Scripture, and People

The 2,548 Best Things Anybody Ever Said by Robert Byrne

601 Quotes About Marriage & Family

The 637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said by Robert Byrne

The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said by Ross Petras

The 776 Even Stupider Things Ever Said by Ross Petras

Abraham Lincoln Wisdom and Wit

African American Quotations by Richard Newman

African-American Wisdom : A Book of Quotations and Proverbs by Quinn Eli

The All-American Quote Book by Bob Phillips

America's God and Country Encyclopedia of Quotations

American Heritage : Dictionary of American Quotations

American Indian Quotations by Howard Langer

American Proverbs About Women by Lois Kerschen

And I Quote : The Definitive Collection of Quotes, Sayings, and Jokes for the Contemporary Speechmaker

Apples of Gold by Jo Petty

Baseball's Greatest Quotations by Paul Dickson

Benjamin Franklin Wit and Wisdom
   Some new billboards are getting attention around the country.
   Here's a list of all variations of the "God Speaks" billboards. The billboards are a simple black background with white text. No fine print or sponsoring organization is included.
  • Let's meet at my house Sunday before the game. -God
  • C'mon over and bring the kids. -God
  • What part of "Thou Shalt Not..." didn't you understand? -God
  • We need to talk. -God
  • Keep using my name in vain, I'll make rush hour longer. -God
  • Loved the wedding, invite me to the marriage. -God
  • That "Love Thy Neighbor" thing... I meant it. -God
  • I love you and you and you and you and... -God
  • Will the road you're on get you to my place? -God
  • Follow me. -God
  • Big bang theory, you've got to be kidding. -God
  • My way is the highway. -God
  • Need directions? -God
  • You think it's hot here? -God
  • Have you read my #1 best seller? There will be a test. -God
  • Do you have any idea where you're going? -God
  • Don't make me come down there. -God

Many people use "Duct Tape" to fix everything........God used nails
People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care

  • If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend. --Doug Lars
  • A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it. --Bob Hope
  • I know that there are people in this world who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that! --Tom Lehrer
  • I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What good would that do? --Ronnie Shakes
  • Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. --Sam Levenson (1911-1980)
  • Television - a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done. --Ernie Kovacs
  • Always remember this: If you don't attend the funerals of your friends, they will certainly not attend yours. --H.L. Mencken
  • The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate --Franklin P. Jones
  • When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. --Norm Crosby
  • The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn't exist. --Aaron Machado
  • I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. --Henny Youngman
  • The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver. --Jay Leno
  • It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose. --Darrin Weinberg
  • Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life in which you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you. --Fran Lebowitz
  • A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. --H.L. Mencken

Burma Shave Signs
  • Passing cars    When you can't see    May get you A glimpse Of eternity    Burma-Shave
  • Said farmer Brown    Who's bald On top    Wish I could Rotate the crop    Burma-Shave
  • Drinking drivers--    Nothing worse    They put The quart Before the hearse    Burma-Shave
  • At school zones    Heed instructions!    Protect our little Tax deductions     Burma-Shave
  • Within this vale    Of toil And sin    Your head grows bald But not your chin--    Burma-Shave
  • The boy who gets    His girl's applause    Must act Not look Like Santa Claus    Burma-Shave
  • He married Grace    With scratchy face    He only Got one day Of Grace!    Burma-Shave

  • Good decisions come from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad decisions.
  • Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back in.
  • If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
  • There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.
  • If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
  • It doesn't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
  • Never miss a good chance to shut up.
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