| 1. | Besides handcuffs, the chief also carrys chains and leather whips. |
| 2. | Has appeared on both "cops" and "America's Most Wanted". |
| 3. | He empties his service revolvers into donut racks to see which ones have jelly. |
| 4. | Drives around in a Sherman Tank, shooting traffic violators in the ass. |
| 5. | Instead of sirens, squad cars now blaring John Tush. |
| 6. | From the back he looks like Ebert. |
| 7. | Any chance he gets, he takes off his clothes and does push-ups. (video clip of naked Jimmy Smits doing push-ups). |
| 8. | He spends most of the time frisking himself. |
| 9. | He's in love with Bertha. (The german shepherd drug dog!) |
| 10. | Goodbye, uniforms -- hello, Batman outfits! |
