WWF Raw is War Report - August 16, 1999
Hosted by Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler
Taped from Milwaukee, Wisconsin
[courtesy Joe de Leon]

• Triple H and Chyna were shown making separate entrances into the arena.

• Triple H Interview.
- Triple H said he would like to put the focus on the number one contender for the Heavyweight Title, who would take on Stone Cold Steve Austin at Summerslam with Jesse Ventura as the Guest Referee, Chyna, who made her way out. Triple H said Chyna was basking her glory and she made the big time. Triple H said it was an honor to be out with Chyna, after all they had been through. Triple H said Chyna's number one contender slot met as much to him as it did to her. He said they had been side-by-side for a while. He talked about the time Chyna qualified for the Royal Rumble and he put a ton of flowers in a limousine for her. He also talked about the time Chyna qualified for the King of the Ring, kicking a lot of guy's asses. He also brought up a time a time he brought an emerald ring for her that she wore on special occassions. Triple H said it went both ways, as he had always given to Chyna, and Chyna had always given to him. Triple H said he had never asked Chyna for something for until, until now. He wanted the number one contender slot that he had busted his ass for. Triple H politely asked to take on Chyna in a number one contender match. Chyna said, "Let me think about it for a second," and quickly said, "No." Chyna was about to exit the ring, but Triple H pulled her back in. Triple H told Chyna to remember who made her ass, saying he could break her. He said it if wasn't for him, she would be nothing. Triple H said none of what was going on would be possible without him. He said Chyna turned and screwed him. Triple H, calling Chyna an ungrateful bitch, said he would take back what was his. Chyna told Triple H to give it a shot, but he didn't have the balls to beat her.

• Backstage, Stone Cold Steve Austin arrived.

• Backstage, Chris Jericho arrived. He said, "Where is the stage? I must entertain!" • Road Dogg defeated Al Snow via Pinfall.
- Road Dogg hyped up the crowd with his ring introduction. Al Snow left Pepper with Jerry Lawler, who supposedly urinated on him. Snow was on top of the beginning, until he missed a moonsault. RD started to throw his shake, rattle, and roll punches, with one of them accidently hitting the referee. Snow strapped RD in the Texas Cloverleaf, at which point The Big Bossman entered and nailed Snow with his nightstick. RD fell on Snow for the pinfall.

• Backstage, The Undertaker and The Big Show made their ways toward the ring.

• Backstage, the woman who freshens WWF superstars up offered to fix-up Chris Jericho's hair. Jericho said he had the most popular hair and it didn't need to be changed. He said it was enough yacking and needed to head to the stage, since his people were waiting.

• Backstage, Chyna and Triple H were shown on separate screens, gearing up for their upcoming number one contender match.

• Undertaker, Big Show Interview, with Paul Bearer.
- The Undertaker said, "Playtime is over. Sit down and shut up." He said later on the night, there would be match for the Tag Team Titles between The Acolytes and X-Pac and Kane. He said it wasn't important, but rather the winner of the match taking on he and The Big Show at the Summerslam PPV was. The Undertaker said Paul Bearer called up some associates to get two bikes to take two motorcyles through the desert. The story goes that the associate said to Bearer he didn't know if Big Show could make it through the desert because to the 120 degree heat, since only cold-blooded people could make it through. The Undertaker said he filled up the bike of Big Show half-full and made Big Show walk the rest of his way through. The Undertaker then asked Big Show how he would eat. Big Show said he would tear The Undertaker's flesh off and eat it while he (Undertaker) was sleeping, but The Undertaker said he didn't sleep. Instead, Big Show later arrived, with lizard and snake skin wrapped around his boots, carrying his Harley Davidson. A "Y2J" countdown then appeared on the Titan Tron, as Jericho made another spectacular entrance, saying "Welcome to Raw is Jericho." The Undertaker and Big Show looked angrily onto Jericho. Jericho said Big Show and The Undertaker were exactly what he was talking about the previous week on Raw is War, where wrestlers like them were boring fans with their words. Jericho, calling The Undertaker and Big Show morons, said they couldn't put two words together that made since, so he came out to save the segment. Jericho called them the personfication of boredom. Jericho said the only scary about The Undertaker and Big Show was the amount of television time they received, which caused fans to change the channel to look for their hero. Jericho said he was that hero, since he was in the WWF to save it. Jericho said there was finally a superstar exciting enough to bring money in for the company. He said Raw is Snore was officially buried, since Raw is Jericho had arrived. Once again, he said since the Y2J problem was in the WWF, nobody would ever be the same again. The Undertaker said he didn't know what Jericho was trying to say, but the peachfuzz on his chin didn't show much. The Undertaker told Jericho not to interrupt him again, or it would be his last time he would ever do an interview.

• Backstage, Triple H and Chyna were shown on separate screens making their ways to the ring.

• Backstage, Chris Jericho told Howard Finkel he was there to save the WWF and the employees' job. Finkel said he understood Jericho, as Jericho said finally someone believed in what he was saying. Finkel said, "Amen. Can I get you a beverage [an Energy drink]?"

• Chyna defeated Triple H via Pinfall, to retain her Heavyweight Title shot.
- At first, Triple H went up to Chyna, hesitating, but Chyna immediately laid in some punches. The match soon went back and forth. Triple H was later thrown to the outside, at which point a returning Mankind nailed Triple H with a steel staircase, to let Chyna make the pinfall. Mankind went after Triple H with a chair to the backstage area, but soon returned. Mankind said he had always known there had between a big sexual tension between he and Chyna, because of both of their revealing outfits. Mankind said he would put that aside and wanted a piece of Summerslam, saying if Chyna had the "testicular ... ovalrialol [?] fortitude." Mankind went to the turnbuckle and raised his hands to the fans, only to be low-blowed by Chyna. Chyna said that meant a no. Mankind said, "Are you sure?" As Chyna made her back, WWF Commissioner Shawn Michaels made his way out. Micheals said the last thing he wanted to do was piss Chyna off, because every man that tried to mess with her, ended up with his balls so far up his throat, he would start to choke on him. Michaels said he had a special place for Mankind, though. He said if Mankind wanted, he shall receive. He announced Chyna would take on Mankind later in show in yet another number one contender match. Mankind celebrated, while Chyna went crazy.

• Backstage, Michael Cole awaited for an interview with Stone Cold Steve Austin.

• Test defeated Steve Blackman by Disqualification.
- As the match went on, Shane McMahon made his way down. Test was distracted by him, which let Steve Blackman nail Test from behind and soon from the front with the Lethal Kick. Shane entered the ring and handed Blackman a kendo stick. As Blackman beat down Test with it, Ken Shamrock ran in and tackled Blackman. Shane then whacked Shamrock with the stick, but it had no affect. Shamrock then speared Shane. Blackman used the stick on Shamrock, which had an affect. As Blackman held onto Test, Shane beat him down with it, to the point where the stick broke. The crowd chanted, "Asshole."

• Backstage, Michael Cole interviewed Stone Cold Steve Austin. Cole said Austin had obviously recovered from his injury the previous week on Raw is War, after he was hit with a cinderblock. Austin had a red mark on his head. He said no one bounces a cinderblock off his head and doesn't get a payback, which meant every son-of-a-bitch in the WWF was on his list. Austin said it might had taken 20 or 40 minutes to beat Triple H, but it would probably take five minutes or 15 seconds to beat Chyna. He said it didn't matter if he would take on Mankind for the Heavyweight Title at the Summerslam PPV either.

• Backstage, The Rock arrived.

• Kane and X-Pac defeated The Acolytes with Kane's Chokeslam, to retain the Tag Team Titles.
- Both teams first battled it out on the outside of the ring. The Big Show and The Undertaker, along with Paul Bearer, made their ways out near the entrance-way. Kane and X-Pac were using excellent teamwork to remain on top of the match, but The Acolytes soon started to keep X-Pac in the ring to their advantage. X-Pac later made the tag to Kane after knocking Bradshaw out with a spinning heel kick. As Kane cleaned house, X-Pac got back in the game, as he nailed Faarooq with the Bronco Buster. X-Pac was then caught with the Clothesline from Hell when he turned around. Bradshaw then tried to nail Kane with the Clothesline from Hell, but was caught with Kane's chokeslam. After X-Pac and Kane took the win, The Acolytes continued their punishment on them. X-Pac and Kane were soon up to celebrate their victory.

• Backstage, Hardcore Holly told someone in the locker room to come out when he told him to.

• Some highlights of the sit-down interview with The British Bulldog, along with his wife Diana, conducted by Jim Ross were shown. The interview was scheduled to air later in the show, but never did.

• Hardcore Holly Interview.
- Hardcore Holly said the WWF had finally done it to him, which was backing him into the corner. He said he didn't like that, so he took it upon his superheavyweight self to get another superheavyweight. He introduced his cousin, Crash Holly (Erin O'Grady), who had the same tights and hair color. Crash took the microphone away from Hardcore. Crash was about to say if The Undertaker and The Big Show thought they had problems with Hardcore, they had problems with him, but started to argue with Hardcore over who was the tougher man. Hardcore then attacked his cousin. They brawled through the crowd. • Backstage, Michael Cole interviewed Mankind. Mankind said he picked the time to get revenge. He said he would knock Triple H out if he had to. He said he didn't want to hit Chyna either, because of what they had going, but he would stick Mr. Socko down her throat if he had to. He told Chyna to bring her ovaries, and he would bring his "guys." Chyna was then shown making her way toward the ring.

• Backstage, Stone Cold Steve Austin picked up a cup of coffee.

• Mankind defeated Chyna via Pinfall, to capture the Summerslam Heavyweight Title shot.
- As Mankind and Chyna stared off, in the backstage area, Triple H had to be restrained by WWF officials from interfering in the match. Mankind didn't want to hit Chyna in the face, so Chyna took advantage of the situation. She took two shots to the groin of Mankind, as Triple H made his way out, although officials continued to restrain him. As Chyna was distracted by Triple H's presence, she was caught with Mr. Socko. As Mr. Sock was shoved down the throat of Chyna, Mankind made the pin for the victory. Triple H then ran-in and attacked Mankind, with Chyna joining in. Officials tried to hold the both of them back. WWF Commissioner, Shawn Michaels, made his way into the ring and proudly announced Mankind as the winner. Shane McMahon then made his way out. He said he had already taken care of one problem, but had to take care of another, as the fans chanted, "Asshole." He promised Triple H he would stay out of his business as he made his way to Summerslam, as long as Triple H was the number one contender, but there was a conspiracy. Shane, as the Owner of the WWF, announced yet another number one contender match that would take place later in the show between Mankind and Triple H, with he (Shane) as the Guest Referee. Michaels said Shane didn't have to announce himself as the Owner of the WWF, since he already knew that fact with Shane's McMahon-like hair style. Michaels said he would grant Shane the match, but it would be No Holds Barred/Falls Count Anywhere, with he (Michaels) as the second Guest Referee in the match.

• Backstage, Crash and Hardcore Holly battled it out on a WWF crew semi-truck. Hardcore told Crash to stay down, but Crash continued to get back up.

• Backstage, Mr. Ass, as he scratched his ass, made his way to the ring.

• Backstage, Triple H thanked Shane McMahon. Shane said it was no problem. He guaranteed Triple H would beat Mankind later in the show and beat Stone Cold Steve Austin for the Heavyweight Title at Summerslam.

• Mr. Ass Interview.
- Mr. Ass said there had been a great tragedy, since he had an allergic reaction to herbal ass treatment. The crowd chanted, "Rocky." Ass said he was handicapped and imperfect, but despite the tragedy, he would be at Summerslam to take on The Rock. He said The Rock's face would turn out worse than his ass. The Rock then made he way out near the entrance-way. The Rock said Ass was out there, acting like he impressed everyone and run his mouth Summerslam. He said Ass would suffer from a severe case of diarehha, since Ass was a chicken shit. The Rock then insulted Ass, saying his entrance music started off with, "I'm an asshole." The Rock then bragged about his music starting, with the fans going crazy, and him laying the smackdown on Ass' candyass. Ass brought out the woman, who put the herbal ass treatment on Ass the previous week on G-TV. She had rubber gloves on. The Rock said the woman, or chick as he called her, rubbed Ass' ass with the People's Poison Ivy. The Rock told the woman to head to the back, but then decided asked her if she liked pancakes and where she was from. She answered, "Yes" and "Chicago." The Rock told her to pancacke her ass back to Chicago, Illinois. Ass then laid out across the turnbuckle. The Rock said he could go to the local drug store, get some ointment for Ass' ass, pour it on there, but then fill it up with money piss, and stick it up Ass' candyass. The Rock then made his way down the rampway, as the fans chanted, "Rocky." He had a crew member hold his glasses and asked him how he was doing. Before the guy could answer, The Rock said, "It doesn't matter how you're doing." The Rock then entered the ring and said he would check Ass into the Smackdown Hotel. Ass immediately went at The Rock, where they brawled to the outside of the ring. Ass then pulled out a kendo stick from under the ring, which was apparently the one Shane McMahon used earlier in the show although this one was taped up, and beat The Rock down with it. Ass placed The Rock's face on his ass and said, "If you smell what The Ass is cookin'."

• Backstage, Michael Cole interviewed The Rock. The Rock said Mr. Ass' dream had come true of becoming famous at the Summerslam PPV. He said he would beat Ass' candyass at the PPV and make him kiss the People's Ass.

• No Holds Barred/Falls Count Anywhere: Triple H and Mankind went to a Double Pinfall, to both earn Summerslam Heavyweight Title shots.
- Stone Cold Steve Austin made his way down for color commentary. Shane McMahon and Shawn Michaels made their ways in to Guest Referee the match. Both had trouble coexisting to call the match straight-foward, as they pushed each other around. Mankind and Triple H battled on the outside of the ring. They went up the rampway, where Chyna stormed out and got her cheapshots on Mankind. In the ring, Triple H worked on Mankind's knees. He then brought a chair into the match, which Michaels took away. Shane got onto Michaels, as Mankind nailed Triple H with a Double-Arm DDT. Mankind then pulled out Mr. Socko and shoved it down the throat of Triple H. Both fell down and both were countered by Michaels and Shane. Michaels and Shane argued over who the winner exactly was, but it was soon announced that both Triple H and Mankind were pinned. Therefore, both would go onto to Summerslam to take on Austin in a Triple-Threat Match for the Heavyweight Title, with Jesse Ventura as the Guest Referee. As Michaels and Austin excited, Mankind and Triple H brawled to finish off the show.