Borrow-Queer slept peacefully that night.
"Isawien..." He muttered, rolling over in his sleep.
Then, not so peacefully, he was woken up by a sharp slap in the face.
"What the-?!" he yelled, sitting up in bed. Several policemen were gathered around him. "Oh shit!"
"You're under arrest, Borrow-Queer, son of Pinafore," the police chief said. "For armed robbery, legged robbery and other limb-related robberies."
"Rachel!!!!" Borrow-Queer screamed as he was handcuffed and taken away. "You double-crossed me!!!!!!!"
Borrow-Queer was thrown into jail where he cried like a little sissy girl pants. He suddenly heard a sniggering in the distance.
"Wh-Who's there?" he asked.
Legohash appeared on the other side of the bars, laughing evilly.
"Legohash!" Borrow-Queer roared. "YOU did this?!"
"Well, duh!" Legohash smirked. "After what you did to me, you deserve to be locked up even more... and with you out of the way, Isawien is allllllllllllll mine! Wish me good luck in the State Championships!" He walked off, still laughing insanely.
And so, the great day dawned for the Parody State Championship... Thingy (I can't even remember the name I made up for this... so hopeless)
Anyway, all of Legohash's friends were there... the fan club, however, no longer existed... which was good, I guess. Anyways, so the sun was shining, the bird's were singing... why the hell am I writing about birds and shit when I could be plagiarising songs for this contest? *sigh* A therapist could make a career outta me... Right, TO THE POINT!!!!!!!!!
All the other Vocal Parody Groups (you'd be surprised how many there were in Middle Earth) basically sucked. But with the combined power of Louise Hillier's songwriting abilities and my blackmailing and torture skills, Legohash and Isawien sang the coolest song ever and dragged everyone's asses down!!!
(sing along time! These words are a parody of Simon & Garfunkel's 'Sound of Silence'....)
On countless trips I walked with Merry
Cheeks were pink and nose like a cherry,
'Neath the shadow of a really big tree,
Boromir tried to kill Frodo and probably thought about me
When Frodo managed to kick him in the face
Really hard
But no one can stand the sound of Boromir
And in the midday light I saw
Ten thousand Uruk Hai, maybe more.
They were killing without speaking,
They were shouting without listening,
They were speaking words that voices should never share
And no one dare
But no one can stand the sound of Boromir
"Fool" I remembered you said to me
I didn’t just sit there behind that tree.
When I saw Boromir get shot,
My mouth went dry my palms went really hot."
But my efforts were all in vain,
Because he died
But no one can stand the sound of Boromir
And then the Uruks took us away
Into the wasteland and the grey.
And Frodo tried his mission alone,
Sam wouldn’t let him go on his own.
And Aragorn, Gimli, and Legolas.
Are tracking the Uruks and us.
And Boromir’s dead
But no one can stand the sound of Boromir
Ugh. Anyway, enough of this.... *shudder* romance.... let's go find out what Arwank and Araporn are up to. They're normally very crude and bitchy. Let us escape from this lovey dovery shit...
Arwank and Araporn are sitting at a Council of Elbong, who is rambling on about some upcoming war, evil overlord back for revenge, bong of power in hands of most unlikely creature imaginable... yardy yardy yar....
Arwank looked across at Araporn. "You won't to go help Frieda... don't you?" she said quietly.
"I..." Araporn began. He looked nervously over at Elbong before continuing. "Listen, about the other day, I've been thinking...."
"So have I." Arwank mumbled. "I know you want to make things perfect for me. And I want to make things perfect for you. You're right, Araporn, we do have something good...and special."
"Yeah, we have something great, Arwank." Araporn agreed.
"Araporn..."Arwank whispered, very close to him now. "...I want to have sex with you."
"NOW?!" Araporn said, very loudly.
All the elves and important council people looked up, startled.
Arwank giggled. "Prom..."
"Oh..." Araporn smiled weakly. "O-OK...."
